TITLE: Underneath It All
RATING: PG-13, to be safe.
SPOILERS: Do the Math, and I think probably Anonymous, now that I think of it.
PAIRING: J/A
DISCLAIMER: I do not own these characters or Joan of Arcadia. Barbara Hall owns them.
Author's Note: This is the last chapter to this story. Let me know what you have thought of the story over all. The reviews have been very helpful, and I thank you for them. This story has been very enjoyable to write, and I plan on writing many more Joan Of Arcadia fan fiction. Some have wanted a sequel to this story, let me know if you feel the same way! I might be convinced to continue further. Thanks so much to everyone! Enjoy!
.
Chapter 5: Meant To Be
.
"Oh , Adam," Joan breathed heavily, noticeably unsure of what to say or do. Recently it seemed as if there were no words for anything that was happening in her life or those that she cared about. This was no different. When Adam told her he wanted to take her somewhere, she didn't expect this. She didn't expect to be standing in a dark hospital room save for the dim light coming from a small lamp. She didn't expect to be holding onto Adam's hand as tightly as she could, not only for his comfort, but also for her fear, as well. She didn't expect to see Adam's father, Carl Rove, lying in a hospital bed. And she didn't expect to hear the word cancer.
Looking to Adam, she saw his gaze never leaving his father. A shadow of light danced across his face, the same shadow from the night she had first asked him about his problem. Joan knew she had to ask him a difficult question, knew that she had been asking herself the same question for the past week. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" she asked softly.
Adam didn't feel hurt by the question. He knew he had acted suspicious, but he did have his reasons. "I'm sorry, Jane. I didn't want to drag you into this again." Joan watched as Adam moved to a chair by the bed, sitting heavily with great exhaustion. She moved behind him, placing her hands on his shoulders.
Joan only whispered from behind, with great emotion and forgiveness, "Talk to me now."
Adam hesitated, not sure how far he wanted to go. This was a reason for his delay in telling Joan, unsure of what to say. There was more to say than just 'my dad's sick', Adam thought. He looked down at his hands, beginning to feel his courage leave his body. Knowing he had to say something soon, he began again, "My dad and I decided to keep it to ourselves. Thought it was best."
Joan pressed a little, "Why?"
Adam looked to his father sleeping soundly under the drug the nurses had given him. So he wouldn't hear any of this. "It took a lot for us to get over my mother. My dad kept his sadness to himself. I talked to Grace a little, but ..." he paused there, leaning back fully in the chair. He finally glanced up at the darkness of the room, feeling his watery eyes. "You're the only one that knows so much about my mother, what I went through. How much I miss her."
Joan bent down to wrap her arms around him from behind, placing a kiss on his cheek. "Good ripples," she whispered.
Adam allowed his head to lie back against Joan, as he answered, "It took me so long to get over my mother, yo. I made my pieces for her. My dad's pride in them helped me show them to people. His faith in me. How can I deal with both of them gone, Jane?" It was only then that Joan saw the tears, tracing his cheeks, leaving behind in their wake his years of sadness and loss.
Joan moved around to sit on the armchair, and he immediately allowed her to wrap an arm around him, allowed her to place his head against her heart, allowed her to lay her head against his that was buried in her endless strength. He then wrapped her arms around her waist, and suddenly he felt he could do the impossible. He felt he could face this challenge. He felt he could.
Joan laced her fingers in his hair, kissing the top of his head, and resting her cheek on it again. She hugged him until he stopped crying. She hugged him until she gave him the strength he needed. She hugged him with her endless love for him. They weren't going to let go from this day forward.
..............
.................
Will couldn't sleep. He found himself downstairs, grabbing the milk, and warming it up in the microwave. It had worked before and he only hoped it would work now. With the stress of work, and of course the stress of his family, specifically Luke, his mind was whirling. Looking for solitude in milk seemed to be the last resort. As he thought about his problems with Luke, the door suddenly opened. Will turned to see Joan walking in, her mood quite apparent. She had been crying.
"You're home a little late," Will observed.
Joan just shrugged, tossing her bag to the floor, then her coat. She walked over to the island in the kitchen, pushing herself up to sit on it. Will saw her heavy concerns, her mind full of endless problems. He only smiled, observing how similar he and his daughter actually were. They certainly dealt with their problems in the same way, both many times hiding their pain, and when they finally did show it, it was overwhelming. Joan finally spoke, "It's been a rough night." She then looked to him, seeing his concern.
