A/N- This chapter is for all those Starfall lovers and everyone who loves the Tayledras. It also tells a bit of how things started and why she left. OK and then soon things are going to happen but here Starfall and 'Flame declare peace.
Chapter 14 The End and the Beginning
Starfall listened to his son incredulously. Firesong was actually asking him to help his wife's bastard. He couldn't believe it. It didn't make sense! Firesong knew how he felt about the girl and while he was sorry that she was ill he just couldn't bring himself to help her. It hurt too much. He couldn't help her. In fact his presence would probably hurt her more than help. This was what he had been brought here for? He had traveled all that way to help someone he had no intention of helping?
Still he let Firesong tell him all there was. He heard his son's guilt and his son's heart ache. There was nothing he could do for him. "Firesong. I know you love your sister but there is nothing I can do to help her." He said softly as Firesong's words ran out. "I repudiated her long ago. There is nothing I can do."
"Yes there is," Firesong said through gritted teeth. "You can tell her why. Why did you turn her away? Why hurt mother that way when you knew it would break her heart? Why use your influence to have her removed from all the vales?"
"Wait." Starfall said holding up his hand. "I never told anyone what to do about her. If she was banned from the vales it was her own fault." He was barely staying calm seeing his son's anger. However, a shouting match would do neither of them any good. "As for turning her away, she was not my child. Why should I raise her? I loved your mother very much, you know that. But I could not have that child there, everyday staring me in the face. She as nothing else, told me of your mother's mistake. I couldn't live with that. I'm sorry."
Firesong sighed deeply. "No, I'm sorry. I love my sister and hate to see her harmed. You harmed her more deeply than anyone else, father. I thought you would like to correct that mistake." Firesong stood and stomped into the ekele, leaving Starfall alone.
Silverfox came in just a few moments later. "Starfall, I didn't know you were here." He said surprised to see Starfall there.
"Silverfox, good to see you." He motioned for the kestra'chern to take the chair next to him that Firesong had just vacated. "I need to speak with you."
Silverfox nodded and sat carefully moving his hair out of the way. He sat and waited for Starfall to be the one to start. He thought he knew what was bothering him but didn't want to overstep his bounds. Their relationship was not always on the best of terms, because of Silverfox's career but it had been getting better over time.
"You know why I was called here?" Silverfox merely nodded. Starfall sighed. "I cannot help her. I just cannot."
Silverfox sighed. "Perhaps what you cannot help is your feelings about what she represents. She represents your wife's betrayal of you."
Starfall just looked off into space for a moment. "She is the proof of that betrayal," he said harshly. "I cannot help her. To do so would be to admit that I was worth being betrayed."
Silverfox stood and went to kneel before Starfall. He took Starfall's hands. "No one is worth being betrayed. No one." He said just harshly enough to get Starfall's attention. "But haven't you punished 'Flame enough? She has suffered a great deal. She was banned from the vales and left to fend for herself. Did she deserve that?"
Starfall yanked his hands back and began pacing. "I NEVER asked she be banned from the vales. I only asked that she never set foot again in k'Vala while I lived there. I don't know where the idea that she wasn't welcomed in the vales came about. I don't have that kind of influence Silverfox."
Silverfox thought for a moment. He'd always thought it odd that she blamed Starfall for it. No one had that kind of influence within the vales. Not even Firesong. So who would do that to her? Could it possibly be that this was all one big misunderstanding? Silverfox thought it possible if not probable. Things were very wrong here and he wondered what it might be.
"Starfall, you have to tell Shadowflame." The older Adept looked at the kestra'chern like he'd lost his mind. "If you tell her all that you've just told me perhaps it will satisfy Firesong enough that he forgives himself."
"Forgives himself for what Silverfox?" 'Flame asked near the entrance to the vale. She looked very pale and was leaning on Darkfire but she was conscious and upright. "Don't tell me he blames himself for what happened to me?" She asked incredously when neither man answered. "Hello Starfall." She said softly.
Neither man said anything for a long time they just stared at her. She shifted uncomfortably. "Quit staring. Or have I grown two heads?"
