Title: Again
Chapter Five: Never Fall in love with you again
Author: Jaycee
*All necessary formalities are in the first chapter
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Josie hanged up the phone on Saturday evening. "Who was that?" Anita and Gus asked in unison as they saw Josie make her way back to the living room. "That was Noah Walker. He asked me out for tomorrow night." Josie answered as she sat down on the couch.
"You have a date?" Anita asked incredulously. Josie frowned. "Yes! Is that too weird to think about?" she asked defensively. "No Jos. That's not what Nita was saying. It's just that, with Sam in town and all… do you think you should be dating?" Gus asked as he took a sip of his wine.
Every Saturday evening, the three of them would meet up in her house and sometimes in their house to talk about things… and tonight; Josie's love life is the topic of conversation. "Why? How is Sam's being in town connected to my dating men?" Josie asked, confused.
"You always tell me to date and move on… now that I am moving on, you tell me not to date? What is the matter with you guys?" "Josie, sweetie, it's just that we fear that you're only doing this so that you wouldn't be stuck at home all alone thinking about Sam and deal with this problem. Josie, it's time for the two of you to talk. It's been three long years." Anita said as she sunk into the couch.
Josie looked at Gus and saw him nodding. She rolled her eyes and popped some popcorn into her mouth. "Guys… Noah seems to be a really great guy. I've never dated anyone in three years, and I believe it's time. It's just a coincidence that Sam's here when I decided that I have to start dating." Josie explained, hoping that they'll buy her explanation.
The two of them were right, as usual. She only agreed to this date so that she'll stop thinking about Sam. Her thoughts have been driving her crazy that she called Anita and Gus to come earlier than usual. "I just wish that you know what you're doing." Anita sighed.
"Okay, if it'll help… why don't the two of you come tomorrow? It will be a double date. And I'm sure that Noah wouldn't mind." Josie suggested. Anita's face lit up. "That is a great idea! Call him right now and tell him exactly that!"
"Anita… don't you think that we're going to be a hindrance to the two of them? I mean it is their first date." Gus said. "Don't worry Gus. You guys wouldn't be a hindrance, okay? I'll call Noah right now." With a smile, she stood up and walked towards the phone.
* * * On that same Saturday evening, Sam called his friend Jonathan on the phone. "Jon, buddy. I need a big favor." Sam said to his friend as he held the phone between his shoulder and his ear and at the same time, he's cutting up some mangoes for the salad that he's making for him and Rosie, since Lara is at a company party tonight, and he insisted that he couldn't come because the babysitter bailed out at the last minute.
In truth, he purposely didn't call a baby sitter because he didn't want to be stuck in another boring company function. "What is it Sam?" Jon asked. "Can Rosie and I go to your place tomorrow night?" "Sure buddy! Anytime, but why?" "Well, I decided that I'm going to Josie's house tomorrow night."
"Why do you want to go here tomorrow if you're really going to her house?" "I need to leave Rosie with you for a few hours. Then I'll come back. I need a believable alibi to give to Lara." Sam explained as he placed the salad bowl on the table. "Sam… what if she finds out?" Jon asked and Sam can hear the worried tone in his voice.
"That's why I need your help. Please Jon. I need to do this." Sam pleaded as he sat on a chair. "Okay Sam. We'll help you, just be careful, okay?" "Thank you so, so much Jon! I promise I'll be careful." "Your welcome Sam! We'll see you two tomorrow night, okay?" Jon said.
"Yeah. Bye Jon! Time for dinner." "Okay, bye buddy." With that, Sam placed down a receiver with a big smile on his face. "Rosie! Princess! Time for dinner! And Uncle Jon invited us to his tomorrow night, okay?" Rosie ran towards him and hugged his legs. "Yay daddy!" "Yeah yay!" He echoed and the two of them sat down for dinner.
* * * On Sunday evening, an hour before Noah, Anita, and Gus were supposed to arrive, Josie was in the shower, rinsing her hair when she heard a knock on the bathroom door. "Yeah Georgia?" Josie asked as she turned off the shower and wrapped herself with her deep blue bathrobe. "Your friend's here." Georgia answered shortly.
