Things I should Have Told Her.
FoxayFan-girl, I have good and bad news for you.The good news is just like I've said before I'm thinking of possible stories for "Foxay" but while they might be mentioned in this story, they won't be in it.But take the satisfaction in knowing that they are together even though they aren't mentioned! latz.
She slept restlessly in the uncomfortable hotel bed images running, rampidlly through head as she tossed and turned.
Flashback
"I told you if you couldn't handel this problem of yours you couldn't live here!"Charity thundered as she followed him into the livingroom.
"I told you , I didn't have a God damn problem...now where's my son?" Jackson questioned as he seated himself, down on the couch.
Charity glared at him, as she stood."do you know what time it is? I'll tell you it's two o'clock in the mourning your son...is asleep in bed, where he needs to be."she took a deep breath as she foccused upon him, folding her arms."and I think you should leave."
"me?"he snickered loosely.
"yes you."Charity snapped, as Jackson's eyes met with hers he looked at her for a moment before standing slowly and walking to where she was.
"what's the matter Charity,"he smiled as he continue"we were so good together...remember?" he asked, while walking closer towards her.
Good together, that's what she thought they were...that's what she forced herself and everyone to believe but their was more to this than the picture perfect familly.
"good?"Charity repeated as she rose her voice."yeah, Jackson we were great together so great that you thought it was okay, to hit me."Charity turned to him more"remeber that!?"she yelled,"you threw me to the floor and started hitting me, I had to say all of these were accidents...just because you love me right?"she nodded, trying to keep calm so she wouldn't wake Daniel.
"I never did that to hurt you, we've talked about that...I just do it because I love you so much and I'm just scared to loose you."
She nodded quietly, as she backed away from him.
"you know I love you, Charity."he moved closer to her trying to get her into an embrace.
Charity moved away, as she slapped him across the face."don't you dare touch me again!"she felt her whole entire body shake with anger, as she hit him and watched Jackson rub his jaw.
His eyes began to fill with anger, as his hollow heavy footsteps made his way back to her.He was drunk again, she knew it, when was it when he wasn't.Before she knew it he grabbed her and began to jar her violently."who the hell do you think you are!?" he roared, as rose his hands to her.
//////////////////////////////
Charity rose abruply, in a cold sweat.Quickly she got up from her bed to check on Daniel, who was sleeping quietly jumping from left to right in his bed, roughling the sheets as he did such while closely making his way off the bed.
The sun graced this place lightly, as warm summer winds blew softly making the grass sway back and forth.He knelt down tracing the letters of her name, with his fingertips while placing daisies down onto the light green grass.He'd been here so many times before, just to see her and assure himself she was okay but he couldn't speak, he didn't know what to tell her.He never deserved her love, he knew that well now remembering all the times he'd done her wrong and all the times... her heart so innocent and forgiving would always let him back in but she was gone now, leaving Miguel's heart dark and bitter full of regret.
"I've done allot of things in my life that I'm not content with..."he began as he spoke softly, he looked onto the tombstone memories of when he burried her flashed through his head, how dark and alone he felt when she left him alone in this cruel world.How angry he was that someone could tear someone as young as her away from a world she would never get the chance to expirience, but as he recollected he didn't think she needed to expirience something so cruel and unforgiving.It was hard, but over the years it forced himself to be at peace with it.
" I hurt allot of people that I loved,"he began the words even know hard to release."but I just wanted you to know you were never what went wrong with my life, I know I must have made you feel that way, and I'm so sorry."his voice began to weaken, as his eyes began fill with tears of anger.He never dreamed this would be so hard, so difficult to say what he's really felt, what his heart so protectively held along the years"I loved you, so much...I had so many hopes for you;I knew you would've---made me so happy"he whispered, as he gathered his emotions.
"you've changed me, so much, in so many ways...and I'm going to try like hell to make you proud of me."he quickly silenced himslef, as he looked onto his daughter's grave one last time." I love you, Maria."he stood, finally bringing himself to walk away.
"I don't get it Mommy"Daniel pouted in his car seat."why did we have to be so far from Daddy anyways, why do we have to go to Harmony?"
Charity sighed deeply, as she kept her eyes on the road."well, for many reasons Danny..."she trailed"it's where Mommy grew up, it's where her Mommy is..."Charity trailed trying to make Harmony seem more appealing to her three year old.
And for a fact Daniel wasn't very fond of the Harmony idea, he didn't even know where Harmony was! or how to spell it for that matter, but he knew he didn't want to be there.Okay, maybe his grand-mother would be there, she was alright...she always gave him the coolest toys and kissed and hugged him allot while saying he was the most handsome little boy she's ever met, not that he knew what 'handsome' ment, but his granny seemed to think he was.
