Chapter Twelve
In the early spring the court of Tortall made a tour of the realm to show the newest Conte her future kingdom. Alanna rode by her king's side, and listened to the protests of conservatives who believed that a woman could never rule with disgust.
"How can they say that?" she protested to Thayet as they took advantage of the bathes of their host. "I mean, every one knows that you're just as much in charge as Jonathon is, and Daine saved all of their lives barely ten years ago…"
"And then there's the Lioness," Thayet interrupted her. "Without whom I wouldn't have my husband and the realm of Tortall wouldn't exist," Alanna glared and flicked water at her.
When the parade passed through Pirate's Swoop Alanna left it, after fare- welling Jonathon privately in a cave down on the beach. Over the next few months she attended to the more mundane duties involved in running a fief, duties that George usually took care of, but her husband was often away, strange reports kept coming in from his spies, and more often than not he was required to travel to be properly informed on the situation.
Alanna immersed herself in her work, trying to forget about how much she missed Jon. It wasn't easy; every time she turned a corner there seemed to be something that reminded her of him. She supposed it was only to be expected; he was the king, but she thought it was unfair of him to be constantly reminding her that they weren't together.
Then in early autumn the summons came, asking her to return to the palace. She rode out the next day, telling the knights who usually rode with her to follow at their own pace. It only took her two days to reach Corus, but as she rode up to the palace she noticed that she was incurring an unusual number of curious looks from passers by. Gary was there to meet her when she arrived at the stables, and he was frowning too.
"Jon's in his study," he told her. "You need to see him,"
"What's going on Gary?" she demanded, swinging down from her horses.
"Just go and see him," her friend told her, looking worried. She looked at him as she walked away, frowning.
"Jonathon," she called as she knocked on the door to his study. "Can I come in?"
She was surprised when her father opened the door. "Myles?" she asked. "What's happening?"
"I'll let Jonathon explain," he told her, stepping out of the door and holding it open to let her in. She smiled at him and he touched her arm fondly before letting the door close. She turned to face her lover.
Jonathon was sitting at his desk, holding a sheet of paper in his hand. He looked up with a confused expression on his face.
She hurried across the room to his side, reaching out to touch his face. "Jonathon, what's going on?"
He held out the paper, obviously wanting her to read it. Alanna glanced down, began to read… and stopped, as she understood what was wrong.
"There's no way it could have been natural?" she asked.
Jonathon shook his head. "She was in perfect health, other than the fact she's dead… she ought to be a healthy as you or me,"
"What do you think it is then?" she asked.
He ran his hands through his hair. "I don't know," he replied, sounding harassed. "I've been waiting for months for something to happen, but now it has I have no idea how to deal with it,"
"No," she agreed.
"What am I supposed to do then?" he asked. "How can I do anything if I don't know how to do it?"
"Maybe this isn't one of those things you can know what to do about. Maybe you just have to keep going and whatever is supposed to happen will happen," She backed away and sat down in the other chair as she said it, thoughtfully holding her hand over her mouth.
"If we lived our lives like that Alanna nothing would ever change," Jonathon replied.
"We'd still feel wouldn't we?" she argued. "And if we could feel without any other complications we could still live,"
"There are always other complications," Jon said. He turned away from her.
"What are we talking about now?" she asked, refusing to leave.
"I don't know, the fact that people die, that people live,"
"Jonathon, are you aiming to be raised to divinity?"
He laughed shortly and then stood up. "I'm sorry," he muttered.
"It's alright,"
He looked up. "I missed you,"
"I missed you too,"
"Then will you kiss me?"
There eyes met and he offered a smile. He walked out from behind the desk, watching her intently. She found herself stepping forward without even thinking about it. They met half way and he ran his fingers over her cheek, gently brushing her lip with his thumb.
"Please kiss me,"
She kissed him.
"Love you Alanna,"
"Love you Jon,"
He put his hands under her chin and lifted her face. "You and I will always be together through this won't we?"
"Of course we will," she replied, at the same time making the same vow in her mind.
"And everything will be alright," she added.
"Everything will be alright," Jonathon repeated.
"And whatever happened to Delia will just make itself apparent in time, and until then there's nothing we can do,"
"It shouldn't have to be like this,"
She looked at the floor. "No," she agreed. "They shouldn't,"
"Are you still thinking about that?" he asked.
