Chapter 7: The Gorons
(Link and Navi have finally arrived at Kakariko village, the beginning of the Death Mountain Trail).
Navi: Lets get started up the trail.
Link: Navi. I see where the trail begins but there is a gate blocking the way up.
Navi: I wonder why that is.
Link: I don't know. Lets ask that guard standing near it if he can open it for us. I'm sure he'll understand.
(A few minutes later)
Guard: BWAHAHAHA! You want me to open this gate? I don't understand why you want me to do such a thing.
Link: Well. Princess Zelda sent me down here so I can talk to the Gorons.
Guard: Yea right Kid. Very few people have actually met Zelda. The only way you can get passed this gate is if you get permission from royalty.
Navi: Hey Link. Show him the note that Zelda wrote for you.
Link: Oh right. I almost forgot about that. (hands the guard the letter).
Guard: (reading the letter out loud) Dear Mr. Guard. Link is under my command to save mine and the people of Hyrule's asses from an evil man who is [undoubtedly] going to take over the kingdom someday. Let him pass or else. Love Zelda.
Link: My that girl has a way with words.
Guard: I guess I'll have to let you pass. (steps on a button nearby and the gate opens). By the way,. It would be wise to get a bigger and stronger shield before you start on up. I recommend you get another.
Link: Great. Now we have to go all the way back to Hyrule.
Navi: Actually. I heard that there is a shield hidden under a tombstone in the graveyard in this town.
Link: Really? Where did you hear that?
Navi: The voices in my head.
Link: I see. Um. Lets go then.
(Link and Navi head on over to the Kakariko Cemetery. While they are there they move each tombstone until they come across one that is hiding the shield. They come back to the Death mountain trail and begin their way up the path).
Link: Wow. This is a pretty tough climb. Don't you agree Navi.
Navi: It doesn't make any difference to me considering that I can fly.
Link: (grumbling) Lucky.
Navi: Link. I would watch where you are going.
Link: Why? I'm not going to get lost. (gets ran over by a goron rolling down the hill). Ouchie.
Navi: I told you.
Link: Ugh.
Navi: I think I see the entrance to Goron City.
Link: (stands up). I see it to. Shall we go in?
Navi: After you.
Link: (walks into Goron city) Wow. This is an interesting place.
Navi: Lets just get the spiritual stone and leave already. We already wasted a lot of time talking to Malon and Saria.
Link: Alright. Lets look for the leader. (pokes a nearby Goron in the side) Take me to your leader.
Navi: LINK! Don't be so rude! I'm sorry. But can you be so kind to tell us where your leader is?
Goron: Ah. You must mean Big Brother. He has shut himself up in his room. He says he won't come out until the King's royal messenger arrives.
Link: Royal messenger?
Goron: Yea. Us Gorons are in trouble. Did you see that cave towards the base of death mountain? It was being blocked by a giant rock.
Navi: Well we did see a giant rock. It was next to a sign. Said something about Dodongo's Cavern.
Goron: Yes. That's it. Well. We used to harvest our food there. But the Dodongos came and took over the cave. Then an evil man came and blocked the entrance to the cave so we couldn't get in. Now we are going to starve to death.
Link: What did you harvest in there?
Goron: Rocks.
Navi: You eat rocks??
Goron: Errr yea. They're delicious.
Link: Where is your leader?
Goron: He's in his room. He locked himself in there. He said not to let anyone bother him. He also said he wont' come out until Hyrule's royal messenger arrives.
Navi: Why the hell is he hiding out?
Goron: who knows.
Link: Thank you. I think we'll bother him anyways. It's really important.
(Link and Navi walk to the bottom center of Goron city and finds the room where the Goron leader is. Unfortunately the door is locked).
Link: Great. Another obstacle.
Navi: Hmmm. The leader said he is waiting for the royal messenger. Why don't you play Zelda's Lullaby on your ocarina. Maybe he'll think you are royalty and open up.
Link: Alright. (plays Zelda's Lullaby)
(And Walla! The door opens).
Link: Hey. It worked.
Navi: Of course it did. Now go!
Link: (enters through the door way and sees a large goron with his back to him). Um Hello?
Leader Goron: (turns around. His mouth is obviously stuffed with something). Hphm?
Link: Uh Hi. You aren't eating anything are you? I heard that you all are starving.
Leader Goron: (swallows food) It was just a little bit.
Link: You ought to be ashamed of yourself! Your people are starving and you are sneaking in food!
Leader goron: (turns red) Well. Wait a minute!! Who are you? I heard the royal family's song and was expecting someone more important to come in!
Link: I AM important!
LG: Really now? I am highly offended. Are my people and I not good enough for the King? It's already bad enough that he kept putting off helping us.
Link: I'm not the messenger! Why are you so grumpy anyways?
LG: Why am I grumpy you ask? My people are starving. A man of the desert is after my spiritual stone. Dodongos have taken over the area where my people harvest their food And you are asking me why I'm grumpy?!?!?!
Link: (whispering to Navi) Perhaps I shouldn't tell him why we're here yet.
