Chapter 9: Pain and torment.
(Link and Navi walked into the blue warp that appeared after beating King Dodongo. A minute later they reappear outside of Dodongos Cavern. Link is pretty bruised up. He is covered in blood and looks exhausted).
Link: We need more warps like those. I hate having to walk everywhere.
Navi: You're the hero in this story. You're not supposed to be lazy.
Link: Do you hear that noise?
Navi: What noise? I don't hear anything.
Link: You know that high pitched noise you hear in cartoons that represents something falling from the sky?
Navi: Yes.
Link: It sounds like that.
Navi: But this isn't a cartoon.
CRASH!! BANG!
(Suddenly, Daurnia lands directly in front of Link. Other gorons do that same).
Daurnia: I must say that I am impressed. A scrawny kid like you beating up all of those dodongos.
Link: HEY!
Daurnia: You know what kid? I think I like you.
Link: I prefer to date my own species.
Daurnia: That's not what I mean you little perv. Anyways.how about you and I become sworn brothers?
Link: Brothers? Does it involve a big ceremony.
Daurnia: No. Of course not. That's too much trouble.
Link: Alright then.
Daurnia: Great!
Link: (coughs)
Daurnia: Ah yes. I promised you the spiritual stone. (holds up his arms and a red stone suddenly appears in front of Link).
Link: That's pretty. (grabs the stone).
Daurnia: I can't believe how suddenly all of the dodongos came. There were many of them. We couldn't protect our cave from them. It was the fault of the desert man, Ganondorf. He blocked the cave from us and said that the would remove the boulder only if I gave him the spiritual stone.
Link: (shocked) That asshole!
Daurnia: Yes. Anyways. The problem is solved! We can go back to our cave and eat the delicious rocks.
Link: Errr. Yummy.
Daurnia: You look a little beat up brother. I suggest you visit the great fairy on top of the mountain. She'll make you good as new.
Navi: (mumbles some angry words).
Link: Okay. Thanks. We'll do that.
Daurnia: (talking to the gorons surrounding Link) Why don't you all give your thanks to our new Sworn Brother!
Goron1: You did great!
Goron2: That was awesome.
Goron3: I never seen such a small person beat up a large dinosaur before.
Goron4: Give us hug!
All Gorons: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUG!!
Link: (pales) Ohlookatthetimeigottago! (runs away screaming)
Gorons: (chasing after Link) HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG!!
Link: AIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Gorons: COME BACK HERE AND GIVE US A HUG!!
(It is dusk and Navi and Link are almost near the top of the mountain).
Navi: Be careful Link. There are several hot rocks flying around. Try not to get hit.
Link: (keeps getting hit by large rocks) OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!
Navi: Run boy run!
Link: (runs and dodges the flying rocks)
Navi: Phew. We are out of the line of danger now. All we have to do is climb the large Cliffside in front of us.
Link: I should probably kill the Skulltulas first.
Navi: Yea. They might charge at you and make you fall.
Link: (kills the Skulltulas and climbs the Cliffside to the top).
Navi: Oh goddesses.
Link: What's wrong Navi? (looks in the direction where Navi is looking) RUN FOR IT NAVI!
Kaepora Gaebora: Hello there Link. Here I am again. Still stalking you.
Link: WHY?!
KG: Because I love it! I take it you are here to see the Great Fairy. She can supply you with a new ability.
Link: Where is she?
KG: You have to figure that out on your own.
Link: Why?
KG: I don't wanna tell you.
Navi: Link. There is a wall that looks like it's about to fall apart. (points)
Link: YAY! I get to blow some more stuff up!(gets out a bomb and throws it at the wall).
Navi: (covers ears)
KABOOM!!
Link:Hmmmm. (looks at KG mischievously)
Navi: Sorry Link. We're not allowed to kill the people who are considered the good guys in this story.
Link: (sadly) awwwww.
KG: (snickers)
Link: (walking into the newly made door) Do you know this great fairy Navi?
