title: Summer Lessons
chapter 9: Apprehensions
author: Raven Dancer

disclaimer: All characters property of JK Rowling with the exceptions of the Drs. Barnes. I receive no monetary compensation for these works.

Snape breathed in deeply; the clean scent of the ocean tickled his nose and caused him to smile. He knew exactly where he was: Albus' summer home.

Still, he did not open his eyes choosing to enjoy the feeling of safety for a few more moments. Once he opened his eyes he knew Jeffrey Barnes would be on him wanting to discuss his .

He was feeling fine, thank you very much! He had no desire to think about what had happened. He preferred denial for a little while longer. A space of perfect calm before one or another person demanded he remember.

Of course simply thinking brought back fractured images. The flash of his hand being crushed under a heavy black boot came unbidden and he jerked his hand slightly. The resulting pain confirmed he was hurt.

Breathe! Snape slowly sucked in deep lungfuls of air blowing them out steadily just as Jeffrey Barnes had taught him. He would not panic!

Another image came into focus slowly. On the floor propped into place by a splintered bench. While Lucius moved behind him...

This was too much. Snape's eyes flew open and frantically searched the room. His room at Albus' cottage. Smooth cotton sheets. Light blanket. Feather pillow. Warm sunlight. Draco Malfoy... Draco Malfoy?

With strength he did not possess Snape pushed up and off the bed landing in a confused heap of sheets and pain. He summoned all his scattered strength trying to bring himself upright. Or as upright as he could manage given that his leg would not bear his weight.

James Barnes exclaimed as he entered the room. Jerking around to face the Healer the Potions Master's leg gave out and he collapsed onto the floor. The elder Healer was on the floor trying to get his patient to calm, or at least still, before he did any more damage to himself.

Severus, shhh.... You're safe! Listen to me... See me!
It's just Dr. James... sshhh... Barnes deep voice rumbled over the words.

Recognition was slow in coming but after a few moments being held down by the Healer's long heavy frame Snape did stop struggling. The calm voice continued to pour over his trembling body until he focused on it. Now the distraught man listened, eyes tightly closed, intently placing the voice.

he asked weakly. The Healer smiled and loosened his grip.

Yes Severus, it's James. You're perfectly safe at Albus'
home, Barnes soothed as he carefully released his twitching patient. He ran his hand over Snape's cropped hair and face feeding in a little energy to keep him focused.

I know seeing Draco startled you, Barnes continued monitoring his patient. Snape jerked at the mention of the name but did not struggle any longer.

the Potions Master managed, I wasn't expecting
seeing Mister m-Malfoy here.

Draco was hurt, Severus, James said purposefully NOT saying the wizard's surname.
Albus found him and wouldn't leave him behind.

Snape thought on this a long moment before sighing heavily.
No, I don't suppose Albus would. He's rather protective. Now the Healer chuckled.

Yes, he's a big softie that Headmaster... Barnes' touch changed as he began to evaluate his patient bit by bit.
And Draco's been very worried about you Severus. That's
why he was sitting near your bed. He's been helping watch
over you while you slept.

That piece of information was mulled over and digested. Finally Snape opened his eyes and looked at the pleasant face near his. Shamelessly the hurt man raised his uninjured hand and touched his Healer reassuring himself the man was real. Then he glanced at the bed.

his voice shook slightly but he chose to ignore it.
Are you still here?

Lower legs appeared, barefoot and slightly hairy. Then knees and finally the young wizard's teary face came into Snape's line of sight.

Good morning Professor Snape, Malfoy's voice was steady but his face reflected his emotional turmoil. The Potions Master simply held out his left hand which was quickly grasped by the youth.

Well, Severus, I don't know about you but I think it's rather
uncomfortable down here, Barnes said conversationally. This drew his patient's dwindling attention back to him.
I think perhaps a bath and clean pajamas are in order.

Snape considered this a moment, his fingers tightening and then releasing Malfoy's hand.

Yes, I haven't bathed lately, the Potions Master agreed.

Draco was sent off to start the water as Barnes prepared his patient. First a long drink of sunlast then the Healer's gentle touches helped calm Snape before clothing was removed and a light blanket wrapped around his body.

Although he and Jeffrey had healed all the open cuts and gashes, the wizard's body was still battered and bruised. Internal damages had been set to right, but bones were still not completely mended. It would take several more intense healing sessions to put the hand back together.