"I can't help it Jon," she defended herself. "Every time I think about it I feel guilty, and I come up with so many other things I could have done instead,"
He put his arms around her and pulled her body into his. "And did you ever think to try not thinking about it my Lioness?" he asked teasingly.
She let him kiss her and then ran her fingers over his lips. "You know, when I hear you talking like this there's just one word that comes to my mind," she tilted her head to the side.
"What's that?" Jon asked patiently.
"Hypocrite," she told him, ducking the punch he aimed at her and giggling.
Jonathon smiled, kissed her and then glanced away. "Perhaps we ought to go to dinner now,"
Alanna glanced out the window. "Yes," she agreed.
"You're back," Thayet greeted her with a smile. "Just wait to you see Tara; she's the most beautiful thing,"
Alanna smiled. "I believe you," she said, and then, after looking around, "your family seems fairly diminished,"
"I think you mean running late," Thayet corrected her. Alanna raised her eyebrows. "Liam and Jasson are somewhere, doing something terribly important they assure me; Lianne is with them, and I really don't know why Roald and Shinko haven't arrived,"
Alanna looked towards the doors as she said that, and smiled as they opened for the crown prince and his wife a moment later. Shinkokami looked apologetic.
"Tara was upset," she explained. "She wouldn't let go of Roald and so we couldn't leave until she calmed down," Alanna only half heard what she was saying; mostly she was watching Roald absently pull out his wife's chair and then sink down at the table; the effort he made not to rest his head on his hands blatantly obvious. Alanna nibbled absently on her lip and watched as he looked up, and forced her eyes onto his. He blinked and gave her a tired looking smile. Alanna smiled back, and looked away so that he wouldn't see the worry on her face.
"Don't worry," Thayet was telling Shinko. Everyone here understands what it's like to have a young child, so you don't need to apologize. You three on the other hand…" she added as her other wayward children hurried in, "promised me you would be on time young man," she addressed Liam, who looked to Roald for support. His brother smiled.
"They were doing something very important Mama," he told Thayet, who sighed.
"You're supposed to be on my side now," she told her eldest.
"Sorry Mama," he replied meekly. Jonathon hid a smile behind his dinner. Alanna suddenly heard Gary's voice in her mind, "But it was important Aunty," speaking to Queen Lianne once when they were trying to get out of a punishment for being out after lights out. She smiled too.
The door banged, and Alanna, who was watching Roald again, saw the crown prince jump in his seat and glance over in that direction. Alanna decided that Roald was terrible company when he was jumpy; his behaviour was making her twitch too.
"Could you let me know when you go to dinner next time?" Gary asked. "I'm not all that fond of your office that I like going there when you're not there, and I have some papers that need your immediate attention,"
"Do you remember what fun is Gary?" Alanna asked. He glared at her.
"Would you like something to eat Sir Gareth?" Thayet asked.
"Of course he would," Jonathon told her. "Bring your papers here Gary, and have a snack while I look at them,"
"Would you mind if Alanna and I came to visit you after dinner?" Thayet asked Shinko. "You can show her your beautiful daughter," Shinko smiled. The younger boys rolled their eyes. Gary glanced up and shared a smile with Alanna. Roald shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Jonathon put his hand on his son's shoulder and spoke to him in a voice to low for Alanna to hear. Roald shook his head and turned his attention to his dinner. Jonathon looked up and his eyes met Alanna's. She smiled at him.
"Are these really so important?" Jon asked Gary.
"Yes!"
Alanna leaned over and read the papers over Jonathon's shoulder. She looked up at Gary, raising her eyebrows.
"You're just out for something to eat aren't you?" she commented. Gary opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by the king.
"Can I have something to sign these with Gary?" Gary stuck his tongue out at Alanna as he offered a pen to Jonathon.
"Thank you," the king told him, handing the papers back. Gary looked reluctantly at the door and Thayet burst out laughing. Gary turned to look at her reproachfully, and Alanna had time to compose herself.
"Sit," Jonathon instructed Gary.
"Can you come with me please Roald?" Jonathon asked as they were finishing their meal. "I have some things I could use your help with,"
Roald nodded mutely. Alanna frowned, and then looked expectantly at Thayet. The queen smiled and got to her feet, beckoning.
