~~~**~~~

Chapter 21: Out the Window

April 13th

9:42 AM

The Loft

Roger stood staring at the phone as if it was a bomb with a lit fuse, ready to explode at any moment. His heart was pounding and his mouth had gone dry. Calling his mother was the last thing in the world he wanted to do, but he'd been promising Mimi he'd tell her about the baby and Joanne had already agreed to let Roger borrow her car so he and Mimi could drive to Scarsdale to see her. There was no turning back.

Roger sighed and dialed the number as quickly as he could, forcing himself to stand and listen to the dial tone instead of simply slamming down the receiver as he had so many times before.

"Hello?"

Roger winced at the sound of his mother's voice. She always sounded so tense.

"Mom?"

"Roger! Honey, it's so good to hear your voice. I haven't spoken to you since Christmas!"

"I. . .um. . .I've been busy."

"Well that's wonderful. How are you?"

"I'm. . . great?" Roger sighed, knowing that his next statement would end the pleasantries. "Look, Mom, I'm calling because I have to tell you something."

There was a moment of silence, then Roger heard her sigh too.

"Well, then I guess you'd better tell me."

"You remember my girlfriend Mimi?"

"Yes." She sounded suspicious.

"Well, we're getting married."

"Roger, honey, do you really think that's wise? I mean you've never really been much of one to-"

"And she's pregnant." Roger finished quickly.

There was another long silence.

"And you're happy with that?" she asked finally.

"Yes!" Roger answered emphatically, "I love her and whatever it takes to be with her, that's what I'll do. This is. . .this is what I've always wanted." Roger finished, knowing that the last part was far from true.

""Well, then, I guess I'm happy for you. It's just that you're the boy who always told me you were never getting married because you hated the idea of family life."

Roger paused, taken aback at that.

"I guess I never knew I wanted it before." He answered, feeling strangely trapped, suffocated. "All I know is that I want it now."

"All right, fair enough. I guess a congratulations is in order then."

"Thanks. Um. . .do you think we could. . .maybe drive up and have dinner with you sometime?"

"Why, yes, Roger, I would love that. Did you have a date in mind?"

Roger cleared his throat.

"I was kind of thinking. . .um, tonight?"

"Well that certainly is a surprise."

"I hope it's not a problem."

"No, no, of course not! I'd love to have you."

"So then I'll see you later?" Roger asked, taking a deep breath.

"Certainly."

"Bye then."

"Goodbye."

Roger hung up and took a deep, steadying breath, then went back out into the living room. Mimi, Mark, and Aimee were sitting around the small table, looking through magazines for possible nursery schemes.

"And so?" Mimi asked, looking up hopefully.

"I did it." Roger grinned at the look of happiness that instantly spread over her face.

Mimi stood up and went over to Roger, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his shoulder.

"What did she say?"

"Congratulations. And that she wants us to drive up and have dinner with her and my dad tonight."

Mimi grinned and kissed him.

"See? That wasn't so bad."

"No." Roger kissed her back. "But it could've been."

"But it wasn't."

Mimi giggled and kissed him again.

"My God," Mark muttered, "Better be careful, Rog, or you're not gonna have any lips left to kiss the bride by the time you actually get married."

Roger snorted.

"Come on, Marky, you're just jealous."

"What do I have to be jealous of?" Mark scoffed, leaning across the table to kiss Aimee.

Roger made a face.

"Eew, gross," he whined in a fake little kid voice. He turned to Mimi. "Can't we skip the kissing scenes?"

She laughed, then kissed him yet again, wrapping one leg up around his waist.

"God," Roger moaned, pushing her away and reddening considerably.

"Children, please," Mark scolded, "Behave yourselves. This movie is strictly PG."

"Hey, Roger," Aimee called, grinning impishly. "I like this design for you new nursery." She held up a wrinkled copy of Play Boy.

"Roger!" Mimi glared at him for a moment, then lost it and burst into a fit of hysterical giggles.

Roger snatched the magazine out of Aimee's hands, quickly shoving it behind his back.

"It's for—you know, when we give the baby the sex talk!"

Everyone dissolved into laughter.

~~~**~~~

6:47 PM

The rain had started around three as a slight drizzle and had quickly progressed to a full blown thunderstorm, complete with blowing sheets of rain and ominous black clouds that flashed with thunder and lightning.

Roger had insisted that they drive to Scarsdale anyway, despite Mimi's protests. The conversation so far had been awkward and strained, and a light pattering of hail on the windshield and the swish of the wheels on the wet road was the only noise that filled the car after a while.

"Mimi?" Roger asked finally.

"What?"

"Do you. . .have any regrets?"

"About what?"

Roger shrugged, taking his eyes off the road for a moment to look at her.

"Us. This baby."

She looked at him thoughtfully for a moment, then sighed.

"Sure. But I have more hopes than regrets. So I guess I just have to believe that I'm doing the right thing." She paused for a moment, looking out the window. "I guess I never realized how much I wanted to have children until now. It was never really an option for me. But now—I don't know, maybe it's just the mothering instinct or something."

Roger nodded, and Mimi continued to stare out the window.

"Why do you ask?" she asked finally, "Do you?"

"Well. . ." he trailed off.

Mimi turned on him, suddenly angry.

"You do, don't you. You wouldn't ask otherwise. My God, Roger. . ." she laughed bitterly. "I'm so stupid. I should've known."

"Known what?" Roger snapped, his temper flaring.

"That I couldn't trust you. Couldn't believe in you." She was crying now, more scared than angry. "You always run away."

Roger turned back to look at her, to prove her wrong, his body jumping ahead of his mind, reflexes completely in control. He never saw the other car coming.

There was a loud crack and a shock wave ran through the car, sending it spinning into a ditch off the side of the road. In the back of his mind, Roger heard Mimi scream beside him, then his entire body exploded with pain.

He turned to look at her a second later, his heart freezing at the sight of blood. There was blood everywhere. On the seats and the floor and spreading quickly. He couldn't even tell if it was his or hers.

"Mimi. . ." Roger asked shakily. "What. . .you okay?"

She looked back at him, tears of pain streaming down her face.

"No. . .Roger. . .oh, God, it hurts. . ."

~~~**~~~

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