Levitating his patient Barnes flicked the dirty clothing into the corner for Dobby. Bedding, too, was left disheveled for the house elf. They moved down the uncharacteristically silent hall to the washroom. Snape was considering the quiet. Where was Albus?

Hullo Professor Snape, a familiar voice piped up. With considerable effort the wizard focused on Harry Potter. He wondered about the salutation for a moment. Considered questioning the use of his formal name, considered returning the greeting.

It required too much effort.

They reached the washroom. With a sigh he waited, still levitated by the Healer's spell. A flurry of movement solidified into Malfoy as he left the small room. The youth's hand tentatively touched the Potions Master's shoulder before disappearing entirely.

As he was moved further in Snape found himself above the bathtub. Another movement and another familiar face slipped into his line of vision.

Hi Severus!, Remus Lupin's cheerful voice centered him. Snape managed to smile. He sighed softly as he was lowered into the fragrant water: Lupin's and Barnes' hands guiding him gently.

Nothing like good ol' soap and water to clean, Barnes remarked as he watched his patient settle into the warmth. He'd been spelled clean many times in the past four days but the gritty misery had clung to his skin and hair. Both James and his son Jeffrey had wanted to clean him properly.

Snape once more began looking about. He could see both the Healer and the DADA professor. But he was missing...

Snape asked uncertainly.

He's here, Severus. I'll send for him, Barnes offered as he glanced at Lupin.

It might take a few minutes, Lupin hedged. The Headmaster was being inconvenienced by a certain animagus. That they were not still screaming at each other meant Harry and Draco had taken control of the situation. With a gentle stroke of the back of his fingers over Snape's face Lupin stood and left the washroom.

The werewolf stepped into the hallway and carefully walked down to the study. The tension in the room was palpable; the Headmaster exchanging glares with Sirius Black. Across the room Harry and Draco stood close obviously supporting each other against the anger being generated.

They'd reached a tentative agreement in the days following Snape's rescue. They were mere pawns in the very adult confrontations between the Headmaster and their respective parents and guardians.

Lupin crossed the room and stood calmly behind the boys. He placed a hand on each one's shoulder before facing the center of the storm.

Albus? Severus is asking for you, he said smoothly. He ignored the scowl that formed on Black's face as he continued.
I can help you pack Siri. You should probably get going.
You need to get to Roanoke by early evening eastern US
time.

When there was no movement from the combatants Lupin sighed and gave each boy an affectionate squeeze. He then went to Dumbledore's desk and sat down shuffling the papers. From the various scattered stacks he assembled several sheets and put them in a plain file folder. This was charmed shut and set on the side of the desk.

I've put in the letters for the council, Albus. Siri, you know
you'll be there at least a fortnight waiting for responses.
There are many interesting muggle places nearby and the
beach is quite nice, Lupin took control of the shattered situation.
You have the Gringott's debit card so you can shop in the
city. Jeffrey has left some muggle currency for the United
States and you can get more at any of the atm machines
the muggle banks have. Remember the pin?

Black grunted. Yes Remus, I recall the clever little
nemonic you came up with... How could I forget?

Lupin said brusquely ignoring the voice laden with sarcasm.
Let's get you packed. He looked at the two boys.
Would you please clean the kitchen and heat some broth
for Professor Snape?
The two younger wizards left with hardly a grumble about being reduced to house elves. Lupin finished by directing Dumbledore down the hall to the washroom. With the room cleared he centered his attention on his best friend.

Come on Siri, he said with a gentle smile and a hand on the animagus' shoulder. Black looked at Lupin, his gaze considering. After a long moment he turned fully to face him.

Remus? Why are you so perfect? he asked in all seriousness. Lupin thought on the question before looking his friend in the eye.

I'm not perfect, he said, eyes sparkling with mischief.
You're just waaaay more dysfunctional...

And what do you call that little monthly changeroo you
do? Black snapped back, but there was no anger behind the words.

I consider that more of a cyclical personality quirk, not
dysfunction, Lupin threw back as he moved to the door. It was easy to fall back into the banter, the friendship was sound even when they were hurt and tired. At odds.

Quirk? Fur sprouting down your back and a snout that
puts Jimmy Durante to shame? A quirk?? Black snorted derisively. But he followed his best friend, a hand on the werewolf's shoulder.