He walked over to her. "Care to talk about it?"
Joan smirked a little, "Not much to say. Adam's father has cancer."
Will suddenly felt his heart sink, feeling there was only one question to ask. "What kind of cancer?"
Joan looked down to her hands. "Colon cancer." Will moved to her, placing his arms around her, hugging her. She laid her head on his shoulder. "Daddy, I'm scared."
Will nodded, hugging her more. "I know, honey. They have had success with this type of cancer. It doesn't mean he'll die."
Joan then released, looking to him. "Adam's so hurt. I don't even know what to do for him."
Will took her hands in his. "All you can do is be there for him. Make him feel better about the situation. Be strong."
Joan's face showed her disbelief of such a concept, crestfallen in its definition. "I don't know if I can do it, Daddy. I don't know ..." she stopped, and found herself crying again and Will only hugged her.
"You can. You have a strong heart, Joan. You always have," Will replied, trying to comfort her, but she continued to cry. Will knew this had already taken a lot out of her, and the days to come would do so, as well. All he could was be her strength, and hope that would be enough.
...............
..................
Joan found herself standing against the lockers, waiting for Grace to get ready for class. Sleep had helped her a little, and she felt slightly better than the night before. It had all just been so sudden, and feeling the hurt that Adam displayed was almost too much for her. She knew she had to be strong for him, and knew it was important for her to be someone he could lean on. Now knowing his secret, she realized how important she was to him, and how important their relationship was.
"Girardi?" Grace asked, seeing that Joan was in a far away land. Grace smirked, and this time shouted, "Girardi!" Joan suddenly popped her head to her, confusion lacing her features.
"What?" Joan asked innocently.
Grace only nodded slightly. "Hang in there." Joan smiled, feeling a little more strength enter her soul. "Remember, I was there when his mother died. It was tough. He still didn't tell me much, but it was enough. This time, he told me some, but ... I have a feeling that the planets are finally aligned correctly." Joan couldn't help but smile at that analogy, feeling that the fact that Adam had told Grace was only a small incident in the vast array of history. Grace continued, "He didn't tell me much. Like I said, I'm not taking him away from you." As she said this, Adam stepped up to them. He immediately grabbed Joan's hand.
"Hey," Adam said, his mood showing true happiness in comparison to the past few days.
Joan smiled at him, stating the obvious. "You look happy."
Adam nodded, reaching over to her, whispering something in her ear. Joan smiled widely, and then giggled. Grace rolled her eyes, and began to leave. "Ok, one can only handle so much of this. I'll see you guys later."
Adam only responded as she left, "See ya, Grace." He then turned to Joan, waiting for an answer to the question he had whispered in her ear. "Jane?"
Joan nodded, "Yeah, I'll meet you."
Adam smiled, "Great. See you after school, yo." He then quickly left. Joan was obviously as bit confused, but not much more could surprise her now.
..............
..............
Joan began walking towards the playground, the place where Adam had wanted to meet her. She stopped at the fence, leaning against it, watching kids play basketball, seeing many others swinging. Feeling her childlike inclination kicking in, she walked around the fence to the swings, and sat down on one. Joan had a weak spot for swings, and loved just allowing herself to hang like this. It made her feel free as she pushed herself a little with her feet.
"You've always loved swings," a small voice said next to her, and she looked to see little girl God staring at her, also swinging. He smiled widely. "In fact, it made you happy to swing."
Joan nodded, looking to the grass. "How can this happen to Adam again? Why? Why are you allowing this to happen?"
God jumped off His swing and walked over to her. "You know that I cannot give out miracles, Joan. And when bad things happen, they just happen. I don't cause them. They have many reasons for happening, from people's decisions to mere chance of genes, but I am not in that equation. The biggest challenge is what you do with the difficult events that happen in your life."
Joan sighed deeply. "I can't imagine losing both of my parents."
God spoke up quickly, "Who says Adam will lose his father?"