"is there parks in Harmony?"he inquired, trying to think of the upside.
Charity smirked as she nodded"tons...and baseball."
Daniel hated his mother for knowing him so well, she knew very well how much he loved to play baseball...anywhere,anytime...even if it ment Harmony.
"so I guess Harmony isn't going to be that bad huh?"Charity smiled, knwoing she'd won him over.
"maybe."Daniel finished crisply, as they past the town's city limits.
She stopped the car, infront of the beautiful side street where her mother and cousin anxiously awaited them, waving like fools to Daniel who to them had grown so big.
"are you ready?"Charity questioned nervously to her son.
"I donno, are you?"Daniel shrugged.
"good answer."she sighed, as she slowly made her way out of the car."wait right here."she instructed.
Daniel's eyes followed his mother as she walked up to his grand-mother, and this other girl hadn't met.They stood in silence for a moment, as his mom spoke...then awkwardly enough his grand-mother and this other girl took her into a huge bear hug, the one his Granny was queen for.
"honey I'm so glad you're home!"Faith smiled.
"yeah, it's really good to see you again..."Jessica began not as estatic as her aunt, she knew why Charity was here and she too shared Charity's fears, she was the only one who knew about Jackson and his problems.She sat on the other end of the phone and listened to the nights he would come home, drunk...the night's he even dared to raise a hand to her cousin.
"now quick"Faith continued, breaking the stressful gaze between Jessica and Charity."bring my little boy out!" and so she did, Daniel insisted his mother carry him.He was still a man no doubt of that, but there was nothing wrong with a man being a little shy around people now was there.
"Danny this is your cousin Jessica."Charity started as Daniel timidly looked up at the dark haired woman.
"hey Danny."she smiled.
The little man's response was only burrying his head into his mothers shoulders."and this is---"Charity went on softly.
"I don't think we need an introduction isn't that right?"Faith roared,a she took the little boy in her arms and they play faught.
Charity's look seperated from her mother and son, as she re-fimiliarized her self with her home town.Everything the same, as the day she left it.It was still the picturesque little town, in the middle of Maine.
"why don't me and Jess take Daniel for some...ice cream."Faith began as she caught Charity's daze.
"well, can I Mommy?"
"sure, why not."she agreed, as Jessica and Daniel started towards the ice cream parlor.Faith stayed behind, giving her daughter one last look.
"I know you want to."she said, knowing her daughter would want to take a look around."don't worry Daniel will be fine with us."
Charity nodded queitly, as she took a small walk.In the far distance she could hear the loud bold noises of the carnival, and the laughs and screams from people attending it.Not too far away was the B&B and her aunts trinket shop.Her very few and far between memories of the place flouded back to her, as she continued to comming to one of the sidewalks.
Miguel was walking, looking towards the horizon as he admired the pinkish read settling itself down on the town.He looked towards the sidewalks, as someone caught his attention.it's not her. he told himself thinking his thoughts were true, until he got closer and the fair haired woman turned to him.
"Miguel."she spoke quietly.
"Charity, how have you been?"he asked, his eyes showing some concern.
"I've been better."Charity answered with a small touch of bitterness in her tone."so, how are things with you and Kay? the baby must be getting big."she shifted conversation.
Miguel remained still, as he looked Charity in the eye."Kay...she had a miscarrige."
"what?"Charity breathed quietly.
"she lost the baby, it was a little girl."Miguel stated with the same bitterness in his tone."and Kay, she left town the baby dying was too much for her to bear...things weren't really working between us after that."
"I'm sorry," Charity began breaking the silence between them.
"it's alright, it's no one's fault."
"how is Kay doing?"Charity asked, despite their differences and what had happened years ago, Kay was still her family and she still cared about her.
"she's had better days, but she's seems to be taking it one step at a time."
He still looked the same, although his eyes were darker and his deminor was more somber than the man she had once loved.
"so...you're married."Miguel started once more, hurt that she had actually moved on but then again apart of him knew she wouldn't spend her life longing for him.
"yes."she answer words falling bitter on her tounge, forgetting her ring was still on.
Suddenly Daniel's small voice could be heard, as he ran in the middle of the conversation."Mommy, I was looking everywhere for you."he breathed, as he slowly silenced glaring over at the dark haired man.He didn't know who he was, and personally he really didn't care what he did care about on the other hand was why he was talking to his mother! didn't he know she was married!?
"Miguel, this is my son...Daniel."Charity smiled tentively, as Daniel continued to glare.He didn't like him, he hated him...and he was sure assert him of that with his abrupt silence, and frown.No one was comming in between his family...not anyone,not him.
