Hey Ya'll! I'm back, sorry this took so long but I'm making up for it, I
should have another chapter up by Thursday. Thank you to Crazy4nc128,
anne198, banksiebabe99, Princess Bethy, breezyWAVES and Danish girl for
your nice reviews! I skipped a little, hope that's okay! Anyway I kind
mixed up this chapter so I hope you like it, I just love experimenting!
Tell me what ya think!
Three days later everyone was out of the hospital. Me and Charlie had decided to spend the night together watching movies while my parents went out of town. Terry was staying at Peter's house. I rolled my eyes when Charlie popped in The Rock, don't get me wrong it's a great movie the first thousand times. It was Charlie's absolute favorite. After about the first thirty minutes I had lost all patients so I got up and wandered around. Casey was reading, Coach was sitting at the kitchen table with a calculator, the checkbook, and what I like to call the migraine face. You know when your parent's are paying bills and there forehead wrinkles up and they sigh a ton. yep that's exactly what he was doin. I wandered in the den. I liked their house, it was technically an apartment but it seemed bigger than our house. It had a living room, kitchen dining, room, all the bedrooms and bathrooms and the den.
That's where I found Adam, curled up on the couch flipping through a book. Now every inch of my better judgment told me to stay the hell out of there. But I don't know, I guess curiosity killed the cat.
"Hey," I said entering the room.
"Hi Jesse," He said sounding nervous. He sat up revealing a space for me on the couch. I sat down feeding off his nervous energy.
"So, ah what you looking at?" I asked trying to sound cool, but not like I really cared that much.
"Oh it's just old pictures," He paused studying me for a second, then slid the photo album over just enough that I could see. They were a cute family the four of them. Adam couldn't have been more then six when the picture was taken. I flipped the page, it was weird but in less than twenty pages I'd seen this family grow up, the picture perfect family literally. There was a picture for every Christmas all vacations everything. Half the pictures were the nice posed type but the others were more informal they showed Adam mid eye roll my personal favorite, them baking cookies with Jason in a pink lacy apron, him and Ashley on previous dates and him and Nick just hanging out around the house. This was his life, I'd just seen Adam. The last page slightly freaked me out. There was a photo of Adam's parent's gravestones and the cut out of there obituaries.
"I know I'm a freak of nature. But my mom she was really in photography, she always told us to take pictures of life, the good and the bad moment because that is what makes life." Adam said staring at the page. It looked so final, I mean I knew his parent's were dead but this plain nailed the fact into your scull. "Um, Jesse, ah I'm really sorry about the accident and all." He kept shifting like he was really uncomfortable.
"It's all good," I said and I really meant it. "You know it's funny. When I first met you I hated you for no good reason, and now I have every right in the world and I don't." I said shaking my head. Maybe I'd been wrong about Adam. Well anyhow I decided to get out of there before the touching "Full House" moment came, I'm not really big on them. I headed back out to Charlie who was so wrapped up in his movie he'd never noticed I'd left. I had to laugh at him he was such a dork. ..
After Jess left I sat there slightly confused. I looked up at the clock and found it was only three. I decided to head out, maybe I'd go skating clear my head a little. I got up wand walked to my room to find my skates.
"What ya doing?" Jason asked poking his head in. Since I'd gotten home from the hospital some on had checked on me at least every five minutes. I sighed, the hospital had cleared me with the agreement I would attend therapy and take antidepressants.
"I was thinking of heading out to the pond, going skating."
"Are you allowed to with you collar bone being broke?" He asked, he was such a dork.
"I don't need my arm to skate dumbass." I said rolling my eyes at him.
"Okay." He replied throwing his hands up.
"You want to come?" I asked kind of wanting the company.
"I could go skating." He smiled. He went and grabbed his skates (Notice that he had his skates on him, Of course who doesn't travel with the ice skates lol) and we bundled up heading out. It was mid December and quite nippy outside. We skated the afternoon away just kind of hanging out being the dorks that we were.
