Chapter 15 Mystery of Fate, Secret of Destiny
"Sakura, what...?" Tomoyo started to say but Sakura cut her off. "Shhh..." Sakura just said. She then closed her eyes and took a very deep breath. A big smile had spread on her face. Tomoyo was taken aback a little. Sakura knew this so she said, "Let's just be silent for awhile. It has been so chaotic lately and I sort of miss our silent moments." She then turned to her best friend and smiled. Tomoyo just smiled back. The two remained silent as they glanced at the sky above them.
For some reason, the two felt their surroundings were more exquisite at that very moment. It was a full moon that night. They were at the garden, enjoying each other's company like the way they used to. "I've missed this. Who would have thought things would turn out like this?" Tomoyo suddenly commented.
For the first time since all of the things started, Tomoyo felt at ease. The fear that she felt just hours ago was forgotten. Before she knew it, it had already dissipated into nothingness. "Yeah." Sakura replied and gave a short giggle. "It's really hard to believe, I know. Our lives before seem a life time away." She then added. "I know what you mean, Sakura." "Tomoyo..." "Yes?" "You do know it's going to be harder from now on, don't you?" Sakura said as she turned to face Tomoyo. Her face was full of concern, hope and despair.
Tomoyo couldn't answer for a moment. She looked at her best friend's deep jade eyes. Tomoyo couldn't bring herself to answer. She already knew the secret meaning of Sakura's question. Tomoyo was having a hard time holding back the tears. She knew she had to be strong for Sakura. "Tomoyo?" Sakura urged on. By then, Tomoyo wasn't able to hold back. Tears flooded her eyes. She embraced Sakura and poured all the emotions.
Sakura was taken aback. She knew this would eventually happen but still, she wasn't prepared for it. She just embraced Tomoyo back. She wanted to ease her best friend's heart. It was really hard to see Tomoyo like that. What made it worse for Sakura, she knew Tomoyo was suffering because of her. Sakura wanted to comfort her but she too was lost for words.
She didn't know what she could possibly say that would probably calm Tomoyo. Sakura just thought it was wise to stay silent. She reasoned that it was better for them both if they would just go with the flow. It was better to let everything out than keeping it all bottled up inside.
Sakura could then remember the times when she was in the same position as Tomoyo was at that moment. She could remember Shaoran's warm embrace and tender words. She could also remember his patience. She then wished that she too could say the right words for Tomoyo to understand.
Shaoran, coming back from the briefing with Yukito, was walking slowly, heading back to his room. As he neared the garden, he could start to feel Sakura's aura. He noted that her aura seemed troubled. He knew her well enough to know that if Sakura were troubled, it would affect her performance a bit. He knew that she could easily be driven by her emotions. He then decided to go and talk to her about it.
As Shaoran approached the garden, he felt Sakura's aura going faint. He knew that it was Sakura's way of hiding her emotions or something must be wrong. Fearing the worst, Shaoran hurried to the garden. But when he glimpsed and saw that it was nothing more than Sakura trying to comfort Tomoyo, he quickly stepped back into the darkeness before Sakura could see him.
For a moment there, Sakura thought she felt Shaoran nearby. She strained herself trying to see if Shaoran was there. Sakura gave up her search and turned back to Tomoyo.
Tomoyo then got a hold of herself and tried to calm down. Sakura just smiled at her. "Sorry, Sakura. I just..." Tomoyo started to say. Sakura just shook her head and continued to smile. "There's no need, Tomoyo. I understand how you feel and I'm really grateful." Sakura just closed her eyes and added, "It just pains me to see you suffer so much because of me." "Sakura..." "Tomoyo, please believe." "Sakura, I do believe. It's just-""No doubts, Tomoyo, no doubts...I really need you to believe without any doubts. You have to be strong for me. It's really hard for me to cope considering the price fate had already asked me to pay. This is all happening so fast and I don't know to what extent I could reach. That's why I need your confidence. Tomoyo, you're my best friend and you know me better than anyone else. You know I can't go on when I know what I'm leaving isn't finished. I'm not saying this is the end but it would greatly help if I know you're all right no matter what happened."
"You have my word, Sakura, you have my confidence. You've grown a lot, best friend. You would have never admitted something like this to me. Just remember, I'm always here for you as you are for me." Tomoyo replied as she wiped the last of her tears away. She then smiled back at Sakura.
"You don't know how much it means to me, Tomoyo." Sakura answered with great relief. "I think I do." Tomoyo replied as she gave a short giggle. Sakura couldn't help but smile. "Yeah well...I guess you do but you know..." Sakura's smiled then faded. "Ever since the incident back home, I felt everything died with them, me in particular. You're my best friend so you're the only person who knows the real me. I lost that so it's essential that I have your confidence because in that way, I may find myself again. I may be me again."
Tomoyo then understood the deeper meaning of everything. She then knew what she must do. "Yukito may know me for a long time but still, he doesn't really know who I am. I better put myself back together again not just for my sake but for everybody else's as well. To tell you frankly, I'm kind of embarrassed towards Rei-san, Eriol-san and especially Shaoran. I feel their confidence in me yet I'm still having a hard time believing in myself. I don't want to disappoint them, everybody...especially myself." Sakura said.
