Title: Clarity
Series: Lies in Redemption 10/?
Author: Althea
Feedback: althea@alexandria.cc or FF.net
Rating: R
Pairing: Harry/Lucius
Summary: Can two enemies find redemption in each other? Or will they be forever alone with the burden of others expectations.
Warnings: AR, Slash(Yaoi), possible OOC including dark!Dumbledore
Spoilers: All five books
Author's Note: Will be multi-parter will try to get at least one chapter out a week. Sorry will work as fast as I can but I have RL concerns as well. A two year old son, husband who works full time and goes to school and school myself. Will definitely finish this though I don't know how many parts it will be.
Archiving: Beloved Enemies, FF.net, and my own site all others just let me know so I can brag to my friends.
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The morning dawned bright and cold. It was the day that Harry and Draco would return to Hogwarts. It had been decided that instead of returning on the train, they would arrive via portkey to Hogsmeade and then go up the castle. This meant they had more time to spend before leaving with their family. Draco was actually glad to be getting back to school. He loved being with his father and it was much easier to spend time with Harry, whom he now regarded as his best friend, away from school; but he really wanted to see if Harry really could help him with his own love life.
Harry was unsure of what was going to happen. Lucius had given him a portkey to return whenever he wanted, but Harry wasn't sure if Lucius really wanted him to use it. He woke up early, cuddled next to Lucius. Lucius was still asleep and Harry watched his love's face, grateful for the opportunity to do so. He wanted to tell Lucius how much he would miss him, but didn't dare for fear of rejection. He knew that he couldn't bear to hear that, not now. He snuggled closer, seeking the warmth that he would have to give up once Lucius awoke.
Lucius came awake slowly, feeling a warm weight snuggling against him. He opened his eyes and looked at his angel. He didn't want to disturb Harry, but he did pull him close. Harry stiffened as he felt Lucius move; afraid he would be pushed away. Lucius wondered at his angel's reaction. "Harry, are you ok? Is something wrong?"
Harry sighed, fearing how to answer. "I'm fine. Nothing is wrong."
Lucius turned Harry's face up and looked into his eyes. "You are a horrible liar, Angel. Tell me what's bothering you. Is it Tom? Dumbledore? Your friends? What?"
Harry tried to turn away, but Lucius grip was firm. "I...I don't want to go back to Hogwarts. I don't know what will happen once I go back. I don't mean with my friends or Dumbledore." Harry paused, gathering his courage and whispered "I mean with you, with us."
Lucius was surprised at the answer he received. He had thought that they both understood each other, now he wasn't so sure. "Harry, nothing will change between us. I love you. This isn't a game; I'm not playing with you. I assume you feel the same, but maybe I am wrong if you are doubting me. I gave you the portkey so that you could come and visit. I want you to use it. I won't force you to though. I want you to be with me willingly." Lucius wondered how anyone could treat his angel in such a way to destroy his self-esteem so completely. At least he hoped that was all it was.
Harry shuddered, "I am with you willingly. I love you, too. I just don't understand what you can possibly see in me. No one else thinks I am worth all that much, why should you? Do you really want me to use the portkey? Do you really want us to have a real relationship?"
Lucius pulled Harry closer to him, "Yes, I really want a relationship. I am in love with you. Before you ask, yes I loved Narcissa, but I wasn't in love with her. We married for, other reasons. I love you with everything I am. I may not always show it the way you want me to, but I am trying to show you every way that I can. I hope that any time you need to see me or Tom and Sirius you will use the portkey. Even if you decide you don't want to see me at all, I hope that you will use the portkey to see them. I want you to be happy." Lucius leaned in and claimed his lips in kiss.
As their lips met, Harry leaned in feeling warmth suffuse his body. Lucius deepened the kiss and brought his hands up to cup Harry's face. He decided to show Harry how much he meant to him, and hope that his angel understood. He pulled back and looked into Harry's eyes. "Do you want this?"
"Yes, please. I need you inside me. I need to feel you."
With that Lucius dove in for another kiss. Their tongues met and Lucius stroked his along Harry's in a slow dance. One hand moved to cup Harry's arse while the other moved to play gently at his nipples. Harry moaned into his mouth. Harry's own hands were exploring every inch of skin they could. Lucius trailed kisses down his neck, biting and nipping gently to get the whimpers he loved out of Harry. He moved down and took the till now neglected nipple into his mouth, gently pulling with his teeth. He could feel Harry panting under him. His own breath was coming in harsh spurts. He needed to hurry; he didn't know how much more he could take. Harry always did this to him. Made him ache for completion, a completion that he could only find with his angel.
