Comment: Just something random.
Moving (interlude)
I am moving.
Again, as so often these days, it comes to me as a revelation. As if I was moving for the first time. I would like to say that I am learning to give in to these sensations - foreboding, visions, gut-feelings - but it has come to me without my volition, it has crashed down on me. I am helpless.
Strangely enough, this doesn't make me feel bad right now, but almost - euphoric, exhilarated. Like a roller coaster. I have surrendered my will, I have put myself into the hands of something bigger - I trust.
And I begin to understand what it means, to trust.
To love is to trust. I love her.
Yes.
And in loving her, I am changing. I can feel it daily, almost hourly. A stranger is growing inside me, he is claiming his space, pushing, *rearranging* me. It hurts, but it is necessary.
Moving (interlude)
I am moving.
Again, as so often these days, it comes to me as a revelation. As if I was moving for the first time. I would like to say that I am learning to give in to these sensations - foreboding, visions, gut-feelings - but it has come to me without my volition, it has crashed down on me. I am helpless.
Strangely enough, this doesn't make me feel bad right now, but almost - euphoric, exhilarated. Like a roller coaster. I have surrendered my will, I have put myself into the hands of something bigger - I trust.
And I begin to understand what it means, to trust.
To love is to trust. I love her.
Yes.
And in loving her, I am changing. I can feel it daily, almost hourly. A stranger is growing inside me, he is claiming his space, pushing, *rearranging* me. It hurts, but it is necessary.