"So," He stopped sitting down on a bench.
"So," I replied sitting down next to him. I could feel a big talk coming on.
"Adam, the accident and everything.. This is really freaking me out."
"Me too," I said starring down at my sling.
"I didn't know you felt like that. I thought we talked about everything and know I'm not sure what the hell's going on in your life and that scares me." He looked at me but I remained silent, what could I say? "Come on Adam say something."
"Truth," He nodded, "I never really thought about killing myself before, I guess it was more of a spur of the moment thing." I laughed slightly trying to break some of the tension. "I don't know what to do either, and I think I'm just as freaked out as you are." "You need help,"
"I'm not psycho,"
"Oh really, yeah and completely normal people decide spur of the moment to try to kill themselves and three other people." He said frustrated.
"Okay so maybe not. Maybe I am psycho."
"That's not what I meant, what I meant is I've talked to everyone and we don't know what to do maybe someone else could help."
"I guess."
"Look, I'll drop it. We can talk about it later with Casey and Gordon." I nod. He tried to continue normal conversation but I couldn't concentrate on anything he was saying. Why couldn't things be normal just for one day? I was sick of people asking me if I was okay and worrying about me. I was sick of felling like run over road kill all the time. Maybe this could be a good thing. Just maybe.
Well we did talk about it later, and it was decided I would see a therapist. That's weird saying that, I have therapist. I was suppose to stay out of school for a couple of days so bright and early Monday morning Gordon took me to meet my shrink.
The doctor's office was weird. Mainly because it wasn't a doctor's office it was a therapist office. There was a nice couch to sit on and lots of plants, they tried to make it look homey. Gordon kept biting his nails, something he dose when he's really nervous.
"Adam," An assistant called my name.. Gordon and I stood up. I was kinda gland he went in there with me. We followed her into another room. A woman turned and smiled over at me.
"Hi, you must be Adam. I'm Kristen Shultz." She said extending her hand. I shook it nodding. Gordon introduced himself and made sure it was okay if he sat in with us for a while. "So what is bring us here today?" She said sitting down. I looked over at Gordon who gave me a "your telling this story not me" look.
So I told her what happened. My parents died life sucks, I have no friends, I tired to kill myself. She listened intently and gave me some sympathy but didn't even try to tell me she understood. Which was nice. She kept asking questions though, like how that made me feel. And I know that's what therapist do, but it was still awkward for me. The one thing I have to give her is that she never told me what I did was wrong or that I shouldn't feel like this, or that I should be over it by now. At the end I looked up at her. I started crying somewhere through my story and was suddenly feeling like a big fat idiot. She gave me another big warm smile.
"That's quite a bit there." She said looking down at her watch. She stood up and crossed the room sitting down next to me on the big plush couch. "Alright Adam here's the deal it's normal to be going through all of this. And I want to help you thought it, but you got to be willing to let me. Did you like talking to me, do you feel any better?" She asked I looked at her. My first instinct was to say no. But maybe Casey and Gordon had the right idea; I did feel a little better. Well at least I didn't fell like throwing myself off the nearest cliff. Saying it out loud had made it seem so rash, almost childish taking that way out. So against every bone in my body I nodded.
"I do. I want to feel better." She smiled a nice big one for me.
"That's good." She looked over at Gordon, "Now I'm suggesting we start off strong, with Adam coming in at least once a week." Gordon nodded and gave me a little smile. "Now I'm also going to prescribe some mild antidepressants, to help you through the grieving process." She got up grabbing a pad of paper. She and Gordon talked over how I should take them and what exactly they would do. I sat there quietly while they finished everything up. We said our goodbyes and Gordon made me an appointment for next week.
Driving on the way home I looked over at him. "Gordon,"
"Yes Adam." He said watching the road.
"Thank you. For being there for me." He smiled over at me.
"I promised I'd try remember." I nodded. I smiled thinking back to our conversation. Getting back into the apartment reminded me of the fact not only had I tried to kill myself I dragged three other people into. Yep it's final I'm an ass. Do I get a point for being able to admit that to myself?