Navi: (snorts) Yes. I went to high school with her.
Link: I take it that you don't like her.
Navi: She was such a bitch. She always made fun of the way I dressed (sniffles).
Link: Awwww. You dress really pretty Navi. (gives her a hug).
Navi: Thank you Link. You're sweet.
Link: How do we get this fairy's attention?
Navi: Stand on the triforce that is painted into the ground. Then play Zelda's Lullaby.
Link: (does that) Well? Nothing happened.
Voice: WAHAHAHA!!
Link: (gulps) What was that?
(The owner of the voice comes from the pool of water that is right in front of Link and Navi).
Link: (whispers to Navi) Weren't there rumors that she was beautiful?
Navi: (Stares at GF) She used to be but now she's
Link: UGLY!
GF: Hello Link. I am the Great Fairy of magic. I understand you are here for something.
Navi: Depends on what you mean?
GF: Ah Navi. Still wearing that dull outfit I see?
Navi: Of course your prettiness! (does a curtsy).
GF: I know I'm pretty. Everyone is soooooo jealous of me.
Link: (tries not to laugh).
GF: Anyways Link. I'm going to give you a new skill. It is called The Spin Attack
Link: What is that?
GF: It is when you charge up your sword and after it is charged, you spin and you hit many enemies with your blade filled with magic.
Link: Ooooooooh. Sounds neat. Give it to me!
GF: (holds her hands up and a magic beam surrounds Link).
Link: (drowsy) That fairy is starting to look awfully hot.
Navi: (smacks Link) Snap out of it!
Link: Sorry.
GF: All done. When you get weak and weary from battle please come back and see me. I can heal your wounds.
Link: Okay. Thank you.
GF: Nice seeing you again Navi.
Navi: Same to you, your highness!
(Link and Navi being to head back out of the cave).
Link: Why were you so sweet with her? I thought you hated her.
Navi: Because.she is the Queen of Fairies. So that means that I have to be
Link: Don't say it!!
Navi: NICE! (sobs)
Link: (gives Navi a hug) Don't worry. We won't have to go through the pain and torment anymore.
Navi: Don't forget that KG is out there.
Link: Dammit! You're right! Maybe we won't ever see him again.
Navi: Right. Whatever. Lets just get this over with.
Link: (walks out of the cave and heads for KG).
Navi: LINK! What are you doing??
Link: Hey KG! You are no longer the most annoying character in the game anymore.
Navi: WHAT?!
KG: Really? (Begins to cry) That's all I ever wanted! Just some love.
Link: Awww. I feel bad now.
KG: Who is the new annoying character?
Link: The great fairy.
KG: I see. I'm still going to stalk you like there is no tomorrow.
Link: (snaps fingers) damn!
KG: Wanna ride down to Kakariko village?
Link: Um sure.
KG: (flies off the perch he is resting on and picks Link up)
Link: You won't drop me will you?
KG: (grins evilly at Link and beings to fly down to the village).
Link: AIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!
KG: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Link: Oh goddesses. Why didn't I just walk down?!
Navi: Because you're stupid!
KG: Here we are!
Link: Great! You can put me down now.
KG: (drops Link)
Link: (falls from 300 feet in the air) AAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
KG: You said to put you down! Heehee.
Link: (hits the ground) Ouch.
Navi: LINK! Are you alright?!
Link: (sits up slowly and holds his head) No wonder this chapter was called "Pain and Torment."
Navi: Uh yea. Lets call Saria to see where we should go next.
Link: (calls Saria on his ocarina)
Saria: Hi Link! I heard that the leader of the Zora's has the third spiritual stone!
Link: Really? Where is that?
Saria: Follow the river. You'll get there eventually.
Link: Comforting. Thanks Saria.
Navi: Lets quickly head on down there before anything else bad happens.
(Link and Navi follow the river to a wide canyon and eventually ends up in a dead end. In front of the waterfall).
Link: Looks like Saria's instructions were bad.
