Sara Sidle
"No!" she screams as she sits bolt upright. Her heart thumps in her chest, her blood rushes in her ears. She wants to cry. That dream again. Always the same one. It will haunt her forever.
She sits back against the headboard and tries to pull herself together. She knows there is no use trying to go back to sleep now. In fact it will be a couple of days before her body lets her find that again. As her heart rate begins to slow and the blood no longer sounds like thunder in her ears, she looks around her. Her bedroom is a mess. There are forensic journals all over the floor and some on her bed. She picks one up and starts to leaf through it.
She leans over and switches on the police scanner beside her bed. Might as well see what this evenings shift has in store for her.
She smiles a sad smile. Why would anyone think she didn't have a life. She works more than half her day away, then comes home and reads about how to improve her work and listens to possible jobs she may pull at work. 'Oh yeah, this is living.'
Nick was right, she had to get out more. She had taken up his advice once. That had ended in disaster. Hank the skank! Still, one scumbag asshole was no reason to wipe off the rest of the human species. Maybe she should call someone to do something before shift. Maybe catch a movie.
She could call Cath.... No, she would be picking up Lindsey by now..... Besides, she and Catherine weren't exactly chummy, chummy. They worked together fine but sometimes she just rubbed Sara the wrong way.
Warrick was out of the question. They got on well now, but a social outing was probably not where their relationship was at right now. She could just imagine his expression if she was to call out of the blue and ask to go out with him.... It might just be worth it for the reaction. Of course, you can't see someone's face when you talk on the phone.
Nick? They had been out together a few times so that wouldn't be a problem. He knew that romance was not on the agenda and he always made her feel better. Why not. She reaches for her cell phone (always close at hand in case work calls her in) and dials his number. It rings.......... Damn, went to message bank. Oh well. He was probably asleep anyway.
That left Gil Grissom..... No way!!!!! Not even going to open that Pandora's box. Wow, how awkward had work been since she asked him out to dinner that time. Besides, Gil wasn't a movie kind of guy. Not if they were in color anyway.
But he was the most amazing person she had ever met. She knows her feelings for him are unreciprocated. But she can't help it. Everyday he does or says something that just stuns her. He was brilliant.
But was brilliant enough? She had asked herself that question so many times. Were her feelings for Gil love, or admiration? As usual she couldn't answer. It didn't matter anyway. She was though chasing him. It was time to find meaning in her life. She didn't know how, but she was going to try.
She switched off her scanner and turned on the radio. She got up and picked up all the magazines and packed them away in her cupboard. That was a start. A small start but a start none the less.
Time to go and see a movie. Ok so she will go on her own, but at least she would be doing something that wasn't work related. 'My life starts now!'
"No!" she screams as she sits bolt upright. Her heart thumps in her chest, her blood rushes in her ears. She wants to cry. That dream again. Always the same one. It will haunt her forever.
She sits back against the headboard and tries to pull herself together. She knows there is no use trying to go back to sleep now. In fact it will be a couple of days before her body lets her find that again. As her heart rate begins to slow and the blood no longer sounds like thunder in her ears, she looks around her. Her bedroom is a mess. There are forensic journals all over the floor and some on her bed. She picks one up and starts to leaf through it.
She leans over and switches on the police scanner beside her bed. Might as well see what this evenings shift has in store for her.
She smiles a sad smile. Why would anyone think she didn't have a life. She works more than half her day away, then comes home and reads about how to improve her work and listens to possible jobs she may pull at work. 'Oh yeah, this is living.'
Nick was right, she had to get out more. She had taken up his advice once. That had ended in disaster. Hank the skank! Still, one scumbag asshole was no reason to wipe off the rest of the human species. Maybe she should call someone to do something before shift. Maybe catch a movie.
She could call Cath.... No, she would be picking up Lindsey by now..... Besides, she and Catherine weren't exactly chummy, chummy. They worked together fine but sometimes she just rubbed Sara the wrong way.
Warrick was out of the question. They got on well now, but a social outing was probably not where their relationship was at right now. She could just imagine his expression if she was to call out of the blue and ask to go out with him.... It might just be worth it for the reaction. Of course, you can't see someone's face when you talk on the phone.
Nick? They had been out together a few times so that wouldn't be a problem. He knew that romance was not on the agenda and he always made her feel better. Why not. She reaches for her cell phone (always close at hand in case work calls her in) and dials his number. It rings.......... Damn, went to message bank. Oh well. He was probably asleep anyway.
That left Gil Grissom..... No way!!!!! Not even going to open that Pandora's box. Wow, how awkward had work been since she asked him out to dinner that time. Besides, Gil wasn't a movie kind of guy. Not if they were in color anyway.
But he was the most amazing person she had ever met. She knows her feelings for him are unreciprocated. But she can't help it. Everyday he does or says something that just stuns her. He was brilliant.
But was brilliant enough? She had asked herself that question so many times. Were her feelings for Gil love, or admiration? As usual she couldn't answer. It didn't matter anyway. She was though chasing him. It was time to find meaning in her life. She didn't know how, but she was going to try.
She switched off her scanner and turned on the radio. She got up and picked up all the magazines and packed them away in her cupboard. That was a start. A small start but a start none the less.
Time to go and see a movie. Ok so she will go on her own, but at least she would be doing something that wasn't work related. 'My life starts now!'