Part V: To Much Time Alone
Hiko Sojioro gulped down the entire sake bottle.
"I am the fastest sake drinker in the entire world," He boasted to his invisible audience. Sighing, he put bottle and picked up a mirror and began smiling into it.
"I am the best," He told his reflection. He frowned. "You can't be the best if I'm the best, which I am." Still the reflection mocked him. Well he couldn't stand for that so he pulled out his sword and Ama Kakaru Ryu No Hera Meckied it.
"I told you I was the best," He said to the shattered glass. Things were so dull with out Kenshin. "Baka denshi! Who am I supposed to make feel inferior if you're not around!" He howled. Grabbing a new sake bottle he walked over to the lake and looked in. He smiled and his teeth shone in the sunlight.
"I am so-o-o good looking," He said arrogantly. Then the drained the sake and threw the bottle so hard up into he sky it never came back down. He got into a macho-man pose.
"I am so-o-o-o strong," He informed the water. "Everyone wants me." But it just wasn't the same with out other people around.
"Where are the girls from the Aoiya when you need them," He grumbled. Kneeling down he looked in the water and smiled. If nothing else he could practice being conceited.
End
After:
Hiko (miffed): I don't think I'm the best, I know I'm the best.
Kenshin (pitifully): Sessha, sessha means I (looks at Kaoru lovingly) am sorry that I am not there for you master.
Kaoru (ticked off): You're master's a jerk, don't be sorry.
Kenshin (going Battosai): My master is not a jerk.
Hiko (arrogantly): Of course's I'm not a jerk. I'm perfect.
Osamu and Okon (batting their eyelashes): Aww. He's so handsome.
Osamu: And so strong.
Okon: And so completely mine.
Osamu: No, he's mine.
Okon: Mine!
Osamu: Mine!
Remo: Shut up! (The two cower under her power) Good. Hiko: be gone! (She takes out her pencil and zaps Hiko into a pile of dust, just cause she can) Kenshin, you're pathetic. Change back from Battosai to Mr. So-Nice-You-Make-Me-Sick, and Kaoru, insulting Kenshin's master is not going to make him like you. Now everyone else, get going!
(Everyone goes to next set)
Remo (lazily): Come out Saitoh. (Saitoh sneaks out around the corner)
Saitoh (cautiously): Is my wife around here?
Remo (crossing her fingers): No. (Saitoh sighs in relief.)
Saitoh: Now about the next episode…
Remo (with a wave of her hand): Yes, yes, I'll make it look like you're Mr. Tough guy once more. Now go, I don't want to look at you. (Saitoh leaves.)
Tokio: Do I really get to cuddle with my huny-bunchkins next time?
Remo (smiling maliciously): Yes, of course my dear Tokio, of course.