PART TWO
Having dug Bender out of the garbage disposal, the Planet Express crew was on their way to Jailbird 7.
Inside the ship the three were having a conversation.
LEELA: (looking through the floating rear view mirror.) Sorry about having to take a can opener to you, Bender. I just don't see how you could have possible gotten stuck in that garbage disposal in the first place.
BENDER: (he is all cut open where he had the can opener try and somehow get him out of the disposal.) It didn't even work. And that crazy old bastard calls himself a professor?
FRY: Aw, come on, it could have been worse.
BENDER: Really? How?
FRY: Well, uh, you could have gotten cut open by a can opener Me, Leela, and The Professor used to try and dig you out of the garbage disposal.
Leela and Bender stared at him for a minute.
BENDER: (disapprovingly) Meatbag, meatbag, meatbag.
LEELA: I just hope you don't act like that on the planet, you guys... (gets cut off by Bender.)
BENDER: US?
LEELA: Yeah, us, I've seen you two do some pretty stupid things. But, anyway, don't be stupid on the planet. I don't want to be kicked out of anywhere or embarassed about anything, right Fry?
FRY: You sound like my mother.
Leela shot him an angry glance before turning her attention back to the space highway.
FRY: What?
(Outside the ship)
The ship turned off the highway and barely avoided a flying truck. Jailbird 7 was in sight.
(Back inside the ship)
LEELA: Okay, we're here. All we need to to is deliver the nail files and leave. Please, don't screw this up.
FRY: Relax. I'm sure everything will go okay. (Fry tried to lift the box of nail files but didn't succeed and they fell on his toes.) OW!
Fry held onto his foot and hopped around the room. Leela and Bender looked on.
LEELA: (whispering) And they said I'd like being a starship captain. (regularly) Okay, Fry, that's enough. Let me take care of the package. (leaned over and picked up the box without struggling.)
BENDER: (His cuts have disappeared like magic.) Can we just leave? My feet are falling asleep.
LEELA: But, Bender, how could your feet fall asleep, you're a robot.
BENDER: Did I ask for your opinion?
The crew walked out of the ship into a jungle. There, Fry looked around and pondered why Jailbird 7 resembled a jungle so closely.
FRY: A jungle? Do you think we screwed up and went to the Planet of the Apes instead?
LEELA: The thing on my wrist said this was the correct coordinates. Is it malfunctioning again? (shakes her arm up and down.)
FRY: I still think we're on the Planet of the Apes.
LEELA: I hope not. I only filled the tank enough to make a trip to Jailbird 7 and back to Earth. I also told SOMEONE to load extra dark matter onto the ship. (looks at Bender.)
BENDER: Sure, make the robot do all the work. Isn't there a robot labor law?
LEELA: You mean CHILD labor law and no there's not.
BENDER: What? But there's plenty of robots working their fingers to the wires to please humanity. You'd think they'd pass a law saying robots shouldn't have to serve mankind anymore.
LEELA: I don't see what the big deal is for you, Bender. You barely do half the stuff I tell you to anyway.
BENDER: If I couldn't go to jail for ripping out someone's toungue, strangling them with it, stuffing their deceased body into a garbage bag, and chucking the body in a lake I'd do it to you!
FRY: Can we stop arguing now?
LEELA: Yeah, if we don't get these nail files delivered we'll get a pay deduction.
BENDER: So, I steal enough stuff to make myself filthy rich. Who needs a pay check when you've got the things I've stolen?
LEELA: Really? Then how come you never spend it?
BENDER: (unsure) I like green paper.
LEELA: Whatever. Let's go, guys. I'm not sure if we're going to even get off the planet with all the arguing we're doing. (collects the box of nail files and walks into the jungle. Fry and Bender follow her.)
The crew had been walking for hours. Instead of a jungle they were now in a desert land. Fry was sweaty and breathing hard. He had taken his jacket off and tied it around his waist to try and keep cool. Leela's pony tail was messed up and she was sweating, but not as bad as Fry. Bender followed along completely fine, finding disadvantages of being human.
BENDER: Will you hurry up? Fry's starting to bug me with his hard breathing. Inhale exhale inhale exhale, it's driving me nuts!
LEELA: Bender, humans have to breathe.
BENDER: Shut up, Leela!
The three walked on for about another hour before Fry collapsed on the ground.
FRY: Leela, I'm so tired, I can't go on.
LEELA: Come on, Fry. I's probably not that much farther.
FRY: I can't breathe. (weakly) everything's going black... (gets cut off by Bender)
BENDER: Just get up. I'd hate to be stranded in the middle of nowhere with YOU meatsacs!
FRY: (suddenly recovering) What?
BENDER: I said, uh...
LEELA: (happily) Hey! What's that up ahead? (points to a blurry image of a jail) I think we made it! (runs over to it.) We found it! We found it! We... (she runs right through it.) Oh, just a marage.