Tara was every bit as beautiful as Thayet had promised, but she didn't seem to know it, or if she did, she didn't care. She was crying when they arrived, and nothing anyone could think of would console her. Alanna held her for a little while, but she didn't even acknowledge that she had changed arms. Eventually Thayet and Alanna retreated, and Thayet went off to visit the rider barracks, to get a report from the group that had just returned.
Alanna went to Jonathon's office. She knocked on the door before she entered, and smiled at both king and prince.
"Are you alright?" she asked Roald. He nodded, and Alanna decided to leave it at that. Roald gave her his seat and went to the window, staring out at the courtyard below.
Alanna and Jonathon made small talk for a while, until Roald suddenly jerked forward. Alanna turned to look at him.
"Roald…" she began. He turned to look at her.
"I'm alright Aunty," he told her. "Really," he sounded different, like perhaps he really was alright, and Alanna wondered what had changed. He came over and hugged her briefly, which just confused her more; Roald's hugs were usually reserved for very special occasions, and yet she'd been given two in the last year. Briefly she contemplated how sad it was that things that should be good worried her.
Jonathon was speaking to his son, who was shaking his head vehemently.
I don't know Papa," he told Jonathon, "so I can't tell you,"
Jonathon gave him a look.
"I'm sorry," Roald added. "You don't know how sorry," He looked at the window. "I need to go now," He was gone before Jon had a chance to say anything else.
Jonathon looked over at Alanna. "What do you think that was about?" he asked. Alanna was shaking her head, but then stopped, and turned to look at the door. Suddenly she was filled with a creeping spreading dread, invading her body and filling every inch of it with a chill. She slipped into Jonathon's arms and felt them fold around her, burying her head against his chest even when she heard movement in the shadows behind her.
Jonathon's muscles tensed, and she reluctantly removed her face from the warm comfort of his shirt and turned to face the door.
"It is time,"
Alanna slowly looked up into Kalasin's eyes, eyes so like Jonathon's, and yet suddenly so foreign that if it weren't for Jonathon's body Alanna would have stepped back out of instinct. She felt her lover's arms tighten around her, and would have looked at him if her eyes hadn't been trapped by Kally's.
Then Kalasin looked away from her, down to the child in her arms, obscured from sight by a blanket. Alanna didn't try to get a better look at the baby, guessing that it was the source of her fear, and of Kalasin's.
She looked up at Jonathon, and found his eyes locked on his daughter's. The room was silent for a long time, Alanna waiting patiently for this silent confrontation to end. Eventually Jon bowed. Kally inclined her head just a little.
"Are you ready?" she asked. Jonathon looked at Alanna. She smiled at him.
"Yes, let's go," she replied. Kalasin nodded softly, turned on her heels and lead the way down the stairs, leaving Jonathon and Alanna to a moment of privacy.
She turned to face him and looked up into his eyes. He held her tightly for a moment, and kissed her before taking her hand and following Kalasin.
Somehow there was no one around to impede their progress through the palace until they reached the very doors of their destination. Kalasin turned back by the temple doors to look behind her. Alanna followed her eyes to see Thayet and Roald, and a group of the private inner circle of the court. Kalasin was watching Roald, and Alanna could see that the prince's eyes were on his sister too. She heard Jonathon say something quietly to his daughter, and Kally turned away and stepped into the temple. The doors closed behind Alanna and Jon as they followed her.
Once inside Alanna stopped for a moment to look around. As the palace had been, the temple was completely deserted, and that had never happened within Alanna's memory. She looked up at Kally, and saw that the princess was beside the doors to the Chamber of the Ordeal. Alanna suppressed a gulp. She had known what was coming, but until now she'd managed to hide it from herself, and delay the inevitable fear that came whenever she thought of the chamber. She felt Jon's comforting hand in hers, and knew he was feeling the same way.
"You don't have to come," he told her. Alanna looked at him. Then she laughed.
"You can't get rid of me that easily," she replied. "We'll be together through all of this, remember?"
Jon gave a rueful smile. "I knew that was going to come back to haunt me," he noted. "Alright then Lady Knight. Together we go,"
The doors to the Chamber were open. Kalasin stood by them, face as blank as ever before. She looked at them and Jonathon nodded.
The Chamber was dark, and empty. Alanna let go of Jonathon's hand and walked around, carefully. It wasn't cold as it had been the last time she was in there; it wasn't anything really, just a little dusty.
