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Chapter 20: Commitment

March 22nd

3:46 PM

The Loft

Fire. There was fire everywhere. His entire body was engulfed in flame and vanishing in a thick layer of smoke. No matter how hard he tried to hold on, to resist the flames, he was powerless. Forced to watch the flames melt him, destroy him, bit by bit.

Roger woke with a start, drenched in sweat and breathing hard. He was lying on the couch, an old tattered blanket draped over him. His head was pounding incessantly and his stomach felt like a pot of boiling water.

"Shit," Roger muttered as he caught sight of the burned spot on the rug from the night before. "Mark?"

"Yeah?" Mark answered him, sounding utterly uninterested.

Roger sat up slightly, wincing as his eyes met the light. Mark was sitting at the table, scribbling on a piece of paper.

"Remind me. . .never to drink again. . ."

Roger sat up, then staggered into the bathroom, leaning over the toilet bowl as his stomach emptied itself against his will. Mark appeared behind him a few minutes later with a glass of water and a bottle of Tylenol.

"Too bad Mimi isn't here to see this," Mark commented casually, "She'd consider this sweet revenge."

"Very funny," Roger shot back, grabbing the water from Mark and gulping down four Tylenol. "Where is she anyway?"

"Locked in the bedroom. Crying, I think."

"Shit." Roger muttered again. "Was I really that bad?"

Mark nodded glumly.

"Worse."

Roger sighed.

"You think I should go talk to her?"

Mark quirked an eyebrow at Roger.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Stupid question."

Roger got up slowly, trying to make the room stop spinning around him. He waved Mark away, then went over to the bedroom door and knocked lightly on it.

"Mimi?" he called softly.

"Go away."

Her voice sounded tired, hoarse. It made Roger want to dig a hole in the ground and never come out again.

"Please let me in," he tried again, "At least let me attempt to apologize before you kill me."

"No."

Roger sighed.

"Fine then. I'm going to sit outside your door until we both waste away and starve to death."

Roger sat down with his back to the wall across from the door and crossed his arms on top of his knees, waiting.

After a few minutes, he heard the door unlatch. He jumped up and went over to face Mimi.

She was still dressed in the jeans and red tank top she'd been wearing the night before, but her clothes were wrinkled and her hair was a mass of tangles. Her eyes were red and he could see dried tear tracks on her cheeks.

"God, Mimi. . ." Roger whispered. He reached out to touch her cheek, but she grabbed his wrist, pushing his hand away. "I'm sorry."

"Too bad."

"Guys, I'm going for groceries!" Mark called, practically fleeing the loft.

"Can we talk?" Roger asked softly.

Mimi cocked her head to one side, regarding him coolly. For a moment Roger was struck by how incredibly feline she looked, realizing that he'd caught Fender looking at him the same way the previous morning. He smiled slightly, then instantly regretted it when he saw her eyes flash with anger.

"My God, Roger. What the hell do you find so damn amusing about all of this?"

"Nothing!" Roger protested, throwing up his hands helplessly, "It was just the way you were looking at me. I was thinking that-"

"That what? It's amusing to make me mad?"

"No!"

"You want me to talk? I'll talk!"

"Mimi-"

"What? You're gonna offer me some kind of half-assed reason why I should forgive you, right? Well listen to me for just a second. Look at it from my perspective, if you're capable of hearing through that enormous ego of yours. Maybe you haven't realized it yet, but I am going to have your child in a little less than six months. And the only thing you can say to me about it is that you're thrilled and that we'll deal with it somehow. Now tell me, in the last month, what have you done to help me prepare for this? And don't think this is just about last night, Roger. If I'd thought that you were even capable of being serious about this, about me, then maybe I'd let it go."

"Mimi, I'm sorry, okay? Maybe I'm not ready for this! It's not like I asked for it!"

"You know what, Roger? Neither did I. But that doesn't mean we can just pretend it isn't going to happen. Because nothing can change that now. I made my decision and I'm not going back. Whether you like it or not. I'm stuck here. I have to make a choice, apparently. I want to be with you, and I want to have this baby. But apparently I can't have both. And Roger, I hate to say this, but you're not exactly in my favor at the moment. So you tell me. If you were in my position, what would you choose?"

Roger just stood there for a moment, searching for a response.

"Look, Mimi, I hear you. And I don't blame you for feeling this way. I'll admit I haven't done a very good job of supporting you lately. But. . .I'm not even sure where to start! Give me a chance!"

"Give you a chance? Roger, we only get one fucking chance at this! It isn't some kind of game!"

"I know that!" Roger shouted, "Please, just tell me what you need and I'll do it!"

"What do I need? I need a commitment." She went over to stand in front of him, taking both of his hands firmly in hers. "Look, Roger, I don't want to do this alone. But I need to know you'll be there when I need you."

Roger nodded slowly, a smile creeping its way over his face. He grinned at her, then slowly got down on one knee, still holding her hand.

"Marry me?" he asked, still grinning.

"What?" she looked thoroughly shocked.

"Will you marry me? You know, where I buy you a ring and everything?"

She looked at him and shook her head in disbelief, her face a mixture of amusement and utter shock.

"Nice comeback."

"Well, will you?"

She looked away from him for a minute, her eyes sparkling with tears.

"Damn it, Roger, I hate you."

"Why?"

"Because. . .because I can't say no when you ask me something like that. No matter how hard I try not to I still love you!"

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes," she whispered, then louder, "Yes."

Mimi knelt down in front of him and threw her arms around his neck, burying her face in his shoulder, still crying.

"God, I thought you'd never ask."

"I love you." Roger said softly.

"I know. I love you too." She laughed softly. "God, Roger, can we all live happily ever after now?"

Roger smiled into her hair.

"Sure, babe. Anything you want."

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Review please. Cuz this is the last happy chapter you get for a while. A VERY log while.