It was the first time she was really honest like that. "Sakura, you won't disappoint anybody and I can assure you with that. You just don't realize it right now but they can see your best. I think that is what matters the most. All you need to do now is find the courage inside yourself to admit that you are indeed doing your best." Tomoyo replied.
"Tell me, Tomoyo...am I being selfish?" Sakura suddenly asked. "No. Why do you say that?" "Because ever since this started, I haven't thought of anybody else much." "Sakura, humility is not looking down on yourself but thinking less of yourself. There's a thin line between selfishness and self- awareness. You're more on self-awareness. To tell you the truth, Sakura, considering everything you've been through...you're selfless. Besides, I think you better pull yourself together first before you help others. I mean, how could you help others to the fullest if you yourself are at the brink of destruction?" Tomoyo reassure her.
Sakura just smiled. Both of them just stayed silent for a while. Tomoyo then started to reminisce about the past and all the fun they used to have. Tomoyo couldn't help but giggle. "What?" Sakura said, quite confused. Tomoyo continued to giggle as she replied, "I remember back then on a night like this...I remember Touya-san was telling all the ghost stories that he knew just to freak you out and dared you to come with them to explore the caves by the shore."
Sakura started to giggle too. She knew the memory Tomoyo was talking about. "Yeah I know that. If I remember correctly, Rika, Naoko and Chiharu arrived and got all interested so all of you came along with us. All of us went but got separated. You guys were the lucky ones to haven't got even a single drop of water upon yourselves while we ended up the complete opposite."
Tomoyo couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah. You were unfortunate enough to get stuck with Touya-san and Yukito-san. Well, at least Yukito-san was there. God, were you all so soaked when you guys came back." "Tell me about it. I was really scared out of my mind because Onii-chan kept saying that there was a ghost or something supernatural nearby...then...then...the tide came in soaking the three of us." Tomoyo laughed harder.
"Hey that wasn't funny!" "Yes it is. You guys were so drenched that your mother gave you guys that look." Tomoyo said. She then demonstrated the look. Sakura couldn't help herself but laugh. "Touya got in so much trouble. He was grounded for about a month." Sakura said. "And you got a terrible cold." Tomoyo added. "Don't remind me. I was so sick that I couldn't get out of bed. I never felt so sick in my entire life. If it weren't so cold that night maybe I wouldn't have gotten so sick." "Yeah. The cold did you in. But you should have seen Touya-san's face when he found out how sick you were. He didn't need to admit it but it was written all over his face. He would have wished to trade places with you." Tomoyo replied. Sakura just nodded.
"I know. It's still hard to believe that Onii-chan's like that. That's one of the things that makes me miss him so much." Sakura commented. Tomoyo just nodded. "He loved you so much, Sakura. He just didn't want to show it openly but he really cared for you." She then said. Sakura then started to giggle. "What?" Tomoyo then asked.
Sakura shook her head. "Do you remember the time when we were told that we are cousins? It was really shocking, wasn't it? I can't forget Onii- chan's face." Sakura laughed a little harder. She could picture Touya's face at that moment. It was something priceless.
Tomoyo smiled. "Yeah. I remember. I remember it clearly. It was like saying, 'Oh no! It's the end of the world! With this two in the family, who knows what will happen?'" The two started to laugh hard. "Yeah. I got the same impression. But we couldn't start laughing there. They might say that we've lost it or something." Sakura commented.
"People still find it hard to believe though. They couldn't imagine that we're cousins and you and Yukito-san are not even related." Tomoyo just nodded. "But you know I like it that way. I mean, where in the world would you find two people brought up as two different people, not knowing each other much, becoming best friends who wished that they were related by blood and later finding out that they were really cousins?" Sakura exclaimed. "Hey your right! We're one in a million, Sakura. It makes everything extra special." Tomoyo commented. Sakura smiled and nodded.
"Sakura, can I ask you something?" "Sure. As long as I can answer it though?" Sakura said, smiling. "Oh I'm sure you can answer it." Tomoyo said, grinning a little. "Do you promise to answer truthfully?" Tomoyo added. Sakura just gave a nod.
"Well, then...how deep is your relationship with Li Shaoran?" Tomoyo said. Sakura was shocked. She turned and faced Tomoyo. She looked at her quite suspiciously. At first she didn't want to answer. Shaoran in the shadows of the garden was also taken aback. He didn't know whether he should be there, listening to them. But then if he moved, he might give away the fact that he was there. He didn't know what to do.
"What do you mean, Tomoyo?" Sakura asked. She was still having a hard time processing the question. She still didn't know if she heard right. "Well, you two seem very close. I'm your best friend, Sakura and you also said that I know you more than anyone else. I know that you're quite different. It may be related to what had happened to you but did something happen on your way here, with Li? I mean, even he seems to be a lot different from whom he was before." Tomoyo exclaimed. "Different? You know very well, Tomoyo, that everybody changes. What's so suspicious about that?"
