A Measure of Honor
A Ranma Nibun no Ichi FanFic by Anansi42
Disclaimer - This is a story based on characters owned and copyrighted by Takahashi Rumiko, Shogakukan Publishing, VIZ Communications and other associated parties: I'm only borrowing them for a bit. This story is written expressly for entertainment purposes.
Synopsis - Ranma's plan to change his life is coming along; but will that plan survive his mother? For that matter, will he?
Part Two
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He woke with a start.
Damn nightmares.
He might face nightmares every night, but Ranma was determined to make the day different.
This plan got off to a good start when he actually woke without having a bucket of water tossed on him. As he arose he could see his father, still lying face flat on the floor.
Wake HIM up with a bucket of ice water for a change?
Nah.
I'll just let him sleep off that baseball bat.
Yeah.
Give him the rest he needs; it'll be good for him.
Careful of the bump on Genma's head, Ranma rolled his father onto a futon. He then picked up the pieces of a now-broken baseball bat and headed to breakfast. Downstairs, Ranma found the Tendos assembling around the table.
Kasumi was her usual cheerful self, laying out dishes of miso soup, rice, broth, fishcakes, and tea. She's a wonder. I don't know what we'd do without her in the house; maybe die from Akane's cooking.
The aforementioned plutonium chef was already seated at the table, pointedly not looking his way. Ranma could see that Akane was already hostile. Probably getting ready for the morning spat. I'll try my new technique on her.
Ranma's father had, in the course of his training with master Happosai, come up with a powerful technique for avoiding unwanted pain and suffering. 'Crouch of Fallen Tiger' was, Ranma supposed, a good way to get out of a problem (if his pride would ever allow him to use it); but Ranma was looking to avoid problems more than how to get out of them. He had worked on his father's basic idea and had a plan: I'll be nice to Akane this morning; it'll confuse her.
Soun was also seated at the table, softly crying about how GOOD breakfast looked.
Nabiki…
Wow, so THAT'S what warmed-over death looks like.
Nabiki did look horrible this morning. She was still dressed in yesterday's clothes, and they hung on her like a very rumpled sack. Her hair couldn't be called a bird's-nest but only because no self-respecting bird would live in something that looked so bad. Her eyes were bloodshot, with very visible bags underneath. She was doing her best not to fall asleep at the table, or perhaps on the table.
"Good morning!"
"Ranma-kun, is Saotome-ojisan well? He's rarely so late to breakfast."
"He got a headache last night and is sleeping it off, Kasumi-san. He should be fine this afternoon, or maybe tomorrow."
Ranma addressed the Sister of the Living Dead, "Hey, Nabiki, are you all right?"
"g'morn, rnma, 'm fine." the zombie mumbled, weakly.
He looked to the youngest Tendo daughter and went into his new Anything-Goes 'Silver-Tongued Dragon' flattery attack, "Akane, you're looking very nice this morning."
"And just what is THAT supposed to… no… um… thank you, Ranma." Wait, this isn't in the script. He's supposed to start with some 'uncute' remark.
"I mean it. Did you get a new haircut?"
Akane actually HAD gotten a new style. It wasn't much different from the short hair she'd sported over the past several months, but it was better than what she and Kasumi had managed at home. "I showed you yesterday, you jerk! You said that at least it would distract people from my flat chest!" He must be planning some hentai thing. Why else would he be acting so nice this morning?
"Sorry about that; I must have been distracted. I really think that it frames your face well. It's very cute."
Akane was so surprised by Ranma's unexpected flattery that she actually blushed a bit, "Thank you, Ranma." Hentai plans or not, that WAS a nice thing to say.
Hunh! I'm gonna have to remember that technique. Ought to save me a few beatings.
Kasumi, in the kitchen, had overheard the last part of the conversation and had been so surprised that she could only manage an "Oh, MY!" Ranma's almost NEVER so polite. I hope he's feeling all right.
Soun had been so surprised by Ranma's sudden attack of manners that he forgot to weep. Instead he began to plan. Now switched over to 'marriage mode', he idly wondered how long it would take to get a priest to the house if he called right away. Perhaps if I were to get a phone with that 'speed-dial' feature I've heard so much about.
Upstairs, Genma twitched as his subconscious realized that he was missing breakfast; but was otherwise quiet.