Navi: That would be wise.
LG: Why are you whispering? Are you talking about me?
Link: Maybe I should give Saria a call on the ocarina to ask her advice.
Navi: Why? Doesn't mine matter?
Link: (plays Saria's song).
Navi: (pokes Link) Look!
(Link looks where Navi is pointing and sees the Big Goron Leader dancing to Saria's song).
Navi: (disbelief) I think he likes it.
Link: Well I was the one who played it.
LG: (dancing to the song) Ooh yea! Catchy!
Link: I hope he doesn't kill us.
LG: (stops dancing) Wow! What a great song! It's like all of my problems were washed away! I am Darunia. Leader of the Gorons.
Link: Hi. I'm link. Leader of the Kokiri.
Navi: You are not!
Link: (flicks Navi) Shush!
Daurnia: What can I help you with?
Link: I need the Spiritual stone.
Daurnia: You mean the Goron's Ruby? I'm sorry. But in order for me to give that to you. You will need to prove yourself worthy.
Link: Not again!
Daurnia: If you want it so badly then you can go destroy the Dodongos that have taken over our cave.
Link: What are dodongos?
Daurnia: Fire breathing dinosaurs.
Link: I guess I can do that. But only if you give me the stone.
Daurnia: If you succeed. I have something that may help you. (hands Link a bracelet).
Link: Oh wow! A bracelet. Just what I always wanted.
Daurnia: That's no ordinary bracelet. That bracelet makes you stronger. You can use it to pick up the Goron's special crop.
Link: Pot?
Daurina: NO! Bombs.
Link: (sadly) oh.
Daurina: Don't worry. In order to get into the cavern you need to blow up the rock.
Link: Ooooh. I can blow stuff up?
Daurina: Of course. And if you survive then I will greet you at the entrance of the cavern.
Navi: Thanks. We'll be heading on down now.
(Link and Navi head out of Goron City and walk to the ledge to peer down at the large boulder blocking the cave).
Navi: Link. I think I see the "special crop."
Link: Where? I don't see any.
Navi: (points to a bomb shaped plant). Pick it up.
Link: (picks up the bomb flower)
Navi: THROW IT YOU NIMROD BEFORE IT EXPLODES!
Link: But it's so pretty.
Navi: WHO CARES?! IF YOU DON'T THROW IT THEN WE'LL BOTH END UP DEAD!!
Link: Alright alright. You don't need to be so bitchy about it. (throws the bomb at the boulder and watches it explode and open the cave entrance).
Navi: GOOD! Now. Lets get down there and kick some dodongo butt!!
(Link and Navi have finally arrived at Kakariko village, the beginning of the Death Mountain Trail).
Navi: Lets get started up the trail.
Link: Navi. I see where the trail begins but there is a gate blocking the way up.
Navi: I wonder why that is.
Link: I don't know. Lets ask that guard standing near it if he can open it for us. I'm sure he'll understand.
(A few minutes later)
Guard: BWAHAHAHA! You want me to open this gate? I don't understand why you want me to do such a thing.
Link: Well. Princess Zelda sent me down here so I can talk to the Gorons.
Guard: Yea right Kid. Very few people have actually met Zelda. The only way you can get passed this gate is if you get permission from royalty.
Navi: Hey Link. Show him the note that Zelda wrote for you.
Link: Oh right. I almost forgot about that. (hands the guard the letter).
Guard: (reading the letter out loud) Dear Mr. Guard. Link is under my command to save mine and the people of Hyrule's asses from an evil man who is [undoubtedly] going to take over the kingdom someday. Let him pass or else. Love Zelda.
Link: My that girl has a way with words.
Guard: I guess I'll have to let you pass. (steps on a button nearby and the gate opens). By the way,. It would be wise to get a bigger and stronger shield before you start on up. I recommend you get another.
Link: Great. Now we have to go all the way back to Hyrule.
Navi: Actually. I heard that there is a shield hidden under a tombstone in the graveyard in this town.
Link: Really? Where did you hear that?
Navi: The voices in my head.
Link: I see. Um. Lets go then.
(Link and Navi head on over to the Kakariko Cemetery. While they are there they move each tombstone until they come across one that is hiding the shield. They come back to the Death mountain trail and begin their way up the path).
Link: Wow. This is a pretty tough climb. Don't you agree Navi.
Navi: It doesn't make any difference to me considering that I can fly.
Link: (grumbling) Lucky.
Navi: Link. I would watch where you are going.
Link: Why? I'm not going to get lost. (gets ran over by a goron rolling down the hill). Ouchie.
Navi: I told you.
Link: Ugh.
Navi: I think I see the entrance to Goron City.
Link: (stands up). I see it to. Shall we go in?
Navi: After you.
Link: (walks into Goron city) Wow. This is an interesting place.
Navi: Lets just get the spiritual stone and leave already. We already wasted a lot of time talking to Malon and Saria.
Link: Alright. Lets look for the leader. (pokes a nearby Goron in the side) Take me to your leader.
Navi: LINK! Don't be so rude! I'm sorry. But can you be so kind to tell us where your leader is?
