Hey! Another chapter! I adjusted the genre by the way, with prompting
from Kee (thanks! ^ - ^), to general/angst, because, truthfully, it's pretty angsty. Let's see. what else.. Nothing. Wow, that's sad. Well-
enjoy then!
Chapter 14
Hope
We were surprised by what David said, to say the least, and so we hung in that moment for a long while, Phlox staring at David, dumbfounded, and me trying to understand David's decision. It didn't really make sense after what we had talked about, after what I had witnessed. His parents *already* disowned him for befriending me, then dating me, then moving in with me- which was the last straw. Over the years of disobeying to their face every one of their wishes to stop seeing me, he fed their hatred, until it became a blind fury accompanied by stone silence- which he endured at every family gathering.
Why did he want to take this risk? It was more inevitable than risky, and quite possibly the worst experience for him to have to go through. More so since his parents would probably not acknowledge the baby as their grandchild. And, knowing David, he *would* tell them, no matter their hate for each other, but then, even expecting it, their reaction would bring him an awful sadness. I didn't want that for him.
I quickly remembered that I was in the hospital, and that there was no baby yet, just David, looking in need of reassurance. But that wasn't what I had in mind to give him. I didn't want him to go through this.
"Dave, I thought you said-"
"Doesn't matter." He looked like he wanted to forget what he had told me just a minute earlier. "What matters is... you're gonna get better. Right, Doc?" He turned to Phlox, a look of desperation beginning to show on his face.
Phlox turned away to his medical equipment, hurt by the look on David's face he also recalled from the past. "Yes," he said quietly. "That much I'm sure of."
David nodded slowly.
"David..." I started.
He shook his head. "I already made up my mind."
Phlox turned around to face him again, still speaking quietly. "You know the most probable outcome?"
"Yeah."
It was happening all over again, I thought. But I couldn't hurt him. I couldn't hurt another person like I had my father. It was hard enough feeling the guilt from indirectly being the cause of his pain, but now to have to be the actual source of David's? I decided I would rather die.
There was a cold silence in the room as everyone's plaguing thoughts seemed to suffocate the entire place.
"So... how's this gonna work?" David asked Phlox, breaking the stillness.
Phlox took to arranging his medical tools, trying very hard not to focus on the problem presenting itself- or, rather, just becoming even more problematic. "Well...." Suddenly, he stopped, his face lighting up. "I never thought of that," he mumbled aloud, but to himself. "How can it be possible?" He looked very happy, but he apparently wasn't going to let us on to his revelation unless we asked. How he carried on to himself, it was almost as if we weren't in the room at all.
David and I exchanged glances of curiosity before I decided to ask, "What is it?"
"Oh. Sorry." He came back to us, trying to conceal his joy. "I didn't want to- well- get your hopes up" -his voice took on an even stranger accent as he attempted to use the very human phrase- "but I believe I may have found that there won't be any need for worry. I'll need to have a full day of extensive research to be sure, but it seems likely that you two will be just fine."
At that point, he rushed to an adjoining room to begin his search through the database, though whatever it was he was looking for, he didn't tell us.
I looked at David once again. "You don't hafta go though this, you know."
"Don't try to make me change my mind. You know I *do* have to do this." He squeezed my hands tighter in his. His smile wavered, and he spoke, his voice quiet and shaky, "I just can't help but be scared, though, you know?"
"Phlox is gonna find somethin'- I know he will. Don't worry."
I wish I believed that. It was so hard to. I didn't want to hope, because it would be so hard to come back from that, but I couldn't help it.
That entire day was brutal. We waited, and waited, the entire time so detached from the rest of the world, so trapped in our own worries. Every once in a while, Phlox would leave his studies to come and check on me, or to go get something to eat- he not wanting to look conspicuous to the others- but everyone could tell there was something going on by just watching me or David. It was almost constantly tense in the room, a tension that was only marred by the scattered conversations we took part in.
It was late that afternoon that I decided I would take a walk by myself. I wanted to be alone so badly, to use the last few hours of not knowing my fate to reflect upon life so far. I wanted to try to connect my own problem with my father's, to ask myself whether or not I should go through with this, to think about my past with David, but it seemed that I couldn't focus enough to do that. I instead walked absentmindedly as I recalled a turning point in my life.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
There were posters up everywhere in the halls of the middle school, all of them bright blue, orange, yellow, or pink papers. It was the final dance of the year, and it would be the most celebrated. My class was going to leave the middle school for the high school. And since not all the students were going to the same high school, it would be the last time we were all going to see one another together as the same class that had been together most all our lives.