Navi: Maybe not. You are standing on an inscription.
Link: What's it say?
Navi: "No soliciting."
Link: (sighs loudly).
Navi: Try Zelda's lullaby. It worked before.
Link: (plays Zelda's Lullaby and the waterfall parts making an opening).
Navi: I see a doorway. Lets go through it.
Link: (enters the doorway) Oooooh. This is amazing.
(They are in a large room. There are several paths leading to various locations. On the bottom there is a large lake/pool. Whatever you want to call it. The two of them walk over to the king's chamber and head down a tunnel and runs into a zora).
Zora: Hello. Would you like to play the diving game?
Link: Sure. How do you play?
Zora: I throw these rupees into the water below. You dive off this cliff and retrieve all of the rupees in a certain amount of time. You will get a gift from me.
Link: Great!
Zora: (throws the rupees to the lake/pool below) GO! (pushes Link)
Link: (Smacks into the water, face first)
Navi: Hurry Link!
Link: (swims around and finds all of the rupees)
Zora: WONDERFUL! Come claim your prize.
Link: (rushes back eagerly) Give me!!
Zora: (Hands Link his prize).
Link: A bubble. How amazing.
Zora: It enables you to breathe under water better.
Link: Oh.
Zora: Go test it out at Lake Hylia. You can get there through the tunnel under the pool below.
Link: Alright. (dives off the cliff again and goes through the tunnel to the lake).
Navi Shouldn't we be finding the last spiritual stone?
Link: We will. After I test this out. Here we are.
Navi: Wow! It's beautiful.
Random Zora: Hello! First timers I see.
Navi: Yup.
Random Zora: You can probably find some cool things under this lake.
Link: (begins to dive around). Hey. I see something at the bottom.
Navi: Well get it. It may be important.
Link: (goes under the water and grabs the object).
Navi: What is it?
Link: A bottle. With a note inside.
Navi: What does it say?
Link: Something about a Jabu Jabu eating a princess Ruto. (lightning flashes across the sky).
(Link and Navi walked into the blue warp that appeared after beating King Dodongo. A minute later they reappear outside of Dodongos Cavern. Link is pretty bruised up. He is covered in blood and looks exhausted).
Link: We need more warps like those. I hate having to walk everywhere.
Navi: You're the hero in this story. You're not supposed to be lazy.
Link: Do you hear that noise?
Navi: What noise? I don't hear anything.
Link: You know that high pitched noise you hear in cartoons that represents something falling from the sky?
Navi: Yes.
Link: It sounds like that.
Navi: But this isn't a cartoon.
CRASH!! BANG!
(Suddenly, Daurnia lands directly in front of Link. Other gorons do that same).
Daurnia: I must say that I am impressed. A scrawny kid like you beating up all of those dodongos.
Link: HEY!
Daurnia: You know what kid? I think I like you.
Link: I prefer to date my own species.
Daurnia: That's not what I mean you little perv. Anyways.how about you and I become sworn brothers?
Link: Brothers? Does it involve a big ceremony.
Daurnia: No. Of course not. That's too much trouble.
Link: Alright then.
Daurnia: Great!
Link: (coughs)
Daurnia: Ah yes. I promised you the spiritual stone. (holds up his arms and a red stone suddenly appears in front of Link).
Link: That's pretty. (grabs the stone).
Daurnia: I can't believe how suddenly all of the dodongos came. There were many of them. We couldn't protect our cave from them. It was the fault of the desert man, Ganondorf. He blocked the cave from us and said that the would remove the boulder only if I gave him the spiritual stone.
Link: (shocked) That asshole!
Daurnia: Yes. Anyways. The problem is solved! We can go back to our cave and eat the delicious rocks.
Link: Errr. Yummy.
Daurnia: You look a little beat up brother. I suggest you visit the great fairy on top of the mountain. She'll make you good as new.
Navi: (mumbles some angry words).
Link: Okay. Thanks. We'll do that.