At the table, Nabiki also twitched, but only because she had fallen asleep sitting up.
Breakfast was an unusually pleasant meal for a change, with Akane blushing and Genma not there to steal food; but Ranma couldn't help but notice the calculating look in the Tendo patriarch's eyes. Uh oh! I need to get out of here soon or I'll be married before lunch. Do our fathers ever think of ANYTHING else?
------
Ranma managed, barely, to stop Soun's wedding plans by pointing out that Genma would need to be present for the wedding as a point of family honor and he was currently in no condition to do so. Even then it had been a close thing. The deciding point had been when he'd accidentally said something that set Akane off and she had chased him out of the room with a mallet.
So much for her good mood. All I said was 'There's no way I'm ever marryin' you!' Sheesh! If I'm rude I have to avoid a mallet. If I'm nice I have to avoid a marriage. I just can't win.
------
He walked into the dojo to get his hidden money. High on the far wall of the dojo, the kamidana sat on a narrow shelf. Reaching behind the dojo shrine, he found his hidden roll of yen notes.
He gave silent thanks at the shrine for the protection given when he heard a small, tired voice behind him.
"But… but I searched there already. I searched there first!" Nabiki said in a confused voice.
"I know. That's what made it a better hiding place. Ja ne!"
Ranma walked out the door with his cash. I won't be able to hide anything within a block of the house anymore; but it was worth it to see Nabiki's face right now.
Nabiki blinked as she watched Ranma walk out the door… with cash she hadn't lent him. This, she knew, was against the proper order of the universe; but her sleep-deprived mind couldn't think of how to fix that. She debated chasing after him (he still owed her for several loans), but was just too tired to care that much. Deciding she'd had enough for the day, Nabiki went back to bed to get some sleep. Just let him try to hide anything within a block of the house from now on.
------
It was a beautiful late June day in Nerima: bright and sunny, but without the stifling heat that summer would later bring. Clouds were floating, grass was waving, and birds were singing.
All of which was wasted on Ranma.
Damn, I hate this.
Ranma would have actually enjoyed a beautiful day in Nerima, especially after getting the best of Nabiki, except for three things. First he wasn't in Nerima but across town in Edogawa. Second, he wasn't in Edogawa to enjoy himself but to do something he had been putting off for as long as he could, just as he had told Kasumi the other day. Third was exactly why he had put it off, which he hadn't told Kasumi.
At the moment he was standing in a downtown alley, thumping his head into the wall. Psyching himself up, as it were.
Damn, I hate this.
Why me, anyway?
If there was any way out of this, I'd do it in a heartbeat; but I can't think of anything else.
It's just something I have to do.
I should have gotten someone to help, but who could have helped?
Pop wouldn't have a clue how to help in this and would just growl about how it wasn't something for a man to do anyway. Like that lazy panda knows what a man is supposed to do.
No help from the family front.
Tendo-san wouldn't have a clue how to help and would probably just cry himself into dehydration. What is with that, anyway?
Akane would just call me a pervert and knock me into the koi pond.
Nabiki would charge me way too much to keep it quiet and then find some way to release it anyway: probably with 8x10 full color glossy photos.
Kasumi might help, once she got past the 'oh my' stage; but then there's no way I could keep this from Nabiki. Also some of her ideas might be just a bit… scary.
No help from the prospective family front.
Shampoo would take it as a date, a strange one to be sure, and the last thing I need to do is encourage her.
Ucchan would go along with it but she'd really be no better at this than I am. Besides, I shouldn't encourage her either.
Kodachi? Brrr
No help on the fiancée front. Or Kodachi either.
No choice.
I have to do this myself.
Besides, my head is starting to hurt.
Ranma stood tall, brushed the brick dust from his hair and his shirt, squared his shoulders, and faced the morning sun. One glass of water later he, now she, strode resolutely down the street to… shop.
Damn, I hate this.
More and more, he'd been forced to do things in girl-type. He despised it but he had slowly come to realize that his regular wardrobe just wasn't up to the challenge of this kind of double-duty. Especially when one considered all the fighting and other abuse he (and, by extension, his clothing) endured on an almost daily basis. Besides, as Kasumi had noted it wouldn't be too long before he wore out (or just plain outgrew) all the clothes he'd brought with him from China. They were comfortable, easy to fight in, and worked well for both forms, but weren't available anywhere in Nerima. He'd have to find something to replace them. Japanese clothes for his regular form were easy to find; but regular clothes didn't adjust to his changing form as easily as the Chinese shirt and trousers.