Yes, quirk. Compared to your constant inane, childish
behaviors, it's a quirk most definitely, Lupin continued as they walked down the hallway to their room.

Fangs! I don't think fangs are a quirk... Black's voice faded as they passed the doorway into the bedroom.


The Headmaster stood on the tile just inside the washroom door and looked at the Healer working on his friend. His child. A washcloth thick with suds was working over arms, fingers, gentle in between the still-broken digits. James was singing to his patient, a warm comforting noise in comparison to Black's harsh tones.

Again Dumbledore fought down his anger. He was having a difficult time letting it go this time! The selfishness and possessiveness of that wizard was beyond compare!

Albus is here, Severus, Barnes said a bit more loudly snapping the older wizard's internal concentration. Unable to have enough time to calm himself Dumbledore moved across the tile to the tub and stood looking down at both the Healer and the Potions Master.

Snape peered up at his mentor. For a man so aware of every nuance of posture and expression the Potions Master could only read the anger and disdain in Dumbledore. He had no way of knowing that anger was for someone else. Lowering his eyes the ill man collapsed into himself embracing the dark silence.

He missed the transformation as Dumbledore shook off the fury and relaxed his body. It would do no good to be upset here! Unaware of the damage done the Headmaster transformed the hamper into a stool and sat next to the tub, his hand automatically reaching out to touch the expressionless face.

Barnes saw all of the wordless interplay and silently cursed. His patient had removed himself without losing consciousness. He knew no matter what was said the Potions Master had damned himself into depression.

But Barnes was determined to try!

Did Siri get going? James asked. Immediately Dumbledore jerked as did Snape.

the Headmaster said flatly. Siri is off to Roanoke.

Seemed a little tense between you two, James pursued as he moved the washcloth over Snape's torso. He could tell Snape was listening carefully even if he appeared distant.

Dumbledore stared at the Healer before answering.

Siri and I had a disagreement on his errand. He wanted
Harry to join him but the boy refused, the Headmaster ground out.
As did I! It's not a lark! Harry is very vulnerable right now
and Siri cannot protect him adequately. Even if Lupin went
too I would not feel secure.

You just seem a bit stressed... James shamelessly led him on.

Dumbledore agreed. He gently stroked Snape's face trying to elicit a response.
Sirius upset me greatly. He can be very self-absorbed and
doesn't seem to understand Harry and Severus are in
great danger. He just wants to please himself...

Snape's eyes finally opened and looked up again at his mentor. Dumbledore's face lit up with a warm smile although he was troubled by the uncertainty in the ill wizard's eyes.

Hullo child. I'm very glad you are awake! I'll bet the bath
feels good, the Headmaster enthused. The dark eyes bore into his blue searching for more. Bending close Dumbledore kissed Snape's forehead.

I have been very worried. You slept a long time, the older wizard continued. He moved slightly so that Barnes could wash his head and the remains of his hair. Dumbledore wondered if his friend was aware of the short style he now sported.

Still Snape did not answer. He was exhausted, no matter how much sleep he'd had. Albus seemed happy to be with him, seemed to care for him. The anger was gone from the wizard's body. Another sigh and the Potions Master leaned into Barnes' massaging fingers.

I could still sleep, Snape managed, voice still raspy.

Your body is healing Severus. You need a lot of sleep, Barnes interjected.
You also need to eat.

Harry and Draco are getting some broth... Dumbledore offered.

Ah, excellent! House elves in training! Barnes snickered.

Now Snape smiled, his eyes sliding closed to keep the soap out. He was still unsure of his standing with Dumbledore, especially knowing that he had been wrong and had been captured. Captured, tortured and used. But Dr. James he was very sure of; the Healer always took care of him. Snape knew that Barnes would not be there if he did not want to be.

Well, Albus would also be there no matter what had happened. He might be disappointed, but he still loved Severus. Finally coming to that conclusion he reached his good hand up to hold onto his friend.

The Healer sighed as the tension bled from his patient's body. The internal struggle had been won. He made a mental note to discuss this interplay between Snape and Dumbledore with Jeffrey.

The Headmaster sent a thin stream of energy into the Potions Master. The sparkling light of Albus Dumbledore. Snape moaned softly as it warmed him in ways he could not explain.