Harry Potter and the Unfortunate Polyjuice Potion Chapter 2. By EternalSenshi, Colleen Lupin, and Lexi. We don't own HP. Please R&R. Count how many times we used the word 'dick' and you'll win a prize! (Colleen...)
BTW, thank you so much to Joe, meggie-moo-has-fun, and farleydunlop'04. We love you!
(The real) Harry and Ron burst open the door to the bathroom and called out Hermione's name.
"Come on, Hermione, we have loads to tell you!" Ron cried.
"Uh..." Hermionie stuttered.
Moaning Myrtle came out and laughed dreamily. "Gods, Harry, why didn't you tell me that you looked so good without clothes on?" she swooned.
Ron looked at Harry, bemused, while Harry blushed. "What are you talking about Myrtle?" Harry asked, embarrassed.
"Oh, those abs, and such a cute little butt --"
"MYRTLE! What are you babbling about?" Harry yelled.
"Over here!" she cried with glee, and went to the stall Hermionie was hiding in. "She's in there!" Myrtle said wickedly.
"Oooh, Myrtle, you horrid, horrid ghost! Harry! Ron! Don't come in!" Hermionie cried out, panicked.
"Come on, Hermionie, it can't be that bad. You don't have Milicent Bullstrode's nose or something like that, do you?" Ron said, trying to open the door. Hermionie tried to hold it shut.
"I'm serious, Ron! Don't come in!"
"You're not still her, are you?" Ron said, succeeding in opening the door a crack.
"DON'T YOU DARE!!" she screamed, her voice breaking, and shutting it quickly.
Ron and Harry looked at each other, then Harry said, "Oi, Hermionie, we're not going to laugh."
"You might want to kill me. I don't know why it's not working." Hermionie said pitifully. "By the way, I need your glasses, Harry."
Harry looked at the sink he thought he'd left them at, and noticed a blank spot where they were. "I wondered where they went." he said. "Look, please come out, Hermionie," Harry said kindly.
"Harry, you're being awfully nice, but --- RON!!" Hermionie cried as Ron finally opened the door.
Harry and Ron stood there as Hermionie covered her face. She finally dropped her arm, and Harry and Ron couldn't stop staring.
"Wicked," was all Ron could say.
Harry was beyond shocked. "You're...y...you're ME?"
Hermionie cleared her throat and looked down.
"Wait a minute," Harry received a smack from reality, "you didn't ...um...y'know ... right?"
Hermionie looked at him, confused. "Didn't what?"
"You know...look." Harry muttered, blushing madly.
"Oh -- um --- well, I..." Hermionie blushed, matching Harry exactly.
"Oh my God..." Harry said quietly, traumatized by Hermionie seeing his dick.
Ron burst out laughing. "Oh, I get it. Oh, this is great!"
"No it isn't!" Harry yelled, his voice shaking.
"Sorry Harry, but I didn't really know what -- I mean -- it was." Hermionie muttered.
"DIDN'T KNOW?!"
"Well, for your information, I used to be a girl!!" Hermionie said hotly.
"Oh, Hermionie, do you know how long it is?" Ron called out.
"No, do you?" Hermionie asked.
"RON!!" Harry cried.
"Oh yeah, it's about 5" something, I think --"
Ron never finished his sentence because Harry's thin frame pummeled him to the ground.
"Oi! Hermionie, get off!" Ron cried.
"That's the real Harry, Ron." Hermione said, sniggering.
"Gerrof, Harry!" Ron yelled, trying to shove him off. Suddenly, a thought struck Harry, so he let Ron go.
"Her...Hermionie, you don't still have...have..." Harry said, frightened.
"Have what?"
"Y...y'know..."
"Have what, Harry?" Hermionie said, suspicious.
"Oh, y'know!" Harry burst out.
"Harry, if I can say that you have a dick, then I can say you have boobs." she said angrily.
"All right! Do you still have those...things?" he said, making a gesture about two things in front of him.