Joan looked up quickly, replying with passion, "Well, he has cancer, and ... he's very ill. And with his mother ...". However, Joan stopped, realizing what she was doing, what she was thinking. "I'm making assumptions." She looked away from God, feeling her heart beating quickly with the massiveness of her latest task. Yet she still didn't learn, she still didn't see. "I should've reassured Adam last night, told it was going to be ok," Joan said, feeling tears grabbing at her eyes.
God stepped closer, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It's takes people a few times to understand, Joan. Remember that I'm all about second chances. Have faith in me." God then walked away. As He did, Adam suddenly appeared in Joan's sight across the playground. He smiled openly, and walked quickly over to her.
"Jane," he called, meeting up with her and sitting on a swing next to her. Joan smiled, not understanding his happiness.
"What's going on?"
Adam replied, "Cha, my dad's coming home in a few days. Isn't that great? They said he's recovering much better since yesterday." Joan smiled openly, reaching over to grab his hand. Adam continued, "I wanted to thank you, Jane, for being with me last night. Helping me."
Joan shook her head with disgust. "I could've done better."
Adam insisted, "Jane, suddenly my dad is doing better, and it's been ever since I've told, yo."
Joan smiled, shrugging. "Maybe he was doing better all along." Joan suddenly felt the events of the past few days finally begin to make sense. Joan had been overly worried about Adam because of his attitude, and let her emotions, concerning his need to tell Grace and her mother, overcome her role. It was a role that needed to be defined by Adam, which was promptly defined very quickly, despite her emotions making it feel like it had taken forever.
God was, of course, correct, Joan thought to herself. Assumptions are dangerous. They make people believe certain things when there's no reason to, just as Joan had done. Not only did she let them overtake her friendships and the situations the past few days, but she also let it overcome her role as Adam's friend, above all else. She did have a tendency to make conclusions quickly, but who didn't? Joan laughed at herself, sensing then the importance of listening. Suddenly everything made sense.
Joan looked to Adam, who squeezed her hand, smiling widely at her. He then stood up, walked behind her, and pushed her on the swing. Joan laughed openly as she felt the freedom once again.
...................
......................
Spend all your time waiting
for that second chance
for a break that would make it okay
.
Now a week later, a Friday, Joan felt her relationship was finally where it needed to be right now. Everything had gone quite smoothly, and even though it seemed like, once again, God had no idea what He was doing, he always did. Joan realized that every time she did an assignment, and realized that having faith in his advice was her only way to sanity. It was where her thoughts were right now as she watched Adam walk into her living room, popcorn in a bowl.
.
there's always one reason
to feel not good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day
.
Adam looked to her with a small smile, and Joan felt her life was complete when she saw it.
.
I need some distraction
oh beautiful release
.
Joan clasped Adam's hand, seeing his anxiety lessen every minute he was there with her. Of course, there was good news to celebrate concerning his father, and it was wonderful that his recovery had begun.
.
memory seeps from my veins
let me be empty
and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
.
However, the worry only lessened, yet did not leave. Joan knew now what they're relationship was.
.
in the arms of an angel
fly away from here
..........................
That same night, Will knew it was time to talk to his son. He had been putting it off for the past few days. It was up to him to make the first step, but he couldn't do it alone. It was true that he had a tendency to ask Kevin and Joan more about their lives than he did Luke, but that didn't mean he loved him any less. It was an aspect of their relationship that needed to be fixed. Will decided that tonight would be the night to change that, to make their relationship better.
.
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
.
He walked the quiet hall on the second floor of his house, heading towards Luke's room. His light was on, and it was apparent that he was still up, working on some science project, as he always did. Will sighed heavily, and then knocked on the door.
.
let me be empty
and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
.
He heard a faint 'come in', opened the door, and saw Luke fixing one of the many lights he used for his experiments. Luke looked up to see Will staring at him, smiling. He smiled back at his father, and Will soon entered completely, shutting the door behind him.
.
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
.
..................................
Joan had gotten up during the movie quickly to get something to drink. Adam had been much better that night, and she knew he would be okay for the days to come. Of course, she would always worry for him. She cared for him too much not to. Joan liked caring for Adam, liked knowing everything she could about him. It was a relationship she intended on hanging on to, one that she didn't see ending. Joan was only happy that she could help him as she did, even if it didn't seem so.
.
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort there
.
