Author's notes: Wow, was that a long wait or what? Some of you may or may not have noticed that I have been doing some other things in the past month. Most notably, I've had a brand-new story up for a bit over a week now over on FictionPress, which I hope everyone will go read and review after this chapter (click over to my profile, then to my Web site, then over to the story with the link on my home page).

But now we're back to this story. This chapter is the first of a pair of chapters that will deal with Helga and Gerald. A lot of you will be screaming about missing details after this chapter, but don't worry; I'll fill in the pieces later on.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey Arnold!

"Okay, people, that concludes our math lesson for today. Now, we're going to spend the rest of the time before recess working on our science projects, and I'll need each of you to tell me what it is your pair will be presenting."

It was all going in one ear and out the other for Helga as she stared at the elliptical cranium in front of her. He must have been in a hurry this morning and in his haste applied too much of that shampoo of his. She inhaled deeply. That is so intoxicating! Yes, it does look like he made a mad scramble this morning; his hair's a little more wild than usual, and his clothes don't have that fresh-pressed appearance they usually do. I wonder if he slept well last night. I sure didn't.

Helga's thoughts returned to her latest scheme she had hatched mere hours ago, the prior afternoon. She appreciated and loved an evil plan as much as the next power-hungry bully, but part of her was feeling slightly remorseful for deceiving her beloved. Oh well, what other choice do I have? It's not like I can just go up to him and explain everything.

Or could I? I suppose it's possible. After all, he sort of knows already, doesn't he? Why should I be making this any harder? Yeah, going up to him would be a piece of cake. There'd be nothing to it. "Look, Arnold, remember the little incident we had on the roof where I kissed you and everything, and then later on I passed it off as 'crazy' and being 'caught up in the heat of the moment?' Well, the thing is, I really wasn't caught up in anything! I meant every word!"

"What words did you mean?"

After starting to mutter her thoughts, Helga snapped her head back down from staring at the ceiling and looked her interrogator straight in the eye. "Stop creeping up on me, you tall-haired little creep!"

Arnold had gone to the back of the room to join Lila, and in his place now sat Helga's partner. Gerald leaned back in his seat as if a tidal wave was passing over him. "All right, don't be so touchy, Helga!"

"Oh, you don't want to see me when I get 'touchy.'" She held up her good fist to illustrate her point.

"Whatever, can we just try to agree on something to do this project on?"

"I told you yesterday, I don't really care as long as it minimizes the amount of effort I have to put into it."

"Well, how about you put forth the effort to come up with an idea?"

"What effort do we need to come up with an idea? Let's just copy what Football Head and Ms. Perfect end up doing back there."

"We're not going to copy anyone, at least until we make an attempt at something original."

Mr. Simmons came over to Helga and Gerald. "Okay, have you two decided on what you'll be doing?"

They frowned and rolled their eyes up to meet the teacher's gaze.

"I see. You're the first group I came to, so that's fine. I'll come back to you after I've been around once. I'm sure whatever you come up with will be extra special!"

As Simmons passed down the row of desks to the next pair, Helga whipped out a comic book and plastered it to her face. "Let me know when you come up with that 'special' idea."

Gerald pulled out a sports magazine and mirrored Helga. "You'll be the first to hear."

"Come on, Lila, I know this isn't what we agreed on yesterday, but I think this would be a lot more fun for both of us."

"I'm not so sure, Arnold. We'd have to spend ever so much time together and there's a chance we could, you know, get on each other's nerves."

"Maybe, but it wouldn't be nearly as bad as what I had to go through last year. I know it won't turn out that way, Lila; I promise."

"Okay, Arnold, but do you think Mr. Simmons will let you do the same project twice?"

"I'm sure I can convince him."

"Arnold and Lila, I'm sure you two are really cooking up something spectacular! What have you got for me?"

"It depends, Mr. Simmons. Are we allowed to do a project that's very similar to the one I did last year?"

"Oh, well, how similar is it?"

"It is fairly similar, but I think I can change it up enough to the point where I can accomplish something new."

Mr. Simmons listened with great eagerness, more than that with which Arnold spoke. "I see! Well, I think since I haven't seen your project from last year anyway since I wasn't your teacher yet, there's no problem with you doing it again. But you're not just doing it over to take the easy way out, are you?"

"No, of course not! See, the thing is, my partner last year sort of screwed the whole thing up and I never got to do it the way I really wanted."

"In that case, I'll have no problem letting you do it again. Now, what might this be called?"

"Biosquare."