"Which friend?" Josie asked, but Georgia obviously didn't hear her since she can hear that she already started walking away. "It's probably Anita. She's too early." She said to herself. She walked out the bathroom and walked into the living room.
"Anita… you're too… Sam? What are you doing here?" Josie asked in surprise as Sam stood up. Instead of answering, she saw his eyes become huge as he stared at her. She then remembered that there she was standing in front of him, wearing nothing but a bathrobe. "I came here to um… talk to you…" Sam replied, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red. Josie tightened her robe around her. "I was in the shower, I thought you were Anita… Georgia! You didn't tell me who it was." Josie accused her little cousin who was busily coloring on the floor.
"Sorry!" The little girl replied simply, flashing her a smile before turning back to her coloring book. Josie looked back at Sam and saw that he was still staring at her. With the way his eyes lingered on her, it was obvious that he liked what he saw. And that made her feel good. She ran a hand through her wet hair.
"Um… okay… I'll just dress up, okay. Um… wait here…" With that, she practically ran towards her bedroom and quickly shut the door. "Oh. My. God. What in the world is he doing here?" she asked aloud as she started to get dressed. "I'll just worry about that later. Right now, I have a date to get ready for."
* * * Sam stared at Josie as she quickly ran towards her room. He was bracing himself to seeing her again, but seeing her in nothing but her bathrobe, was much, much more than he could bear. She just looks so amazingly desirable in that blue robe of hers.
If Georgia wasn't there, he didn't know if he could control himself from walking over to her and ravish her soft mouth and run his hands through her hair… feel her body close to his… 'Stop it right now Sam! You're here to talk to her and not to make out with her… even though that is a very tempting thing to do.' He thought to himself, and he felt his cheeks burn again.
"Hey Georgia! Is Josie going out today?" He asked. Georgia looked up from her book and nodded. "Yeah. She has a date. With that Noah guy that she met at the PTA Meeting." She explained. Sam sighed. 'Just my luck!' He thought as he felt the jealousy swallow him up. "Really?" he asked. "Yeah. Really." Georgia answered. 'I guess I should just get going.' He thought to himself. 'I'll just wait for Josie so that we can fix up a date when we can talk. Yeah, that's it! I'll do just that!' He sat there, waiting until Josie comes out.
* * * Josie looked at the mirror, as she vainly tried to stop her hand from shaking too much so that she can put on some mascara. "Damn! Get a hold of yourself… its just Sam Coulson… and anyway, you don't have feelings for him anymore… don't you?" She asked herself.
"Ah! Don't go there tonight! There's plenty of time to think about that later!" She reminded herself as she stood up after putting on her make-up. She opened her closet and picked out a blue strappy slip on dress and a white flimsy shawl. To complete her ensemble, on her feet we're white strappy sandals.
She checked her appearance on her full-length mirror. "You can do it Josie! Just breathe and then walk out slowly." She told herself. Squaring her shoulders, she opened her door and stepped into the living room.
* * * Sam stood up as soon as he heard Josie's bedroom door open. He turned his head and then he saw her, looking like an angel in her blue dress and white shawl. "Wow… Josie… you look… wow!" he whispered.
Josie blushed at his comments and was about to open her mouth when the doorbell rang. "Excuse me Sam." He nodded and just stared at her as she walked over to the door to and opened it. "Anita! You're here." She exclaimed. "Yeah… you look great Josie." Anita said as she took Gus's hand and led him in. "Hey Gus." Josie said.
"So, is Noah here… Sam! What are you doing here?" Anita stopped as he stared at Sam. "Pam Kitterman?" Sam asked confused at why she's here and why Josie's calling her Anita. Josie stepped before Pam and smiled sheepishly. "Actually, she's not Pam Kitterman. She's my best friend, Anita Brandt – Strauss. She just pretended to be the sex ed. teacher that day because you caught her that day at school gesturing at me… remember?" Josie asked.
Sam nodded. "Yeah. I remember. So that's why your teaching was very different from what I've been told that a teacher is supposed to teach at a Sex Ed. seminar. Now I understand." The man behind them scowled when he saw who Josie's guest was, but Anita placed a hand on his arm to calm him down, so walked up to him and extended a hand.
