*~CHIPPER~*
So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring
The cool autumn breeze ruffled his longish brown hair as he stared over the river, toward the boats afar off. The sun was only just rising, casting a dim light across the water. Spot knew this was were he belonged, with his boys, in Brooklyn. Still, he found it hard to do anything since she'd left him. He was bored with the way his life was going.
"I can't stay in one place like dis, Spot. It's killin' me." She had told him that night, and he knew it was true. She had always been on the run, she loved seeing the world. Could he help it if he didn't want her to go? All he wanted to do was hold her.
"You'se been runnin', Chip." He argued, trying not to let his hurt show. "Settle down, stay heah wit' me."
"I tried." She had whispered so softly, a tear falling from her once sparkling eye. "I really did, ya gotta believe me. I'll come back, Spot. I promise ya..."
"Don't make promises ya don't plan on keepin'." The words were harsh. He looked away from her, dying inside.
"Spot..."
"If ya gonna go, go." He ordered, then walked away. That was the last time he'd seen her before she boarded the ship. He tried to stay strong, not wanting his boys to see him weakened by a mere girl. But it wasn't just a girl, it was Chipper. And he had fallen in love with her.
Nothings quite the same now
I just say your name now
His boys noticed the change, though. He was so quiet, like his voice had been stolen from his lips and the light from his eyes. They tried not to talk about it, tried to leave him his dignity. Afterall, he had already lost his girl.
"Nothin's like it used ta be, Bottle Cap." Dibs said softly, watching Spot stare across the river again. "He jus' stands theah. No pokah games, no nights on da town...nothin'."
"Give 'im time." She told him, though her heart broke for her brother. She had never seen him like this, and it scared her.
Honestly, the only time his boys really heard his voice now, was in the middle of the night. He tossed and turned, finding no rest, dreaming of the angel he'd let fly back to Heaven. It hurt so bad.
"Chippah..." He muttered in his sleep. Bottle Cap closed her eyes, tears escaping. Why did it have to be so hard for him?
But its not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't want me back
You're just the best I ever had
"Race ya to Tibby's?" Spot grinned at his sister. It had been a month now, and things were slowly falling back into place. Spot seemed to have come to terms with his loss, at least more than before.
To the mortal eye, Spot was his old self. He was back to winning poker games, hanging around with his boys and laughing. He had to keep up his reputation, it was all he had left.
So you stole my world
Now I'm just a phony
Remembering the girl
Leaves my down and lonely
Spot looked into the mirror, after everyone had gone off to sell. It was one of those days, the ones when it hurt the most. He knew he couldn't let the others now how much it was tearing him apart, he was their leader.
She had consumed him, made him fall for her. She had become his world, made him shed his "I'm important because I'm the leader." attitude, and become a man. Now that she was gone, he was nothing. He was only trying to be the leader he once was, and had a feeling that his boys could see he was struggling to do so.
He tried to forget her, because remembering only brought pain, even the best memories. Now, thinking about her, he was just lonely...and alone.
Send it in a letter
Make yourself feel better
"Spot! Mail call!" He heard from outside his window.
"What? Go away, we don't get mail in heah." He rolled his eyes.
"Ya do taday!" The mail carrier, with his bicycle and bag told him confidently. Spot went down unenthusiastically and accepted the letter before warning the kid to get out of his territory.
He looked at the envelope for what seemed like hours. It was from her, Chipper. Why had she written him? Didn't she know what she had done to him? He finally found enough courage to open it, and pulled out the neatly folded paper. It smelled like her, and he enhaled it longingly.
"Dear Spot, I'm in Italy now. I know I've been gone for months, but I had to tell you something. You're the only one I've ever loved. Loved so much that leaving was hard, and it still hurts. Please don't forget about me...I won't forget about you. How can I? You haunt my thoughts and dreams and I fear that I've left my heart back in Brooklyn. I've moved on, but not with ease. I've met some one..."
He stopped reading, unable to accept the fact that she had fallen for someone else, after all she'd said, all she had already written. Her handwriting was neat, her words much too hoity for Spot to believe it was really her. Then again, she was in Italy. He'd never been, but he'd heard that the people were real hoity toity there.
But its not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't need me back
You're just the best I ever had
"Not so bad." He shrugged, wadding up the letter and envelope, tossing it into the river. Now he could at least move on without feeling as though she might one day return. She obviously didn't need him, so why should he need her?
"Spot? You okay?" Dibs approached him warily. Spot turned and smiled, laughed even.
"It ain't so bad, Dibs." He informed him. "She was just da best I evah had, is all. C'mon, le's play some pokah." And with that, they went inside, leaving the unread letter to float down the river, toward the men unloading their vessels.
And it may take some time to
Patch me up inside
But I can't take it so I
Run away and hide
And I may find in time that
You were always right
You're always right
So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to say
Love can be so boring
What is it you wanted
Could it be I'm haunted
Another month gone and Spot had all but forgotten about the girl who had changed him, the one that had gotten away. Anyone could tell you that he had moved on, was back to being himself again. But only Spot could admit that he was haunted, which he never would.
But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
I don't want you back
You're just the best I ever had
The best I ever had
The best I ever
"Spot!" A thin voice was carried on the breeze and caught in his ear. He turned, but saw no sign of the owner. He went back to selling his papers, he was almost done for the day. "Spot Conlon!"
Again he looked, this time a vision lit up in his eyes. At first, he swore he was dreaming, but when she hit him, he knew it was real. She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him square on the mouth, holding nothing back. He pulled away consciencely.
"Chippah?" He asked, as if not sure.
"I told ya I'd come home." She whispered. Spot was lost in joy, but also confusion.
"But ya lettah said..."
"Dat I'd met someone who could get me a ship back for free! Didn't ya read it, silly? Sorry it took sa long..." Her words faded as he got lost in her sparkling eyes, her long hair blowing into them as she spoke.
"I love you, Chippah." He breathed, not even knowing if it had come out at all.
"I know." She responded with a bright smile, "An' I ain't nevah leavin' again, Spot. I love you, too."