Daurnia: (talking to the gorons surrounding Link) Why don't you all give your thanks to our new Sworn Brother!
Goron1: You did great!
Goron2: That was awesome.
Goron3: I never seen such a small person beat up a large dinosaur before.
Goron4: Give us hug!
All Gorons: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUG!!
Link: (pales) Ohlookatthetimeigottago! (runs away screaming)
Gorons: (chasing after Link) HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG!!
Link: AIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Gorons: COME BACK HERE AND GIVE US A HUG!!
(It is dusk and Navi and Link are almost near the top of the mountain).
Navi: Be careful Link. There are several hot rocks flying around. Try not to get hit.
Link: (keeps getting hit by large rocks) OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!
Navi: Run boy run!
Link: (runs and dodges the flying rocks)
Navi: Phew. We are out of the line of danger now. All we have to do is climb the large Cliffside in front of us.
Link: I should probably kill the Skulltulas first.
Navi: Yea. They might charge at you and make you fall.
Link: (kills the Skulltulas and climbs the Cliffside to the top).
Navi: Oh goddesses.
Link: What's wrong Navi? (looks in the direction where Navi is looking) RUN FOR IT NAVI!
Kaepora Gaebora: Hello there Link. Here I am again. Still stalking you.
Link: WHY?!
KG: Because I love it! I take it you are here to see the Great Fairy. She can supply you with a new ability.
Link: Where is she?
KG: You have to figure that out on your own.
Link: Why?
KG: I don't wanna tell you.
Navi: Link. There is a wall that looks like it's about to fall apart. (points)
Link: YAY! I get to blow some more stuff up!(gets out a bomb and throws it at the wall).
Navi: (covers ears)
KABOOM!!
Link:Hmmmm. (looks at KG mischievously)
Navi: Sorry Link. We're not allowed to kill the people who are considered the good guys in this story.
Link: (sadly) awwwww.
KG: (snickers)
Link: (walking into the newly made door) Do you know this great fairy Navi?
Navi: (snorts) Yes. I went to high school with her.
Link: I take it that you don't like her.
Navi: She was such a bitch. She always made fun of the way I dressed (sniffles).
Link: Awwww. You dress really pretty Navi. (gives her a hug).
Navi: Thank you Link. You're sweet.
Link: How do we get this fairy's attention?
Navi: Stand on the triforce that is painted into the ground. Then play Zelda's Lullaby.
Link: (does that) Well? Nothing happened.
Voice: WAHAHAHA!!
Link: (gulps) What was that?
(The owner of the voice comes from the pool of water that is right in front of Link and Navi).
Link: (whispers to Navi) Weren't there rumors that she was beautiful?
Navi: (Stares at GF) She used to be but now she's
Link: UGLY!
GF: Hello Link. I am the Great Fairy of magic. I understand you are here for something.
Navi: Depends on what you mean?
GF: Ah Navi. Still wearing that dull outfit I see?
Navi: Of course your prettiness! (does a curtsy).
GF: I know I'm pretty. Everyone is soooooo jealous of me.
Link: (tries not to laugh).
GF: Anyways Link. I'm going to give you a new skill. It is called The Spin Attack
Link: What is that?
GF: It is when you charge up your sword and after it is charged, you spin and you hit many enemies with your blade filled with magic.
Link: Ooooooooh. Sounds neat. Give it to me!
GF: (holds her hands up and a magic beam surrounds Link).
Link: (drowsy) That fairy is starting to look awfully hot.
Navi: (smacks Link) Snap out of it!
Link: Sorry.
GF: All done. When you get weak and weary from battle please come back and see me. I can heal your wounds.
Link: Okay. Thank you.
GF: Nice seeing you again Navi.
Navi: Same to you, your highness!
(Link and Navi being to head back out of the cave).
Link: Why were you so sweet with her? I thought you hated her.
Navi: Because.she is the Queen of Fairies. So that means that I have to be
Link: Don't say it!!