Jonathon sucked in his breath behind her and she heard the sound of his hand going to his sword. She spun around, reaching for her sword, and then dropped it as she saw what Jonathon had reacted to.
"Alex?" she asked, her voice coming out as little more than a squeak.
Alexander of Tirragon nodded politely at her, and then bowed to Jonathon.
"Your Majesty,"
Jonathon stared at his former friend in shock. Alanna stepped up to stand beside him, knowing that her eyes were unnaturally wide.
Alex turned to look at her. His mouth opened slightly as if he wanted to say something, but whatever it was he couldn't get it out. Finally he looked over at Kalasin and shook his head a little.
"Would you like a seat?" he asked. "This may take a while,"
Jonathon found his voice and accepted for both of them. Alex nodded and motioned for them to sit. An oddly style sofa had appeared behind them, and Alanna allowed her legs to collapse onto it. Alex was seated across from them on a stiff backed chair when she turned around, and she noted the Chamber's attempted subtlety with amusement.
"I'm going to tell you some things that must be explained, should you hope to win the battle that is coming," Alex told them. "I'm to be the one to tell you this because I can't be on either side, and the Elemental's have decreed that the Gods and their enemies can have no direct input into this contest,"
"Then why are we here?" Jonathon asked.
"Because I can be here untampered with by either side, and both sides would try to affect me if I wasn't. They're like that sometimes. This is the home of the Elementals on this world, and so we are safe here,"
Jonathon nodded comprehension, but Alanna could see that his brain was having a hard time rearranging itself around this new information. She reached out for his hand.
When she looked up she was startled to see Alex looking at her and Jon's intertwined fingers, and even more puzzled by the expression on his face. Something like… longing, and regret. She coughed, bringing his attention back to them.
"Well anyway, have you worked out by now what happened last winter?" he asked.
Alanna shook her head. She didn't want to think about it.
Jonathon nodded to Alex. "We know,"
"That was necessary," Alex told them. "He couldn't die until everything else was in place, but if he had lived like he wanted to everything would have been wrong. So the Elementals did what they had to to ensure that when it finally came down to it the setting would be right,"
Alanna suddenly decided to ask a question that had bothered her for a long time. "What are the Elementals?" she asked.
"The oldest life known," Alex replied. "The parents and aunts and uncles of your Gods, and their adversaries. They interfere with their children only when the future is in danger. It actually happens more often than you'd think," he noted. "Does that answer your question?"
Alanna nodded; she really didn't trust herself to speak.
"And now the future is in danger again," Alex continued. "What you call the Immortals war, the escape of Urasoe, that was the beginning; she being Chaos is not always able to wait for the full scheme of her allies to come to fruition,"
Jonathon raised his eyebrows delicately.
"The point is the time for preparation is up. There will be a battle, you and your allies versus those who are dead who have been returned to their bodies; you two will confront Roger, and everything will be decided. You need to gather all the allies you can find Jonathon; this battle is going to be bigger than anything you've ever dreamed of,"
Jonathon rubbed his forehead. "There has to be more to it than that," he said slowly.
"What do you want to know?" Alex asked.
"I just don't understand how all these things join together," Jon replied. "And why now and why us?"
"You have powerful blood Jonathon," Alex told him. "Unhampered your bloodline would have affected almost as much damage as the enemies of the Gods, for Chaos runs in it. But that blood has been controlled, and diluted, until the power is only a little more than what a powerful human mage would have,"
When Alanna and Jonathon exchanged as puzzled look, he added, "The only reason that Numair Salamin seems more powerful is because of the education he has had,"
"What about Alanna?" Jonathon asked.
"She has the magic of two very powerful mages in one body," Alex explained. "Which ought to explain the why now as well; you two are perfect for one role, and your children," nodding to Jonathon, "are capable of doing what has to be done,"
Jonathon frowned and opened his mouth. "Don't ask me Jonathon," Alex told him. "I can't tell you,"
"You shouldn't even him that," a voice drawled from the doorway. "You're betraying everything we worked for,"
Alex got to his feet, a look of concern crossing his face. "What are you doing here?" he asked.
"What, not happy to see me Lover?" Delia asked as he took his seat. "Did you know we were sleeping together the entire time you and I were?" she asked Jonathon conversationally.
Alanna ground her teeth. "And you have the nerve to call me a slut?" she asked.
