A cold breeze lifted the hair off Hermione's neck, sending a shiver through
her. She tried timidly to speak, and failed. Her words melted in her mouth
as those emotion-filled yet unreadable eyes looked at her.
Harry seemed to get more and more uncomfortable as the silence went on. He finally broke it, clearing his throat. "Um, thank you for the gift. I didn't expect you to get me anything, considering ... " His voice trailed off.
Hermione gulped. "It was no problem." So many thoughts were running through her head, and yet she found it horribly hard to get a single one of them out.
The silence was unbearable. "It's a beautiful day, isn't it?" The she cringed. How on earth was she going to strike up a conversation with comments on the weather?
Harry looked as awkward as she felt. "Yeah, bit cold, but it's nice ... "
Hermione nodded and stamped her feet lightly on the ground, hoping to get some feeling back into them. The silence was nearly as icy as the frost surrounding their feet, sending chills up her spine.
Finally Harry spoke again. "Why did you do it?"
Hermione's stomach clenched. Oh god. She suddenly did not want to have this conversation. She licked her lips. "D-do what?"
He gave her a sarcastic look. "You know what. Why did you read the journal?"
Hermione hugged her arms around her body in an attempt to keep warm. "I didn't know it was a journal. It was sitting on your desk and I wondered what it was, so I picked it up. And I saw my name. I don't know why I didn't put it down." Hermione glanced up to see his expression. It was still blank, but she sensed a hint of humiliation behind the walls covering up his beautifully expressive eyes.
He sighed and nodded. "What did you read though?"
Hermione gritted her teeth together. This was the part she'd been dreading. Telling him what she knew.
"I-I read the part about your summer," she said, hoping that telling him part of the truth would get her by for the moment, at least until they were someplace warmer. Her teeth were starting to chatter uncontrollably.
He gave her another look. "That's not all though. You read the parts about you and Ron. You read my feelings about you, didn't you?"
Her body was shaking with part terror, but mostly the terrible cold. "Yes!" she burst out, unable to contain it any longer. "Yes, all right? I read what you wrote about me. I wanted to know your real opinion of me. I wanted to know what you felt about me and whether it was anything like what I felt for you!"
She didn't know how it was possible, but the tears running down her cheeks made her insides turn colder. She would have brushed them away, but her hands were turning purple with the freezing cold, and she was beginning to lose feeling in all her fingers. Snow was settling in her hair and she knew her lips would be blue by now.
But now she'd gotten it out, she couldn't seem to stop, besides the fact that forming words with her mouth now seemed a harder task than any she'd performed before.
"I liked you too, okay, Harry?" she blurted out. "I nearly killed Lavender when she asked you out."
Harry's mouth formed an 'o' as his eyebrows rose, almost disappearing into his fringe.
Hermione rambled on. "You don't understand how much I wanted to tell you this, especially when Lavender cheated on you, but I just ... "
She never finished that sentence. She was too busy staring at Harry in shock. The boy's face had changed; despite the red nose, blue lips and pale cheeks, he managed to laugh. And laugh. And laugh. His voice echoed through the snow, resounding in her ears. All she could think about was the fact that the boy she loved so madly was standing in the middle of the snow, in front of her, having just listen to her confess her true feelings about him, and he was laughing at her. She nearly lost it.
She took a step backwards towards the castle. Her expression stopped him laughing although he was still smiling. Her eyes narrowed with anger.
"I just poured my heart out to you, telling you things I have never told anyone before, letting you in on some of the secrets I would have taken to the grave, and you LAUGH?" she yelled.
His face turned quickly to concern as he reached out his hand to calm her down. But she batted his hand away hysterically. Her eyes streamed with warm tears, which quickly turned to cold droplets of water on her face, reminding her of how cold it was.
"No. No! I come here to talk to you and stop us from being at odds with each other, and all you can do is LAUGH AT ME?" Her voice broke as she screamed. Her head felt strangely light. Everything seemed to be jeering her as she turned to run from him. She could hear him calling out after her, but she ran as fast as she could, as far away as she could get.