"Gus Strauss." He said. Sam nodded. "Sam Coulson." They shook hands and Josie gestured for them to sit down. A few minutes of awkward silence filled the room until the doorbell rang again. "Josie, that's Noah!" Anita said excitedly. Sam watched as Josie's face lit up and hurriedly opened the door. "Noah! Hey!" she exclaimed.
"Hi Josie. You look phenomenal." Noah said as he handed her a bouquet of fresh lilies. "Thank you so much. Come on in." She urged him, as she smelled the flowers. "Noah, these are Gus and Anita Strauss and Sam Coulson. Guys, this is Noah Walker." They shook hands and exchanged greetings when Georgia barged out of her room. "Hey Noah!" She greeted.
Noah grinned as he slapped a high five with Georgia. "Hey there cutie! How are you this evening?" Noah asked. "Great!" She then sat down beside Sam. Josie looked at all of them and then stood up. "So, let's go?" "Josie, my babysitter is not here yet!" Georgia said. Sam smiled at Georgia. "You still need a babysitter? But, you look like a lady to me."
"I know I'm a lady. But Josie wouldn't listen." Georgia replied which got a laugh from all of them. "Whatever you say Georgia. Now, let me just call Sandra so I'll know if she's on her way here. Wait a minute guys." Josie said as she went towards the kitchen to call. Sam stood up and followed her. "Josie?" He tapped her on the shoulder. She was so surprised that she jumped. "Sam! You startled me. What is it?" she asked, as she purposely avoided his eyes.
"We need to talk." He said. "Talk… yeah…. We do. So how about we talk um… later?" "Later? When's later?" he asked. "Um… I don't know… later." She then held up a hand as the number she dialed started to ring. "Hello? Sandra! What are you doing there? You're going to baby sit Georgia tonight, remember? What? Why didn't you tell me sooner? You forgot… of course you did. Okay… I guess I'll just cancel my date. Yeah, you'd better make it up to me. Bye Sandra." Josie hanged up and sighed.
"What is it?" He asked, feeling his heart lift up at the possibility that her date wouldn't take place. Josie shook her head at him and walked out to the living room. "Noah… I can't go out tonight." She announced. Sam hid a smile as Noah's face fell. "Why?" "No baby sitter. Her mom went to a party so she has to stay at home to take care of her baby brother. I am so sorry." Anita stood up. "Why don't I stay here and take care of Georgia? I don't mind."
Josie shook her head. "I know that you and Gus has been looking forward to this night, so I can't accept that." Josie sighed and plopped down on the loveseat beside Noah. "I am so sorry. Can we reschedule?" Sam looked at Josie's disappointed face and before he could think, he blurted out, "Why don't I stay here and take care of Georgia? I don't mind."
'I don't mind? I don't mind? Now I'm letting her go out on dates? What is the matter with me?' he thought to himself.
"There Josie! Now you can go!" Anita said, smiling at him for the first time that night. "Oh no… you don't have to do that Sam. I can just stay here and take care of Georgia and besides you…" "Come on Josie. It's okay. I really don't mind. Besides, I really like Georgia, so I know that we're gonna have lots of fun." Sam assured her.
Josie met his eyes, as if asking him if it's really okay. He nodded and smiled. She smiled back and then stood up. "Georgia! Honey! Come in here please." Josie called out. Georgia came running and jumped on the sofa. "Yeah?" "Sam is going to be the one to stay with you tonight. Is that okay?" Georgia let out a squeal as she ran towards Sam and wrapped her arms around his legs.
"Yes Josie! I like Sam!" Sam laughed and scooped the little girl into his arms. "Really?" "Yeah! Go on Josie! We'll be fine here." Georgia assured her. "Okay. That's great to hear. Um… guys?" She turned towards her friends. "Can you go to your cars already? I just have to talk to these two first, okay?" Anita, Gus and Noah nodded and they walked out of the house.