Goron: Ah. You must mean Big Brother. He has shut himself up in his room. He says he won't come out until the King's royal messenger arrives.
Link: Royal messenger?
Goron: Yea. Us Gorons are in trouble. Did you see that cave towards the base of death mountain? It was being blocked by a giant rock.
Navi: Well we did see a giant rock. It was next to a sign. Said something about Dodongo's Cavern.
Goron: Yes. That's it. Well. We used to harvest our food there. But the Dodongos came and took over the cave. Then an evil man came and blocked the entrance to the cave so we couldn't get in. Now we are going to starve to death.
Link: What did you harvest in there?
Goron: Rocks.
Navi: You eat rocks??
Goron: Errr yea. They're delicious.
Link: Where is your leader?
Goron: He's in his room. He locked himself in there. He said not to let anyone bother him. He also said he wont' come out until Hyrule's royal messenger arrives.
Navi: Why the hell is he hiding out?
Goron: who knows.
Link: Thank you. I think we'll bother him anyways. It's really important.
(Link and Navi walk to the bottom center of Goron city and finds the room where the Goron leader is. Unfortunately the door is locked).
Link: Great. Another obstacle.
Navi: Hmmm. The leader said he is waiting for the royal messenger. Why don't you play Zelda's Lullaby on your ocarina. Maybe he'll think you are royalty and open up.
Link: Alright. (plays Zelda's Lullaby)
(And Walla! The door opens).
Link: Hey. It worked.
Navi: Of course it did. Now go!
Link: (enters through the door way and sees a large goron with his back to him). Um Hello?
Leader Goron: (turns around. His mouth is obviously stuffed with something). Hphm?
Link: Uh Hi. You aren't eating anything are you? I heard that you all are starving.
Leader Goron: (swallows food) It was just a little bit.
Link: You ought to be ashamed of yourself! Your people are starving and you are sneaking in food!
Leader goron: (turns red) Well. Wait a minute!! Who are you? I heard the royal family's song and was expecting someone more important to come in!
Link: I AM important!
LG: Really now? I am highly offended. Are my people and I not good enough for the King? It's already bad enough that he kept putting off helping us.
Link: I'm not the messenger! Why are you so grumpy anyways?
LG: Why am I grumpy you ask? My people are starving. A man of the desert is after my spiritual stone. Dodongos have taken over the area where my people harvest their food And you are asking me why I'm grumpy?!?!?!
Link: (whispering to Navi) Perhaps I shouldn't tell him why we're here yet.
Navi: That would be wise.
LG: Why are you whispering? Are you talking about me?
Link: Maybe I should give Saria a call on the ocarina to ask her advice.
Navi: Why? Doesn't mine matter?
Link: (plays Saria's song).
Navi: (pokes Link) Look!
(Link looks where Navi is pointing and sees the Big Goron Leader dancing to Saria's song).
Navi: (disbelief) I think he likes it.
Link: Well I was the one who played it.
LG: (dancing to the song) Ooh yea! Catchy!
Link: I hope he doesn't kill us.
LG: (stops dancing) Wow! What a great song! It's like all of my problems were washed away! I am Darunia. Leader of the Gorons.
Link: Hi. I'm link. Leader of the Kokiri.
Navi: You are not!
Link: (flicks Navi) Shush!
Daurnia: What can I help you with?
Link: I need the Spiritual stone.
Daurnia: You mean the Goron's Ruby? I'm sorry. But in order for me to give that to you. You will need to prove yourself worthy.
Link: Not again!
Daurnia: If you want it so badly then you can go destroy the Dodongos that have taken over our cave.
Link: What are dodongos?
Daurnia: Fire breathing dinosaurs.
Link: I guess I can do that. But only if you give me the stone.
Daurnia: If you succeed. I have something that may help you. (hands Link a bracelet).
Link: Oh wow! A bracelet. Just what I always wanted.
Daurnia: That's no ordinary bracelet. That bracelet makes you stronger. You can use it to pick up the Goron's special crop.
Link: Pot?
Daurina: NO! Bombs.
Link: (sadly) oh.
Daurina: Don't worry. In order to get into the cavern you need to blow up the rock.
Link: Ooooh. I can blow stuff up?
Daurina: Of course. And if you survive then I will greet you at the entrance of the cavern.
Navi: Thanks. We'll be heading on down now.
(Link and Navi head out of Goron City and walk to the ledge to peer down at the large boulder blocking the cave).
Navi: Link. I think I see the "special crop."
Link: Where? I don't see any.
Navi: (points to a bomb shaped plant). Pick it up.
Link: (picks up the bomb flower)
Navi: THROW IT YOU NIMROD BEFORE IT EXPLODES!
Link: But it's so pretty.
Navi: WHO CARES?! IF YOU DON'T THROW IT THEN WE'LL BOTH END UP DEAD!!
Link: Alright alright. You don't need to be so bitchy about it. (throws the bomb at the boulder and watches it explode and open the cave entrance).
Navi: GOOD! Now. Lets get down there and kick some dodongo butt!!