That was why he had to do… this.
And damn, do I hate THIS.
She found herself in front of a women's department store, debating if this could possibly be worse than the Neko-ken or not.
Well, at least no one I know can see me.
"Ranko!"
Crap.
Ranma cringed and glanced at the mockingly cheerful skies. I'm just here for your amusement, aren't I?
The skies, wisely, refused to answer.
The red-haired girl quickly plastered a 'cute as a button' smile on her face as she turned, "Auntie Saotome! What a surprise to see you!" More like a shock!
"That's what I was about to say to you, Ranko-chan! I had come downtown to shop and I saw you in front of the store. Are you here shopping too?"
"Yep!"
"I'm surprised that you've come all the way to Edogawa for that. Surely there are stores in Nerima."
"There are, but I wasn't too comfortable with the help I would have had if I'd done this at home." That's true enough.
Nodoka looked puzzled for a moment, then brightened, "Then why don't we shop together? I only need a couple of things but we don't see each other often enough. I'd really appreciate the company today, too."
Ranma had to summon all of her martial arts training to suppress an urge to run screaming into the hills: focus-- a Soul of Ice. "That'd be great! I could use some company, too." Sort of. Just so long as we can avoid hot water this time.
Ranma still remembered the last shopping trip they'd had and how it had almost ended in disaster. Nodoka had nearly figured out the curse during that trip and she sure didn't need a repeat of that. She was certain that there was some way to explain the curse to her mother that didn't result in a short blade in her middle and her mother's honor blade passing through her neck. She had no idea what explanation would actually work, but she was sure one was out there somewhere.
Nodoka took Ranma's hand and led her into the store. At least I can spend some time with Mom, even if it is doing… this.
Ranma had never understood how women could possibly spend so much time shopping. When he (or she, depending on the weather) had gone shopping before, it was a simple matter of finding what he wanted and paying for it. If the store didn't have what he'd had in mind, or something close enough, he simply went elsewhere or shopped later. It was a relatively quick and easy experience.
When he had planned this day, he'd intended to make today a quick shopping day like his usual, perhaps using a shopping version of the Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken technique (the phrase 'Hot Bargains on an Open Sales Rack' kept having to be suppressed). All he'd really had in mind was a selection of slacks and blouses with maybe, if he could steel himself to the thought, one skirt for disguises.
There's a saying that if you want to make god laugh, you should tell him your plans. With his, make that her, mother leading the way Ranma's plans were quickly shattered in a fit of divine giggling. Nodoka and, Ranma had supposed, all women considered shopping to be an all-day activity as a matter of course. She'd had many thoughts as to why this was the case; but as the day progressed, Ranma saw that it wasn't for any reason she had ever suspected. With Nodoka at the helm, they were shopping for entire outfits instead of the separate items Ranma had originally intended.
The first department store only had a few things that met Nodoka's standards. This meant they'd have to shop in several stores, all over town.
This was not in the plan, or in the budget.
Shopping for outfits took serious work.
Damn, I REALLY hate this.
But at least she had help. Sort of.
------
"Separates are fine for most things, dear; but sometimes something better is needed."
"But a dress… I don't know, Auntie. I'm really better with slacks."
"I think it looks fine on you. It shows off your figure."
"That's not a plus. I get enough unwanted attention as is. Well, maybe one would be OK, if it weren't as…"
"Colorful?"
"Frilly and flowery. There's this one jerk at school who's always pestering me before I beat him up. I'd just as soon not give him any encouragement." Not that he needs any.
Ranma had a sudden flash of the scene:
"Pig-tailed girl! I see by your delicate raiment that you have broken free of the evil Saotome's vile sorcery! At last you and the angelic Tendo Akane may lavish your affections on one truly deserving of such! I, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High School, shall permit you both to date--"
WHAM
And Nerima would once again be treated to the sight of the world's first aerial kendoist.
Bokken baka.
"It's not very nice to beat someone up, Ranko, unless it's absolutely merited. Who is it that is bothering you?"
"An upperclassman named Kuno Tatewaki--"
"Tall? Comes from a wealthy family?"
