A/N: I know this hasn't been update in ages, sry!

They made good time, towards Lorien and for some reason the rest of the group had forgotten about the original reason for the journey. Towards the front of the group, walked Sarah and Pippin. Sarah was patiently trying to explain why she had drawn glasses on Boromir's face the night before. When, suddenly, a figure came stumbling from the bushes behind them. Catching her breath, Gemma leaned against Sarah's shoulder in exhaustion. Short distances ran and top speed can have awful affects on the unfit.

"It was green and its wheel fell off…" Gemma gasped.

Sarah and pippin just gave Gemma twin withering gazes and left Gemma collapsing to the ground.
"Wait…pecan nuts."

Sighing, Sarah shook her head.

"Honestly, I hope one day her blatant idiocy will end up with used as an impromptu bridge across a large river."

"Creative."

"No, painful," Sarah sighed and rubbed her arm's in remembrance, "very painful."

Some metres behind.

Hannah, lay unconscious on the ground while Gimli wailed his grief to a near deaf Merry.

"I told her she shouldn't have eaten those peacan nuts."

Legolas, his delicate ears hurting at the dwarfs catawailing, sighed and went back to tending Aragorns injury. He probably should have told them that they weren't pecan nuts but rabbit droppings.

Aragorn groaned in pain. If only he had seen it coming. The green caravan had come unexpected at a great speed out of the undergrowth. At the last possible moment it's wheel had come off and hit Aragorn in the head.

Legolas slapped Aragorn across his unhurt leg.

"Keep still you twart! You'll only make it worse, idiot human."

"whe…where is Alanna?" Estel was still unaware the Alanna was curled up on the ground in silent laughter and was finding it very hard to breathe.

Groan "she is FINE, now keep still, you'll reopen the wound on your head."

Grumbling about human's lack of patience, he didn't hear the approach of the unexpected guests.

Appearing, without warning, the elves quickly surrounded the remainder of the fellowship.

"The dwarf breathes so loud tha-what the hell happened here?"

Haldir looked around with an expression of shock on his elven features, the lady Gladerial had warned him that he might find that the fellowship brought great evil. But this wasn't evil, this was CHAOS! A young maiden lay unconscious in a strange position that resembled someone doing an Egyptian dance with a dwarf, of all creatures, openly weeping at her pain. Estel, the hope of Rivendale, sat with the mark of wheel printed firmly across his head, while another maiden stood behind him, laughing at Aragorn's appearance. A halfing and smelly man of questionable appearance stood a bit further back. The only one who seemed to have any sense of the lot was an elven prince, Legolas, who was attending Estel's wounds. He was supposed to bring THIS group to the Lady? Well, perhaps they weren't as stupid as they appeared. At least they seemed to have a little bit of dignity.

"NOBODY BELIEVES A WORD I SAY! What's that Gemma? Someone's in trouble? Oh, let's just ignore you! Lalala! I am an INTELLIGENT and DIGNIFIED lady! If you noone believes that then they can fist THEMSELVES!"

Say goodbye to dignity.

"err…Sarah and pippin didn't believe me." Gemma finished meekly after seeing Legolas' warning glare. Suddenly aware of her surroundings, Gemma noticed the appearance of Haldir and his fellow guardians.

"So, um." Gemma was a tiny wincey bit embarrassed of being caught off guard by Lorien's Marchwarden

"Err…. it was green and it's wheel fell off."

"Sarah?"

"And then Harry said to voldmort tha- huh? Don't you understand? Sigh, must I explain again that Ron and Harry are not in a relationship and that Dumbldore isn't Gandalf's sister?"

"No, I understand that it's just that…well…I have a feeling that Gemma was trying to tell us something important."

"How about, NO, Pippin. "

"Maybe we should turn back and check."

"You do you believe more? Me or Gemma?"

"Good point, you were saying?"

With a sigh Haldir had lead the fellowship towards a small lake which was surrounded by a grassy area. The main purpose of this was to give them rest and a chance to bathe before they entered the woods of the lady. They had all divided into little groups and chatted idly amongst themselves while an area was pointed out for bathing.

The clear water of the lake made Gemma homesick but she got over it fast when a thought entered her head (a first!).

"Legolas?"

"Yes?"

"This 'bathing' thing. Is it done with clothes on?"

"Don't they have baths where you come from?"

"Not that I know of."

"Well, no you don't wear clothes." Suddenly that urge to run had crept over Legolas again.

"Can you bathe WITH someone?"

"Um, I don't see why not."

"Good, you wash my back and I'll wash yours."

So, with an announcement that if ANYONE else even THOUGHT about disturbing her cough and Legolas' cough bath time she would disembowel them. With a LEAF! (use your imaginations)

At a more grassy spot, Gimli had tenderly laid Hannah who was still unconscious. The dwarf was completely unaware of the elvish snickers that echoed around the area when he gently combed the hair away from her face. Realising he had a sense of responsibility towards the fellowship, Haldir reluctantly came forward to offer his help.

"Hi everybody!"

"Hi Dr Nick!"

A pregnant pause followed these words, both speakers unsure why either had said what they had. With a silent and mutual agreement never to mention this to anybody, Haldir turned back around and left Gimil with Hannah. Screw the hurt girl, that was just TOO weird.

Instead, Hadir decided to grace Alanna with his presence. Unfortunately she was a bit indisposed at that moment!

Snicker,snicker,snicker "right Over him! The wheel ran RIGHT OVER HIM! HA!!!"

Perhaps the company of his fellow elves would be considerably better.

JOKE STATUS: Run into ground

"here wolfie, wolfie, wolfie! Stupid bugger, won't even bi-OCH! OMYSWEETBUGGERBOOKS! How, it's bleeding! It's bleeding!"

"Rosie?"

"Yes, och, Sam?"

"All you did was get your hair caught in my button."

"I know sam."