"Okay. So, what do I have to tell you two?" Sam watched as Josie went to the fridge and took out a Tupperware of something. "What's that?" Sam asked as he followed her. "Mac and cheese. It's Georgia's favorite dinner. So I baked a batch for tonight. Just heat it up and let her have her way with it. If you want, you can order a pizza. The money's in the cookie jar." Sam nodded as she pointed to the side of the kitchen.
"Her mom's bound to call tonight from Japan since it's morning there. Just explain who you are so that she wouldn't think that her daughter is with a stranger. Then let them talk. Um… what else?" Josie mused to herself. Sam couldn't help it, so, he started laughing. "What?" Josie asked. "Don't worry too much Josie. I can take care of Georgia, okay? Just have fun." He said, smiling.
'Have fun? Have fun? You actually want her to have fun?' his conscience asked him.
Josie smiled and then bent down to kiss Georgia. "Okay, sweetie. I'll be going now. Have fun with Sam tonight, okay?" "Yes, Josie. Don't worry. We'll have fun, won't we Sam?" Georgia asked as she grabbed Sam's hand. "Yes Georgia, we will. Now go, Josie." He urged even though deep inside, all he wanted to do was enfold her in his arms and kiss her senseless until they we're both out of breath.
"Okay, okay. I believe you guys. See you later then." Josie said as she slowly walked towards the door. She went outside and Sam was sure that she was going to close it when she suddenly turned around and gave him a big smile. "Thank you Sam." She said simply, and then she closed the door. "Your welcome Josie. More than welcome." He whispered as he headed back to the kitchen to fix them selves some dinner.
* * * "I had such a wonderful time tonight Noah." Josie said as she and Noah walked towards the front door of her apartment. "I had a really great time too Josie." Noah answered as they stopped in front of her door. "We should definitely do this again." He continued, as he smiled hopefully at her.
Josie smiled and nodded. "Definitely." "So, I guess this is good bye." She whispered. "Yeah." He then leaned towards her and kissed her gently on the cheek. She blushed as he leaned away. "Okay. Bye Noah." "Bye Jos." She waved at him and waited until he's in his car and slowly opened the door to her apartment.
* * * Sam slowly stood up, being careful not to wake Georgia up. He walked to the window and peeked through the curtain. 'Don't kiss… don't kiss… don't kiss…' he begged silently. He saw Noah lean towards Josie and kiss her on the cheek. 'At least it's only on the cheek.' He thought to himself.
"Okay. Bye Noah." He heard Josie say and he knew that it's time for him to go back to the sofa and pretend that he's asleep. He gently raised Georgia's head and placed it on his lap, then he closed his eyes, pretending that he's fast asleep. He heard the door creak and he squeezed his eyes tight.
"Sam… Sam. Wake up." Josie's sweet voice said and he felt her soft hand on his arm. He gradually opened his eyes and yawned. "Josie… I didn't know you're here already." He said sleepily. "Yeah. I'm here. Good evening." She whispered.
"I'll just take Georgia to her room." She said as she started to pick Georgia up. He stopped her and took Georgia into his arms. "I'll take her." He stood up as Georgia moaned. Josie smiled and leaned over to place a kiss on the little girl's cheek.
He softly inhaled, her peach blossoms scent filled his senses and her soft hair brushed his cheek. 'Oh Josie…' he moaned her name inwardly. He held his breath in fear that she'll move away, and when she did, that was the time that he started to breathe normally again.
"Come on Sam." She whispered as she led the way to Georgia's room. She opened the door and the night-light as he slowly laid Georgia down on her bed. As soon as Georgia was on bed, Josie gently tucked her in and the placed another kiss on her forehead. She gestured for him to follow her and they walked to the living room.
Josie stared at him. "Do you want some coffee?" she asked. "That sounds great Josie." He answered. He followed her to the kitchen and sat on a chair as he waited for his coffee.
A few minutes later, she placed a cup of coffee in front of him and little containers of cream and sugar. Uncomfortable silence filled the room as they sipped their coffees. Sam cleared his throat. "Josie… we really have to talk." He said. Josie sighed. "I know we do." "So… are you ready?"