BENDER: I just realized something. (Leela and Fry turn to him) Okay, the Professor only said we had to deliver the nail files to the planet, not a specific place.
LEELA: Nice try, Bender. (She notices Bender staring at something) Huh? (she and Fry look on. There's a REAL jail where he's looking.)
FRY: That was luck, right?
LEELA: (amazed) It's gotta be. (normal) Move your lazy asses and follow me. (She walks ahead of them to the jail and they follow.)
When they approach the jail two guards who look like giant bulldogs with swords in their hands stop them by pointing their sharp blades at them.
BULLDOG #1: Halt (howls)
BULLDOG #2: What do you want at... (sticks his tongue out of his mouth and starts panting. Dog slobber drips off his tongue and lands on Fry's head.)
FRY: (relieved) Ah, disgusting but refreshing.
BULLDOG #2: ... Jail Bird 7?
LEELA: We have a package of nail files to deliver.
BULLDOG #1: (in Scooby Doo voice) Rail Riles?
Bulldog #2 whacked him over the head with his paw and Bulldog #1 rubbed his head and huddled in a little ball in the corner. Leela held the box of nail files up to the other bulldog and he sniffed it.
BULLDOG #2: (sniffing) Uh huh... Yup... G... (Sniffs harder) These aren't... (his eyes widen and he quickly lies down on the ground and starts biting his butt. Afterwards, he gets back up and looks at the crew.) THOSE aren't nail files! THOSE are illegal Star Treck tapes!
FRY: (happily) Hey, I've been looking for those!
LEELA: (jamming Fry in the ribs with her elbow) (quietly) Fry!
FRY: (in pain) Ow. (falls down on the ground.)
BULLDOG #2: (barks loudly then howls)
Just then three human guards came running out of the jail and next to the giant bulldog.
Human Guard #1: (in a Lurchlike voice) You rang?
BULLDOG #2: Theses three were trying to smuggle illegal Star Treck movies into the jail! (sits down on the ground and scratches behind his ear with his back paw and then sits back up.) Arrest them!
The guards cam rushing over to the crew. They all struggled to break free of their grasp but didn't succeed. In shame they were dragged (well, the only one who was litterally dragged was Fry by his feet because he was still on the ground from when Leela hit him) inside the jail.
As he watched them get dragged away Bulldog #2 laughed evilly and stopped almost instantly when he saw a giant, pink, frisbee fly out of nowhere, circle his head a few times, and fly off into the desert. He chased after it, barking and howling.
Having dug Bender out of the garbage disposal, the Planet Express crew was on their way to Jailbird 7.
Inside the ship the three were having a conversation.
LEELA: (looking through the floating rear view mirror.) Sorry about having to take a can opener to you, Bender. I just don't see how you could have possible gotten stuck in that garbage disposal in the first place.
BENDER: (he is all cut open where he had the can opener try and somehow get him out of the disposal.) It didn't even work. And that crazy old bastard calls himself a professor?
FRY: Aw, come on, it could have been worse.
BENDER: Really? How?
FRY: Well, uh, you could have gotten cut open by a can opener Me, Leela, and The Professor used to try and dig you out of the garbage disposal.
Leela and Bender stared at him for a minute.
BENDER: (disapprovingly) Meatbag, meatbag, meatbag.
LEELA: I just hope you don't act like that on the planet, you guys... (gets cut off by Bender.)
BENDER: US?
LEELA: Yeah, us, I've seen you two do some pretty stupid things. But, anyway, don't be stupid on the planet. I don't want to be kicked out of anywhere or embarassed about anything, right Fry?
FRY: You sound like my mother.
Leela shot him an angry glance before turning her attention back to the space highway.
FRY: What?
(Outside the ship)
The ship turned off the highway and barely avoided a flying truck. Jailbird 7 was in sight.
(Back inside the ship)
LEELA: Okay, we're here. All we need to to is deliver the nail files and leave. Please, don't screw this up.
FRY: Relax. I'm sure everything will go okay. (Fry tried to lift the box of nail files but didn't succeed and they fell on his toes.) OW!
Fry held onto his foot and hopped around the room. Leela and Bender looked on.
LEELA: (whispering) And they said I'd like being a starship captain. (regularly) Okay, Fry, that's enough. Let me take care of the package. (leaned over and picked up the box without struggling.)
BENDER: (His cuts have disappeared like magic.) Can we just leave? My feet are falling asleep.
LEELA: But, Bender, how could your feet fall asleep, you're a robot.
BENDER: Did I ask for your opinion?
The crew walked out of the ship into a jungle. There, Fry looked around and pondered why Jailbird 7 resembled a jungle so closely.
FRY: A jungle? Do you think we screwed up and went to the Planet of the Apes instead?
LEELA: The thing on my wrist said this was the correct coordinates. Is it malfunctioning again? (shakes her arm up and down.)
FRY: I still think we're on the Planet of the Apes.