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He collapsed onto his angel and they clung to each other as passions and bodies cooled. Harry was sated and comforted that Lucius would not leave him. Lucius held tightly to his angel and slowly caught his breath. He asked gently, "Luc, huh? No, don't. I like it. I just wondered what made you say it." "I don't know. I just wanted to call you something special, something other then Lucius. You always call me angel, and I love it. I didn't know what to call you. Is it ok?"
Lucius smiled and kissed him gently on the lips. "Of course it is. We should head down for breakfast. I'm sure that Sirius and Tom will want to see you before you have to leave."
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In the Dining Room, Sirius and Severus were the only ones present as of yet. There was a strained silence as they each tried to figure out what to say. Severus was afraid that Sirius would hate him even more for kissing him. He was pretty sure that even though Lupin thought he was dead, Sirius was still loyal to him. He never meant to cause problems. He just couldn't resist those lips. Now he would have to face the consequences. Maybe Lupin never need know, he knew werewolves were very possessive of their mates.
Sirius was worried that Severus regretted kissing him. He didn't know why the other man kissed him, but he hoped that he could gather his courage enough to say something about it. He wanted to say that he enjoyed it, that he had wanted it for a long time and that he hoped it could happen again. He didn't know what Severus was thinking though. Finally, he couldn't take the silence any more. He gathered his Gryffindor courage and spoke. "I'm not sorry."
Severus' head shot up, "What?"
Sirius looked him right in the eye, "I'm not sorry we kissed. I know you probably are, but I wanted you to know I'm not."
Severus couldn't process what he was hearing. Did he just say he wasn't sorry? What about Lupin? "I don't understand. What about Lupin? I know he thinks your dead, but surely you would still be faithful to him?"
Sirius looked at him, puzzled. "Why would I care what Remus thinks? Why would being loyal to him have anything to do with you and me kissing?"
Severus looked at him in disgust, "As much as I may want to kiss you, I would think that loyalty to your lover would preclude your desire to kiss me. Even if such a desire does in fact exist." Then he seemed to realize just what he had said and shut up.
Sirius looked at him in surprise. "You want to kiss me? Really? Why haven't you ever done it before? Wait a minute, what? My lover? Remus? We aren't lovers! He's my best friend! Is that why? You thought he and I were together? Does that mean..."
Severus frowned, "It doesn't mean anything. Why would I want to ever kiss you? It was an accident, a mistake. I shouldn't have done it."
Sirius recoiled from the harshness of Severus' voice. "I'm sorry. I knew you would regret it, I just didn't think you would feel that strongly about it. I won't regret it though. I have waited for over twenty years for that and I will savor it. I thought you might have wanted to kiss me because you felt some of what I did. I'm glad you did it even if you aren't. I always thought you were in love with Remus. Maybe you are. I had hoped, but that won't happen now." Sirius turned away and so didn't see Severus look at him wonderingly.
"You wanted me to kiss you? Remus? You hoped what?"
Sirius didn't turn around, but answered quietly. "I had hoped you kissed me because you wanted to. That you cared for me at least a little, felt even a fraction of what I feel for you. I wanted you to want me and for you to kiss me again. I'm sorry. I didn't know how much you really hated me. I know I should have known, after all I have done to you. I just let myself hope."
Severus didn't say anything, he just grabbed Sirius' arm and spun him about. Sirius didn't even have time to respond to this before Severus claimed his mouth in a searing kiss. Once the shock had worn off he responded to the prodding of Severus' tongue on his own and returned the kiss in full measure. As they both came up for air, Severus spoke quietly against Sirius' ear. "I don't hate you. I kissed you because I too have wanted it for so long. I feel a great deal for you, I care for you. I never wanted us to be enemies; I just couldn't stand thinking about you with Lupin."
Just then Harry and Lucius both walk in and see the two men in an intimate embrace. They stopped in shock and then Severus saw them standing there. He turned Sirius around to face them and as this happened Tom and Draco both entered as well. Draco's eyes grew big with surprise as he saw the two men he would have thought least likely to tolerate each other actually touching each other with care. Lucius smirked at them, his shock having worn off. Tom just smiled a patient smile and sat down at the table. Harry grabbed Draco and then everyone else sat down as well.