"I guess so… come on, let's go to the living room. It's much comfortable there." She said as she stood up and went to the living room. "I'm ready to talk if you want to listen now, Josie." Sam said as he sat down on the sofa chair in front of the loveseat where she is now seated. "Go on."
* * * "Three years ago, I was about to go to the pitcher's mound, to kiss you, to show you that I do love you and that I have forgiven you after everything. But Lara came… and she told me something that I didn't believe at first." Sam started.
Josie nodded. "I'm listening." She said simply.
"She said that she's three months pregnant with my child. I wasn't really sure at first that the child was indeed mine, so I tried to dodge her to get to you. But she said that the child is really mine and that if I go to you that night, she will have the baby aborted, and I couldn't have that, whether the child is mine or not."
Josie swallowed, as the pain from three years ago resurfaced again. "So, even if I wanted to, I can't go to you that night, knowing that if I did, Lara would have the child killed. I know Lara she would do that. So, I went to New York that night with her."
"Why didn't you call me? Tell me what happened? I would have understood you Sam." She said as she squeezed her fists together to keep herself together. "I wanted to. But Lara wouldn't have it. Her threats we're very real. So after we landed in New York, we got married in a civil ceremony."
Josie just sat there in stony silence, as she waited for him to continue. "I tried to call you, but Lara had a really difficult pregnancy, so I was by her side everyday… until the child was born. Through those months of her pregnancy, you were the only one in my mind. I never stopped loving you Josie… and the fact that I have a child in Lara's stomach was the only thing that gave me the strength to stay there and not go crazy, even though I wasn't really sure if the child was really mine. Then, Rosalind came into the world, and I was so happy… because looking at her, I now know that she is indeed my child. She was the only one who gave me the strength to live… and the fact that one day… I'll get to see you again."
Josie stared at Sam as the words tumbled out of his mouth. "How can you say that you never stopped loving me after all those months… after all these years… when you never did try to contact me and even ask how I was… If I was still living… breathing… how can you expect me to believe that you love me?" she asked incredulously as she felt the tears escape from her eyelids.
"Please Josie. Please don't cry. I am so sorry… but Lara threatened me with divorce and the fact that she wouldn't ever let me see Rosalind ever again if I tried to contact you." He explained, his heart breaking with every tear that fell out of her eyes.
"Then, you shouldn't be here. Lara might find out and I don't want to be the reason if you lose your daughter." She replied. "Don't worry about that. My friends got me covered." Josie laughed bitterly. "Wow! That's nice to hear." She said derisively.
"Josie please… don't be like this. I am so sorry that I hurt you, but please understand. I can't afford to lose my daughter. I don't know if I can handle that." He pleaded. Josie nodded and brushed away her tears. "Then I suggest that you leave." Sam stood up and kneeled before her, taking her hands in his. "Please don't push me away Josie. I want you to understand everything…"
Josie pushed his hands away and went to the door. "Go now Sam. Please." She whispered. Sam nodded and he slowly went to the door. "I'm sorry Josie." He whispered as he went out. Josie closed the door and that's when she let the tears fall freely. "Sam…" she sobbed as she stared at his retreating form through the window.
She then leaned on the door and sank to the floor. She buried her face into her hands and cried. Josie then heard a soft knock on the door. She wiped her face dry and slowly opened the door. "Sam? What are you doing here?" "I left my jacket." He answered as he pointed to the jacket on her sofa.
Josie stared at the jacket and nodded. "I'll get it." She walked over to the sofa and grabbed the piece of clothing. "Here." She whispered as she reached out and handed him the jacket. Her eyes met his and Josie gasped at the intensity of his gaze.
He reached out and then to her surprise, instead of getting his jacket, he pulled her towards him and kissed her on the lips. "Sam…" She said in surprise as she tried to get away. He tightened his arms around her and kissed her sensually.
"Sam…" she said again, but this time, her voice was low and eager as he delved deeper into her mouth. She kissed him back then, knowing that she really didn't want to escape his mouth… his kisses… as she expressed all the yearning that she felt for him in the three years that they've been apart.
The world around her became hazy as she gave into the emotions inside her. Nothing mattered but Sam and his kisses… and the way that he's making her feel. She now realized what she had known for all her life. That Sam Coulson is the man that she's meant to kiss for the rest of her life.