"Yeah everybody changes but why the sudden change in the both of you? Come on Sakura. I won't tell anybody." Tomoyo pleaded. Sakura then answered back, "What is there to tell? He's my friend. Not as close as you and Yukito-san but a friend none the less." Tomoyo eyed Sakura suspiciously. "What? I'm telling you the truth and still you won't believe me?" "There seems to be more than what you're leading on, Sakura." "Like what?" "I don't know. Come on, please...I won't tell anyone I swear." "There's nothing more to tell at the moment. If there was, I promise you that you'll be the first one to know. Tomoyo seemed a little disappointed. Sakura could sense this so she said, "Tomoyo, how could I tell you something I don't even know? I promise you, if anything happens to me...you'll be the first to know." Tomoyo then gave up. She knew that once Sakura spoke like that, she wouldn't be able to make her talk anymore.
Silence fell on both of them again. After a few minutes, Tomoyo finally said, "We better be heading for bed, especially you. It's already late and I believe another hard day of training is waiting for you." Sakura just smiled. "You go ahead, Tomoyo. I think I want to stay out here for a little longer." She replied.
Tomoyo was a little reluctant in leaving her. Sakura could feel Tomoyo's agitation. So she just smiled and said, "Don't worry too much, Tomoyo. You'll grow old easily." Tomoyo just smiled and gave Sakura a nod. They said their goodnights and Tomoyo headed to her room.
Sakura just kept her smile and looked at the stars above. "Still can't sleep?" Someone said. Sakura quickly stood and turned around. She saw Shaoran standing there in front of her. His calm face soothed her. "Shaoran...you scared me." Sakura said. Shaoran grinned. "I didn't feel you coming. Well maybe a little awhile back." She said.
Shaoran walked towards her. "I hid it just the way you did awhile ago." He replied. Sakura just smiled as they stared at each other for a moment. "So...how long were you standing there?" Sakura asked. "Awhile now. When I felt you troubled and it was slowly fading, I feared you were in danger so I came. But since I was wrong, I decided to just stay back." Shaoran replied. Sakura gave a nod.
"I'm sorry." Shaoran then said. Sakura became confused with his sudden statement. "I had intruded on your privacy and it is only right that I seek forgiveness." He then bowed his head. Sakura gently lifted his head with her hand. When their eyes met, she smiled at him. "I won't forgive you because there's nothing to forgive. You did not intrude on my privacy. To tell you frankly, I'm touched. When you thought I was in danger you came. I think it's very sweet of you. Besides, I think it was better for you to hear whatever you did." Sakura then said.
Shaoran could feel his heart beat faster. He was thankful it was already dark because for sure, Sakura could have seen his face go red. "Thank you, Sakura." Sakura just smiled in return. "What do you mean it was better for me to have heard whatever you two were talking about?" He then asked. Sakura smiled again and replied, "Because I don't have to repeat it again. And for you to understand a little why I'm like this." Shaoran didn't say anything.
"Shaoran, do you mind coming with me for a walk? I mean, if that's alright with you...if you're not tired or anything, that is." Shaoran smiled back. He then replied, "Of course, Sakura." Sakura smiled again. "...anything for you..." Shaoran whispered to himself. "I'm sorry...did you say something?" Sakura said. Shaoran could feel his face grow warm. "No...no...I didn't say anything..." They then started to walk around.
"So, how much did you hear?" Sakura asked. "Well...I'm not sure either...almost all of it I guess..." Shaoran answered. Sakura smiled. "Can I ask you something?" Sakura nodded. "Kinomoto really got himself grounded, right?" Shaoran said. Sakura couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah. He did. It's hard to picture, huh?" Shaoran grinned. "You have no idea. How about you? Have you ever been grounded?" He then asked. "Yeah. I have my share."
"You don't seem surprised." She added. "How could I be?" He replied. "Fine. Don't tell me you never had your share?" "Oh I'm not like you. I was never grounded." "Yeah right." "Hard to believe?" "Isn't that obvious?" "I'm serious. I was never grounded. Maybe punished but never the grounding type." "Isn't grounding a sort of punishment?" "Yeah but-""But you just don't like to admit it." "No it was something worse." "Like what? Standing on a poll single legged for a couple of hours holding a bowl with water on either hand and another one on your head? That sort of thing?" "Exactly. Don't tell me you went through the same thing?" "Me? You've got to be serious? 'I'm not like you.'" Shaoran grinned.
"You're impossible, you know that?" Shaoran commented. "Impossible? I could have told you that. It's a wonder what took you so long to figure that one out." Sakura replied. Shaoran simply shook his head in disbelief. He couldn't help but smile a little. "Are you always like this?" He couldn't help but ask. "Oh you have no idea." Sakura replied. Shaoran just smiled at her. "I don't know how in the world Kinomoto could have a sister like you. Your personalities are complete opposites." He commented. "You've got that wrong, Shaoran. We're pretty much alike. Nobody but us sees that." She replied.
"You're really close to him, don't you?" "Yeah. I look up to him more than he'll ever know. I admit...he could really be a pain especially when he feels like it. But I think that comes with the job label. He's my brother and he's suppose to be like that I guess." "I'm sure he was still able to show you how much he cared for you." "You are so right, Shaoran. Onii-chan never liked to show it openly but I'm really grateful he's my brother for a lot of things. For one, I owe him a lot. If it weren't for him, my life would have been very different now. I would have been so miserable. And two, he taught me a lot of things that would be really helpful in my life. Lastly, even if he doesn't look it, he's very approachable. He always listened to me and guided me as a big brother would." Sakura explained.