Navi: NICE! (sobs)
Link: (gives Navi a hug) Don't worry. We won't have to go through the pain and torment anymore.
Navi: Don't forget that KG is out there.
Link: Dammit! You're right! Maybe we won't ever see him again.
Navi: Right. Whatever. Lets just get this over with.
Link: (walks out of the cave and heads for KG).
Navi: LINK! What are you doing??
Link: Hey KG! You are no longer the most annoying character in the game anymore.
Navi: WHAT?!
KG: Really? (Begins to cry) That's all I ever wanted! Just some love.
Link: Awww. I feel bad now.
KG: Who is the new annoying character?
Link: The great fairy.
KG: I see. I'm still going to stalk you like there is no tomorrow.
Link: (snaps fingers) damn!
KG: Wanna ride down to Kakariko village?
Link: Um sure.
KG: (flies off the perch he is resting on and picks Link up)
Link: You won't drop me will you?
KG: (grins evilly at Link and beings to fly down to the village).
Link: AIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!
KG: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Link: Oh goddesses. Why didn't I just walk down?!
Navi: Because you're stupid!
KG: Here we are!
Link: Great! You can put me down now.
KG: (drops Link)
Link: (falls from 300 feet in the air) AAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
KG: You said to put you down! Heehee.
Link: (hits the ground) Ouch.
Navi: LINK! Are you alright?!
Link: (sits up slowly and holds his head) No wonder this chapter was called "Pain and Torment."
Navi: Uh yea. Lets call Saria to see where we should go next.
Link: (calls Saria on his ocarina)
Saria: Hi Link! I heard that the leader of the Zora's has the third spiritual stone!
Link: Really? Where is that?
Saria: Follow the river. You'll get there eventually.
Link: Comforting. Thanks Saria.
Navi: Lets quickly head on down there before anything else bad happens.
(Link and Navi follow the river to a wide canyon and eventually ends up in a dead end. In front of the waterfall).
Link: Looks like Saria's instructions were bad.
Navi: Maybe not. You are standing on an inscription.
Link: What's it say?
Navi: "No soliciting."
Link: (sighs loudly).
Navi: Try Zelda's lullaby. It worked before.
Link: (plays Zelda's Lullaby and the waterfall parts making an opening).
Navi: I see a doorway. Lets go through it.
Link: (enters the doorway) Oooooh. This is amazing.
(They are in a large room. There are several paths leading to various locations. On the bottom there is a large lake/pool. Whatever you want to call it. The two of them walk over to the king's chamber and head down a tunnel and runs into a zora).
Zora: Hello. Would you like to play the diving game?
Link: Sure. How do you play?
Zora: I throw these rupees into the water below. You dive off this cliff and retrieve all of the rupees in a certain amount of time. You will get a gift from me.
Link: Great!
Zora: (throws the rupees to the lake/pool below) GO! (pushes Link)
Link: (Smacks into the water, face first)
Navi: Hurry Link!
Link: (swims around and finds all of the rupees)
Zora: WONDERFUL! Come claim your prize.
Link: (rushes back eagerly) Give me!!
Zora: (Hands Link his prize).
Link: A bubble. How amazing.
Zora: It enables you to breathe under water better.
Link: Oh.
Zora: Go test it out at Lake Hylia. You can get there through the tunnel under the pool below.
Link: Alright. (dives off the cliff again and goes through the tunnel to the lake).
Navi Shouldn't we be finding the last spiritual stone?
Link: We will. After I test this out. Here we are.
Navi: Wow! It's beautiful.
Random Zora: Hello! First timers I see.
Navi: Yup.
Random Zora: You can probably find some cool things under this lake.
Link: (begins to dive around). Hey. I see something at the bottom.
Navi: Well get it. It may be important.
Link: (goes under the water and grabs the object).
Navi: What is it?
Link: A bottle. With a note inside.
Navi: What does it say?
Link: Something about a Jabu Jabu eating a princess Ruto. (lightning flashes across the sky).