I adjusted my purse strap on my shoulder, continuing to stare at the poster in front of me. I had made up my mind a long while ago to just go with Elisabeth, not to go with any boys, but it saddened me to know that she was the only one of the two of us that had been asked by another boy. Now it was just me that was going alone. She *did* ask my permission to go with him- after all, we had made up our minds about going together previous to the month of the dance- and I said, "Of course!" But now... as the days crept up on the night of the dance... I began to feel like that was how things were always going to be for me: lonely.
"Hey, K'Ela!" came a voice from behind me, as if on cue to bring me more torment.
I turned to see who it was, and there was Rob and Sam, possibly the two most annoying people I had ever met, standing there with large grins on their faces. It was obvious they wanted to torment me. "What d' you want?" I growled.
"I want you to go to the dance with me!" Rob begged in a very false tone. "Pleeeeaaaaase?" he asked in a drawn out way.
"Go away," I grumbled.
Rob pretended to be hurt. "That was a pretty mean thing to do. Especially when I'm beggin' like this." An airy laugh came from him. "I mean, seriously, who *else* is gonna ask you?"
I could feel the embarrassment and anger flushing my face slightly red. I tried to ignore them, walking quickly toward the double doors that led outside, thankful that it was past school hours and that I could leave, but they followed me. I really wished they didn't have to walk home the same way I did, at the same time. Usually it didn't bother me that they lived close to my own house, but that was until days like today, when the harassment didn't stop.
"Awwww.... C'mon, K'Ela!" Sam started in. "Two guys after you and you say no?"
I continued to walk, refusing to listen to them, and balling my hands into fists to control my anger. I tried to focus on the scraping of my shoes on the sidewalk, but to no avail. I could still sense them behind me, could still feel their laughter at my pain more than hear it.
"What? You already have a man?" He sniggered. "I hope you know, K'Ela, your daddy doesn't count. He ain't even a man."
Next thing I knew, Sam was down on the cement with a bloody nose, and Rob was trying to pick him up, staring up at me in surprise at my actions.
"Fuck you!" I shouted, then I turned and ran as fast as I could to get home. I could feel the tears slipping down my face as I fought for the breath that my crying stole from me, and felt that my face was hot with anger.
I was happy to reach the house, and happier that Dad was there to console me. I tried to hold the tears back as I walked inside, where he saw me from the living room.
He smiled at me, not seeing my sad face. "Hey there! You're back late, was the test hard?"
I couldn't hold it in any longer. I burst into tears, sobbing uncontrollably as I ran to the living room and into his arms.
He put his arms around me, silent for a moment as he listened to me cry. He rubbed my back with his hand as he held me, trying to calm me down, saying, "Don't worry, it's okay... it's alright..." but still unsure of what had taken place to make me so upset. He waited until my sobbing stopped racking my body before asking in a hushed voice, "What happened?"
I told him about everything from the dance to punching Sam in the face, and the whole time he stayed silent, listening to me tell it all.
When I finished, I waited for him to tell me I was grounded for letting my anger get the best of me, but he didn't. He held his jaw in a strange way as he bit the side of his lip, questioning what he was going to about this. Finally, he settled upon something, and spoke.
"Alright...." He cleared his throat in a short cough, then started. "I know you're waitin' fer me t' discipline ya somehow, do more chores or somethin'... but t' tell ya the truth... I'm real proud a' you."
My jaw dropped.
"I know... I know.... But it's just... ya never stood up fer yourself until now. An' I admit, ya could'a done a better job at it, but...." He smiled. "You finally showed 'em you're not gonna take any more crap."
I smiled back at him, my eyes still red from crying.
"They got what was comin' to 'em. And you can be sure they're not gonna tell anythin' more than 'I fell off my skateboard.' They're not about t' tell people 'I got beaten up by a girl.'"
I laughed, and threw my arms around him.
"Nope... wait a minute..." he said, prying me off him. "Now for the dad stuff you're not gonna be too happy with."
I sat back on the couch and waited for him to continue.
He thought about the punishment for a few seconds. "No TV for the rest of the week."
I smiled. I knew he knew that it was Thursday, and that I didn't really like to watch television as much as I loved to draw, and also that we tended to go out on Saturdays to movies anyway. "Thanks, Dad."