That little ingrate! Helga began grinding her teeth, thoroughly disgusted at what she was hearing behind her. That was our project, and possibly the greatest twenty-four hours I ever spent with my love, and now he wants to "do it over" with Lila? I thought he actually appreciated the time we spent together! Despite the fact that we were getting on each other's nerves the whole time and set to kill in the last few hours, it all worked out in the end with one of those overly sentimental and dramatic endings that truly brought us together!

Well, now we know what you really thought of our precious time spent together, Goofwad. I wouldn't have traded that day for anything or anyone, but apparently you saw things a little differently! We'll just see how "Biosquare: Part II" turns out if I have anything to do with it!

But wait! This is one of those times where simply sneaking around and hatching evil surveillance schemes won't do! I can't watch him for twenty-four hours without getting caught! Besides, that old fossil will be watching them the whole time, preventing any type of successful sabotage. I need a legitimate reason to get close to that greenhouse!

"Did you come up with anything yet, Helga?"

"No, Geraldo! Quit pressuring me!"

"He's already halfway around the room. You'd better get with the program."

Helga quietly laid down her comic book, which had been providing the privacy for her to brood over Arnold without anyone noticing, and glared over at her partner. Gerald was playing her game; that much was apparent. Helga had never taken notice of Gerald's relatively lazy nature as it pertained to school. Sure, every kid looked for the easy way out of their schoolwork, with the possible exception of Phoebe, but some of them had actually built a reputation on it. Helga was one of them, and Gerald now seemed to complement her in that respect.

Seeing that action was necessary to achieve the bare minimum goal of a project idea, she yanked his magazine from his grasp and slammed it down on the desk between them.

"Hey, I was reading that!"

"Not my problem! Look, we can sit here all day beating around the bush with our magazines and comic books, but at some point we have to come up with something."

"So come up with it already and let me get back to my magazine!" Gerald went to pick up it up, but Helga smacked it back onto the desktop, almost tearing off a corner of the cover as she did so. "Do you have some kind of condition I should be aware of, Helga, or are you just trying to get under my skin?"

"There are two of us here, so we might as well both do some of the work."

Gerald blinked in astonishment. "Both of us? Are you saying you're offering to do your fair share?"

"If it gets it done faster, then yeah, I am."

"That's all I wanted to hear out of you."

"Huh?" Helga thought about this comment for a moment and, realizing what he meant, slapped her forehead and ran her hands down her face. "You're telling me that we wasted almost ten minutes in this 'sit-down strike' just because you had some ulterior, altruistic motive to get me to do my work?"

"No, that's just what it appears to be. The true reason I did it was just to annoy you."

"Oh, really? That's so mature, Gerald."

"Compared to you, it is," he said as he brought the magazine back to his eye level, blocking out Helga from his view.

"Arnold, you seem a little distracted. What ever are you watching over there?"

"I can't believe Gerald got stuck working with Helga. They don't seem to be getting along, but it's not like you'd expect them to, either."

Lila leaned to get a better view of the odd couple at the other end of their row by the wall. "I'm sure they can work out whatever differences they have. We should get back to this Biosquare thing now, Arnold. It seems oh so interesting now that you've explained most of it to me."

"Gerald probably won't get that bent out of shape about it, but with Helga around it's a whole different—" As he spun back around in his seat, Arnold's eyes met up with Lila's, stopping him dead in his tracks. That familiar, seductive glare had a power over the boys in the class that bordered on unexplainable. Every guy her age had fallen victim to her stare at least once. Arnold was slowly learning over time that this look didn't always imply affection on Lila's part, but that didn't matter when he came face-to-face with her.

Arnold glanced back in Helga and Gerald's direction, trying to avoid Lila's hypnotic gaze. He then felt her hand tap his. Not possessing the strength to resist her touch beyond her stare, he surrendered and gave her his full attention. "Okay, I guess they'll be fine. It's not like they'll kill each other."

Helga reached across the desk, yanked Gerald's magazine from his grasp and ripped it in half. "How's that for immature, Bucko?"

Gerald's eyes went wide. "That was my dad's limited edition swimsuit issue! He's going to kill me!"

"Swimsuit issue? So that explains your unnatural interest in that thing! You got any other interesting reading material I can tear to pieces?"

Gerald picked up the two halves of his dad's magazine and threw them in Helga's face. "How about you try tearing this in half?" he asked as he held up his fist.

Helga didn't immediately respond, as she noticed about half the class was now taking interest in their squabble. Mr. Simmons hadn't taken notice yet, being on the opposite side of the room, so she figured it was safe to proceed and save face with the rest of the class. She cracked her knuckles, despite the pain from putting pressure on Old Betsy's wounds. "Oh, you don't want any of this, Tall Hair Boy."