SO??? Well I hope ya dig it and I'll see you again very soon, I just have to read over the next chapter should be up before the end of the week!
Three days later everyone was out of the hospital. Me and Charlie had decided to spend the night together watching movies while my parents went out of town. Terry was staying at Peter's house. I rolled my eyes when Charlie popped in The Rock, don't get me wrong it's a great movie the first thousand times. It was Charlie's absolute favorite. After about the first thirty minutes I had lost all patients so I got up and wandered around. Casey was reading, Coach was sitting at the kitchen table with a calculator, the checkbook, and what I like to call the migraine face. You know when your parent's are paying bills and there forehead wrinkles up and they sigh a ton. yep that's exactly what he was doin. I wandered in the den. I liked their house, it was technically an apartment but it seemed bigger than our house. It had a living room, kitchen dining, room, all the bedrooms and bathrooms and the den.
That's where I found Adam, curled up on the couch flipping through a book. Now every inch of my better judgment told me to stay the hell out of there. But I don't know, I guess curiosity killed the cat.
"Hey," I said entering the room.
"Hi Jesse," He said sounding nervous. He sat up revealing a space for me on the couch. I sat down feeding off his nervous energy.
"So, ah what you looking at?" I asked trying to sound cool, but not like I really cared that much.
"Oh it's just old pictures," He paused studying me for a second, then slid the photo album over just enough that I could see. They were a cute family the four of them. Adam couldn't have been more then six when the picture was taken. I flipped the page, it was weird but in less than twenty pages I'd seen this family grow up, the picture perfect family literally. There was a picture for every Christmas all vacations everything. Half the pictures were the nice posed type but the others were more informal they showed Adam mid eye roll my personal favorite, them baking cookies with Jason in a pink lacy apron, him and Ashley on previous dates and him and Nick just hanging out around the house. This was his life, I'd just seen Adam. The last page slightly freaked me out. There was a photo of Adam's parent's gravestones and the cut out of there obituaries.
"I know I'm a freak of nature. But my mom she was really in photography, she always told us to take pictures of life, the good and the bad moment because that is what makes life." Adam said staring at the page. It looked so final, I mean I knew his parent's were dead but this plain nailed the fact into your scull. "Um, Jesse, ah I'm really sorry about the accident and all." He kept shifting like he was really uncomfortable.
"It's all good," I said and I really meant it. "You know it's funny. When I first met you I hated you for no good reason, and now I have every right in the world and I don't." I said shaking my head. Maybe I'd been wrong about Adam. Well anyhow I decided to get out of there before the touching "Full House" moment came, I'm not really big on them. I headed back out to Charlie who was so wrapped up in his movie he'd never noticed I'd left. I had to laugh at him he was such a dork. ..
After Jess left I sat there slightly confused. I looked up at the clock and found it was only three. I decided to head out, maybe I'd go skating clear my head a little. I got up wand walked to my room to find my skates.
"What ya doing?" Jason asked poking his head in. Since I'd gotten home from the hospital some on had checked on me at least every five minutes. I sighed, the hospital had cleared me with the agreement I would attend therapy and take antidepressants.
"I was thinking of heading out to the pond, going skating."
"Are you allowed to with you collar bone being broke?" He asked, he was such a dork.
"I don't need my arm to skate dumbass." I said rolling my eyes at him.
"Okay." He replied throwing his hands up.
"You want to come?" I asked kind of wanting the company.
"I could go skating." He smiled. He went and grabbed his skates (Notice that he had his skates on him, Of course who doesn't travel with the ice skates lol) and we bundled up heading out. It was mid December and quite nippy outside. We skated the afternoon away just kind of hanging out being the dorks that we were.
"So," He stopped sitting down on a bench.
"So," I replied sitting down next to him. I could feel a big talk coming on.
"Adam, the accident and everything.. This is really freaking me out."
"Me too," I said starring down at my sling.
