I'm Gonna Fly

Summary: Lily has led a not so pretty life and now she can only think of one way out and that way is to Fly.

Rating: R for mature themes and language.

Warning: This has suicide and cutting as a very prominent theme. If that offends you, I am warning you now. And unless your in a really freaked up situation that I don't even want to know about, some one is not holding a gun to your head forcing you to read my story. And if so I am flattered that the gunman is forcing you to read my story instead of another.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. J.K. Rowlings does. And I don't own I'm Gonna Fly. Sydney Forest does. But if you feel like suing go ahead I will laugh my head off and see if there are any hotties in the courtroom.

Chapter 10

With every leap of faith, I feel a little stronger.

James didn't think he'd ever been happier to hear Professor Binns dismiss a class in his life. And when you applied that to History of Magic, that was saying something. He and the other Marauders grabbed their bags and dashed for the door as typical. Well, minus Remus. He was still in the hospital wing as he always was the day after the full moon. Now, he finally had a chance to go check on Remus and Lily.

It surprised James how much he could worry about someone he didn't even know the last name of. But yet he did and if anything ever happened to her… He didn't think he could forgive himself. He felt strangely attached and drawn to her. But in her eyes he was still the enemy. Sure, she had agreed to live for a week and see if he could show her why life was worth living. Yet, there was something in the way she had looked at him when he had left the hospital wing to get some breakfast and go to class.

"So, what was her name again. Lyra?" Peter asked. James hadn't expected him to remember. Peter had always had a problem with names. James and Sirius had to make name tags for themselves and worn them for a good while in first year.

"It was Lily," Sirius replied. "And, Prongs, I've been meaning to ask you. Was last night a first attempt or has she been planning this for a while?"

James sighed. "I wish I could tell you it was the first time, Padfoot. I really do. But, from the looks of her wrist, it's been a problem for a while." Something about just saying that made the task in front of them seem so much bigger. The group turned the corner in silence and began the way to familiar walk down the stairs to the infirmary. The trio seemed to be trying to ingest the information that James had just offered and take it in heed as they attempted the task that lay before them.

"Er…Guys, I'm not sure we can saver her," Peter stated in a quiet voice.

"What?!?" If James was expecting a response from the Marauders, this was not it. They had helped him through being suicidal, helped Remus out when they had found out about him being a werewolf, helped Sirius through his little sisters death. If their was anything the Marauders know about it was the shit that can happen in your life and how friends could help each other out of it.

"James is right, Wormtail. We've got to help her. I mean we've never noticed her before so probably no one else has either. I mean if we don't, who will?" Sirius asked. James smiled appreciatively at him, and Sirius grinned back.

"But that's just it. We don't know her. We worked through it with James cause he was our friend." Peter replied.

"She's dying for a friend, in the most literal sense of the word. She needs us, Wormtail. We can't turn our back on her. That's not what were about." James retorted.

"And we're not group therapy! Prongs, just because you think she's hott you can't go head over heals for her!" Peter spat in response.

"I don't think she's hott! And even if I did, that's not why I want to save her! She is a human in case you didn't notice last night. That entitles her a shot at life or so you told me once. Unless, that was a lie." James' glare threw fire at his friend.

Peter held his gaze and glared right back. "I'm not saying that we should Arvada Kerdava her or take a knife to her or anything. All I'm saying is we saved her last night, and that was a close scrape. Some one could have died, Prongs, and it could have been you. I'm not gonna sit here and watch my friends throw their lives away because of some Gryfindor we don't even know the name of." Both glared at each other, clinging tight to their opinions. Anger seemed to flow around the two teens so palpable that you could reach out and touch it, feel it, taste it.

It was for that reason that Sirius cleared his throat and brought both of their gazes back to him. Both look slightly startled as if they had forgot she was here. He would have laughed if the circumstance were different, for if he laughed now he would most likely be hexed to kingdom come. "Guys, were here. Lets check on Remus first. Cause I'm sure that if he can remember what happened last night he's gonna feel guilty and want to meet her."

Both friends looked down at the floor guiltily, as if this hadn't occurred to either of them and was now hitting them full force. Their friend had almost killed an innocent girl and his best friend. True he didn't know what he was doing or have any control over his actions but knowing Remus, he wouldn't take that into account. "So," Sirius began cautiously, knowing that he was tread on dangerous ground. "You guys ready to go in?"

Upon receiving a nod from two of his fellow Marauders, he grasped the door pull with his left hand and yanked it open. The boys took a step toward Remus, who was sitting up and looked like he was being released. Remus looked up at them, as he usually did. That wasn't what scared the Marauders. It wasn't something that was there that chilled there blood. What scared them was what wasn't. He wasn't smiling.

All three fourteen-year-old boys darted across the wing to their friend's side. All where so preoccupied with getting to Remus that none of them noticed the vacant bed where a girl with red hair should have been. But as soon as they got to the bedside next to Remus, they wished they had stayed at the door. They wished they had stayed far enough back that they didn't have to look into his eyes.

Madam Pomfrey began to drone on about how he could go now and stayed out of trouble. But none of them were listening, and her message fell on deaf ears. They were all paying attention to Remus and what he was silently saying with his eyes. And it was powerful enough that it didn't have to be said with actual words. 'I would have killed them and there was nothing I could do about it.'

Yeah I know. It could be longer and it's bordering on a cliff-hanger but the good news! Yes there is good news. I am currently on spring break. Audible cheer rises from review section (Mainly from Ladybird, Neila, and Jennie.) Yes, yes. Well, anyway this means I can get a lot more writing done. But I won't post till I have 10. Remember that.

Flame Me—Thanx urs rock too!

starborn—Yes I wanna be just like you when I don't grow up.

CrazieBabieMeg—I will most likely take you up on that

Neila Nuruodo the Chiss—Isn't it? Lol.

Cessa—Ah but some of those are fun sometimes. They give you a break from the heavy stuff like this

KKDT—Lol. I try but you know. I don't have a lot of time usually.

River Goddess—ihahruhj hruawjtrf Thanx I will! Herjhnhjtnrkjetkjsenfv

Alriadne—Kool-aid, blow pops and a sharpie Marker.

Lamina Court—I know they are so cute and then u spend time with them instead of writing your story. Thanx for the input!

Hanna-chan—Right now. LoL

everblue3—Thanx I'll have Neila look it over for me. And I took your suggestion about the dialogue to heart.

EuGIeBeAr—Here's one with dialogue for you.