November 12
The Ten Commandments of Quidditch (as recorded and commented upon by Oliver Wood, who remains faithful to the Quidditch gods and therefore gets to speak with them):
1. Thou shall have no other devotion besides that to the divine and noble sport of wizards, Quidditch. Thou shall think of nothing but bludgers and quaffles, Porskoff Ploys and Dopplebeater Defenses, etc, for the rest of thine days.
Comment: Girlfriends are an exception. Really. I'm not making that up to justify my own divided attentions, no, not me...
2. Quidditch comes before all else. No matter how tired, no matter how heavy the rain or how loudly the wind roars, no mater how long thine essay for thine nasty, greasy Potions professor (who shall spend eternity being pelted by rabid bludgers) must be, thou shall have practice. If not, thine team shall be curse'ed for all eternity.
Comment: I like this one. A lot.
3. Thou shall NEVER refer to Quidditch as "stupid", or worse, say it is "just a game". Death and Destruction visit all who do.
Comment: If only I could get Flint to use the words "stupid" and "Quidditch" in the same sentence. The above doesn't count cause I put quote around the words.
4. Thou shall do no activity but that which is Quidditch-related on a game day.
Comment: Yes, this includes eating. Damn.
5. Honor and respect thine team captain. Do not refer to him as "fanatical" or "insane". Do all that he tells you and let no complaints escape your lips during practice.
Comment: This one my team needs to work on.
6. Thou shall always play by the rules.
Comment: Flint...
7. Thou shall never tell someone affiliated with an opposing team even the smallest detail about thine team's strategies.
Comment: Thankfully, we don't have this problem. Unfortunately, neither does anyone else.
8. Thou shall not take another team's practice time.
Comment: FLINT...
9. Thou shall not attempt to lie to the referee.
Comment: FLINT!!!
10. Thou shall not wish that any of thine players has the attributes of any of the opposing teams' players.
Comment: My team kicks ass, end of story.
Adhere to these simple rules, and thou shall please the Quidditch gods and find thineself on the way to Quidditch Glory. So says Oliver Wood, High Priest of the Church of Gryffindor Quidditch. (Services held every Tuesday and at midnight before games. All parishioners are required to wear the ceremonial robes and must bring food or else suffer the wrath of He Who Has Not Eaten Because He Has Been Too Busy Practicing.)
The Ten Commandments of Quidditch (as recorded and commented upon by Oliver Wood, who remains faithful to the Quidditch gods and therefore gets to speak with them):
1. Thou shall have no other devotion besides that to the divine and noble sport of wizards, Quidditch. Thou shall think of nothing but bludgers and quaffles, Porskoff Ploys and Dopplebeater Defenses, etc, for the rest of thine days.
Comment: Girlfriends are an exception. Really. I'm not making that up to justify my own divided attentions, no, not me...
2. Quidditch comes before all else. No matter how tired, no matter how heavy the rain or how loudly the wind roars, no mater how long thine essay for thine nasty, greasy Potions professor (who shall spend eternity being pelted by rabid bludgers) must be, thou shall have practice. If not, thine team shall be curse'ed for all eternity.
Comment: I like this one. A lot.
3. Thou shall NEVER refer to Quidditch as "stupid", or worse, say it is "just a game". Death and Destruction visit all who do.
Comment: If only I could get Flint to use the words "stupid" and "Quidditch" in the same sentence. The above doesn't count cause I put quote around the words.
4. Thou shall do no activity but that which is Quidditch-related on a game day.
Comment: Yes, this includes eating. Damn.
5. Honor and respect thine team captain. Do not refer to him as "fanatical" or "insane". Do all that he tells you and let no complaints escape your lips during practice.
Comment: This one my team needs to work on.
6. Thou shall always play by the rules.
Comment: Flint...
7. Thou shall never tell someone affiliated with an opposing team even the smallest detail about thine team's strategies.
Comment: Thankfully, we don't have this problem. Unfortunately, neither does anyone else.
8. Thou shall not take another team's practice time.
Comment: FLINT...
9. Thou shall not attempt to lie to the referee.
Comment: FLINT!!!
10. Thou shall not wish that any of thine players has the attributes of any of the opposing teams' players.
Comment: My team kicks ass, end of story.
Adhere to these simple rules, and thou shall please the Quidditch gods and find thineself on the way to Quidditch Glory. So says Oliver Wood, High Priest of the Church of Gryffindor Quidditch. (Services held every Tuesday and at midnight before games. All parishioners are required to wear the ceremonial robes and must bring food or else suffer the wrath of He Who Has Not Eaten Because He Has Been Too Busy Practicing.)