"You are aware that he knew things no one else did. He used that a couple of times to save me." Sakura then added. "Like what, Sakura?" Sakura then smiled and asked, "Shaoran, have you ever wondered why my family trained me both in martial arts and in magic?" "Maybe at one time I did but since my family also did the same and since Hiiragizawa explained it, I never really thought about it. Why?" "Because it all boils down to that. Aside from my family, Tomoyo and Yukito-san are the only persons who know about it. Please promise me that you'll never tell another soul? Not yet maybe...not until the time is right..." "I promise."
"When I was about two years old, my father's best friend saw me and pressured my parents to betroth me to his son. After some more pressuring and thinking on my parents' part, they finally agreed. And so everything was arranged. I was still so young then. I didn't understand that sort of thing yet. I mean, why would I right? Anyway, even at that young age, I knew that something was wrong and would often ask my parents why. They just told me that it was for the best and that at least when the time comes, I would be safe with him. But that uncertainty never did disappear. It was always there and actually grew as time passed. I never wanted to be with him really, especially when they came to visit. Every time, I would wish that Tomoyo was there so that I'd have some excuse not to be alone with him or basically not be with him at all. I eventually told Tomoyo and Yukito- san about it. They were sympathetic about it because my feeling was not enough to get me out of the engagement. His father would not allow it. As it grew worse, Yukito-san advised me to tell Onii-chan about it, which I eventually did."
"When I reached the age of fifteen and he was already eighteen, they came for a visit. Tomoyo was away so I had no choice but to go with him. The uncertainty that I had been feeling was at its worst. I would have said that I was sick but then again, I thought that it was better to go with him for a walk than be alone in my room, while he was watching me. So I went along with him. He then started talking about the wedding and how it was growing near. He kept saying that it would be a matter of time before he takes me in as his wife and that I'd be all his. Just thinking about the memory makes me shiver." Sakura said. Shaoran didn't exactly know what to say. He himself was feeling strong emotions at what Sakura was relating. But he could sense all of Sakura's anxieties and fears. He decided to say, "We don't have to talk about this if you don't want to. I mean, it's no use forcing yourself because I can see that it pains you. There will be other times." "No. This is something that I need to get out of my chest. Besides, it's better that it's out on the open than keeping it, letting it haunt me for the rest of my life."
"Anyway, I got so full of him that I just told him to be silent. I poured all my anger towards it. I told him that I didn't want to marry him and that I was calling it all off at that very moment. That was when I saw how possessive he really was. He roughly grabbed my arm and said how dare I talk to him like that. He said that I can't change that. I was his and that was that. I fought him by saying he had no right to tell me that and that he didn't and will never own me. His aggressiveness then kicked in. He pushed me to a tree and said that if he can't have me then no one will." Sakura was starting to shake a little with that. Shaoran noticed it but before he could say anything else, Sakura continued her tale.
"He...he...tried to...um...take my dignity away. I couldn't fight because he overpowered me greatly. I felt my world crashing down and that was the end. But just like heaven sent, my brother came and beat him up. He then carried me and took me away from there. I was still shaken up that I couldn't run. He had to carry me. When we were at a safe distance, he put me down on a rock, took off his coat and laid it over my shoulder. I couldn't look at him straight in the eye. I was so ashamed, hurt, afraid and angry all the same time. He then knelt in front of me and asked if I was all right. I finally brought myself to look at him. That was when I lost it. Tears started to fall down my eyes and I couldn't stop shaking. Onii-chan embraced me and said nothing. He just knelt there the entire time not saying anything, just comforting me. When I calmed down a bit, I broke from him and he said that I didn't have to worry anymore. I was free and that he'll never hurt me again and he was going to make sure of that. He then told me that he was going to teach me things that would help me protect myself. But then we would have to have father's permission and that meant telling them what had happened to get it and to formally break off the engagement."
"I pleaded with him not to tell anyone especially our parents because I feared what was to happen. But it was the first time I saw Touya smile at me. He told me that everything was going to be alright and that I just have to believe in him. He would help make things better. I believed him. So I pleaded my parents to break off the engagement and he pleaded to allow him to teach me how to defend myself. But as we thought, our parents needed a reason. I looked at him and he knew that I couldn't do it so he was the one who related everything to them. Before we knew it, the engagement was off. We then found out that he was no father's best friend. He had long since died. An imposter and his son were just using his name. But anyway, we moved to our ancestral house...our grandparents' house...and there I started my training."
"What did Tomoyo and Yukito say? I mean, you had to tell them right?" Shaoran asked. "I didn't. My brother did. He told them when they got curious because I wouldn't speak of it. Only now so I don't know what their initial reactions were." Sakura replied.
"Wow...who would have thought that a lot of things have already happened in your life? No one would have guessed just by looking at you. So what did the people say when they found out that you broke the engagement?" "I don't know and I didn't care. All that matter to me is that I've got my freedom back. They can talk all they want but the truth remains. Nobody could ever twist that. Even if they try, no one will get hurt aside from them because they're the ones making stories." Sakura answered.
"You're amazing, you know that?" Shaoran couldn't help but say. "Why do you say that?" "Because after all the things that have happened to you, you still retain that innocence and joy. If it were other people in your shoes, they would be out of their minds by now." Sakura just smiled.
