Disclaimer: Buffy, the Vampire Slayer and Angel are not mine, I'm just playing with them.

Chapter 15: Unforgiven

Connor and Dawn magically reappeared in the Hyperion hotel lobby. This time around, it was decidedly less crowded. They were getting better about landing, Dawn noted as she and Connor had managed to reappear without becoming tangled up in each other. She almost wished they had, but then she recalled the last memory they had just visited, and it killed any romantic thoughts she was having about a certain vampire's son. She shuddered, and walked down the steps into the lobby to check out the situation.

Connor stayed silent. Truthfully, he wasn't sure what else he could say to Dawn to make her understand that what they had just witnessed wasn't him. He'd already apologized, though he supposed he should really be apologizing to Angel. He was trying really hard to come to grips with Angel being his father, but it was hard. Thinking all your life you were one person, when really it was all made up and you were someone else.

"I know what you mean." Dawn's quiet whisper startled him, and he realized that he'd spoken his last thought out loud. Connor didn't get a chance to ask her what she meant, though, because the sound of voices got their attention.

"Think that's what Angel felt? When you did it? Did he scream like you?" A female voice shouted from one of the offices on the left side of the lobby. They glanced at each other, and hurried to the voice. Stopping in the doorway, Dawn and Connor came upon the last thing they expected to see. Fred and Gunn, Angel's friends, were standing in front of Connor's younger self, who was tied to a chair.

"Why are you doing this?" Young Connor asked, staring up at Fred and Gunn. His tone was even, and if Dawn wasn't mistaken, unfeeling. She glanced at her traveling companion. How could they be the same people? Sure, she supposed that there were traces of hardness in the Connor she knew, but he had witnessed his girlfriend get murdered. That would mess up anyone. Of course, now she had an explanation for why Connor was afraid of Angel and his friends hurting him. She sighed, which got her a curious look from Older Connor, and turned back to the scene at hand.

"Huh uh. Don't even try it." Gunn reprimanded him

"We got a call from an old friend tonight." Fred told him.

"Been playing a little Ahab. He's out there right now, puttering around on his boat..." Gunn began.

"With Angel." Fred finished. Younger Connor remained silent, but his turmoil was evident on his face. Dawn stole another glance at her Connor.

He's not yours, damn it! She reminded herself, while she tried to gauge his reaction.

"That's right, Sparky. Daddy's coming home. Guess there's gonna be a spankin'." Gunn gloated.

"He's been down there for three months, all alone, and you knew!" Fred accused Younger Connor. He at least had the good grace to look ashamed. Older Connor wasn't sure how much more of this he could take. First, he found out that his entire life was a lie. Then, he had to deal with the knowledge of vampires and demons. On top of all that, he was learning that he was not the kind of person he thought he was, and he wasn't sure how long he could watch himself be tortured this way.

"Is that what you did to Cordy? Stuff her in a box someplace?" Gunn demanded. Before Younger Connor could answer, Fred went on.

"How could you do that to us? We took you into our home. We cared for you, and all this time...how could you do that?" Fred said, clearly betrayed.

"I'm wondering the same thing." Dawn murmured. Older Connor met her gaze, and for a moment, she allowed herself to feel sorry for him. He was clearly in agony. Good, she thought. He should be.

Fred and Gunn turned away from Younger Connor then, but no matter how hard she strained her ears, Dawn couldn't make out what they were saying. Fred's voice got louder all of a sudden, and there was no need to tax her hearing.

"...All I wanna do is hurt him." She said.

"Go ahead. Hurt me some more Fred." Connor said, his tone low. Dawn gasped, and she noted that her, rather that the Connor she was traveling with had visibly started.

"Oh my Goddess." Dawn breathed the sentence, reaching out for her companion's hand. Never mind not wanting to be touched by him. Connor was shocked as he felt her fingers interlace with his, but he wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth, so he kept quiet.

"Shut up!" Fred shrieked at him.

"You think I care? You get used to it." Younger Connor told them, tone of his voice so cold that Dawn shivered. She was reminded of who Connor really was in that moment, and moved as if to remove her hand from his. His hand tightened around hers, and she met his gaze. His eyes were pleading for her support. It was like a light bulb went off in her head. He too, was shocked by these memories. She left her hand where it was.

"You don't feel anything do you? You're nothing inside." Fred said, tears forming. Connor couldn't believe he could have ever sounded so empty and hollow. He was also starting to realize why it might have been a good thing that he didn't remember this.

"Why don't you open me up and find out?" Younger Connor asked Fred. Dawn began shaking, and Older Connor instinctively pulled her to him. She clung to him as she watched the scene play out.

"How could you do that to your father?" Gunn countered.

"That thing is not my father." Younger Connor denied.

"Yes, he is." Gunn replied.

"He got what he deserved." Connor nearly growled. Dawn gasped. Older Connor tightened his grip on her, as if she was what was holding him upright.

"And how long before we deserved it?" Fred nearly whispered. Younger Connor's reply was never heard due to the arrival of Angel. Older Connor and Dawn moved out of the doorway quickly, as Younger Connor broke out of his holdings. They watched the fight between Connor's younger self and Fred and Gunn. It was no contest as to who would win. After throwing Fred and Gunn towards the opposite corner, Younger Connor made a break for the door. He stopped dead in his tracks upon seeing Angel. Dawn gasped for a second time in a matter of minutes at Angel's appearance. She noticed from her head's position on the Older Connor's chest that his breathing was now uneven, and knew he'd been affected too.

"Sit down." Angel said, his tone menacing. Younger Connor gave him a look, but didn't sit down right away.

"You're too weak to take me." Younger Connor told Angel.

"You really think that?" Angel asked him. Connor sat, reluctance written on his face, and then Angel sat as well. "So, how was your summer? Mine was fun. Saw some fish, went mad with hunger, hallucinated a whole bunch." Angel began.

"You deserve worse." Younger Connor growled. Dawn was hoping this was going to end without bloodshed. She wasn't sure how much more she or Connor could take of his younger self.

"Because I killed Holtz. Except I didn't." Angel replied. Younger Connor seemed to deflate in front of their eyes.

"At least I know why I did it." Dawn looked up at Connor, who until now had been silent.

"I tried telling you that while you were busy dumping me off shore, but I didn't know the whole score. Holtz killed himself. He had your buddy Justine do it, with an ice pick, to make you hate me." Angel continued.

"How horrible." Dawn commented. "This Holtz guy must have been important to you." She said to Older Connor.

"Even if...You still deserved it." Younger Connor refuted.

"What I deserve is open to debate. But understand there's a difference between wishing vengeance on someone, and taking it. So now, the question becomes, what do you deserve?" Angel replied. Dawn began wondering the same thing. What would Angel do to Connor's younger self? Was this how the memory wipe occurred? Was Angel the instigator?

Younger Connor got up to run out, but Angel threw him against the wall. Crouching over him, Angel went on.

"Daddy's not finished talking. Wesley told me everything that's been going on, but as far as I'm concerned, what you deserve rests on one answer. Did you do something to Cordelia?" Angel demanded.

"Who's Cordelia?" Older Connor asked Dawn.

"I'll explain in a minute." Dawn replied, and he seemed satisfied with that answer. She held her breath while she waited for Younger Connor's reply. If he had done something to Cordy, she knew there was no way to forgive the Connor she knew for that. No way.

"No." Connor replied.

"He's lying." Fred said.

"No, I'm not." Younger Connor sounded panicked.

"No way you two disappeared the same night." Gunn said to Angel.

"I'm telling the truth, ok?" Connor pleaded.

"I know." Angel told him. Both Dawn and Connor's younger self let out breaths they had been holding.

"I can tell. There's been enough lying for me to know the difference. The truth has a better sound to it. Less nasal. Get up." Angel said. Younger Connor got up slowly. "What you did to me was unbelievable, Connor. I got stuck in a hell dimension by my girlfriend one time for a hundred years, so three months under the ocean actually gave me perspective. M. C. Escher perspective. I did get time to think. About us. About the world." Angel continued. Dawn snorted at his reference to Buffy. Younger Connor remained silent, and Angel went on. "Nothing in the world is the way it oughta be. It's harsh and it's cruel, but that's why there's us. Champions. Doesn't matter where we come from, done, or suffered, or even if we make a difference. We live as though the world were as it should be, to show others how it can be. You're not a part of that yet. I hope you will be. I love you, Connor." Angel paused and gave Younger Connor a once over. "Now get out." He said. Younger Connor left silently, and as he did, Dawn and Older Connor disappeared in a flash of light.