He smiled. "Why're you thankin' me?" he asked, trying to sound as though his punishment was actually harsh, and that he had no idea why I was happy. "When you survive this week, *then* you can thank me."
I hugged him. "Love you, Dad."
"I love you too."
I left the room and went to go upstairs, but stepped back, taking one last look at him. He had sunk back into the couch, looking distraught- like he was wondering if he had made the right decision to congratulate me standing up for myself instead of reprimanding me for punching Sam. He heaved a heavy sigh, then pushed himself off the couch.
He turned to look, feeling my eyes on him, but I wasn't there anymore.
*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
The dance was really beautiful. There were streamers everywhere, pictures, posters, as well as a collage of our class throughout the year up on the south wall of the gymnasium with pictures strewn in of the class from previous years. All the girls there were in dresses, and all the boys were in suits, even the ones who would never wear a suit again until the day they got married.
I had a lot of fun, talking and dancing with my friends through the night, even though much of the time it was too loud to even hear yourself think. I was surprised to find Jeff had come in a suit, and when he walked in, I laughed so hard, soda came out my nose. The one person who never wore anything but black had somehow been forced into a gray pinstriped suit.
He assured us that "you might as well take pictures- because there's no way in hell they're ever getting me into this again."
I took several, much to his dismay.
Elisabeth and her date were together for most of the dance, but she was with me for the majority as well, which I was happy about.
Everyone there looked nice, but David was the only one who still looked like himself in his black suit (which prompted Jeff to complain, "Why couldn't my parents have at least got me *that*?!"). His hair was messed and spiked with gel as usual, and his eyes sparkled under the light of the disco ball they had put up for the event.
"You girls look nice," he complimented me and Elisabeth, making us smile. Then he turned to Jeff, who was looking pretty uneasy in his apparel. "*You* just look ridiculous."
"Ha ha," he grumbled sarcastically.
We had a lot of fun together, that is, until the last dance started. It was a slow dance, and I had no date. Elisabeth and her date went to the floor, and so did Jeff and a girl he knew, and David was asked by a girl to go dance as well. I was left on the risers to sit by myself.
I watched them all dance, but I watched David more than the others. I watched as he left the bleachers and went down to the gym floor. I saw his eyes meet mine as he stood with the girl, and so I flashed him a smile, but it was forced. I saw him turn back to the girl on the dance floor and lean forward to say something to her. After he finished talking, he gave her an apologetic look and waited for her response. She smiled sweetly and nodded, then stepped away from him, going off to find another dance partner, whom she found almost right away.
He had his eyes on me the entire time as he came back up the bleachers. "Do you want to dance with me, K'Ela?" he asked as with as much charm as he could while speaking over the music, holding out his hand for me to take.
My smile widened, genuine now. I took his hand and walked down the bleachers to the dance floor. When we reached it, he put his arms around my waist, and I put my arms around him, letting him take me and guide me throughout the song.
"I know I'm probably not the best dancer in the school, but I'm good enough, right?" he asked me with a grin.
"Of course you are," I said, only partly joking.
As we listened to the music play, watching the people dance around us, I rested my head on his shoulder. I didn't ever want that song to end. It was just.... He was my friend and nothing more. Did I *want* him to be more than that? Did *he* want to be more than that? I could feel myself becoming tense, but his arms around me and the soothing music lulled me into relaxing. My mind quieted, and I decided that at least while the dance still continued, none of that mattered.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I was dispirited to realize that it was all a memory, and that I had to return to my hospital room. It was disappointing to me that while I continued to remember all these things from my past- more sadly the nice memories, like the dance- I was, in reality, stuck in a hospital, too weak to leave, too unstable for the time being to live out an actual life.
But what was scarier still: I was soon about to hear the news Dr. Phlox had spent all day researching, and there was a very good chance that what he hoped for would not be possible. I felt so nervous to go back inside, to step back into my reality, but my feet carried me back there nonetheless. I could hear my heart pounding in my chest, trembling from the fear of hearing "I'm sorry" once again at the one time in my life when I really needed someone to help me.
I reached the room, shaking, but whether it was from anxiety or from walking for so long, I didn't know. There, waiting for me, was the answer to my biggest question, and it was hard for me to accept that.
I realized I had to face it sometime, so I just held my breath and opened the door.
***************
Was that mean how I left it off? .*evil grin* A little. Well- your turn now! Review! The more reviews I get, the more I work on the next chapter!