"But you never heard from that guy again or that imposter?" Shaoran said. Sakura shook her head. "Forgive me for saying, I wouldn't care less." She said. "Your feelings are understandable." Shaoran reassured her.
Soon, they've reached the palace bounds. "Shaoran, what's beyond these parts?" "Would you like to see? There's a gate over there, which no one really knows about. I could show you, if you like..." Sakura obliged.
"How did you get to know this?" "Your brother showed me once." Sakura stopped in shock. "Touya? That doesn't sound like him. He wouldn't really do something like this." "I know. I was surprised myself. But before he last left here, he asked me to come with him. He showed me this path." Shaoran replied.
He then opened the secret gateway. He then made way for Sakura. She was a little hesitant. He reassured her so she went through the bushes and trees. He followed her. Once they were at the other side, Sakura stopped and was amazed with what she saw.
It was a spectacle of mere beauty. It was like a virgin pasture. It displayed the glamour nature stood for. The moonlight gave the impression that it was something out of an oil painting.
"Touya also said that you would love to see it." Shaoran then said. Sakura turned to him. He smiled and added, "He knew what was to happen especially to you. He knew how things will turn out so he made sure he left something that would help clear your mind." Sakura smiled back. She still couldn't believe to what extent her brother had reached just for her.
"Are you sure it's alright to go forth from here?" She then asked. "I wouldn't have brought you here if it wasn't." Shaoran said. He then smiled at her, offering his hand. Sakura took it. "Careful. We're about to descend a slope. Watch your step. And don't worry...I won't let you fall." "I know. You never did." Sakura replied.
Slowly, they descended the slightly steep slope. But as they made their way, there was a mild earthquake. Sakura lost her footing and slipped. But there came Shaoran's strong arm. As she was about to fall, Shaoran had put his arm around Sakura's waist to give her support and to prevent her from falling.
Sakura found herself in Shaoran's arms. They waited the earthquake out. Sakura, still in Shaoran's strong, gentle arms, never felt safer. The warmth of his embrace confirmed her real feelings for him. But deep in her heart she knew it could never happen. He was already engaged to be married and Sakura didn't want to go in between that.
The few seconds of the earthquake both felt too short and an eternity of bliss. They didn't know that the both of them wished that the moment would never end. When the earth was still once more, it took them another moment for them to slowly break away from each other. They looked at each other. Both didn't utter a word. They just looked at each other's eyes. Their faces were never as close as they were at that moment.
As they were under a spell called love, they closed their eyes and closed the gap between their lips, sharing their first sweet, tender kiss. They both felt right about it. But then Sakura felt a surge of pain coming from her heart. She couldn't let it go any further in fear of hurting him. She didn't want him to lose an engagement because of her.
As their lips parted and they looked at each other's eyes, at first neither one knew what to say. Sakura then said, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." She then stepped back away from him, away from his arms. Before Shaoran could say anything, Sakura added, "This is not right. I'm really sorry." "Why, Sakura?" "Because you're engaged and –"
When Shaoran understood, he silenced her with another kiss. "Now tell me, if there wasn't an engagement, would you still say it's wrong?" Shaoran asked. Sakura couldn't answer. She wasn't sure of what to say. Shaoran then took Sakura's hand and placed it to his heart. He then looked at her, "We've known each other for more than a year now. During that time...you've grown close to me...there were also a lot of times when I thought that I have lost you...I've learned how to love you...but I won't force you to love me back...just tell me you don't love me and I'll never bother you with it ever again. But I'll always be here for you no matter what happens. The engagement is nothing. It does not exist. It's just a childhood thing that doesn't really mean anything. Just tell me, Sakura, please." He said.
Sakura just wrapped her arms around Shaoran's neck and rested her head on his chest, which had provided her comfort and love countless times. She then said, "I can't...I can't say that..." She then looked at him straight in the eyes. "It's very tempting to say 'What took you so long?' but..." Sakura added and smiled.
Shaoran couldn't help but smile too. "But?" He said. "But I know how it is. It took me awhile too to sort my feelings for you." "Does that mean what I think it means?" Sakura giggled and nodded. "I love you too, Shaoran." They just smiled at each other for a moment before sharing another kiss. This time, their kiss was much more stronger.
But suddenly, a sudden surge of unknown energy came over Sakura. She broke from the kiss and staggered back a little. She almost lost her balance. Shaoran took a hold on her arm preventing her from falling. "What's wrong Sakura? Are you alright?" Shaoran said with great concern.
Sakura was still shaken a little so she was not able to respond. Shaoran looked at her with great concern. "What happened, Sakura? Are you alright?" "I...don't know, Shaoran. There was this sudden surge of...I don't even know what...but I'm alright. I was just taken aback a little." Sakura replied, not sure if she could believe that too. "I think we should be heading back." Shaoran suggested. "Yeah. I guess you're right. There's still so much to do tomorrow. We better get some rest." Sakura said.
The next day...
Sakura woke up before the sun began to rise. She had had a dream, which she couldn't understand. She then found herself unable to fall back to sleep. She glanced and saw Kero sleeping peacefully nearby. She couldn't help but smile. She then decided to just wait in the garden for the others. So she quickly freshened up and headed outside.