FoxayFan-girl, I have good and bad news for you.The good news is just like I've said before I'm thinking of possible stories for "Foxay" but while they might be mentioned in this story, they won't be in it.But take the satisfaction in knowing that they are together even though they aren't mentioned! latz.
She slept restlessly in the uncomfortable hotel bed images running, rampidlly through head as she tossed and turned.
Flashback
"I told you if you couldn't handel this problem of yours you couldn't live here!"Charity thundered as she followed him into the livingroom.
"I told you , I didn't have a God damn problem...now where's my son?" Jackson questioned as he seated himself, down on the couch.
Charity glared at him, as she stood."do you know what time it is? I'll tell you it's two o'clock in the mourning your son...is asleep in bed, where he needs to be."she took a deep breath as she foccused upon him, folding her arms."and I think you should leave."
"me?"he snickered loosely.
"yes you."Charity snapped, as Jackson's eyes met with hers he looked at her for a moment before standing slowly and walking to where she was.
"what's the matter Charity,"he smiled as he continue"we were so good together...remember?" he asked, while walking closer towards her.
Good together, that's what she thought they were...that's what she forced herself and everyone to believe but their was more to this than the picture perfect familly.
"good?"Charity repeated as she rose her voice."yeah, Jackson we were great together so great that you thought it was okay, to hit me."Charity turned to him more"remeber that!?"she yelled,"you threw me to the floor and started hitting me, I had to say all of these were accidents...just because you love me right?"she nodded, trying to keep calm so she wouldn't wake Daniel.
"I never did that to hurt you, we've talked about that...I just do it because I love you so much and I'm just scared to loose you."
She nodded quietly, as she backed away from him.
"you know I love you, Charity."he moved closer to her trying to get her into an embrace.
Charity moved away, as she slapped him across the face."don't you dare touch me again!"she felt her whole entire body shake with anger, as she hit him and watched Jackson rub his jaw.
His eyes began to fill with anger, as his hollow heavy footsteps made his way back to her.He was drunk again, she knew it, when was it when he wasn't.Before she knew it he grabbed her and began to jar her violently."who the hell do you think you are!?" he roared, as rose his hands to her.
//////////////////////////////
Charity rose abruply, in a cold sweat.Quickly she got up from her bed to check on Daniel, who was sleeping quietly jumping from left to right in his bed, roughling the sheets as he did such while closely making his way off the bed.
The sun graced this place lightly, as warm summer winds blew softly making the grass sway back and forth.He knelt down tracing the letters of her name, with his fingertips while placing daisies down onto the light green grass.He'd been here so many times before, just to see her and assure himself she was okay but he couldn't speak, he didn't know what to tell her.He never deserved her love, he knew that well now remembering all the times he'd done her wrong and all the times... her heart so innocent and forgiving would always let him back in but she was gone now, leaving Miguel's heart dark and bitter full of regret.
"I've done allot of things in my life that I'm not content with..."he began as he spoke softly, he looked onto the tombstone memories of when he burried her flashed through his head, how dark and alone he felt when she left him alone in this cruel world.How angry he was that someone could tear someone as young as her away from a world she would never get the chance to expirience, but as he recollected he didn't think she needed to expirience something so cruel and unforgiving.It was hard, but over the years it forced himself to be at peace with it.
" I hurt allot of people that I loved,"he began the words even know hard to release."but I just wanted you to know you were never what went wrong with my life, I know I must have made you feel that way, and I'm so sorry."his voice began to weaken, as his eyes began fill with tears of anger.He never dreamed this would be so hard, so difficult to say what he's really felt, what his heart so protectively held along the years"I loved you, so much...I had so many hopes for you;I knew you would've---made me so happy"he whispered, as he gathered his emotions.
"you've changed me, so much, in so many ways...and I'm going to try like hell to make you proud of me."he quickly silenced himslef, as he looked onto his daughter's grave one last time." I love you, Maria."he stood, finally bringing himself to walk away.
"I don't get it Mommy"Daniel pouted in his car seat."why did we have to be so far from Daddy anyways, why do we have to go to Harmony?"
Charity sighed deeply, as she kept her eyes on the road."well, for many reasons Danny..."she trailed"it's where Mommy grew up, it's where her Mommy is..."Charity trailed trying to make Harmony seem more appealing to her three year old.
And for a fact Daniel wasn't very fond of the Harmony idea, he didn't even know where Harmony was! or how to spell it for that matter, but he knew he didn't want to be there.Okay, maybe his grand-mother would be there, she was alright...she always gave him the coolest toys and kissed and hugged him allot while saying he was the most handsome little boy she's ever met, not that he knew what 'handsome' ment, but his granny seemed to think he was.