"I never claimed to be in love with any of the men I slept with," Delia replied smoothly. "Much less three at the same time,"
"Actually, I think you just did," Alanna replied.
"Did what?"
Jonathon looked away to hide his smile, and Alex, producing himself a new seat, seemed to be doing the same thing.
"Never mind," he told Delia.
"I do mind," she replied waspishly.
Jonathon sighed. "Alex asked a very valid question," he noted. "What are you doing here?"
Delia sniffed. "Well, apparently I'm no longer allowed to have a side in this conflict, but what he's doing is totally… wrong,"
Alanna gave her an exasperated look. Alex and Jonathon looked from one woman to the other and then began talking.
"Every single ally you can get," Alex told Jonathon. "Cathark, Galla, Scanra, the Copper Isles, the Yanamis, Tusaine, Tyra, the Bazhir, the Shang,"
"Are you crazy?" Alanna asked, forgetting about her argument with her second greatest mortal enemy. "Bazhir, Shang, Yanamis, yes. Cathark, Galla and Tyra, maybe. But the others, you of all people know that the Copper Isles will never ally with Jonathon; we just spent about five years at war with Scanra, and you fought in the Tusaine campaign,"
Alex wiped his hand wearily across his face. "I know that," he replied. "But they'll do it Jon, all of them will; they will because they have to; they'll know that. The battle," he added. "Six weeks, you know the place," it wasn't a question. Then he turned to look at Kally.
"You know what you have to do?" he asked. She nodded.
"Yes," the voice made caused a chill to run through Alanna's body. It was like Kalasin was gone, completely gone. Alanna grabbed Jonathon's hand and squeezed it, feeling the pressure returned. She looked at Alex, and saw him turning away. Kalasin walked to the door, and stood waiting quietly beside it. Delia was looking expectantly at Alex.
He looked over at her and nodded. "Good luck," he told Jonathon and Alanna. Jon nodded. Alex smiled slightly and turned away. Alanna looked at him for a second and then let go of Jon's hand and ran after him. He turned to look at her, and she saw the surprise in his face. It startled her, and she stopped for a moment.
Alex looked away from her. "If you're going to ask me why I'm helping you…" he began.
Alanna flung her arms around him. "I wanted to apologize," she told him, bursting into tears suddenly. "For everything. For cheating you in our fight, and killing you," she felt him wince against her. "And for everything else too,"
Delia's cruel laugh cut out suddenly, and at the same time Alanna felt Alex putting his arms around her. She looked up at him, and found that he was looking down at her with a question in his eyes.
"You did what you had to do," he told her. "But I… I put my ambitions before my friendships, and ended up trying to kill the people who I should have been helping. I would have killed you, if you hadn't done what you did. So I want to know, can you forgive me?"
Alanna stared at him in shock, realising that this was the first time she'd seen Alex show true remorse. The last time he'd been even remotely like this was after Frances died, and Alex had been too sick to attend the funeral.
"I don't blame you," she told him. His eyebrows shot up. She chuckled. "Not to say that I didn't, but I don't anymore,"
Alex smiled. "Alright,"
"I can't say all the things to you that I want," Alanna told him. 'So I need you to tell me whether we'll ever see each other again,"
Alex shook his head. "I don't know," he replied. "But I think that we will ,"
"Take it," he whispered. She slid her blade into his chest and took Lightening from his hand as he fell.
The shock of memory flashed through her, and she hissed through her teeth to try and block it out. She heard Jonathon's feet behind her, and then he was taking her from Alex, into his own arms. The two men made eye contact.
"She's right you know," Jonathon told him.
Roald reached the door before the others, in time to close it and stop them from following. His mother looked at him in puzzlement, and he looked away, resting his forehead against the door, trying to block out the image that had been playing over and over in his brain since it had happened.
A timid touch to his back made him aware of Shinko's presence, and he turned to look at her, grateful for her love. She was carrying Tara, but when he looked at them the baby reached out her tiny arms in demand. Roald took her and held her close to his body, rocking her gently more for his benefit than for hers.
For about five minutes it was like everyone expected Alanna and Jonathon to reappear instantly, but slowly they began to fade to the sides, taking advantages of the couches placed against the walls in this part of the palace. Only Thayet remained waiting by the door, and Roald knew he was going to have to say something to his mother.
