A/N: Thanks to Karina and KnowInsight for the reviews on chapter 8. Enjoy!.
Chapter 9
Legolas left Elewen supposedly to rest, but rest was far from his mind. The events of the day kept running through his mind. He had known that Elewen was Noldor, but she was more complex than he'd imagined. He'd been impressed by her swordsmanship when they'd entered the battle, but when she'd thrown herself into the thick of it, he'd known something had changed. She hadn't been trying to die, but she hadn't cared if she did die. The implications of that were confusing, to say the least.
There was also the matter of Elewen's healing abilities. The Elves were known as powerful healers, but her abilities were greater than what he'd expected. She'd told him that Melian had trained her in Doriath, and Elewen seemed to have learned well from her Maia teacher. Even in the midst of the battle, he'd seen glimpses of something… different. There was a glimmer of power in her that he'd seen in only a few others, Galadriel and Mithrandir among them. He had the feeling it would have taken more than an arrow or even a poisoned orc-blade to stop her.
Legolas tried to imagine living in Valinor. He looked forward to going there eventually, but here in the middle of a war, the reality of it was very far off. He would never see the Light of the Trees like she had, nor would he ever know the sight of Valinor before it was marred. Elewen had told him tales of Valinor and it sounded like bliss. She'd also told him about Beleriand and the rest of Middle Earth in the First Age, before Númenor ever came to be and before the world was changed. She'd lived in Doriath under Melian and Thingol's protection.
It was an interesting twist of fate that Elewen had come to Doriath in the first place. She'd followed Galadriel to Middle Earth and then to Doriath, but had left there at Melian's urging to go among the Men of Middle Earth and practice what she'd learned from the Maia. Melian had suggested it mostly for training, but Elewen had made it her life's work. It was a strange thing for an Elf to devote her time almost exclusively to helping Men, but it seemed to suit Elewen. Despite her power, she seemed to stay in the shadows, figuratively. She had no great desire for power, not any more. Over the course of many years, any desire she'd had for power had faded, and her desire was to help silently, without being noticed, because notice would hinder her work.
Legolas pondered this revelation. Elewen could have had her own kingdom, but she didn't desire that kind of power. He would never be a tyrant, but Legolas was a leader, and he dreamed of leading a people of his own. Where and when, he didn't know, but he hoped for it some day. With Elewen, it was different—she didn't want power.
Legolas finally came to the realization he'd been avoiding. Elewen had great power to heal, but didn't want to command. She might never return to Valinor, and he would not be content to stay in Middle Earth. He had initiated a relationship with her not out of true love, but loneliness. She had been there, in the midst of the war, and it had been easy to tell himself that he loved her, even when he didn't. What he felt for her was friendship, not love that would last for an eternity. She knew it, and she hadn't been worried about him when she went into battle. She had found a cause worth living—or dying—for, and she knew his life could continue without her. She wouldn't have minded if she'd died because she knew he would be all right. He might grieve, but he would have survived.
Sighing, Legolas went to find Elewen. There was still an hour until dawn, and he needed to talk to her. He found her still on the battlefield, helping with the wounded. The most serious injuries had already been seen to, and when he found her, she was wrapping cuts and scrapes. She glanced up as he approached.
"When you're free, could we talk?" Legolas asked quietly. Elewen nodded, and finished what she was doing. She could see the weight in his eyes, and she knew what it was he'd come to say. She stood and walked over to him, and he led her away from the Houses of Healing and out towards the gates of the city. Once they were far enough away for some privacy, he stopped.
"What is it, Legolas?"
Legolas considered his words carefully. "We have been friends and now more, but is it meant to be?" It was more blunt than he'd meant to be, but he could find no other way to say it.
Elewen sighed heavily. "I do not think so. You are a good friend, and I will always value that, but I do not think we should continue this relationship or marry. We would not be happy." It was disappointing, but necessary.
Legolas nodded. It was the same conclusion he'd come to. He pulled Elewen into a hug, holding her close. They might have dismissed notions of a romantic relationship, but they were still friends. They stood there for a few minutes, then walked through the fading night, making their way back to the Ranger camp outside the city.
A few hours later, Legolas and Gimli went into the city to visit Merry and Pippin. Elewen went with them to lend what aid she could to the healers. In the morning's light and with less confusion than the night before, the Warden questioned her presence.
"Lady, how does an Elf woman come to the midst of this battle?"
"I came with the Dúnedain to fight in the battle. I am well capable of fighting in battle. After all, I am still alive." He hadn't said it, but most Men considered women incapable of fighting, so she explained herself before he could ask. Still, she didn't tell him any more than he needed to know. She felt no need to explain herself to this Man. "I am also a healer, and I wish to give you what aid I may. I helped last night as well, but even an Elf is easy to overlook in such confusion as there was last night."
"Of course. There were two others who came at the lord Aragorn's call."
"Yes. They came with us on the journey here." Elewen sighed inwardly. This man was spending time questioning who she was and why she was there when they both could be helping with the wounded. "Sir, I came to help with the wounded. How I came here is of little importance."
"My apologies. If there is anything you require, please ask." With that, he bowed and wandered off to some other task. Exasperated, Elewen set to work, doing what she could for the wounded. It was almost enough to make her hide herself as she had in Rohan, but she still would have had to explain her presence, and it wouldn't have helped much.
The work that day was not as exhausting as the night before, but most of the healers had not rested and were working through a haze of exhaustion. Elewen relieved them when she could, giving them at least a few minutes to rest.
Midmorning, Elewen came to the boy she'd helped the night before. A young woman was sitting beside him, a very small baby in her arms. Elewen cleared her throat to announce her presence.
"Maria, this is the lady who helped me last night!" The boy's eyes lit up, then widened as he saw Elewen clearly for the first time.
"Is this your family?" Elewen asked.
"Yes, lady. This is my wife, Maria, and our newest little one. Our little girl is with Maria's parents."
"You must have had an exhausting time these last few days," Elewen said to the girl, who didn't look any older than Elena. "How is the little one?"
"She's small, and she was early, but I think she's all right. She's nursing well." The woman was clearly nervous around Elewen, but she answered the question as well as she could.
"May I see her?"
"Of course." The girl handed the infant to Elewen. Elewen took the baby carefully, looking her over for any signs of illness. She'd delivered a lot of babies before, but it was always a strange sensation. Elewen had always felt alone among Men, but she'd never been quite content among Elves, either. It was always a strange feeling to see Men's children born. It seemed like they were barely born when they grew old and died. Frail as Men were in general, the baby was strong, but the mother looked exhausted.
"I can watch her for a while if you'd like to rest," Elewen told her. It was unlikely that the girl would leave the Houses of Healing any time soon, and her husband was in no shape to watch the baby.
The girl hesitated, still in awe of Elewen, but nodded, too tired to argue. She curled up on the cot beside her husband and quickly fell asleep. Elewen sat down near them, rocking the baby. There were no other pressing things she needed to do, and the young mother needed rest. If not for her husband's injury, she would be resting with her parents, but she was here in the Houses of Healing, just another family member to the healers because she didn't look like she needed any assistance.
An hour later, the baby started fussing, and Elewen woke the young mother to feed the infant, then slipped away, the father's thanks following her.