If she'd turned around, she would have seen Harry kicking the snow in frustration before starting to run after her. She would have seen the concern in his eyes. And she would have noticed the tears that dropped silently off Harry's cheeks and into the snow.
Harry seemed to get more and more uncomfortable as the silence went on. He finally broke it, clearing his throat. "Um, thank you for the gift. I didn't expect you to get me anything, considering ... " His voice trailed off.
Hermione gulped. "It was no problem." So many thoughts were running through her head, and yet she found it horribly hard to get a single one of them out.
The silence was unbearable. "It's a beautiful day, isn't it?" The she cringed. How on earth was she going to strike up a conversation with comments on the weather?
Harry looked as awkward as she felt. "Yeah, bit cold, but it's nice ... "
Hermione nodded and stamped her feet lightly on the ground, hoping to get some feeling back into them. The silence was nearly as icy as the frost surrounding their feet, sending chills up her spine.
Finally Harry spoke again. "Why did you do it?"
Hermione's stomach clenched. Oh god. She suddenly did not want to have this conversation. She licked her lips. "D-do what?"
He gave her a sarcastic look. "You know what. Why did you read the journal?"
Hermione hugged her arms around her body in an attempt to keep warm. "I didn't know it was a journal. It was sitting on your desk and I wondered what it was, so I picked it up. And I saw my name. I don't know why I didn't put it down." Hermione glanced up to see his expression. It was still blank, but she sensed a hint of humiliation behind the walls covering up his beautifully expressive eyes.
He sighed and nodded. "What did you read though?"
Hermione gritted her teeth together. This was the part she'd been dreading. Telling him what she knew.
"I-I read the part about your summer," she said, hoping that telling him part of the truth would get her by for the moment, at least until they were someplace warmer. Her teeth were starting to chatter uncontrollably.
He gave her another look. "That's not all though. You read the parts about you and Ron. You read my feelings about you, didn't you?"
Her body was shaking with part terror, but mostly the terrible cold. "Yes!" she burst out, unable to contain it any longer. "Yes, all right? I read what you wrote about me. I wanted to know your real opinion of me. I wanted to know what you felt about me and whether it was anything like what I felt for you!"
She didn't know how it was possible, but the tears running down her cheeks made her insides turn colder. She would have brushed them away, but her hands were turning purple with the freezing cold, and she was beginning to lose feeling in all her fingers. Snow was settling in her hair and she knew her lips would be blue by now.
But now she'd gotten it out, she couldn't seem to stop, besides the fact that forming words with her mouth now seemed a harder task than any she'd performed before.
"I liked you too, okay, Harry?" she blurted out. "I nearly killed Lavender when she asked you out."
Harry's mouth formed an 'o' as his eyebrows rose, almost disappearing into his fringe.
Hermione rambled on. "You don't understand how much I wanted to tell you this, especially when Lavender cheated on you, but I just ... "
She never finished that sentence. She was too busy staring at Harry in shock. The boy's face had changed; despite the red nose, blue lips and pale cheeks, he managed to laugh. And laugh. And laugh. His voice echoed through the snow, resounding in her ears. All she could think about was the fact that the boy she loved so madly was standing in the middle of the snow, in front of her, having just listen to her confess her true feelings about him, and he was laughing at her. She nearly lost it.
She took a step backwards towards the castle. Her expression stopped him laughing although he was still smiling. Her eyes narrowed with anger.
"I just poured my heart out to you, telling you things I have never told anyone before, letting you in on some of the secrets I would have taken to the grave, and you LAUGH?" she yelled.
His face turned quickly to concern as he reached out his hand to calm her down. But she batted his hand away hysterically. Her eyes streamed with warm tears, which quickly turned to cold droplets of water on her face, reminding her of how cold it was.
"No. No! I come here to talk to you and stop us from being at odds with each other, and all you can do is LAUGH AT ME?" Her voice broke as she screamed. Her head felt strangely light. Everything seemed to be jeering her as she turned to run from him. She could hear him calling out after her, but she ran as fast as she could, as far away as she could get.
If she'd turned around, she would have seen Harry kicking the snow in frustration before starting to run after her. She would have seen the concern in his eyes. And she would have noticed the tears that dropped silently off Harry's cheeks and into the snow.