"Yeah."
"Fancies himself a modern samurai?"
"Yeah…"
"Tends to be 'thick-headed'?"
"That's him, all right. You know him?"
"I encountered him several years ago, while he was still in training. He had a great deal of innate talent but very poor discipline in the Art."
"He's still that way."
"Well… perhaps you aren't beating him severely enough if he continues to bother you."
Mom's blessing to pound the jerk… and even HARDER than I have been. This might be a good day after all. "I'll keep that in mind. Hmm… maybe that green one?"
"A good choice. See? We'll have you in dresses in no time!"
(wince) And maybe it won't.
------
"Really, Ranko! Boxer shorts?"
"They're comfortable!"
"They're not for ladies to wear."
"I ain't a lady."
"Even so, you can't wear those things."
"Why not?"
"It just isn't done. I forbid it."
"But…"
"No."
If you weren't my mother… "Oh, all RIGHT. Not THAT one, though."
"What's wrong with black lace?"
brrr
"Then how about this pink number?"
BRRR
"Honestly! I wonder if I could even get you to consider a sportsbra."
"A-- what's that?"
"Well…"
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"But why three pairs of shoes? Why won't one work?"
"You choose the shoes to accent the outfit, and what pair you pick can make the effect more formal or casual."
"If you say so. Just no heels, alright?"
"Why not? They show off your legs."
"Don't wanna do that. Besides, I can't fight in heels."
"I don't approve of fighting, though your problems with Kuno Tatewaki would certainly be an exception. Do you really fight that often?
"At least once a day; but I never start them." No matter what Akane and the others might say.
"Oh. Well, flats and sandals look good too."
Whew!
------
"Don't wanna purse. Don't need a purse."
"You do if you're wearing a dress or skirt. Even with your slacks it would be a good idea."
"But the slacks have pockets…"
"And keeping your wallet there leaves an unsightly bulge."
"…"
"It doesn't look very ladylike."
"I ain't ladylike!"
"That doesn't mean you can't look ladylike, even if you are a tomboy… Ranko? Did I say something funny?"
"Hee-hee-hee! G-Gomen, Auntie, it's just that Akane is the real tomboy in the family."
"So if she can dress like a lady, there's no reason for you not to do so as well."
"erm… but… no?" ACK!
"I knew you'd understand, dear. Here's one that complements your new shoes…"
double-ACK!
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"Not a chance."
"But this blush would really highlight your cheekbones."
"Don't wanna. Not gonna wear makeup."
"Well, perhaps just the gloss?"
"Don't wanna!"
"You're sure?"
"Don't WANNA!!"
"Well, you look fine without it but I think you could look even better with at least a little… enhancement. Consider it?"
"Well, maybe later." Ten minutes after the apocalypse sounds just about right.
------
There can be such a thing as too much help.
I think the Neko-ken WAS easier; but at least I got to spend time with Mom.
Ranma almost staggered under the boxes and bags they'd gotten as they headed to the Saotome home for lunch. Nodoka seemed to have a sixth sense for locating sales and bargains, and that stretched Ranma's money much farther than she'd thought possible. Nodoka herself had paid for a couple of items as gifts, which helped more. Ranma's mother had even known of a store in Edogawa that imported Chinese clothes similar to the ones Ranma was used to, and she'd really stocked up there (Nodoka had even helped with that purchase, once she learned the clothes were for Ranma). It almost made up for the rest of the shopping she had to undergo.
But NOT the lingerie store. Never going there again. Never. Ever. Brrr
Ranma did find her desired slacks and blouses along with the Chinese shirts and breeches that she… he… really loved. Ranma also wound up with underwear (shudder), three skirts, two dresses, four purses, various other accessories, and far, far too many shoes. Shoes seemed to figure prominently in what Nodoka called 'accessorizing', and even though Ranma couldn't fathom why that would be important it was clear that her mother thought it was. Well, she'd wait and see.
Overall, she had enjoyed spending time with her mother, even if she couldn't tell her mother exactly why. Nodoka seemed to enjoy the time as well, treating 'Ranko' the way she might have treated her own daughter.
Well, I guess you could say I'm the daughter she never knew she had. Ranma thought with a small, wry smile.
It was turning into a pretty good day after all.
A strange day to be sure, but for Ranma this wasn't a surprise.