Sakura warmed up a bit and before she knew it, the sun had already risen. "You're up early." Someone suddenly said. She quickly stood and turned. She saw Rei walking towards her. Sakura smiled and greeted him. He greeted her too. "So, having a hard time sleeping?" Rei said as they sat back down on the grass. "No, not really. How about you? You're up early too." "Ah...I couldn't sleep. Been thinking about a lot of things lately." "I share your trouble. Has there been any development in the war against the Mulian army?" "No, not yet. No new information had been gathered yet...no informant had arrived." "Oh. Well...we can't do anything about it. I just hope they're not up to their old tricks."
After being silent for a while, Rei spoke, "Sakura, can I ask you something?" "Sure." "Sakura, where do you get your strength? I mean, you've gone through a lot of things in your life and well...I was just wondering how you can still...you know, be joyful and all that." Sakura smiled.
She then replied, "I find it surprising sometimes too. I don't know actually but...to tell you the truth...I get my strength from all of you. I can't just give up because there is more at stake here. But...I remember being told that strength isn't determined about how big your muscles are or how rich you are...it is determined how you face your problems in spite of what all the consequences are. I remember being taught never to run away because when you run away, your past will just keep coming up to you and nothing is solved. But if you face it head on, the bitterness of the past will just become an old memory and that's all. I'm afraid just like you but my father once told me that courage is not how many medals you get or having no fear at all but it is fear put into actions."
Rei smiled. "No wonder you could face anything. You have been brought up around great wisdom. I wish I could be like that." He said. Sakura couldn't help but smiled. "You know what, Rei-san?" Rei looked at her and she said, "I don't know if this will help but what makes me smile when things go wrong is that...as long as the moon is up there in the sky and the sun still rises every morning, there's nothing to worry about. It simply means that everything has an end. People sometimes take it for granted but it is enough to make anyone smile."
"Never look down. Keep moving forward." Rei said. He then looked at Sakura and smiled before continuing, "That was what my Father used to tell me when he was still alive. I never really thought about it or really understood its meaning. Now I know. My Father would have been proud of me if I had understood sooner." "Your Father is very proud of you not for anything else but because you are his son and you have grown to be the man that he had dreamed you to turn out. I'm sure he's watching you right now." Sakura commented.
Rei just smiled. "You know, my father and your father had been very close. I remember as a child, your father was always here, ready to give a hand and would always stand up for what he believed in. He was very quiet but was an exceptional knight. Your brother was the same. As you know we trained together and I've seen how hard he strived and exerted all his effort to uphold your father's legacy." Sakura couldn't help but giggle. "Onii-chan's very serious, especially when it comes to his duties. People might think he's all mature and stuff but underneath that all, he's just like everybody else, annoying but very kind." "Of course you would say that. You're his sister. Naturally he would annoy you." "Yeah I know. But unlike anybody else aside from Yukito, I've seen Onii-chan even under his armor. I've seen his transformation from a mere child to an apprentice in training to a squire and finally a knight." Sakura replied.
"I miss him a lot, you know but if he was still alive and you tell him that, I'll just deny it." Sakura then added. Rei couldn't help but laugh. Sakura just smiled. "That's reasonable. After praising him and speaking highly of him, you still remain your stance of annoyance to him." He commented. Sakura giggled. "I wouldn't call that praising and you said so yourself, he is my brother and you know how it's like." She replied.
"You never did like show how much you look up to Touya. But, I know I never told you this but...it's so obvious and you two are a little too stubborn to see it." Yukito suddenly commented. Sakura looked up and saw Yukito standing there. "Good morning, Your Highness, Sakura." He added before sitting down himself. "Sakura, you do know how much Touya cared for you, don't you?" Yukito then said. Sakura just nodded.
"I've known it ever since especially since...you know what happened." Sakura replied. Yukito just nodded. "What happened?" Chiharu said as she and Naoko came to join them accompanied by Eriol. Rei wanted to ask that too but Chiharu beat him to it. They said good morning to one another before settling down. "So what happened?" Chiharu asked again. Sakura hesitated. She dared to give a quick glance over at Yukito.
Yukito knew why she was really hesitant. "It's just something that happened between them a long time ago." He said. "Yeah! That's right. Let's just say that it's something that brought us together. You know how much he scared me before and let's just say that it's something that finally convinced him to change...a little..." Sakura then said. To her relief they didn't ask for anything more.
After a while, when Rika finally came, Naoko said, "Well, we have to get going. Grandmother needs help and so we would be going to help her. We wish you all the best of luck." Sakura then stood and gave them each a big hug. "Take care, you guys." She said and smiled. "You take care too Sakura, especially when you're with these guys." Naoko commented. "Hey what does that suppose to mean?" Yamazaki said as he came forward with Shaoran. They just giggled. "Nothing...nothing..." They just answered. "Well, if you are through, everything is all set." Yamazaki then said. "Then I guess you should get a move on if you want to arrive at Grandmother's house before dark." Rei said as they all bid fare well.
Kero then came and joined them. "I guess everybody is here now, we should get started." Eriol said once they were all settled down. "Tomoyo isn't coming?" Rei said. Sakura smiled and replied, "No. I talked to her before I headed out. She said she wants to stay back a little. She's with Seiki now." Rei just nodded. Eriol then took out the Dragon and the Serpent gems from his coat. He then handed it over to Sakura. At first Sakura was a little hesitant in accepting them. She looked at Eriol. He just smiled to assure her that it was all right. Reluctantly, she took them into her hands.