He had planned to return Tara to her mother, but as soon as he started to move towards his wife the little princess began to whimper, and he resigned himself to her company with a great relief.
"Mama?" he addressed Thayet as he approached where she stood. She turned to look at him, the smile on her lips fading when she saw the expression on his face.
"What is it?" she asked.
"This will be difficult for you to understand," he told her. "But you mustn't touch Kally or her baby. It would be best if you didn't associate with them at all, but at least don't touch her,"
"Never?" Thayet asked.
He shook his head, wishing he knew how to do this so it would cause less pain. "Just for now," he said. "When this is over… well, we'll see,"
Thayet nodded, but her face was blank and dazed.
"I'm sorry," Roald told her. Tara cooed and Thayet looked at her with a small smile.
"Will you lat me hold you at least?" she asked the baby. Roald handed his daughter over and backed up as Thayet rocked Tara back and forward gently.
"Babies are probably the cleverest people alive, aren't they?" Daine commented from behind him. He gave a bleak nod and turned to face the wildmage. Daine smiled.
"Are you alright?" she asked him. He smiled sadly
"No,"
"Fair enough," she replied.
He frowned at her, trying to decipher what she meant.
"How much do you know?"
Daine laughed. "Not a lot. Ma only told me to keep an eye on you and Kalasin, and not to interfere with the king or Alanna,"
Roald nodded, and glanced at the ground. Daine's grey eyes watched him.
"It's going to be bad, isn't it?" she asked softly. He just nodded. She stepped forward and hugged him briefly.
The others stepped forward as the doors opened. Jonathon looked at Alanna and she gave him a small reassuring smile before looking around them. Roald had obviously spoken to his mother while they were in the chamber, because Thayet didn't try to speak to Kalasin, and instead stood watching her daughter and holding Tara. Roald and Daine were watching them too, but they both looked like they understood, and wanted something to hold onto.
Jonathon turned to his cousin. "I need you to find George Cooper, wherever he is, and bring him here, now. And Myles to my office as soon as humanly possible; Then summon my advisors,"
"What's going on?" Gary asked. Jonathon ignored him and kept walking. Gary looked at Alanna.
"Do it please," she begged him. Gary nodded, and hurried off towards the stables. Raoul swore and followed him. Alanna looked at Roald and Kally. Both of them nodded and set off after their father. Alanna followed.
"I'm sorry Gary," Jonathon told his cousin later. The big knight waved him off.
"It's nothing," he replied lightly. Alanna watched approvingly.
"So are you going to tell us what's going on Jon?" Raoul asked. Jonathon glanced at him, and then looked round the table at the rest.
"Alright," he began. "But keep in mind that I don't really know very much, and that some of what I'm going to tell you is what I've actually been told; some is guess work."
"We have to fight Roger," he announced simply. "We have to fight him and his army, and we have to destroy them. I know most of you thought he was dead…" he glanced at Roald and Kally, but so briefly that Alanna wouldn't have seen it if she hadn't been doing the same thing. Roald met her eyes, but Kalasin looked away.
"…but he's not, and since he should be, we have to kill him," Jonathon continued. "There's more of course, the gist of which being that the God's are fighting with their brothers and sisters, and we're basically just the pawns in that battle. That bit of information by the way," he noted, "Will not leave this room. I don't need another religious debate on my hands right now,"
"Is it just me," Gary asked. "Or have we just about expended our time quota on killing Duke Roger?"
Raoul groaned. "Do you have to?" he asked.
"I'm merely suggesting that we ought to make sure we do a proper job this time," Gary protested. Alanna felt Jonathon's foot gently brush hers under the table. She looked up into his eyes and saw the concern sparkling there.
"We'll tell them later," she whispered into his mind. His eyes closed for a second but then they opened and he turned to the table.
"I know this is confusing," he told them all. "But you have to trust me. We can win this; we just need help," he turned to Gary. "I need you to dispatch a message to all our neighbouring countries, asking for their help. I've been told by a fairly reliable source that they'll give it," His eyes met hers again, and she gave him a small smile. "And to the rest of you," he continued, "I need you to begin preparing. Contact your own factions; mobilise them; you have four weeks," he lifted his hand in dismissal and most of the council stood up and left. Thayet gave Jonathon a questioning glance, and he smiled and nodded towards the door. Alanna knew the queen was going to her children.