The jacket fell to the floor as she ran her fingers through his hair. Sam moaned and shivered at her touch. He delved into her mouth, feeling as if he was drowning. He's never felt this way before. And he never ever want it to stop. Josie was simply the woman that he's supposed to be with for the rest of his life. Not Lara… not anybody else. His daughter faded into the background together with his wife's serious threats.
They we're falling into a whirlpool, and neither one of them don't want to escape it. She trembled as his hands ran impatiently through her hair, massaging her scalp and then rested at either side of her face. His hands then began to move away from her face, to her back, rubbing her and squashing her more against him.
As they parted, Josie and Sam both panted for breath and she backed away, her head reeling from the most passionate kiss that she has ever received, considering that this is her very first kiss, and it came from the man that she really wanted to be the one to give her that.
"Sam… We shouldn't be doing this… you're a married man…" she said as she raised a hand to her lips, as if feeling if the kiss really took place. Sam nodded and let out a breath. "Your right." He swallowed, his eyes still boring in hers. But she didn't protest when he closed the front door and grabbed her again, kissing her even more passionately than before.
Josie responded with equal fervor and didn't complain when Sam slowly backed her towards the sofa and laid her down. He kissed her persistently, and Josie felt his hunger, matching her own. "Oh Sam…" she groaned as his lips left hers and began its journey down her neck and then nibbled her earlobes, making her sigh. He left her earlobe and went back to her throat, kissing and sucking it.
A few moments later, impatience filled her being as she grabbed his face and brought his lips back to hers. Over and over, their lips and tongues would meet, as three years of pent up longing for each other resurfaced with a vengeance. "Josie…" she heard him moan and she knew right at that moment that what he said about him loving her was true.
She didn't know if that was a good thing, or a bad thing. Her conscience was telling her to stop this, that what they're doing is wrong, but her heart and her body was another story. Her hands explored his back and went inside his shirt to feel his broad chest as he kissed her lips, her eyes… her nose, her forehead, her neck, her earlobes and then back on her lips. She felt his muscles shudder under her warm hands.
"Sam…" she whispered as she tried weakly to push him away, to sit up and stop this. "Please Josie… just for tonight… just tonight…" he whispered against her neck. She sighed as she felt herself losing the battle. Her longing for Sam is eating her whole and if she didn't act on it right now… she just know that she'll go crazy wondering what would have happened if she did act on this desire that she's feeling.
"Yes…" she heard herself whisper. Sam looked up and smiled as he captured her lips again. Josie whimpered in pleasure. Their lips still joined, they slowly stood up and blindly made their way towards her bedroom. She fumbled with the doorknob, and Sam backed her up through her open door.
Finally, they stumbled onto her bed. She reveled on the feeling of Sam's weight on top of her. "Wait Jos…" He whispered and pulled reluctantly away. "What?" she asked. "Your pillows…" Josie giggled self-consciously. "You like to collect them huh?" "No, I make them." Sam stared at her.
"You never fail to amaze me, Josie Geller." He picked one up and looked at the stitches. "I love needle point… it's my favorite hobby." "Obviously!" He teased, gesturing at the big mountain of pillows. Josie rolled her eyes and sat up to push the pillows away. Sam eagerly helped her, and in a few moments, the bed was bare. Josie smiled as she slowly began to lie down. Sam followed her, and started to kiss her.
"Sam… this is wrong…" she breathed as his hands went to the zipper of her dress. "Please Josie… I love you… I want you… I need you…" he murmured as he slowly slid it down. She gasped as his hand made contact with her skin. "Oh… God…" she whispered as he kissed her throat and slowly eased down the straps of her dress.
Her hands went down to the bottom of his shirt and she tugged it up impatiently. She cried out in alarm when he broke away but Sam soothed her by smiling gently, and swiftly took off his shirt. Josie eyes glowed as she stared at him… he was like a god… so perfect. Her hands roamed his chest. "I love you Josie..." He whispered as he explored her mouth with his lips.