LEELA: I hope not. I only filled the tank enough to make a trip to Jailbird 7 and back to Earth. I also told SOMEONE to load extra dark matter onto the ship. (looks at Bender.)
BENDER: Sure, make the robot do all the work. Isn't there a robot labor law?
LEELA: You mean CHILD labor law and no there's not.
BENDER: What? But there's plenty of robots working their fingers to the wires to please humanity. You'd think they'd pass a law saying robots shouldn't have to serve mankind anymore.
LEELA: I don't see what the big deal is for you, Bender. You barely do half the stuff I tell you to anyway.
BENDER: If I couldn't go to jail for ripping out someone's toungue, strangling them with it, stuffing their deceased body into a garbage bag, and chucking the body in a lake I'd do it to you!
FRY: Can we stop arguing now?
LEELA: Yeah, if we don't get these nail files delivered we'll get a pay deduction.
BENDER: So, I steal enough stuff to make myself filthy rich. Who needs a pay check when you've got the things I've stolen?
LEELA: Really? Then how come you never spend it?
BENDER: (unsure) I like green paper.
LEELA: Whatever. Let's go, guys. I'm not sure if we're going to even get off the planet with all the arguing we're doing. (collects the box of nail files and walks into the jungle. Fry and Bender follow her.)
The crew had been walking for hours. Instead of a jungle they were now in a desert land. Fry was sweaty and breathing hard. He had taken his jacket off and tied it around his waist to try and keep cool. Leela's pony tail was messed up and she was sweating, but not as bad as Fry. Bender followed along completely fine, finding disadvantages of being human.
BENDER: Will you hurry up? Fry's starting to bug me with his hard breathing. Inhale exhale inhale exhale, it's driving me nuts!
LEELA: Bender, humans have to breathe.
BENDER: Shut up, Leela!
The three walked on for about another hour before Fry collapsed on the ground.
FRY: Leela, I'm so tired, I can't go on.
LEELA: Come on, Fry. I's probably not that much farther.
FRY: I can't breathe. (weakly) everything's going black... (gets cut off by Bender)
BENDER: Just get up. I'd hate to be stranded in the middle of nowhere with YOU meatsacs!
FRY: (suddenly recovering) What?
BENDER: I said, uh...
LEELA: (happily) Hey! What's that up ahead? (points to a blurry image of a jail) I think we made it! (runs over to it.) We found it! We found it! We... (she runs right through it.) Oh, just a marage.
BENDER: I just realized something. (Leela and Fry turn to him) Okay, the Professor only said we had to deliver the nail files to the planet, not a specific place.
LEELA: Nice try, Bender. (She notices Bender staring at something) Huh? (she and Fry look on. There's a REAL jail where he's looking.)
FRY: That was luck, right?
LEELA: (amazed) It's gotta be. (normal) Move your lazy asses and follow me. (She walks ahead of them to the jail and they follow.)
When they approach the jail two guards who look like giant bulldogs with swords in their hands stop them by pointing their sharp blades at them.
BULLDOG #1: Halt (howls)
BULLDOG #2: What do you want at... (sticks his tongue out of his mouth and starts panting. Dog slobber drips off his tongue and lands on Fry's head.)
FRY: (relieved) Ah, disgusting but refreshing.
BULLDOG #2: ... Jail Bird 7?
LEELA: We have a package of nail files to deliver.
BULLDOG #1: (in Scooby Doo voice) Rail Riles?
Bulldog #2 whacked him over the head with his paw and Bulldog #1 rubbed his head and huddled in a little ball in the corner. Leela held the box of nail files up to the other bulldog and he sniffed it.
BULLDOG #2: (sniffing) Uh huh... Yup... G... (Sniffs harder) These aren't... (his eyes widen and he quickly lies down on the ground and starts biting his butt. Afterwards, he gets back up and looks at the crew.) THOSE aren't nail files! THOSE are illegal Star Treck tapes!
FRY: (happily) Hey, I've been looking for those!
LEELA: (jamming Fry in the ribs with her elbow) (quietly) Fry!
FRY: (in pain) Ow. (falls down on the ground.)
BULLDOG #2: (barks loudly then howls)
Just then three human guards came running out of the jail and next to the giant bulldog.
Human Guard #1: (in a Lurchlike voice) You rang?
BULLDOG #2: Theses three were trying to smuggle illegal Star Treck movies into the jail! (sits down on the ground and scratches behind his ear with his back paw and then sits back up.) Arrest them!
The guards cam rushing over to the crew. They all struggled to break free of their grasp but didn't succeed. In shame they were dragged (well, the only one who was litterally dragged was Fry by his feet because he was still on the ground from when Leela hit him) inside the jail.
As he watched them get dragged away Bulldog #2 laughed evilly and stopped almost instantly when he saw a giant, pink, frisbee fly out of nowhere, circle his head a few times, and fly off into the desert. He chased after it, barking and howling.