(It's just a fact. ^ - ^)
from Kee (thanks! ^ - ^), to general/angst, because, truthfully, it's pretty angsty. Let's see. what else.. Nothing. Wow, that's sad. Well-
enjoy then!
Chapter 14
Hope
We were surprised by what David said, to say the least, and so we hung in that moment for a long while, Phlox staring at David, dumbfounded, and me trying to understand David's decision. It didn't really make sense after what we had talked about, after what I had witnessed. His parents *already* disowned him for befriending me, then dating me, then moving in with me- which was the last straw. Over the years of disobeying to their face every one of their wishes to stop seeing me, he fed their hatred, until it became a blind fury accompanied by stone silence- which he endured at every family gathering.
Why did he want to take this risk? It was more inevitable than risky, and quite possibly the worst experience for him to have to go through. More so since his parents would probably not acknowledge the baby as their grandchild. And, knowing David, he *would* tell them, no matter their hate for each other, but then, even expecting it, their reaction would bring him an awful sadness. I didn't want that for him.
I quickly remembered that I was in the hospital, and that there was no baby yet, just David, looking in need of reassurance. But that wasn't what I had in mind to give him. I didn't want him to go through this.
"Dave, I thought you said-"
"Doesn't matter." He looked like he wanted to forget what he had told me just a minute earlier. "What matters is... you're gonna get better. Right, Doc?" He turned to Phlox, a look of desperation beginning to show on his face.
Phlox turned away to his medical equipment, hurt by the look on David's face he also recalled from the past. "Yes," he said quietly. "That much I'm sure of."
David nodded slowly.
"David..." I started.
He shook his head. "I already made up my mind."
Phlox turned around to face him again, still speaking quietly. "You know the most probable outcome?"
"Yeah."
It was happening all over again, I thought. But I couldn't hurt him. I couldn't hurt another person like I had my father. It was hard enough feeling the guilt from indirectly being the cause of his pain, but now to have to be the actual source of David's? I decided I would rather die.
There was a cold silence in the room as everyone's plaguing thoughts seemed to suffocate the entire place.
"So... how's this gonna work?" David asked Phlox, breaking the stillness.
Phlox took to arranging his medical tools, trying very hard not to focus on the problem presenting itself- or, rather, just becoming even more problematic. "Well...." Suddenly, he stopped, his face lighting up. "I never thought of that," he mumbled aloud, but to himself. "How can it be possible?" He looked very happy, but he apparently wasn't going to let us on to his revelation unless we asked. How he carried on to himself, it was almost as if we weren't in the room at all.
David and I exchanged glances of curiosity before I decided to ask, "What is it?"
"Oh. Sorry." He came back to us, trying to conceal his joy. "I didn't want to- well- get your hopes up" -his voice took on an even stranger accent as he attempted to use the very human phrase- "but I believe I may have found that there won't be any need for worry. I'll need to have a full day of extensive research to be sure, but it seems likely that you two will be just fine."
At that point, he rushed to an adjoining room to begin his search through the database, though whatever it was he was looking for, he didn't tell us.
I looked at David once again. "You don't hafta go though this, you know."
"Don't try to make me change my mind. You know I *do* have to do this." He squeezed my hands tighter in his. His smile wavered, and he spoke, his voice quiet and shaky, "I just can't help but be scared, though, you know?"
"Phlox is gonna find somethin'- I know he will. Don't worry."
I wish I believed that. It was so hard to. I didn't want to hope, because it would be so hard to come back from that, but I couldn't help it.
That entire day was brutal. We waited, and waited, the entire time so detached from the rest of the world, so trapped in our own worries. Every once in a while, Phlox would leave his studies to come and check on me, or to go get something to eat- he not wanting to look conspicuous to the others- but everyone could tell there was something going on by just watching me or David. It was almost constantly tense in the room, a tension that was only marred by the scattered conversations we took part in.
It was late that afternoon that I decided I would take a walk by myself. I wanted to be alone so badly, to use the last few hours of not knowing my fate to reflect upon life so far. I wanted to try to connect my own problem with my father's, to ask myself whether or not I should go through with this, to think about my past with David, but it seemed that I couldn't focus enough to do that. I instead walked absentmindedly as I recalled a turning point in my life.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
There were posters up everywhere in the halls of the middle school, all of them bright blue, orange, yellow, or pink papers. It was the final dance of the year, and it would be the most celebrated. My class was going to leave the middle school for the high school. And since not all the students were going to the same high school, it would be the last time we were all going to see one another together as the same class that had been together most all our lives.