Josie closed her eyes as she finally gave in to the feelings of desire surging in her. Sam's hand rested on the opening of her bra at the back and he looked at her for her permission. She nodded and closed her eyes in bliss. He kissed her softly on the lips and started to unhook her bra. She was sucking his neck, when out of the blue; Rosalind's face appeared in her thoughts, making her stop her assault on Sam's neck.
She would lose her dad if they continued this and Lara would find out. She couldn't let that happen. "Sam… no…" she said aloud as she sat up and pushed his hands away. "Josie?" He asked, bewildered. "We can't do this Sam. You'll lose Rosalind." She explained. "Lara will never know…" He started. "And what? Be your mistress? I can't be that Sam. I can't be your mistress." Josie said forcefully as she stood up, secured her bra and zipped her dress back up.
Sam sat there on her bed, rubbing his face with his hand. "Please stand up." Josie said forcefully, even though deep inside, all she wanted to do was go back to his arms and be lost in his kisses. Sam nodded. He slowly stood up and put his shirt back on.
"I love you Josie, and that will never change. But you're right. I can't afford to lose Rosalind. She's my life." He said as he, at a snail's pace, walked out of her room. Josie followed him and resisted the urge to grab him and have him kiss her like that again. To go back to her bed and forget about everything… her thoughts… her beliefs… his daughter… Lara…
Sam placed his hand on the door and just when Josie was sure that he'd go out he grabbed her once again and braced her against the door, trapping her in his arms. "Sa…" She was cut off by his lips, which are now again, against hers. She couldn't help it, she kissed him back as she ran his fingers through his hair and rested it at the back of his neck.
Sam's hands ran all over her body and she felt as if she's on fire. Sam lowered his hands from the door and rested around her waist. Her hands ran down the side if his body, searching for his hands. Their hands finally met and their fingers intertwined and tightened.
She moaned against his mouth, never ever wanting him to stop. But Josie knew that she couldn't do this. That they couldn't do this. Releasing his hands, she placed it against his chest to stop his sensual assault. "Sam… you have to go." She whispered as she skirted around him. Sam breathed heavily and nodded.
"Nothing could ever happen between us Sam. You're a married man, and you also have a daughter. We can never see each other again." "But Josie…" "Please Sam. I fell in love with you before… and when you left me, my heart was so broken that I didn't know if I could ever be whole again. Now, I'm just starting to pick up the pieces, and here you are, throwing everything out of perspective. I couldn't afford this Sam." She said, as she backed away from him.
"What can't you afford, Josie?" he asked, stepping closer. "I can't afford falling in love with you all over again. Please, don't make me fall in love with you again. I don't think I can handle all the pain that comes with it." She begged. Sam nodded sadly and backed away.
He opened the door and before he walked towards his car, he stared at her. "Goodbye Josie. I love you. Always remember that." He whispered. Josie stared at him until he got into his car and drove away. She closed the door and turned off all the lights as she walked slowly towards her room. She changed into her favorite pair of pajamas and lay down on the bed.
The bed where he laid her down… and made her feel the feelings that she never thought she'll ever feel. Her skin still burned from his touch. Her lips tingling from his kisses. She raised a hand to her lips. She knew that sleep wouldn't visit her soon.
After everything that has happened, she won't be surprised if she didn't fall asleep ever again.
* * * Sam sat on Jon and Joanah's front lawn after driving from Josie's house. He knew that he and Rosie have to go home before Lara does, or else she might suspect of something. But right now, he didn't care. All he wanted to do was go back to Josie's place and kiss her again and again… like what he did earlier. He raised a hand to his lips.
The kisses that they shared were nothing like he ever dreamed of. Josie's lips… wow… was everything he ever thought it would be and more. It was soft and luscious... totally and utterly kissable. And her skin… it was so soft to touch… he's aching to touch it again… actually, what he wanted to do right now was to make love to Josie until the morning.
He's never wanted anything more in his entire life. Kissing her and feeling her respond that way to him was more than he can possibly take… and it made him want to do more… something that they almost did that night. But Josie's right. They should never see each other ever again. He'll lose Rosie if they did… and even though it hurts… he just has to deal with it.