"Oh, you're so immature, Harry Potter!!" Hermionie cried. "No, I don't have 'boobs', I HAVE YOUR DICK!!"
"STOP SAYING THAT!!" Harry shouted, his face the color of his Gryffindor badge.
Myrtle was giggling like mad, and they all resolved to gather their things and go.
"It's a good thing I have the cloak," Harry muttered to an invisible Hermionie-Harry.
"This is just so hilarious," Ron laughed.
They entered the common room and steered Hermionie up to their dormitory. Luckily, everyone was sleeping and the other Harry removed 'his' cloak.
"Okay, Ron, I'm going to have to ask you to ask Ginny for all my toiletries in the morning."
"Ah...why me?" Ron yelled.
"SHHHHH!!!"
"Oh, fine!" Ron gave in. As he left, Harry and Hermionie's gazes met.
"You're not going to...like shave my legs, are you?" Harry whispered.
"Who says I can't?"
"NO...no...you just -- you just can't!" Harry sounded close to tears.
"Oh, Harry, come on, this will be fun!"
"NO...no..."
Ron returned with her things, looking disheveled.
"What happened?" Hermionie asked.
"Do you know how long it took me to get up the stairs?!"
"Did you have fun?" Hermionie giggled.
"Oh, shush, you." Ron said sheepishly as he tossed her the bag.
"By the way, Ron...can I sleep with you?"
"What Hermionie?" Ron said, surprised. "Oh, well...I mean, sure if you were in girl form. I mean, I feel that way about you too, but as Harry it would be weird. So yeah, maybe later."
"RON! Not that, I mean, just sleep," Hermionie stuttered. "...you -- you want to...with me? Aw, Ron."
They started hugging and Harry curled up in a fetal position and began to whimper.
"Ahem..." Ron was on fire, and Hermionie-Harry with him.
"Okay, well, let's just go to bed." Hermionie sighed.
As Harry pulled the curtain around his four-poster he watched the most peculiar sight.
Ron and "Harry" were cuddling together...
***
Hope you enjoy it! More soon!
The crew.
BTW, thank you so much to Joe, meggie-moo-has-fun, and farleydunlop'04. We love you!
(The real) Harry and Ron burst open the door to the bathroom and called out Hermione's name.
"Come on, Hermione, we have loads to tell you!" Ron cried.
"Uh..." Hermionie stuttered.
Moaning Myrtle came out and laughed dreamily. "Gods, Harry, why didn't you tell me that you looked so good without clothes on?" she swooned.
Ron looked at Harry, bemused, while Harry blushed. "What are you talking about Myrtle?" Harry asked, embarrassed.
"Oh, those abs, and such a cute little butt --"
"MYRTLE! What are you babbling about?" Harry yelled.
"Over here!" she cried with glee, and went to the stall Hermionie was hiding in. "She's in there!" Myrtle said wickedly.
"Oooh, Myrtle, you horrid, horrid ghost! Harry! Ron! Don't come in!" Hermionie cried out, panicked.
"Come on, Hermionie, it can't be that bad. You don't have Milicent Bullstrode's nose or something like that, do you?" Ron said, trying to open the door. Hermionie tried to hold it shut.
"I'm serious, Ron! Don't come in!"
"You're not still her, are you?" Ron said, succeeding in opening the door a crack.
"DON'T YOU DARE!!" she screamed, her voice breaking, and shutting it quickly.
Ron and Harry looked at each other, then Harry said, "Oi, Hermionie, we're not going to laugh."
"You might want to kill me. I don't know why it's not working." Hermionie said pitifully. "By the way, I need your glasses, Harry."
Harry looked at the sink he thought he'd left them at, and noticed a blank spot where they were. "I wondered where they went." he said. "Look, please come out, Hermionie," Harry said kindly.
"Harry, you're being awfully nice, but --- RON!!" Hermionie cried as Ron finally opened the door.