Walking out of the kitchen into the living room, she saw the movie had progressed about 10 minutes. Joan smirked, realizing she had been gone longer than she had intended. She also didn't realize that it had started to rain, which was hard to hear over the movie.
.
so tired of the straight line
and everywhere you turn
there's vultures and thieves at your back
.
Reaching the end of the couch and setting the drinks on the coffee table, she was about to sit down, but saw that Adam had stretched out completely, on his back, and was now fast asleep. Joan smirked, laughing slightly to herself. Adam was cute when he was sleeping.
.
and the storm keeps on twisting
you keep on building the lie
that you make up for all that you lack
.
Joan walked to the other end of the couch, turned the movie off, climbed behind Adam on the couch, and stretched out next to him. He still didn't move. Adam slept very deeply, Joan observed, remembering the last time they had ended up like this. She propped her head up slightly, just enough to look down at him.
.
it don't make no difference
escaping one last time
it's easier to believe
.
Joan placed a hand on his cheek, sensing the quietness now compared to the last few days. The calm. Her fingers tousled his hair lightly, and she gently traced her hands through it.
.
in this sweet madness oh
this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
.
If it was possible, Adam was even calmer, having slipped into that deep slumber just a little further. It was then that she began to hear the rain pattering on the windows lightly, as well as the roof.
.
in the arms of an angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
.
Joan then positioned herself to lay her head on his shoulder, wrapping her arm around his stomach. She never tired of making him feel this way, Joan thought, knowing she had thought this a dozen times. Being more convinced of her importance to him now, Joan felt a new sense of commitment to their relationship. Felt that Adam was hers, and she was Adams. They belonged. They matched well. Knowing this assured her that they would always take care of each other.
.
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
.
It was what Joan intended on doing right now as she snuggled closer to him, carrying him in her comforting embrace.
.
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort there
All they needed was each other.
.
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here
.
It was then Joan felt Adam's arms wrapping around her, and she knew all was revealed. Only the rain complimented her endless thoughts, continuously pattering lightly all around them, and soon she was fast asleep.
.
*See them on couch, goes to black
*End scene with last bit of the song "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan
*Credits
Author's Note: I also do not own the song "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan, of course. Reviews Welcome!
RATING: PG-13, to be safe.
SPOILERS: Do the Math, and I think probably Anonymous, now that I think of it.
PAIRING: J/A
DISCLAIMER: I do not own these characters or Joan of Arcadia. Barbara Hall owns them.
Author's Note: This is the last chapter to this story. Let me know what you have thought of the story over all. The reviews have been very helpful, and I thank you for them. This story has been very enjoyable to write, and I plan on writing many more Joan Of Arcadia fan fiction. Some have wanted a sequel to this story, let me know if you feel the same way! I might be convinced to continue further. Thanks so much to everyone! Enjoy!
.
Chapter 5: Meant To Be
.
"Oh , Adam," Joan breathed heavily, noticeably unsure of what to say or do. Recently it seemed as if there were no words for anything that was happening in her life or those that she cared about. This was no different. When Adam told her he wanted to take her somewhere, she didn't expect this. She didn't expect to be standing in a dark hospital room save for the dim light coming from a small lamp. She didn't expect to be holding onto Adam's hand as tightly as she could, not only for his comfort, but also for her fear, as well. She didn't expect to see Adam's father, Carl Rove, lying in a hospital bed. And she didn't expect to hear the word cancer.
Looking to Adam, she saw his gaze never leaving his father. A shadow of light danced across his face, the same shadow from the night she had first asked him about his problem. Joan knew she had to ask him a difficult question, knew that she had been asking herself the same question for the past week. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" she asked softly.
Adam didn't feel hurt by the question. He knew he had acted suspicious, but he did have his reasons. "I'm sorry, Jane. I didn't want to drag you into this again." Joan watched as Adam moved to a chair by the bed, sitting heavily with great exhaustion. She moved behind him, placing her hands on his shoulders.
Joan only whispered from behind, with great emotion and forgiveness, "Talk to me now."
Adam hesitated, not sure how far he wanted to go. This was a reason for his delay in telling Joan, unsure of what to say. There was more to say than just 'my dad's sick', Adam thought. He looked down at his hands, beginning to feel his courage leave his body. Knowing he had to say something soon, he began again, "My dad and I decided to keep it to ourselves. Thought it was best."