As she got them, she could feel the surge of power from it. She couldn't help but gasp. "How come it feels a little different? Now I'm really having a bad feeling about this." Sakura couldn't help but say. The only two Clow cards left, the light and the dark cards, which were the only two left unchanged, that were on her pocket started to react with the power of the gems. At that moment, Sakura was then really worried. It had never happened before. "Eriol-san, is this suppose to happen?" Sakura then said.
Yukito and Kero then were engulfed by the same light from before and transformed into their true forms. When it all seemed calm again, Eriol whispered, "It begins..." It seemed that Shaoran was the only one to hear what he had said. But before he could do anything, he and Rei were forced to step back as they felt they couldn't breathe. Soon after, Rei had lost consciousness while Shaoran was still fighting it.
Sakura quickly knelt beside them and fearfully asked what was happening. She quickly turned to Eriol. He seemed indifferent. Sakura didn't know what to say. Eriol then said, "Their lives are now in your hands, Sakura. You must now change the remaining two cards in order to save them. If you fail, you know what will happen." Sakura didn't know what to say or react. But she was wasting time and she knew it.
Without another word, she quickly took out the two cards and tried to change them. But she was having trouble doing just so. She found it very difficult and fell to her knees. Kero and Yue then knelt by her side and said, "We will be with you always. We will lend you our powers so that it may help you with your ordeal." Sakura then tried to protest, "If I fail, you won't be able to come back. I can't let you two take that chance. You are important to me and I'm not just going to let you do something like that just because of my weakness." "We know Sakura. We trust you that's why we are doing this. Instead of being your servants, you treated is as friends." Yue said. Before Sakura could protest any more, Kero and Yue just gave her a nod. Sakura then smiled and agreed.
Soon, Sakura could see the improvement with both Kero and Yue's help. But it still wasn't enough. Shaoran then whispered, "Sakura, you could do this. I know you can. I believe you can." But as he said that, he finally lost consciousness. Sakura quickly looked at him. She wanted to quit to see it they still had a pulse but she knew that she couldn't do just that. She just closed her eyes and thought about everything that had happened and was happening in her life.
"I can't let them down...I just can't...they've sacrificed a lot for me and I'm not about to let all those hard work be wasted away into nothing." Sakura told herself. "I can't let them down...I can't!" Sakura shouted with the emotions she had in her heart. She finally did it. She was able to change them.
Sakura couldn't believe everything that had just happened. She couldn't help but fall to her knees. Before long, Kero and Yue materialized in front of her and Shaoran and Rei came to. As they congratulated her, she still seemed to be lost in it. "Eriol, who are you?" She finally said. Everyone took a step back, quite confused. Eriol just smiled. "I know how it sounds but back there...that wasn't you...I felt...different...you're aura was different...please...let us know who you really are..." She finally said.
"I am Eriol and nothing more." He answered and smiled. But with the look he saw in Sakura's eyes, he knew that she wasn't buying it. He then whispered to her, "You already know who I really am. It's just a matter of time before they will find out too." "I know, Clow Reed, I know." Sakura whispered back. Eriol just took a step back and smiled. "You're mission to transform the cards are now complete. But I'm afraid that this is only the beginning of everything else." Eriol then said.
"What shall we do now, Eriol-san?" Rei asked. "Now, we have to find all the other gems before they do. You all know what will happen if they beat us to it. Sakura, you are the one with the Eye of the Serpent so it will be extra hard for you. You will be the most vulnerable that was why you needed to be trained both in magic and in physical combat." He answered. Sakura just nodded.
"The final battle has begun." Shaoran commented. "Indeed it has, Li. I suggest that we all get some rest now because we only have a little time left before we start the journey." Eriol said. Everyone agreed and went their ways. "Sakura, can I talk to you?" Eriol said as the others went their ways. Sakura just nodded and stayed with him.
When everyone was gone and they were all alone, Eriol finally said, "How did you know who I am?" Sakura just smiled and replied, "From the beginning, you told me that I know you and that you will always be there to help me through it. I may haven't realized this sooner but I know this is for the best." "You are clever, Sakura. That's why you were chosen to be the next Master of the Cards. From now on, you write your own destiny. There is nothing more I can teach you." Eriol then said. "I know, Eriol- san. This is you now and well...I have to find the real me in the process. It is only I who could do this." Sakura replied.
"Now Sakura, that's what I want to talk about with you. Why do you keep on persisting that you don't know the real you?" Sakura couldn't answer. "Is it because of what happened back at your own village a year ago? Because if it is then-""Eriol-san, I say this things because this is what the truth is for me. Maybe because of what had happened, you're right but...it doesn't really boil down to just that...there are other things that have made me feel this way." "Sakura, you know yourself already. You just have to accept that instead of running away from it. I know this for a fact because I've watched you get challenged and face each challenge. In every situation, I've seen that you know what you are doing and you have faith in it. A person lost from himself cannot do that. You could. That is your last challenge, Sakura...to bring that person out." Eriol said.