Silverfox was the first to regain his composure. He came and took her arm and helped her to a chair. She smiled weakly, her strength almost gone from the walk from Healers. Alberich had protested vehemently. She had won out however. He had work to get back to and she didn't need him hovering over her. She appreciated it but although she liked Alberich a lot, he was not one whom she'd trade feathers with. He was more of an older brother figure to her.
She sat in the chair with a sigh. Ayren had gone out to hunt for the first time in over a week. Aya came over to greet her and she scratched him under his chin, chuckling a little at his blatant bid for attention. She gladly gave it to him. She looked up at Starfall and sighed, gathering her courage around her. "I have several questions I wish you to answer Adept Starfall, if you would." She motioned for him to sit down. He did reluctantly. "Silverfox, would you keep Firesong away for a few minutes?" He nodded and left to keep his love occupied in the ekele until his father and sister could end what was between them.
Starfall sat looking at the pale woman next to him. She did not look good. Mayhap Firesong had not been exaggerating her condition. "What did you wish to speak with me about?" He asked finally when she showed no inclination of speaking.
She sighed again, turning her attention from Aya. "Why? I just want to know why. Why tear me away from my mother? Why send me away? Why keep me from the vales? They had been the only home I knew."
Starfall sighed rubbing a weary hand over his face. "I never wanted you denied the vales. Only k'Vala. I couldn't live with you there. Even now it hurts to see you."
'Flame felt her anger rising. "Then why was I told never to return to the vales?" She asked angrily. "Why did they tell me to not expect comfort from them?"
"I don't know." He said sadly. Oddly enough in that instant she believed him. He hadn't been behind all that had befallen her. "I can tell you that I couldn't bear to see you, to answer your other questions. Your mother hurt me very badly. Especially by refusing to tell me who your father was." He looked at 'Flame hopefully but she shook her head in regret. She didn't know who he was either. "I loved your mother very much 'Flame. I thought I could love you as well but I couldn't. It was my failing, no one else's."
'Flame sighed and nodded. The entire thing between the two of them was old and stale. "Then what say you to allowing it to die, Starfall?" She offered softly. "My mother is dead. Any proof or idea of who my father might have been is dead as well. I cannot blame you for feeling betrayed. I do not know how I would have felt. So we shall start again. Not as father and daughter but as two people who loved the same woman for who she was."
Starfall nodded and took the hand that she had extended to him. His falcon and her eagle sat side by side in the tree over head. It was the end and a beginning.
~~~~~
Firesong looked out the window and saw them holding hands. He didn't know what it meant but he hoped that it meant that their animosity to each other was finally at an end. He saw them speak for a few more minutes before he decided to disturb them. Silverfox held him back for a few more minutes.
Starfall went into the ekele and told Firesong to go talk to his sister. He stood and watched from the window.
Firesong knelt before his sister seeing her as she had been the last time they had seen each other. Her eyes were clear and she seemed at peace with her life. He hugged her without a word, so glad that she was alive and alright. She held him tight for a moment. "Firesong, I'm fine. Really." She reassured him over and over.
"I was so scared, 'Flame. I am so sorry for what I did." She didn't let him get any farther. She pushed him back so he sat back on his heels.
"Stop. I am fine." She said harshly. "If you didn't do it someone else would have." She sighed and brushed his hair back gently. "I avoided it for too long. It ate at me day and night. It gave me nightmares." She smiled crookedly. "If it hadn't happened now it could have happened at a worse time. Now, I had the time to recover and you were here. I did not mean to scare you Firesong. Please forgive me."
He looked up at her shocked that she would think that she had to ask his forgiveness. It was his fault and he would not allow her to believe otherwise. Instead of arguing however, he crooked the smile she found so endearing and held her tight. Well he did until cold water dripped down the back of his neck. He shivered and sputtered a bit as he sat up.
'Flame laughed outright. It was a laugh he hadn't heard in a long time. It was her carefree, life is good laugh. He doubted many had heard it here in Haven. He looked up over his shoulder and saw a wet horse muzzle dripping slightly. "Thanks, horse."