Joan pressed a little, "Why?"
Adam looked to his father sleeping soundly under the drug the nurses had given him. So he wouldn't hear any of this. "It took a lot for us to get over my mother. My dad kept his sadness to himself. I talked to Grace a little, but ..." he paused there, leaning back fully in the chair. He finally glanced up at the darkness of the room, feeling his watery eyes. "You're the only one that knows so much about my mother, what I went through. How much I miss her."
Joan bent down to wrap her arms around him from behind, placing a kiss on his cheek. "Good ripples," she whispered.
Adam allowed his head to lie back against Joan, as he answered, "It took me so long to get over my mother, yo. I made my pieces for her. My dad's pride in them helped me show them to people. His faith in me. How can I deal with both of them gone, Jane?" It was only then that Joan saw the tears, tracing his cheeks, leaving behind in their wake his years of sadness and loss.
Joan moved around to sit on the armchair, and he immediately allowed her to wrap an arm around him, allowed her to place his head against her heart, allowed her to lay her head against his that was buried in her endless strength. He then wrapped her arms around her waist, and suddenly he felt he could do the impossible. He felt he could face this challenge. He felt he could.
Joan laced her fingers in his hair, kissing the top of his head, and resting her cheek on it again. She hugged him until he stopped crying. She hugged him until she gave him the strength he needed. She hugged him with her endless love for him. They weren't going to let go from this day forward.
..............
.................
Will couldn't sleep. He found himself downstairs, grabbing the milk, and warming it up in the microwave. It had worked before and he only hoped it would work now. With the stress of work, and of course the stress of his family, specifically Luke, his mind was whirling. Looking for solitude in milk seemed to be the last resort. As he thought about his problems with Luke, the door suddenly opened. Will turned to see Joan walking in, her mood quite apparent. She had been crying.
"You're home a little late," Will observed.
Joan just shrugged, tossing her bag to the floor, then her coat. She walked over to the island in the kitchen, pushing herself up to sit on it. Will saw her heavy concerns, her mind full of endless problems. He only smiled, observing how similar he and his daughter actually were. They certainly dealt with their problems in the same way, both many times hiding their pain, and when they finally did show it, it was overwhelming. Joan finally spoke, "It's been a rough night." She then looked to him, seeing his concern.
He walked over to her. "Care to talk about it?"
Joan smirked a little, "Not much to say. Adam's father has cancer."
Will suddenly felt his heart sink, feeling there was only one question to ask. "What kind of cancer?"
Joan looked down to her hands. "Colon cancer." Will moved to her, placing his arms around her, hugging her. She laid her head on his shoulder. "Daddy, I'm scared."
Will nodded, hugging her more. "I know, honey. They have had success with this type of cancer. It doesn't mean he'll die."
Joan then released, looking to him. "Adam's so hurt. I don't even know what to do for him."
Will took her hands in his. "All you can do is be there for him. Make him feel better about the situation. Be strong."
Joan's face showed her disbelief of such a concept, crestfallen in its definition. "I don't know if I can do it, Daddy. I don't know ..." she stopped, and found herself crying again and Will only hugged her.
"You can. You have a strong heart, Joan. You always have," Will replied, trying to comfort her, but she continued to cry. Will knew this had already taken a lot out of her, and the days to come would do so, as well. All he could was be her strength, and hope that would be enough.
...............
..................
Joan found herself standing against the lockers, waiting for Grace to get ready for class. Sleep had helped her a little, and she felt slightly better than the night before. It had all just been so sudden, and feeling the hurt that Adam displayed was almost too much for her. She knew she had to be strong for him, and knew it was important for her to be someone he could lean on. Now knowing his secret, she realized how important she was to him, and how important their relationship was.
"Girardi?" Grace asked, seeing that Joan was in a far away land. Grace smirked, and this time shouted, "Girardi!" Joan suddenly popped her head to her, confusion lacing her features.
"What?" Joan asked innocently.
Grace only nodded slightly. "Hang in there." Joan smiled, feeling a little more strength enter her soul. "Remember, I was there when his mother died. It was tough. He still didn't tell me much, but it was enough. This time, he told me some, but ... I have a feeling that the planets are finally aligned correctly." Joan couldn't help but smile at that analogy, feeling that the fact that Adam had told Grace was only a small incident in the vast array of history. Grace continued, "He didn't tell me much. Like I said, I'm not taking him away from you." As she said this, Adam stepped up to them. He immediately grabbed Joan's hand.