"My last challenge..." Sakura repeated to herself. "Eriol-san, can I ask you something?" Eriol just nodded. "It's quite personal so you can opt not to answer...why did you choose to come back? I mean, you were able to prepare everything before you left this earth and yet you chose to come back...why? You already fulfilled a vast number of things but still...you're here in another persona." Eriol just smiled and said, "I guess this is the one that has been bothering you, am I right? Whether you made the right decision of coming back or not?" "How did you- no wait! I don't think I'd want to know how you know that." Sakura replied.
Eriol just giggled as Sakura smiled. "I came back because of you. I may have been able to fulfill my duty and didn't really have unfinished business but I chose to come back because of you. I wanted to see that when you finally take on the role as the next Master of the cards you would also be ready for your real duty. I'd wanted to prepare you for that and well, to see it through too. I'm not Clow Reed anymore but Eriol. I only retained half of my past life because the other half made sure that you came to this world." "What do you mean?" "Why do you think you were chosen? Why do you think that from all the possible people in your family you were chosen? It has been foretold, not by me but by your ancestor, that a child who had gone through great sufferings and still remained innocence would finally free the world from the bond of darkness. I don't need to be an intellect to determine whether or not you have gone through great sufferings."
"But Shaoran told me of another prophecy...one where two people would be the one to save this world." Sakura said. "It's a popular belief but I'm afraid that the only reason it was been circulated is to make sure that the chosen one would be protected by one who would gladly lay down his life for the future of mankind just like the chosen one." Eriol explained. Sakura didn't know what to say at that point.
"Sakura, just remember that things aren't what they seem but what they are. You have something in you that the darkness doesn't. It is something no one can ever take away." Eriol then added. "No one can take away? What is that?" "I can't answer that for you. You have to answer that for yourself. I'll give you a hint: as long as it is visible, it doesn't matter. Those things one cannot see are the real treasures." He answered.
"It's seems still a little bit confusing but I think that's a good thing for now." Sakura replied. Eriol just smiled. "You'll get it. Just think of it as a giant puzzle and only you have the pieces." He said. "Gee that sounds really...interesting...now I know I really confused." Sakura replied sarcastically. Eriol couldn't help but laugh. "I wish you could just tell me. That way we could get a move on." She commented. "Ah but patience is a virtue." "I know, Eriol-san. I'm just a little nervous that's all." "Isn't that obvious?"
"Why don't we head back so that you can think about it when you're not thinking about it." Eriol suggested. "You know, Eriol-san, it's strange...I understood that." "At least we're making progress, aren't we?" Sakura couldn't help but laugh.
The next day...
"I guess we're all set." Yukito announced. All throughout the night, preparations were made for the long journey Sakura and the others were going to take. The horses were ready and they were all ready to saddle up.
Sakura stood by Tomoyo and hugged her. "You take care of yourself." She whispered. "I should be the one telling you that, Sakura." Tomoyo replied, trying hard to suppress the tears. Sakura just smiled. "We'll be the one to take of the things here. Good luck on your search." Tomoyo then added. "Thank you, Tomoyo." Sakura replied.
"Your Highness, the knights are ready anytime the enemy attacks. We will find the stones as fast as we could and get back here immediately." Yukito said. Rei just nodded. "Good luck on your search. We wish you the best." Rei then said. Both Yukito and Shaoran nodded.
Just as Sakura was about to head towards her horse, she stopped in front of Eriol and said, "I still don't get what you told me yesterday but don't worry when we get back I promise I'll have my answer ready. Thank you so much, Eriol-san." Eriol smiled and replied, "You know I'll always be watching over you so you don't have to worry." Sakura just smiled.
Shaoran then helped her saddle up before getting on his horse too. "Be careful all of you. We will hold of the enemy from here while you find the gems." Rei said. "Don't fret. We will be back soon. I have a feeling the Eye of the Serpent is in the talking mood." Sakura replied and smiled. They then galloped off.
"There they go." Rei commented. "Just like what Sakura said, don't worry Rei-san. With a group composed of Sakura, Yukito-san, Li-san and Kero- chan, I think they'll be all right. They'll keep an eye on each other." Tomoyo commented as they watched them leave. "Yeah you're right, Tomoyo." Rei said. "The winds of change have started to blow our way." Eriol commented.
Tomoyo then smiled. Rei then said, "Who would have thought a simple girl like Sakura would be the salvation of us all?" Eriol then replied, smiling himself, "Now that's the mystery of fate and now we shall see the secret of destiny."
THE END
NOTE: Well what do you guys think? I know that it took me such a long time to update but it's really hard to do so since I was without a computer for almost four months and not to mention I don't have access to the internet. Well anyway, I finally finished a fan fic. It wasn't much but I do hope that I sparked an interest there. Thanks to all those who were kind enough to send in their reviews. I really appreciate it and well...it really helped me a lot not just for this fiction but for all the others as well. Please, I ask you for the last time for this fic to send in what you think because I really would like to know.
Anyway, I have other fic also, all on-going, some are also CCS while others are from other animes and video games as well as movies. I hope that you'll support that too. I'd really appreciate that. I really enjoyed your company and I really, really do hope that you like what I made. Like I said, this isn't much but I still hope you liked it. Thanks!
Michiko