"I didn't know you felt like that. I thought we talked about everything and know I'm not sure what the hell's going on in your life and that scares me." He looked at me but I remained silent, what could I say? "Come on Adam say something."
"Truth," He nodded, "I never really thought about killing myself before, I guess it was more of a spur of the moment thing." I laughed slightly trying to break some of the tension. "I don't know what to do either, and I think I'm just as freaked out as you are." "You need help,"
"I'm not psycho,"
"Oh really, yeah and completely normal people decide spur of the moment to try to kill themselves and three other people." He said frustrated.
"Okay so maybe not. Maybe I am psycho."
"That's not what I meant, what I meant is I've talked to everyone and we don't know what to do maybe someone else could help."
"I guess."
"Look, I'll drop it. We can talk about it later with Casey and Gordon." I nod. He tried to continue normal conversation but I couldn't concentrate on anything he was saying. Why couldn't things be normal just for one day? I was sick of people asking me if I was okay and worrying about me. I was sick of felling like run over road kill all the time. Maybe this could be a good thing. Just maybe.
Well we did talk about it later, and it was decided I would see a therapist. That's weird saying that, I have therapist. I was suppose to stay out of school for a couple of days so bright and early Monday morning Gordon took me to meet my shrink.
The doctor's office was weird. Mainly because it wasn't a doctor's office it was a therapist office. There was a nice couch to sit on and lots of plants, they tried to make it look homey. Gordon kept biting his nails, something he dose when he's really nervous.
"Adam," An assistant called my name.. Gordon and I stood up. I was kinda gland he went in there with me. We followed her into another room. A woman turned and smiled over at me.
"Hi, you must be Adam. I'm Kristen Shultz." She said extending her hand. I shook it nodding. Gordon introduced himself and made sure it was okay if he sat in with us for a while. "So what is bring us here today?" She said sitting down. I looked over at Gordon who gave me a "your telling this story not me" look.
So I told her what happened. My parents died life sucks, I have no friends, I tired to kill myself. She listened intently and gave me some sympathy but didn't even try to tell me she understood. Which was nice. She kept asking questions though, like how that made me feel. And I know that's what therapist do, but it was still awkward for me. The one thing I have to give her is that she never told me what I did was wrong or that I shouldn't feel like this, or that I should be over it by now. At the end I looked up at her. I started crying somewhere through my story and was suddenly feeling like a big fat idiot. She gave me another big warm smile.
"That's quite a bit there." She said looking down at her watch. She stood up and crossed the room sitting down next to me on the big plush couch. "Alright Adam here's the deal it's normal to be going through all of this. And I want to help you thought it, but you got to be willing to let me. Did you like talking to me, do you feel any better?" She asked I looked at her. My first instinct was to say no. But maybe Casey and Gordon had the right idea; I did feel a little better. Well at least I didn't fell like throwing myself off the nearest cliff. Saying it out loud had made it seem so rash, almost childish taking that way out. So against every bone in my body I nodded.
"I do. I want to feel better." She smiled a nice big one for me.
"That's good." She looked over at Gordon, "Now I'm suggesting we start off strong, with Adam coming in at least once a week." Gordon nodded and gave me a little smile. "Now I'm also going to prescribe some mild antidepressants, to help you through the grieving process." She got up grabbing a pad of paper. She and Gordon talked over how I should take them and what exactly they would do. I sat there quietly while they finished everything up. We said our goodbyes and Gordon made me an appointment for next week.
Driving on the way home I looked over at him. "Gordon,"
"Yes Adam." He said watching the road.
"Thank you. For being there for me." He smiled over at me.
"I promised I'd try remember." I nodded. I smiled thinking back to our conversation. Getting back into the apartment reminded me of the fact not only had I tried to kill myself I dragged three other people into. Yep it's final I'm an ass. Do I get a point for being able to admit that to myself?
SO??? Well I hope ya dig it and I'll see you again very soon, I just have to read over the next chapter should be up before the end of the week!