They all ate brunch, not talking much. When they were finished, they all gathered in the Study to discuss any issues which needed to be addressed before Harry and Draco leave. They are all a bit nervous about Dumbledore discovering their ruse. Harry of course wants to know if he should talk to Remus about all that has happened. Sirius tells him to test the waters and if it seems like Remus would be receptive, tell him. Tom says a long goodbye to Harry, telling him to use the portkey for any reason he needs. Sirius hugs Harry and tells him to practice his animagus work. Lucius kisses him deeply and tells him to visit soon, He will miss his angel.
Soon Severus, Harry, and Draco are ready to leave. They all take the portkey and return to Hogsmeade. Although it is very cold, the sun is out so their walk up to the school is not too terrible. They had timed it so that they arrived just as the other students were arriving. They were able to blend right in and no one was the wiser. Before Harry and Draco went their separate ways, they ducked off out of site to say goodbye.
Harry smiled, "Well, it is going to be really weird not being able to talk to you whenever I want. Do you want to meet tonight so that we can talk some?"
Draco shrugged, "Yeah, sounds good. I have some of my mother's dream books, maybe we can see if our dreams mean something finally. Um, Harry, would you mind maybe talking to Remus for me? Maybe find out if he hates me or not? I mean I know he doesn't like me or love me or anything like that, but if he at least doesn't hate me I can work with that."
Harry grinned, "Of course, I will stop by tonight and find out. Where should we meet to talk?"
"Well, come down to Sev's rooms. I will make sure it's ok. No one will bother us there."
"Ok, great. Thanks. See you tonight."
"Yeah, tonight." Draco replied as they both walked away.
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Harry met up with Ron and Hermione, but he really wasn't in the mood to chat with them. He just listened as they went on about Christmas at the Burrow. He couldn't tell them that he had his best holiday ever. He couldn't really tell them anything. He felt guilty; but he also knew that even without Dumbledore, they would never understand. He missed Lucius already. So he decided to zone out and think about his love. He hoped he would have a chance to go and see him soon. As it got later, Harry decided it was time to go and see Remus. He told his friends that he wanted to talk to him about something he read. Harry made his way to Remus' room. He knocked quietly, and Remus opened the door almost immediately.
"Harry? Come in. What did you need?"
Harry walked in and turned towards Remus, "I need to talk with you about some things. First though, I need you to keep an open mind. Don't dismiss what I say without giving me a chance."
Remus motioned for Harry to have a seat and sat down himself. "Harry, I would never dismiss what you have to say. You are extremely observant and if there is something you feel you need to tell me, not only will I keep it in confidence but I will give it due consideration. Oh, but before we do this, I got you something for Christmas. I didn't send it because I didn't want to upset you. I thought it would be best to give it to you in person." With that he handed Harry a small wrapped package. Harry ripped the paper off and inside was a figurine of a grim-like black dog. It was a wizarding figure so the dog moved, pacing and barking on occasion. It looked just like Padfoot.
Harry hugged Remus, "Thank you. This will actually make some of what I have to say easier. The best way to do this is to jump in. What if Voldemort didn't kill my parents? What if Dumbledore has been lying to everyone since the beginning?" Harry then proceeded to tell the whole tale. All about Tom and Ada and even Sirius. Remus listened with a growing look of horror on his face. He never interrupted or tried to deny Harry's words. Only when Harry was through, did he say anything.
"Thank you for trusting me to tell me. This is a lot to think about. I would like to see Sirius. I know you would never lie, but he is my best friend. I would like to see him for myself. I will help you in any way I can."
Harry smiled, "Thanks, Remus. Actually I have a question for you. How do you feel about Draco Malfoy?"
Remus smiled, but his mind was racing. 'He can't know! Why would he ask me about Draco? No one knows, it can't be that! It has to be something else. No one knows I have found my mate. They can't! I have gone to too much trouble to make sure that no one finds out. He is too young; he was just a child when we met. Also he is a Malfoy and Lucius' son. He could never love a dark creature especially not one as old as me. He wouldn't even know what it means to mate with a werewolf. Gods, why did Harry ask about him?' "Why do you ask?"
"Well, I told you about our friendship? We can't let anyone know, lest it get back to Dumbledore. I thought maybe we could come down here sometimes to talk."
Remus let out a relieved sigh, "Sure, Harry. That would be fine. You can come here whenever you need. Draco isn't really that bad." 'I just hope I can resist the temptation. Draco doesn't need someone like me. He deserves better.'
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*Draco POV*
I hope Harry gets here soon. I really need to know if Remus hates me. Wait, do I really want to know? I don't think I can handle it if he does. Gods, how can I be so pathetic! I'm a Malfoy! I don't need anyone. Well, ok so that's a lie! I need 'him'! I love a man who can never love me. He's a werewolf. The only way he would want me was if I was his mate, and if I was he would have already claimed me. Sure I know all about werewolves. When you fall in love with one when you're only thirteen, you tend to learn everything you can.