Darkfire backed off before he shook his head in amusement. :You're quite welcome mage.: Then he actually snicker-whickered. :Your sister should get back to Healers though. She's been up too long now.: Firesong nodded and stood.
"I am not going back to bed," 'Flame said stubbornly. "I've spent the last three weeks in bed and I don't want to go!" Now she sounded like a spoiled petulant child. Firesong looked merely amused and scooped her up, despite her loud protests. "I don't want to go back to Healers!"
That got through to him. He quickly changed direction and took her into the ekele. Both Silverfox and Starfall stared at them open mouthed as Firesong strode through and then dumped his sister on the bed, despite her protests. He stripped off her boots, still ignoring her protests. Then he pushed her under the covers and put them over her. Then he put her boots in the bottom of the closet and sat on the bed next to her. "See you're not in Healers and you're in bed. Everyone's happy."
"That's what you think, peacock!" With a hefty shove she pushed her grinning brother off the bed and onto the floor with a thud.
With speed belying her weakened condition, she scrambled out of the bed and ran for the door. Unfortunately, Firesong having a kestra'chern as a lover had benefits for him. He scrambled up and grabbed her, throwing her back to the bed, despite her outraged shriek. After tickling her into submission, he covered her again. "See? Everyone's happy." He chuckled at her narrowed eyes and angry face.
They didn't know it but Starfall and Silverfox watched from the doorway, lovingly. They shared a look and both turned away so neither sibling would hear their laughter.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ok so does that make everyone a bit happier? Starfall not such a bad guy anymore and Firesong has gotten over his guilt. So everyone sees now. Later she will get word as to EXACTLY what happened to make her believe she was banished from the vales, but I want to play with the sibs a bit more ok? They're fun when they aren't arguing.
So all reviewers be kind! I am giving you what you want. Not a bad Starfall but a betrayed one.
So R&R please... Kyrette is working off his overindulgence with the turkey and the ham from y-day so be nice to him poor thing is bloated!
Leftovers for everyone!
~!*Cat*!~
Chapter 14 The End and the Beginning
Starfall listened to his son incredulously. Firesong was actually asking him to help his wife's bastard. He couldn't believe it. It didn't make sense! Firesong knew how he felt about the girl and while he was sorry that she was ill he just couldn't bring himself to help her. It hurt too much. He couldn't help her. In fact his presence would probably hurt her more than help. This was what he had been brought here for? He had traveled all that way to help someone he had no intention of helping?
Still he let Firesong tell him all there was. He heard his son's guilt and his son's heart ache. There was nothing he could do for him. "Firesong. I know you love your sister but there is nothing I can do to help her." He said softly as Firesong's words ran out. "I repudiated her long ago. There is nothing I can do."
"Yes there is," Firesong said through gritted teeth. "You can tell her why. Why did you turn her away? Why hurt mother that way when you knew it would break her heart? Why use your influence to have her removed from all the vales?"
"Wait." Starfall said holding up his hand. "I never told anyone what to do about her. If she was banned from the vales it was her own fault." He was barely staying calm seeing his son's anger. However, a shouting match would do neither of them any good. "As for turning her away, she was not my child. Why should I raise her? I loved your mother very much, you know that. But I could not have that child there, everyday staring me in the face. She as nothing else, told me of your mother's mistake. I couldn't live with that. I'm sorry."
Firesong sighed deeply. "No, I'm sorry. I love my sister and hate to see her harmed. You harmed her more deeply than anyone else, father. I thought you would like to correct that mistake." Firesong stood and stomped into the ekele, leaving Starfall alone.
Silverfox came in just a few moments later. "Starfall, I didn't know you were here." He said surprised to see Starfall there.
"Silverfox, good to see you." He motioned for the kestra'chern to take the chair next to him that Firesong had just vacated. "I need to speak with you."