"The hell I don't! I like to play it cool most of the time and everything, but Helga, if you're going to push me like you've been doing here for the last few minutes, I won't hesitate to straighten you out!"

A few of the kids in nearby desks "oohed." Helga, in fact, was just as surprised after Gerald had taken one of the big steps in school-war etiquette: foul language. Okay, so "hell" didn't pack as much of an impact as certain other words, but it was a matter of time at this point. Helga wouldn't have a problem keeping up with anyone in a cursing contest, given her paternal influence, but she preferred to avoid Big Bob's vocabulary when possible to minimize her resemblance to the Beeper King.

The audience was growing with each passing second, and Helga was still taken aghast at Gerald's huge alteration in character. To make matters worse for her, in surveying the room to see who was watching, she discovered that Arnold and Lila had joined the rubberneckers. Drat! Why can't she be useful for once and keep him occupied? How am I going to pull this one off? If I take Tall Hair Boy out, I remain the champion of the schoolyard, and at the same time become Arnold's mortal enemy! But I can't just let Gerald win! Helga G. Pataki doesn't back down from anyone, boy or girl!

Just when the situation seemed hopeless to Helga, she thought she saw a break coming. Mr. Simmons was on his way back to find out what they had decided to work on. Gerald would straighten up and forget about the whole thing and she'd be in the clear!

"Okay, Gerald, Helga, what have you got for me?"

Helga smiled at Mr. Simmons nervously. "Uh, Mr. Simmons, see, the thing is—"

"We'll let you know after recess," Gerald interrupted.

"Um, I'm afraid I can't allow you two anymore time on this. Everyone else in the class has already given me their project ideas, and—"

Gerald whipped around and got in Mr. Simmons's face. "Look, me and her have some issues to work out over the whole thing, so if you could just help us out this one time, I'd appreciate it."

Mr. Simmons took a step back, another victim of Gerald's aggressive turn. "Fine, that'll work! If it'll help you make your project better, than you can have recess to work out all the kinks in your plan."

The bell rang as if it was waiting for Mr. Simmons's cue. The kids stood up out of their seats, but didn't immediately rush out in typical stampede fashion. Instead, they waited to follow the two combatants stationed in the front corner by the door. Gerald got up first, put his hands on the desk, leaned into Helga's stone-like face, and gave her a peck on the cheek. The class "oohed" again.

Helga was unmoved by this highly unusual display. As soon as Gerald "told off" Simmons, she immediately shifted into full-on confrontation mode. Arnold didn't matter now; Gerald was calling her out, and she'd never failed to answer. She reached up to her face, wiped her cheek clean, and asked Gerald in as calm a voice as she could, "And what might that have been for?"

"I was giving you your goodbye kiss." The class "oohed" even louder.

Mr. Simmons looked up as he took a seat at his desk. "Uh, class, you do know recess has started?"

Helga stood up and shoved her way past Gerald, who hardly budged as she passed. He followed her out the door into the hallway, along with the rest of the class.

Phoebe came running out of the crowd up to Helga. "I apologize for asking, but is there a reason you two are about to engage in what appears to be a schoolyard fight?"

"Reputation, Phoebe. Reputation."

"What? Oh, come on, Helga, that's silly! There has to be an easier way to settle this!"

"Why don't you go ask your boyfriend that? As far as we're concerned, he called me out!"

As Phoebe and Helga argued ahead of the main group, Arnold tried to get answers out of Gerald. "Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

"Never felt better, Arnold. In fact, I'll be feeling really great when I get this over with."

"But this isn't like you, Gerald! You've never called anyone out before, and of all people, you call out Helga?"

"Arnold, you've gotta agree with me that she's had this coming for like…well, forever!"

"Yeah, maybe she has, but I still don't think it's a smart decision."

"I don't care what you think it is! She's going down, Arnold, end of story!"

"Place your bets now, folks! I've got five dollars that says Helga goes down in less than a minute!"

"I'm in on that, Sid!"

"Yeah, me too!"

"Put me down for ten!"

"Lorenzo, you can't put in more than five!"

"He can if I match his bet. Put me down for ten as well, and I'll throw in an extra ten on me just to sweeten the pot!"

"Rhonda, since when are you betting on the fight?"

"I've wanted to see Helga get hers as long as I can remember."

"Okay, fine then, but we need counter bets here! Who's down for Helga to win? Come on, someone has to bet on Helga or there can't be any winners!"

"All right, Sid, I'll take Helga for five… Madam Fortress Mommy!"

"Okay, Harold down for five, any other takers for Helga?"