Eventually the only ones left in the chamber were she and Jon, and Gary and Raoul. Raoul and Gary were watching them expectantly.
"What haven't you told us yet?" Gary asked. Alanna winced and saw Jon doing the same.
"We're your friends,' Raoul added. "Please, whatever it is, you owe us,"
"Alex," Alanna whispered.
"What?" the two shocked voices rang out at the exact same time.
"It was Alex in the Chamber, who told us what we had to do," Jonathon explained.
"I need to sit," Gary breathed, and collapsed into a chair. Raoul was staring at them.
"And you trust him?" he asked. "You're going to risk all our lives, because he told you so!"
Alanna closed her eyes in an effort to stop herself from crying. She felt a sudden pressure on her hand and looked into Jonathon's eyes.
"Yes, we do," he told Raoul, not taking his eyes off her for one moment. "And we are,"
Alanna looked up at the two people who, other than Jon and George, were her closest friends. Both of them were watching her, and her hand in Jon's. She felt herself blushing, and cursed under her breath.
"It's alright," Gary told her. "We're not stupid either. Most of the time,"
Raoul looked guilty. "Sorry 'lana," he muttered. "I know… well I don't know, but if you think it's alright," He shot a glare at Gary, who was doubling over in laughter.
"You're terrible," Jon told his cousin, standing up and pulling Alanna to her feet with him. Gary gave a mocking bow.
"We need to go and start getting things organised, so we'll leave you to it," he told them. "Now say good night Raoul,"
Raoul kissed Alanna's cheek and gave a half wave. "Goodnight," he repeated as he closed the door behind them.
Jonathon put his arms around her.
"What are we going to do Lady Knight?" he asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "But we'll manage,"
"My family…" he began.
"Ssh," she replied. "They'll be alright,"
"What will Lianne do if none of us come back?" he asked.
"What?" she asked, not comprehending.
"Roald and Liam and Jasson are all knights or knights to be; Kalsain's too integral a part of this not to be there, and Thayet… I can't ask her not to go; I can't,"
Alanna heard the emotion in his voice and fell in love with him all over again. "Oh Jon," she whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck. He nuzzled her hair.
"This is different to the Immortal's war," he murmured. "Then it was everybody's problem. This is personal, and I don't want her to risk her life for it,"
"Jon, she's your wife. Things that are personal to you are personal to her too,"
"I don't want her to die; I can't stand the thought of her dying," he repeated. "Every time I fight, I know that even if I die, even if you die, she'll still be there, and it makes me feel better somehow,"
Alanna smiled. "I know what you mean. It's comforting to know that if you die there'll be someone left that loves you," Jon nodded mutely.
"Well if this makes you feel better, I'll love you always whether I'm dead or alive," she told him. He nuzzled into her hair.
"It does. Thank you,"
They walked over to the window and looked out. The sky was red. Alanna sighed.
"That's too beautiful to mean death,"
Jon pulled her in closer.
She stood in the shadow of an archway, staring out into the courtyard without seeing anything of it. Her heart was sick; everything was wrong, and the sickness was consuming her. She was paralysed, unable to move or to scream or even to make a sound. All she wanted was sleep, but sleep couldn't come to her where she was now, now that she knew her fate, knew that no matter what happened she was bound to her son, and would go with him no matter what. She couldn't even see any more; everything was gone, and she was alone.
"We need to talk," she closed her eyes and tensed at his voice.
"We need to talk," Roald told Kalasin. He saw her stiffen and winced internally.
"Alright," she replied, turning to face him. Her face was pale.
"Are you alright?" he asked.
She nodded.
He closed his eyes. "Please Kally, can't you even talk to me?"
"You don't know," she replied, and while her face remained blank there were tears running down her cheeks. "You can't know,"
"Not if you don't tell me," he cried. "Just tell me you're still in there Kally; just say I,"
"I…" She looked straight into his eyes and for a moment communication flashed between them.
"I don't want you to know,"
But he knew already, and they both knew it. So he just nodded.
"I promise I'll take care of you always,"
Um, this chapter has been rewritten so many times that I'm not entirely sure how much sense it makes, but all the important bits are covered. Just to let you know, the next chapter will be the last one, except the epilogue, and, since I'm guessing that after you read the next chapter you won't be reading that, I'll just say thank you for reading now. Oh, and if you feel like it, I'd love to hear some guesses on what's going to happen.