"Hey," Adam said, his mood showing true happiness in comparison to the past few days.
Joan smiled at him, stating the obvious. "You look happy."
Adam nodded, reaching over to her, whispering something in her ear. Joan smiled widely, and then giggled. Grace rolled her eyes, and began to leave. "Ok, one can only handle so much of this. I'll see you guys later."
Adam only responded as she left, "See ya, Grace." He then turned to Joan, waiting for an answer to the question he had whispered in her ear. "Jane?"
Joan nodded, "Yeah, I'll meet you."
Adam smiled, "Great. See you after school, yo." He then quickly left. Joan was obviously as bit confused, but not much more could surprise her now.
..............
..............
Joan began walking towards the playground, the place where Adam had wanted to meet her. She stopped at the fence, leaning against it, watching kids play basketball, seeing many others swinging. Feeling her childlike inclination kicking in, she walked around the fence to the swings, and sat down on one. Joan had a weak spot for swings, and loved just allowing herself to hang like this. It made her feel free as she pushed herself a little with her feet.
"You've always loved swings," a small voice said next to her, and she looked to see little girl God staring at her, also swinging. He smiled widely. "In fact, it made you happy to swing."
Joan nodded, looking to the grass. "How can this happen to Adam again? Why? Why are you allowing this to happen?"
God jumped off His swing and walked over to her. "You know that I cannot give out miracles, Joan. And when bad things happen, they just happen. I don't cause them. They have many reasons for happening, from people's decisions to mere chance of genes, but I am not in that equation. The biggest challenge is what you do with the difficult events that happen in your life."
Joan sighed deeply. "I can't imagine losing both of my parents."
God spoke up quickly, "Who says Adam will lose his father?"
Joan looked up quickly, replying with passion, "Well, he has cancer, and ... he's very ill. And with his mother ...". However, Joan stopped, realizing what she was doing, what she was thinking. "I'm making assumptions." She looked away from God, feeling her heart beating quickly with the massiveness of her latest task. Yet she still didn't learn, she still didn't see. "I should've reassured Adam last night, told it was going to be ok," Joan said, feeling tears grabbing at her eyes.
God stepped closer, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It's takes people a few times to understand, Joan. Remember that I'm all about second chances. Have faith in me." God then walked away. As He did, Adam suddenly appeared in Joan's sight across the playground. He smiled openly, and walked quickly over to her.
"Jane," he called, meeting up with her and sitting on a swing next to her. Joan smiled, not understanding his happiness.
"What's going on?"
Adam replied, "Cha, my dad's coming home in a few days. Isn't that great? They said he's recovering much better since yesterday." Joan smiled openly, reaching over to grab his hand. Adam continued, "I wanted to thank you, Jane, for being with me last night. Helping me."
Joan shook her head with disgust. "I could've done better."
Adam insisted, "Jane, suddenly my dad is doing better, and it's been ever since I've told, yo."
Joan smiled, shrugging. "Maybe he was doing better all along." Joan suddenly felt the events of the past few days finally begin to make sense. Joan had been overly worried about Adam because of his attitude, and let her emotions, concerning his need to tell Grace and her mother, overcome her role. It was a role that needed to be defined by Adam, which was promptly defined very quickly, despite her emotions making it feel like it had taken forever.
God was, of course, correct, Joan thought to herself. Assumptions are dangerous. They make people believe certain things when there's no reason to, just as Joan had done. Not only did she let them overtake her friendships and the situations the past few days, but she also let it overcome her role as Adam's friend, above all else. She did have a tendency to make conclusions quickly, but who didn't? Joan laughed at herself, sensing then the importance of listening. Suddenly everything made sense.
Joan looked to Adam, who squeezed her hand, smiling widely at her. He then stood up, walked behind her, and pushed her on the swing. Joan laughed openly as she felt the freedom once again.
...................
......................
Spend all your time waiting
for that second chance
for a break that would make it okay
.