"is there parks in Harmony?"he inquired, trying to think of the upside.
Charity smirked as she nodded"tons...and baseball."
Daniel hated his mother for knowing him so well, she knew very well how much he loved to play baseball...anywhere,anytime...even if it ment Harmony.
"so I guess Harmony isn't going to be that bad huh?"Charity smiled, knwoing she'd won him over.
"maybe."Daniel finished crisply, as they past the town's city limits.
She stopped the car, infront of the beautiful side street where her mother and cousin anxiously awaited them, waving like fools to Daniel who to them had grown so big.
"are you ready?"Charity questioned nervously to her son.
"I donno, are you?"Daniel shrugged.
"good answer."she sighed, as she slowly made her way out of the car."wait right here."she instructed.
Daniel's eyes followed his mother as she walked up to his grand-mother, and this other girl hadn't met.They stood in silence for a moment, as his mom spoke...then awkwardly enough his grand-mother and this other girl took her into a huge bear hug, the one his Granny was queen for.
"honey I'm so glad you're home!"Faith smiled.
"yeah, it's really good to see you again..."Jessica began not as estatic as her aunt, she knew why Charity was here and she too shared Charity's fears, she was the only one who knew about Jackson and his problems.She sat on the other end of the phone and listened to the nights he would come home, drunk...the night's he even dared to raise a hand to her cousin.
"now quick"Faith continued, breaking the stressful gaze between Jessica and Charity."bring my little boy out!" and so she did, Daniel insisted his mother carry him.He was still a man no doubt of that, but there was nothing wrong with a man being a little shy around people now was there.
"Danny this is your cousin Jessica."Charity started as Daniel timidly looked up at the dark haired woman.
"hey Danny."she smiled.
The little man's response was only burrying his head into his mothers shoulders."and this is---"Charity went on softly.
"I don't think we need an introduction isn't that right?"Faith roared,a she took the little boy in her arms and they play faught.
Charity's look seperated from her mother and son, as she re-fimiliarized her self with her home town.Everything the same, as the day she left it.It was still the picturesque little town, in the middle of Maine.
"why don't me and Jess take Daniel for some...ice cream."Faith began as she caught Charity's daze.
"well, can I Mommy?"
"sure, why not."she agreed, as Jessica and Daniel started towards the ice cream parlor.Faith stayed behind, giving her daughter one last look.
"I know you want to."she said, knowing her daughter would want to take a look around."don't worry Daniel will be fine with us."
Charity nodded queitly, as she took a small walk.In the far distance she could hear the loud bold noises of the carnival, and the laughs and screams from people attending it.Not too far away was the B&B and her aunts trinket shop.Her very few and far between memories of the place flouded back to her, as she continued to comming to one of the sidewalks.
Miguel was walking, looking towards the horizon as he admired the pinkish read settling itself down on the town.He looked towards the sidewalks, as someone caught his attention.it's not her. he told himself thinking his thoughts were true, until he got closer and the fair haired woman turned to him.
"Miguel."she spoke quietly.
"Charity, how have you been?"he asked, his eyes showing some concern.
"I've been better."Charity answered with a small touch of bitterness in her tone."so, how are things with you and Kay? the baby must be getting big."she shifted conversation.
Miguel remained still, as he looked Charity in the eye."Kay...she had a miscarrige."
"what?"Charity breathed quietly.
"she lost the baby, it was a little girl."Miguel stated with the same bitterness in his tone."and Kay, she left town the baby dying was too much for her to bear...things weren't really working between us after that."
"I'm sorry," Charity began breaking the silence between them.
"it's alright, it's no one's fault."
"how is Kay doing?"Charity asked, despite their differences and what had happened years ago, Kay was still her family and she still cared about her.
"she's had better days, but she's seems to be taking it one step at a time."
He still looked the same, although his eyes were darker and his deminor was more somber than the man she had once loved.
"so...you're married."Miguel started once more, hurt that she had actually moved on but then again apart of him knew she wouldn't spend her life longing for him.
"yes."she answer words falling bitter on her tounge, forgetting her ring was still on.
Suddenly Daniel's small voice could be heard, as he ran in the middle of the conversation."Mommy, I was looking everywhere for you."he breathed, as he slowly silenced glaring over at the dark haired man.He didn't know who he was, and personally he really didn't care what he did care about on the other hand was why he was talking to his mother! didn't he know she was married!?
"Miguel, this is my son...Daniel."Charity smiled tentively, as Daniel continued to glare.He didn't like him, he hated him...and he was sure assert him of that with his abrupt silence, and frown.No one was comming in between his family...not anyone,not him.