Harry and Ron stood there as Hermionie covered her face. She finally dropped her arm, and Harry and Ron couldn't stop staring.
"Wicked," was all Ron could say.
Harry was beyond shocked. "You're...y...you're ME?"
Hermionie cleared her throat and looked down.
"Wait a minute," Harry received a smack from reality, "you didn't ...um...y'know ... right?"
Hermionie looked at him, confused. "Didn't what?"
"You know...look." Harry muttered, blushing madly.
"Oh -- um --- well, I..." Hermionie blushed, matching Harry exactly.
"Oh my God..." Harry said quietly, traumatized by Hermionie seeing his dick.
Ron burst out laughing. "Oh, I get it. Oh, this is great!"
"No it isn't!" Harry yelled, his voice shaking.
"Sorry Harry, but I didn't really know what -- I mean -- it was." Hermionie muttered.
"DIDN'T KNOW?!"
"Well, for your information, I used to be a girl!!" Hermionie said hotly.
"Oh, Hermionie, do you know how long it is?" Ron called out.
"No, do you?" Hermionie asked.
"RON!!" Harry cried.
"Oh yeah, it's about 5" something, I think --"
Ron never finished his sentence because Harry's thin frame pummeled him to the ground.
"Oi! Hermionie, get off!" Ron cried.
"That's the real Harry, Ron." Hermione said, sniggering.
"Gerrof, Harry!" Ron yelled, trying to shove him off. Suddenly, a thought struck Harry, so he let Ron go.
"Her...Hermionie, you don't still have...have..." Harry said, frightened.
"Have what?"
"Y...y'know..."
"Have what, Harry?" Hermionie said, suspicious.
"Oh, y'know!" Harry burst out.
"Harry, if I can say that you have a dick, then I can say you have boobs." she said angrily.
"All right! Do you still have those...things?" he said, making a gesture about two things in front of him.
"Oh, you're so immature, Harry Potter!!" Hermionie cried. "No, I don't have 'boobs', I HAVE YOUR DICK!!"
"STOP SAYING THAT!!" Harry shouted, his face the color of his Gryffindor badge.
Myrtle was giggling like mad, and they all resolved to gather their things and go.
"It's a good thing I have the cloak," Harry muttered to an invisible Hermionie-Harry.
"This is just so hilarious," Ron laughed.
They entered the common room and steered Hermionie up to their dormitory. Luckily, everyone was sleeping and the other Harry removed 'his' cloak.
"Okay, Ron, I'm going to have to ask you to ask Ginny for all my toiletries in the morning."
"Ah...why me?" Ron yelled.
"SHHHHH!!!"
"Oh, fine!" Ron gave in. As he left, Harry and Hermionie's gazes met.
"You're not going to...like shave my legs, are you?" Harry whispered.
"Who says I can't?"
"NO...no...you just -- you just can't!" Harry sounded close to tears.
"Oh, Harry, come on, this will be fun!"
"NO...no..."
Ron returned with her things, looking disheveled.
"What happened?" Hermionie asked.
"Do you know how long it took me to get up the stairs?!"
"Did you have fun?" Hermionie giggled.
"Oh, shush, you." Ron said sheepishly as he tossed her the bag.
"By the way, Ron...can I sleep with you?"
"What Hermionie?" Ron said, surprised. "Oh, well...I mean, sure if you were in girl form. I mean, I feel that way about you too, but as Harry it would be weird. So yeah, maybe later."
"RON! Not that, I mean, just sleep," Hermionie stuttered. "...you -- you want to...with me? Aw, Ron."
They started hugging and Harry curled up in a fetal position and began to whimper.
"Ahem..." Ron was on fire, and Hermionie-Harry with him.
"Okay, well, let's just go to bed." Hermionie sighed.
As Harry pulled the curtain around his four-poster he watched the most peculiar sight.
Ron and "Harry" were cuddling together...
***
Hope you enjoy it! More soon!
The crew.