I know that they can have relationships with anyone, but they only mate with one person. That person is their rightful mate. Only then do they mate and claim someone. They can find this person by smell and some innate sense that only a werewolf can really understand. The thing is, both the wolf and human parts have to agree on the mate, or the bond won't work properly and the werewolf can go insane. So, yeah, I know I have no chance with him. I just really need for him to not hate me. Only in my deepest heart do I have other thoughts. Secret and scary thoughts. Hopeful and desperate thoughts. Please let him love me.
TBC
This chapter is dedicated to b.m. aka Darth Kätzchen on the HarryxLucius ML, because of angsty!Draco. Next chapter.Harry and Draco talk If you want the lemon email me!
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Thanks to my reviewers: Eowyn6 and Lenora,
Hope you all keep tuning in. I love you all!
Series: Lies in Redemption 10/?
Author: Althea
Feedback: althea@alexandria.cc or FF.net
Rating: R
Pairing: Harry/Lucius
Summary: Can two enemies find redemption in each other? Or will they be forever alone with the burden of others expectations.
Warnings: AR, Slash(Yaoi), possible OOC including dark!Dumbledore
Spoilers: All five books
Author's Note: Will be multi-parter will try to get at least one chapter out a week. Sorry will work as fast as I can but I have RL concerns as well. A two year old son, husband who works full time and goes to school and school myself. Will definitely finish this though I don't know how many parts it will be.
Archiving: Beloved Enemies, FF.net, and my own site all others just let me know so I can brag to my friends.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The morning dawned bright and cold. It was the day that Harry and Draco would return to Hogwarts. It had been decided that instead of returning on the train, they would arrive via portkey to Hogsmeade and then go up the castle. This meant they had more time to spend before leaving with their family. Draco was actually glad to be getting back to school. He loved being with his father and it was much easier to spend time with Harry, whom he now regarded as his best friend, away from school; but he really wanted to see if Harry really could help him with his own love life.
Harry was unsure of what was going to happen. Lucius had given him a portkey to return whenever he wanted, but Harry wasn't sure if Lucius really wanted him to use it. He woke up early, cuddled next to Lucius. Lucius was still asleep and Harry watched his love's face, grateful for the opportunity to do so. He wanted to tell Lucius how much he would miss him, but didn't dare for fear of rejection. He knew that he couldn't bear to hear that, not now. He snuggled closer, seeking the warmth that he would have to give up once Lucius awoke.
Lucius came awake slowly, feeling a warm weight snuggling against him. He opened his eyes and looked at his angel. He didn't want to disturb Harry, but he did pull him close. Harry stiffened as he felt Lucius move; afraid he would be pushed away. Lucius wondered at his angel's reaction. "Harry, are you ok? Is something wrong?"
Harry sighed, fearing how to answer. "I'm fine. Nothing is wrong."
Lucius turned Harry's face up and looked into his eyes. "You are a horrible liar, Angel. Tell me what's bothering you. Is it Tom? Dumbledore? Your friends? What?"
Harry tried to turn away, but Lucius grip was firm. "I...I don't want to go back to Hogwarts. I don't know what will happen once I go back. I don't mean with my friends or Dumbledore." Harry paused, gathering his courage and whispered "I mean with you, with us."
Lucius was surprised at the answer he received. He had thought that they both understood each other, now he wasn't so sure. "Harry, nothing will change between us. I love you. This isn't a game; I'm not playing with you. I assume you feel the same, but maybe I am wrong if you are doubting me. I gave you the portkey so that you could come and visit. I want you to use it. I won't force you to though. I want you to be with me willingly." Lucius wondered how anyone could treat his angel in such a way to destroy his self-esteem so completely. At least he hoped that was all it was.
Harry shuddered, "I am with you willingly. I love you, too. I just don't understand what you can possibly see in me. No one else thinks I am worth all that much, why should you? Do you really want me to use the portkey? Do you really want us to have a real relationship?"
Lucius pulled Harry closer to him, "Yes, I really want a relationship. I am in love with you. Before you ask, yes I loved Narcissa, but I wasn't in love with her. We married for, other reasons. I love you with everything I am. I may not always show it the way you want me to, but I am trying to show you every way that I can. I hope that any time you need to see me or Tom and Sirius you will use the portkey. Even if you decide you don't want to see me at all, I hope that you will use the portkey to see them. I want you to be happy." Lucius leaned in and claimed his lips in kiss.