I adjusted my purse strap on my shoulder, continuing to stare at the poster in front of me. I had made up my mind a long while ago to just go with Elisabeth, not to go with any boys, but it saddened me to know that she was the only one of the two of us that had been asked by another boy. Now it was just me that was going alone. She *did* ask my permission to go with him- after all, we had made up our minds about going together previous to the month of the dance- and I said, "Of course!" But now... as the days crept up on the night of the dance... I began to feel like that was how things were always going to be for me: lonely.
"Hey, K'Ela!" came a voice from behind me, as if on cue to bring me more torment.
I turned to see who it was, and there was Rob and Sam, possibly the two most annoying people I had ever met, standing there with large grins on their faces. It was obvious they wanted to torment me. "What d' you want?" I growled.
"I want you to go to the dance with me!" Rob begged in a very false tone. "Pleeeeaaaaase?" he asked in a drawn out way.
"Go away," I grumbled.
Rob pretended to be hurt. "That was a pretty mean thing to do. Especially when I'm beggin' like this." An airy laugh came from him. "I mean, seriously, who *else* is gonna ask you?"
I could feel the embarrassment and anger flushing my face slightly red. I tried to ignore them, walking quickly toward the double doors that led outside, thankful that it was past school hours and that I could leave, but they followed me. I really wished they didn't have to walk home the same way I did, at the same time. Usually it didn't bother me that they lived close to my own house, but that was until days like today, when the harassment didn't stop.
"Awwww.... C'mon, K'Ela!" Sam started in. "Two guys after you and you say no?"
I continued to walk, refusing to listen to them, and balling my hands into fists to control my anger. I tried to focus on the scraping of my shoes on the sidewalk, but to no avail. I could still sense them behind me, could still feel their laughter at my pain more than hear it.
"What? You already have a man?" He sniggered. "I hope you know, K'Ela, your daddy doesn't count. He ain't even a man."
Next thing I knew, Sam was down on the cement with a bloody nose, and Rob was trying to pick him up, staring up at me in surprise at my actions.
"Fuck you!" I shouted, then I turned and ran as fast as I could to get home. I could feel the tears slipping down my face as I fought for the breath that my crying stole from me, and felt that my face was hot with anger.
I was happy to reach the house, and happier that Dad was there to console me. I tried to hold the tears back as I walked inside, where he saw me from the living room.
He smiled at me, not seeing my sad face. "Hey there! You're back late, was the test hard?"
I couldn't hold it in any longer. I burst into tears, sobbing uncontrollably as I ran to the living room and into his arms.
He put his arms around me, silent for a moment as he listened to me cry. He rubbed my back with his hand as he held me, trying to calm me down, saying, "Don't worry, it's okay... it's alright..." but still unsure of what had taken place to make me so upset. He waited until my sobbing stopped racking my body before asking in a hushed voice, "What happened?"
I told him about everything from the dance to punching Sam in the face, and the whole time he stayed silent, listening to me tell it all.
When I finished, I waited for him to tell me I was grounded for letting my anger get the best of me, but he didn't. He held his jaw in a strange way as he bit the side of his lip, questioning what he was going to about this. Finally, he settled upon something, and spoke.
"Alright...." He cleared his throat in a short cough, then started. "I know you're waitin' fer me t' discipline ya somehow, do more chores or somethin'... but t' tell ya the truth... I'm real proud a' you."
My jaw dropped.
"I know... I know.... But it's just... ya never stood up fer yourself until now. An' I admit, ya could'a done a better job at it, but...." He smiled. "You finally showed 'em you're not gonna take any more crap."
I smiled back at him, my eyes still red from crying.
"They got what was comin' to 'em. And you can be sure they're not gonna tell anythin' more than 'I fell off my skateboard.' They're not about t' tell people 'I got beaten up by a girl.'"
I laughed, and threw my arms around him.
"Nope... wait a minute..." he said, prying me off him. "Now for the dad stuff you're not gonna be too happy with."
I sat back on the couch and waited for him to continue.
He thought about the punishment for a few seconds. "No TV for the rest of the week."
I smiled. I knew he knew that it was Thursday, and that I didn't really like to watch television as much as I loved to draw, and also that we tended to go out on Saturdays to movies anyway. "Thanks, Dad."