"I really admire the effort, Phoebe, but I have to stick up for myself!"

"But Helga, what about ice cream?"

"What about him?"

"Won't this just make your… chances worse?"

"It probably will, but I really don't have a choice at this point!"

Helga reached the doors to the playground first shoved them open. Phoebe and Arnold slowed down and joined up with the rest of the class as Gerald went out the door after Helga. The class filed out and formed a circle around them. The "fight" chant began shortly after the circle was formed.

"I hope you're not having any second thoughts, Number 33!"

"Is that supposed to be some kind of trick on your part to get out of this?"

"I'm just giving you your last chance to walk out unharmed, Zygote!"

Every line drew loud hollers from the class, which was growing thirsty for action at this point. Gerald looked ready to go now, but Helga continued to stall. Despite her willingness and anxiety to rip the stack of hair off the head across from her, she knew she needed to come up with an alternative to this fight where she could still reign supreme over her opponent. "Care to make this interesting?"

"How so, Helga?"

"Let's say we settle this with a greater test of skill than just our fists!"

Gerald raised an eyebrow, apparently interested. "What are you proposing, here?"

Helga looked over by the wall where she thought it might be. It was still there, untouched by the other classes so far during recess. Perfect, I can humiliate him beyond any beating I'd dish out. "Phoebe!" Her lackey quickly came to her side. Helga whispered something in her ear, prompting Phoebe to make her way through the ever-growing circle of tweens and retrieve the object Helga was eyeing.

"Oh no! Uh-uh! That ain't fair, Pataki!"

I've got him now. "Oh, what's the matter? Big bad Gerald can't handle a little jump rope competition?"

Harold stepped out into the circle upon hearing the newly proposed contest. "No way! I want to see blood!"

Helga pulled the big lummox in close enough for her to speak into his ear, "Pipe down, you dolt! I've got a huge advantage over him if we're jumping rope, and you've got five bucks riding on me! You should be rooting for this!"

He stepped back to his position in the circle, and stammered out some false enthusiasm, "Yeah, jump rope! This should be, uh, really something!"

The implications promptly registered with the rest of the betting kids. "Hey, Sid, I want out!"

"Yeah, Gerald doesn't stand a chance now!"

"Give me back my twenty bucks!"

"Sorry, folks! All bets are final!"

"That's right don't give them back their bets, Sid! I want to put more money on Helga!"

"Yeah, let me in on this now! Five on Helga!"

Helga smirked as a fight was starting to break out in spite of her change to a less confrontational game. She turned back to Gerald, "Well, it seems your fans have lost their faith in you!"

He glared at the master schemer as Phoebe brought Helga the long jump rope used for jumping twosies. "Why don't we make this a little more interesting?"

"All right, I suppose you can throw your own twist in if you like."

"Let's have Phoebe and Arnold work the rope."

Arnold went over to Gerald upon hearing his friend's suggestion. "Okay, Gerald, aren't you two getting a little carried away now?"

"What do you mean?"

"You've got the whole class in an uproar over a bunch of bets, and you're going down the warpath with Helga."

"What's your point?"

"Well…"

"Arnold, it's going to be settled right now, so stop worrying about it. Besides, it's not like anyone's going to get hurt."

"You're going down, Johanssen!" called out the terror in pink. "Phoebe, pick up your end, and don't even think about protesting!"

Phoebe complied without a word. Arnold reluctantly picked up his end of the rope as well, now wanting to just get the ordeal over with.

A voice called out from the crowd of kids, "Hey, they're starting!"

Everyone quickly backed away from Sid to watch the contest unfold, muttering as they went, "You're dead if she wins, Sid."

"If Gerald wins, you owe me Mr. Fudgies for a week, Sid!"

Sid sat up from the fetal position he had retreated to and collected the money left behind from the scavengers. Stinky stayed behind to help him up. "Sid, I reckon you're not exactly cut out for the bookie business."

Helga and Gerald stood in the middle of the newly formed circle and faced each other in an intense stare-down. The crowd grew silent. Arnold asked, "Are you guys ready?"

"Ready," Helga quickly answered.

"One more thing before we get started, Helga. Loser has to come up with the idea for the project."

A huge smirk came across Helga's face. "That confident, are we? Fine then, deal!"

Gerald returned the arrogant look. "I'm ready now, Arnold."

Arnold called across to Phoebe, "Start on three."

"Got it."

The crowd of kids joined in, "One, two, three!"

More notes: The situation is just too perfect for a cliffhanger there! I'll reveal Gerald and Helga's project in the next chapter, and the rest of the pairs and their projects will come later on (you'll see how). Thank you for reading!