As their lips met, Harry leaned in feeling warmth suffuse his body. Lucius deepened the kiss and brought his hands up to cup Harry's face. He decided to show Harry how much he meant to him, and hope that his angel understood. He pulled back and looked into Harry's eyes. "Do you want this?"
"Yes, please. I need you inside me. I need to feel you."
With that Lucius dove in for another kiss. Their tongues met and Lucius stroked his along Harry's in a slow dance. One hand moved to cup Harry's arse while the other moved to play gently at his nipples. Harry moaned into his mouth. Harry's own hands were exploring every inch of skin they could. Lucius trailed kisses down his neck, biting and nipping gently to get the whimpers he loved out of Harry. He moved down and took the till now neglected nipple into his mouth, gently pulling with his teeth. He could feel Harry panting under him. His own breath was coming in harsh spurts. He needed to hurry; he didn't know how much more he could take. Harry always did this to him. Made him ache for completion, a completion that he could only find with his angel.
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He collapsed onto his angel and they clung to each other as passions and bodies cooled. Harry was sated and comforted that Lucius would not leave him. Lucius held tightly to his angel and slowly caught his breath. He asked gently, "Luc, huh? No, don't. I like it. I just wondered what made you say it." "I don't know. I just wanted to call you something special, something other then Lucius. You always call me angel, and I love it. I didn't know what to call you. Is it ok?"
Lucius smiled and kissed him gently on the lips. "Of course it is. We should head down for breakfast. I'm sure that Sirius and Tom will want to see you before you have to leave."
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In the Dining Room, Sirius and Severus were the only ones present as of yet. There was a strained silence as they each tried to figure out what to say. Severus was afraid that Sirius would hate him even more for kissing him. He was pretty sure that even though Lupin thought he was dead, Sirius was still loyal to him. He never meant to cause problems. He just couldn't resist those lips. Now he would have to face the consequences. Maybe Lupin never need know, he knew werewolves were very possessive of their mates.
Sirius was worried that Severus regretted kissing him. He didn't know why the other man kissed him, but he hoped that he could gather his courage enough to say something about it. He wanted to say that he enjoyed it, that he had wanted it for a long time and that he hoped it could happen again. He didn't know what Severus was thinking though. Finally, he couldn't take the silence any more. He gathered his Gryffindor courage and spoke. "I'm not sorry."
Severus' head shot up, "What?"
Sirius looked him right in the eye, "I'm not sorry we kissed. I know you probably are, but I wanted you to know I'm not."
Severus couldn't process what he was hearing. Did he just say he wasn't sorry? What about Lupin? "I don't understand. What about Lupin? I know he thinks your dead, but surely you would still be faithful to him?"
Sirius looked at him, puzzled. "Why would I care what Remus thinks? Why would being loyal to him have anything to do with you and me kissing?"
Severus looked at him in disgust, "As much as I may want to kiss you, I would think that loyalty to your lover would preclude your desire to kiss me. Even if such a desire does in fact exist." Then he seemed to realize just what he had said and shut up.
Sirius looked at him in surprise. "You want to kiss me? Really? Why haven't you ever done it before? Wait a minute, what? My lover? Remus? We aren't lovers! He's my best friend! Is that why? You thought he and I were together? Does that mean..."
Severus frowned, "It doesn't mean anything. Why would I want to ever kiss you? It was an accident, a mistake. I shouldn't have done it."
Sirius recoiled from the harshness of Severus' voice. "I'm sorry. I knew you would regret it, I just didn't think you would feel that strongly about it. I won't regret it though. I have waited for over twenty years for that and I will savor it. I thought you might have wanted to kiss me because you felt some of what I did. I'm glad you did it even if you aren't. I always thought you were in love with Remus. Maybe you are. I had hoped, but that won't happen now." Sirius turned away and so didn't see Severus look at him wonderingly.
"You wanted me to kiss you? Remus? You hoped what?"
Sirius didn't turn around, but answered quietly. "I had hoped you kissed me because you wanted to. That you cared for me at least a little, felt even a fraction of what I feel for you. I wanted you to want me and for you to kiss me again. I'm sorry. I didn't know how much you really hated me. I know I should have known, after all I have done to you. I just let myself hope."