Silverfox nodded and sat carefully moving his hair out of the way. He sat and waited for Starfall to be the one to start. He thought he knew what was bothering him but didn't want to overstep his bounds. Their relationship was not always on the best of terms, because of Silverfox's career but it had been getting better over time.
"You know why I was called here?" Silverfox merely nodded. Starfall sighed. "I cannot help her. I just cannot."
Silverfox sighed. "Perhaps what you cannot help is your feelings about what she represents. She represents your wife's betrayal of you."
Starfall just looked off into space for a moment. "She is the proof of that betrayal," he said harshly. "I cannot help her. To do so would be to admit that I was worth being betrayed."
Silverfox stood and went to kneel before Starfall. He took Starfall's hands. "No one is worth being betrayed. No one." He said just harshly enough to get Starfall's attention. "But haven't you punished 'Flame enough? She has suffered a great deal. She was banned from the vales and left to fend for herself. Did she deserve that?"
Starfall yanked his hands back and began pacing. "I NEVER asked she be banned from the vales. I only asked that she never set foot again in k'Vala while I lived there. I don't know where the idea that she wasn't welcomed in the vales came about. I don't have that kind of influence Silverfox."
Silverfox thought for a moment. He'd always thought it odd that she blamed Starfall for it. No one had that kind of influence within the vales. Not even Firesong. So who would do that to her? Could it possibly be that this was all one big misunderstanding? Silverfox thought it possible if not probable. Things were very wrong here and he wondered what it might be.
"Starfall, you have to tell Shadowflame." The older Adept looked at the kestra'chern like he'd lost his mind. "If you tell her all that you've just told me perhaps it will satisfy Firesong enough that he forgives himself."
"Forgives himself for what Silverfox?" 'Flame asked near the entrance to the vale. She looked very pale and was leaning on Darkfire but she was conscious and upright. "Don't tell me he blames himself for what happened to me?" She asked incredously when neither man answered. "Hello Starfall." She said softly.
Neither man said anything for a long time they just stared at her. She shifted uncomfortably. "Quit staring. Or have I grown two heads?"
Silverfox was the first to regain his composure. He came and took her arm and helped her to a chair. She smiled weakly, her strength almost gone from the walk from Healers. Alberich had protested vehemently. She had won out however. He had work to get back to and she didn't need him hovering over her. She appreciated it but although she liked Alberich a lot, he was not one whom she'd trade feathers with. He was more of an older brother figure to her.
She sat in the chair with a sigh. Ayren had gone out to hunt for the first time in over a week. Aya came over to greet her and she scratched him under his chin, chuckling a little at his blatant bid for attention. She gladly gave it to him. She looked up at Starfall and sighed, gathering her courage around her. "I have several questions I wish you to answer Adept Starfall, if you would." She motioned for him to sit down. He did reluctantly. "Silverfox, would you keep Firesong away for a few minutes?" He nodded and left to keep his love occupied in the ekele until his father and sister could end what was between them.
Starfall sat looking at the pale woman next to him. She did not look good. Mayhap Firesong had not been exaggerating her condition. "What did you wish to speak with me about?" He asked finally when she showed no inclination of speaking.
She sighed again, turning her attention from Aya. "Why? I just want to know why. Why tear me away from my mother? Why send me away? Why keep me from the vales? They had been the only home I knew."
Starfall sighed rubbing a weary hand over his face. "I never wanted you denied the vales. Only k'Vala. I couldn't live with you there. Even now it hurts to see you."
'Flame felt her anger rising. "Then why was I told never to return to the vales?" She asked angrily. "Why did they tell me to not expect comfort from them?"
"I don't know." He said sadly. Oddly enough in that instant she believed him. He hadn't been behind all that had befallen her. "I can tell you that I couldn't bear to see you, to answer your other questions. Your mother hurt me very badly. Especially by refusing to tell me who your father was." He looked at 'Flame hopefully but she shook her head in regret. She didn't know who he was either. "I loved your mother very much 'Flame. I thought I could love you as well but I couldn't. It was my failing, no one else's."
'Flame sighed and nodded. The entire thing between the two of them was old and stale. "Then what say you to allowing it to die, Starfall?" She offered softly. "My mother is dead. Any proof or idea of who my father might have been is dead as well. I cannot blame you for feeling betrayed. I do not know how I would have felt. So we shall start again. Not as father and daughter but as two people who loved the same woman for who she was."
Starfall nodded and took the hand that she had extended to him. His falcon and her eagle sat side by side in the tree over head. It was the end and a beginning.
~~~~~
Firesong looked out the window and saw them holding hands. He didn't know what it meant but he hoped that it meant that their animosity to each other was finally at an end. He saw them speak for a few more minutes before he decided to disturb them. Silverfox held him back for a few more minutes.
Starfall went into the ekele and told Firesong to go talk to his sister. He stood and watched from the window.
Firesong knelt before his sister seeing her as she had been the last time they had seen each other. Her eyes were clear and she seemed at peace with her life. He hugged her without a word, so glad that she was alive and alright. She held him tight for a moment. "Firesong, I'm fine. Really." She reassured him over and over.
"I was so scared, 'Flame. I am so sorry for what I did." She didn't let him get any farther. She pushed him back so he sat back on his heels.
"Stop. I am fine." She said harshly. "If you didn't do it someone else would have." She sighed and brushed his hair back gently. "I avoided it for too long. It ate at me day and night. It gave me nightmares." She smiled crookedly. "If it hadn't happened now it could have happened at a worse time. Now, I had the time to recover and you were here. I did not mean to scare you Firesong. Please forgive me."
He looked up at her shocked that she would think that she had to ask his forgiveness. It was his fault and he would not allow her to believe otherwise. Instead of arguing however, he crooked the smile she found so endearing and held her tight. Well he did until cold water dripped down the back of his neck. He shivered and sputtered a bit as he sat up.
'Flame laughed outright. It was a laugh he hadn't heard in a long time. It was her carefree, life is good laugh. He doubted many had heard it here in Haven. He looked up over his shoulder and saw a wet horse muzzle dripping slightly. "Thanks, horse."
Darkfire backed off before he shook his head in amusement. :You're quite welcome mage.: Then he actually snicker-whickered. :Your sister should get back to Healers though. She's been up too long now.: Firesong nodded and stood.
"I am not going back to bed," 'Flame said stubbornly. "I've spent the last three weeks in bed and I don't want to go!" Now she sounded like a spoiled petulant child. Firesong looked merely amused and scooped her up, despite her loud protests. "I don't want to go back to Healers!"
That got through to him. He quickly changed direction and took her into the ekele. Both Silverfox and Starfall stared at them open mouthed as Firesong strode through and then dumped his sister on the bed, despite her protests. He stripped off her boots, still ignoring her protests. Then he pushed her under the covers and put them over her. Then he put her boots in the bottom of the closet and sat on the bed next to her. "See you're not in Healers and you're in bed. Everyone's happy."
"That's what you think, peacock!" With a hefty shove she pushed her grinning brother off the bed and onto the floor with a thud.
With speed belying her weakened condition, she scrambled out of the bed and ran for the door. Unfortunately, Firesong having a kestra'chern as a lover had benefits for him. He scrambled up and grabbed her, throwing her back to the bed, despite her outraged shriek. After tickling her into submission, he covered her again. "See? Everyone's happy." He chuckled at her narrowed eyes and angry face.
They didn't know it but Starfall and Silverfox watched from the doorway, lovingly. They shared a look and both turned away so neither sibling would hear their laughter.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ok so does that make everyone a bit happier? Starfall not such a bad guy anymore and Firesong has gotten over his guilt. So everyone sees now. Later she will get word as to EXACTLY what happened to make her believe she was banished from the vales, but I want to play with the sibs a bit more ok? They're fun when they aren't arguing.
So all reviewers be kind! I am giving you what you want. Not a bad Starfall but a betrayed one.
So R&R please... Kyrette is working off his overindulgence with the turkey and the ham from y-day so be nice to him poor thing is bloated!
Leftovers for everyone!
~!*Cat*!~