He smiled. "Why're you thankin' me?" he asked, trying to sound as though his punishment was actually harsh, and that he had no idea why I was happy. "When you survive this week, *then* you can thank me."
I hugged him. "Love you, Dad."
"I love you too."
I left the room and went to go upstairs, but stepped back, taking one last look at him. He had sunk back into the couch, looking distraught- like he was wondering if he had made the right decision to congratulate me standing up for myself instead of reprimanding me for punching Sam. He heaved a heavy sigh, then pushed himself off the couch.
He turned to look, feeling my eyes on him, but I wasn't there anymore.
*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
The dance was really beautiful. There were streamers everywhere, pictures, posters, as well as a collage of our class throughout the year up on the south wall of the gymnasium with pictures strewn in of the class from previous years. All the girls there were in dresses, and all the boys were in suits, even the ones who would never wear a suit again until the day they got married.
I had a lot of fun, talking and dancing with my friends through the night, even though much of the time it was too loud to even hear yourself think. I was surprised to find Jeff had come in a suit, and when he walked in, I laughed so hard, soda came out my nose. The one person who never wore anything but black had somehow been forced into a gray pinstriped suit.
He assured us that "you might as well take pictures- because there's no way in hell they're ever getting me into this again."
I took several, much to his dismay.
Elisabeth and her date were together for most of the dance, but she was with me for the majority as well, which I was happy about.
Everyone there looked nice, but David was the only one who still looked like himself in his black suit (which prompted Jeff to complain, "Why couldn't my parents have at least got me *that*?!"). His hair was messed and spiked with gel as usual, and his eyes sparkled under the light of the disco ball they had put up for the event.
"You girls look nice," he complimented me and Elisabeth, making us smile. Then he turned to Jeff, who was looking pretty uneasy in his apparel. "*You* just look ridiculous."
"Ha ha," he grumbled sarcastically.
We had a lot of fun together, that is, until the last dance started. It was a slow dance, and I had no date. Elisabeth and her date went to the floor, and so did Jeff and a girl he knew, and David was asked by a girl to go dance as well. I was left on the risers to sit by myself.
I watched them all dance, but I watched David more than the others. I watched as he left the bleachers and went down to the gym floor. I saw his eyes meet mine as he stood with the girl, and so I flashed him a smile, but it was forced. I saw him turn back to the girl on the dance floor and lean forward to say something to her. After he finished talking, he gave her an apologetic look and waited for her response. She smiled sweetly and nodded, then stepped away from him, going off to find another dance partner, whom she found almost right away.
He had his eyes on me the entire time as he came back up the bleachers. "Do you want to dance with me, K'Ela?" he asked as with as much charm as he could while speaking over the music, holding out his hand for me to take.
My smile widened, genuine now. I took his hand and walked down the bleachers to the dance floor. When we reached it, he put his arms around my waist, and I put my arms around him, letting him take me and guide me throughout the song.
"I know I'm probably not the best dancer in the school, but I'm good enough, right?" he asked me with a grin.
"Of course you are," I said, only partly joking.
As we listened to the music play, watching the people dance around us, I rested my head on his shoulder. I didn't ever want that song to end. It was just.... He was my friend and nothing more. Did I *want* him to be more than that? Did *he* want to be more than that? I could feel myself becoming tense, but his arms around me and the soothing music lulled me into relaxing. My mind quieted, and I decided that at least while the dance still continued, none of that mattered.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I was dispirited to realize that it was all a memory, and that I had to return to my hospital room. It was disappointing to me that while I continued to remember all these things from my past- more sadly the nice memories, like the dance- I was, in reality, stuck in a hospital, too weak to leave, too unstable for the time being to live out an actual life.
But what was scarier still: I was soon about to hear the news Dr. Phlox had spent all day researching, and there was a very good chance that what he hoped for would not be possible. I felt so nervous to go back inside, to step back into my reality, but my feet carried me back there nonetheless. I could hear my heart pounding in my chest, trembling from the fear of hearing "I'm sorry" once again at the one time in my life when I really needed someone to help me.
I reached the room, shaking, but whether it was from anxiety or from walking for so long, I didn't know. There, waiting for me, was the answer to my biggest question, and it was hard for me to accept that.
I realized I had to face it sometime, so I just held my breath and opened the door.
***************
Was that mean how I left it off? .*evil grin* A little. Well- your turn now! Review! The more reviews I get, the more I work on the next chapter!
(It's just a fact. ^ - ^)