Severus didn't say anything, he just grabbed Sirius' arm and spun him about. Sirius didn't even have time to respond to this before Severus claimed his mouth in a searing kiss. Once the shock had worn off he responded to the prodding of Severus' tongue on his own and returned the kiss in full measure. As they both came up for air, Severus spoke quietly against Sirius' ear. "I don't hate you. I kissed you because I too have wanted it for so long. I feel a great deal for you, I care for you. I never wanted us to be enemies; I just couldn't stand thinking about you with Lupin."
Just then Harry and Lucius both walk in and see the two men in an intimate embrace. They stopped in shock and then Severus saw them standing there. He turned Sirius around to face them and as this happened Tom and Draco both entered as well. Draco's eyes grew big with surprise as he saw the two men he would have thought least likely to tolerate each other actually touching each other with care. Lucius smirked at them, his shock having worn off. Tom just smiled a patient smile and sat down at the table. Harry grabbed Draco and then everyone else sat down as well.
They all ate brunch, not talking much. When they were finished, they all gathered in the Study to discuss any issues which needed to be addressed before Harry and Draco leave. They are all a bit nervous about Dumbledore discovering their ruse. Harry of course wants to know if he should talk to Remus about all that has happened. Sirius tells him to test the waters and if it seems like Remus would be receptive, tell him. Tom says a long goodbye to Harry, telling him to use the portkey for any reason he needs. Sirius hugs Harry and tells him to practice his animagus work. Lucius kisses him deeply and tells him to visit soon, He will miss his angel.
Soon Severus, Harry, and Draco are ready to leave. They all take the portkey and return to Hogsmeade. Although it is very cold, the sun is out so their walk up to the school is not too terrible. They had timed it so that they arrived just as the other students were arriving. They were able to blend right in and no one was the wiser. Before Harry and Draco went their separate ways, they ducked off out of site to say goodbye.
Harry smiled, "Well, it is going to be really weird not being able to talk to you whenever I want. Do you want to meet tonight so that we can talk some?"
Draco shrugged, "Yeah, sounds good. I have some of my mother's dream books, maybe we can see if our dreams mean something finally. Um, Harry, would you mind maybe talking to Remus for me? Maybe find out if he hates me or not? I mean I know he doesn't like me or love me or anything like that, but if he at least doesn't hate me I can work with that."
Harry grinned, "Of course, I will stop by tonight and find out. Where should we meet to talk?"
"Well, come down to Sev's rooms. I will make sure it's ok. No one will bother us there."
"Ok, great. Thanks. See you tonight."
"Yeah, tonight." Draco replied as they both walked away.
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Harry met up with Ron and Hermione, but he really wasn't in the mood to chat with them. He just listened as they went on about Christmas at the Burrow. He couldn't tell them that he had his best holiday ever. He couldn't really tell them anything. He felt guilty; but he also knew that even without Dumbledore, they would never understand. He missed Lucius already. So he decided to zone out and think about his love. He hoped he would have a chance to go and see him soon. As it got later, Harry decided it was time to go and see Remus. He told his friends that he wanted to talk to him about something he read. Harry made his way to Remus' room. He knocked quietly, and Remus opened the door almost immediately.
"Harry? Come in. What did you need?"
Harry walked in and turned towards Remus, "I need to talk with you about some things. First though, I need you to keep an open mind. Don't dismiss what I say without giving me a chance."
Remus motioned for Harry to have a seat and sat down himself. "Harry, I would never dismiss what you have to say. You are extremely observant and if there is something you feel you need to tell me, not only will I keep it in confidence but I will give it due consideration. Oh, but before we do this, I got you something for Christmas. I didn't send it because I didn't want to upset you. I thought it would be best to give it to you in person." With that he handed Harry a small wrapped package. Harry ripped the paper off and inside was a figurine of a grim-like black dog. It was a wizarding figure so the dog moved, pacing and barking on occasion. It looked just like Padfoot.
Harry hugged Remus, "Thank you. This will actually make some of what I have to say easier. The best way to do this is to jump in. What if Voldemort didn't kill my parents? What if Dumbledore has been lying to everyone since the beginning?" Harry then proceeded to tell the whole tale. All about Tom and Ada and even Sirius. Remus listened with a growing look of horror on his face. He never interrupted or tried to deny Harry's words. Only when Harry was through, did he say anything.
"Thank you for trusting me to tell me. This is a lot to think about. I would like to see Sirius. I know you would never lie, but he is my best friend. I would like to see him for myself. I will help you in any way I can."
Harry smiled, "Thanks, Remus. Actually I have a question for you. How do you feel about Draco Malfoy?"
Remus smiled, but his mind was racing. 'He can't know! