Disclaimer Always remember, I do not own the HP Series =]

Special thanks:
Ninny: Your Spesho ;D
Sparkles: Sparkly Fresh!
Shuckles: My helper ;]

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After a bad argument with Ebenezer and Russell, Harry growled at every person that passed him. Even the Slytherin's were too afraid to tease Famous Harry Potter now. Harry bit. Hard. You could even ask around and ask for 'Draco Malfoy' and he'd show you Harry bit his finger. Bad Dog Harry. Baaaad. So anyway, in the common room, Ron was plotting something BIG. He was plotting to capture Professor Snape. Why? Because Ron wanted to become superman! Dun dun dun. So, let us proceed and see how the flow of this goes. See how far I can get you.

Hogwarts Grounds : Harry and Ron sat under a tree, throwing stones at the lake, while the kids nearby got bit by gnomes that somehow found their way to the area and chased the little kiddies while the older ones just watched with amusement as Hya Chang wasn't on their TV in the Great Hall at the time. Ron had written to Miss Chang, asking her to marry him, and didn't care that she was the aunt of Cho Chang. Which he overlooked. hahaha.

Right when Ron was about to sleep, something happened.

"HEY, RON!" Ron grumbled, and turned over, and once again the voice continued, "And owl pooped on you." It was Harry, laughing his arse off because Ron had owl dung on him. Hah! Catching the owl, he took the letter it had and opened it.

"ITS FROM HYA CHANG!!!" Ron Screamed out like a little girl.

Harry arched a brow, blinking, "Huh?"

Ron blushed, and ran into the castle to read the note he had received from Miss Chang.

Harry scratched his head in confusion as he had no friggen clue what just happened. About to leave, Russell and Ebenezer came from around the tree, with evil looks upon their faces. Well, duh, Slytherin's, they were going to play pranks anyways, if you wanted to know. Grumbling, Harry cussed.

"Bad Potter!" Russell said aloud to Harry.

"Bad you." Harry yawned in his face.

Russell made a disgusted face, "Do you BRUSH your teeth??"

Wow, they left Ebenezer alone. You shouldn't do that to the authour's character... especially when it IS the authour's character. Cause he always has something BIG planned out. Just like Ron wants to kidnap Snape... Let's see how this goes, shall we?

"Yes, I brush my teeth." Harry answered Russell.

"Good." Russell kissed Harry, which made Harry grab his arm and flip him over to land hard on his back leaving Russell amazed.

"WHOA!" Russell Exclaimed.

"Don't kiss me dude. Who said this fic is slashed?" Harry said.

Ebenezer cackled in the background, once again emerging from the shadow's all in black, what the...? Cackling in his mind, he grinned wide, showing the yellow teeth he had... or were they white? I'm blind.

"It WILL be Slash, Harry, it will be!" And Ebenezer ran like a girly girl back to the castle to go to the boy's dormitory to go to sleep even though it really wasn't bed time but he was a lazy arse and loved to sleep with the sun hitting him through the window. Was there even a window?! ... oh well.

As everyone went inside after watching Star's hit some students and make them stars too, everyone decided to keep inside for the time afraid to be star's for life. The best star's were the star's on the ground that were famous and in magasine's. In the Great Hall for dinner, Dumbledore turned on the tele, and Ron stared at the tele's picture with Hya Chang, daydreaming and drooling and staring at her all at once. Go Weasley.

"Today on Wizards News, more celebrities are somehow finding their way to Hogwarts. President Bush of USA has stated 'We will find out who is behind that train thing in England and then all their base are belong to us!' (newgrounds, go check it out.)" Hya continued, "Blair has no idea what Bush said. Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwart's, has made the castle disguise more into the stars. And where is Karkaroff? Durmstrang needs a leader. And that is all for Wizards News, Ron Weasley I will not date you because your underage. Hope you read my letter right." And the news now had 'Stand By' on the tele.

Okay, now that EVERYONE was asleep, except Ron, Draco, Harry and Hermione, Ron snuck away from them and didnt know Draco was in the dungeons, sleeping on a box. So as Ron entered, he gave Malfoy a blankie and pinched Draco's cheek for the heck of it, watching Malfoy suck his thumb. "Little baby..." Ron whispered.

Sneaking with his own sneaking theme song made up, he snuck down and entered Snape's Office with Snape inside.

"Mr. Weasley, what do you want?" Snape asked.

"ROAR!" Ron tackled Snape, tied him up, gagged him and threw him into a big trash bag. Trying his best to drag him to the common room of Gryffindor, the best he went to was the Quidditch Pitch as no one was there. He let Snape out for air and pointed his wand, "Make Hya Chang like me with loooove potion."

"Ah, hell nah." Snape replied through the sock that gagged him.

"Aw man, please? I'm desperate." Ron commented.

Snape shook his head, Ron gave puppy dog eyes, Snape sighed and agreed. Ron released Snape and watched as he skipped off singing the "I feel pretty, oh so pretty" song. Shuddering, Ron went off to the Gryffindor tower and then ended the story his way.

Ron : "GO ... er... Ah hell, just find something to do. Give Reviews .. FOR ME. The authour is EVIL. I'm desperate, he isnt. Hes reall patient, I cant take it. Someone must save me from Potter, Granger and Malfoy! CHINCHILLA!!!"

The End.