Now a week later, a Friday, Joan felt her relationship was finally where it needed to be right now. Everything had gone quite smoothly, and even though it seemed like, once again, God had no idea what He was doing, he always did. Joan realized that every time she did an assignment, and realized that having faith in his advice was her only way to sanity. It was where her thoughts were right now as she watched Adam walk into her living room, popcorn in a bowl.
.
there's always one reason
to feel not good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day
.
Adam looked to her with a small smile, and Joan felt her life was complete when she saw it.
.
I need some distraction
oh beautiful release
.
Joan clasped Adam's hand, seeing his anxiety lessen every minute he was there with her. Of course, there was good news to celebrate concerning his father, and it was wonderful that his recovery had begun.
.
memory seeps from my veins
let me be empty
and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
.
However, the worry only lessened, yet did not leave. Joan knew now what they're relationship was.
.
in the arms of an angel
fly away from here
..........................
That same night, Will knew it was time to talk to his son. He had been putting it off for the past few days. It was up to him to make the first step, but he couldn't do it alone. It was true that he had a tendency to ask Kevin and Joan more about their lives than he did Luke, but that didn't mean he loved him any less. It was an aspect of their relationship that needed to be fixed. Will decided that tonight would be the night to change that, to make their relationship better.
.
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
.
He walked the quiet hall on the second floor of his house, heading towards Luke's room. His light was on, and it was apparent that he was still up, working on some science project, as he always did. Will sighed heavily, and then knocked on the door.
.
let me be empty
and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
.
He heard a faint 'come in', opened the door, and saw Luke fixing one of the many lights he used for his experiments. Luke looked up to see Will staring at him, smiling. He smiled back at his father, and Will soon entered completely, shutting the door behind him.
.
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
.
..................................
Joan had gotten up during the movie quickly to get something to drink. Adam had been much better that night, and she knew he would be okay for the days to come. Of course, she would always worry for him. She cared for him too much not to. Joan liked caring for Adam, liked knowing everything she could about him. It was a relationship she intended on hanging on to, one that she didn't see ending. Joan was only happy that she could help him as she did, even if it didn't seem so.
.
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort there
.
Walking out of the kitchen into the living room, she saw the movie had progressed about 10 minutes. Joan smirked, realizing she had been gone longer than she had intended. She also didn't realize that it had started to rain, which was hard to hear over the movie.
.
so tired of the straight line
and everywhere you turn
there's vultures and thieves at your back
.
Reaching the end of the couch and setting the drinks on the coffee table, she was about to sit down, but saw that Adam had stretched out completely, on his back, and was now fast asleep. Joan smirked, laughing slightly to herself. Adam was cute when he was sleeping.
.
and the storm keeps on twisting
you keep on building the lie
that you make up for all that you lack
.
Joan walked to the other end of the couch, turned the movie off, climbed behind Adam on the couch, and stretched out next to him. He still didn't move. Adam slept very deeply, Joan observed, remembering the last time they had ended up like this. She propped her head up slightly, just enough to look down at him.
.
it don't make no difference
escaping one last time
it's easier to believe
.
Joan placed a hand on his cheek, sensing the quietness now compared to the last few days. The calm. Her fingers tousled his hair lightly, and she gently traced her hands through it.
.
in this sweet madness oh
this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
.
If it was possible, Adam was even calmer, having slipped into that deep slumber just a little further. It was then that she began to hear the rain pattering on the windows lightly, as well as the roof.
.
in the arms of an angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
.
Joan then positioned herself to lay her head on his shoulder, wrapping her arm around his stomach. She never tired of making him feel this way, Joan thought, knowing she had thought this a dozen times. Being more convinced of her importance to him now, Joan felt a new sense of commitment to their relationship. Felt that Adam was hers, and she was Adams. They belonged. They matched well. Knowing this assured her that they would always take care of each other.
.
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
.
It was what Joan intended on doing right now as she snuggled closer to him, carrying him in her comforting embrace.
.
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort there
All they needed was each other.
.
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here
.
It was then Joan felt Adam's arms wrapping around her, and she knew all was revealed. Only the rain complimented her endless thoughts, continuously pattering lightly all around them, and soon she was fast asleep.
.
*See them on couch, goes to black
*End scene with last bit of the song "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan
*Credits
Author's Note: I also do not own the song "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan, of course. Reviews Welcome!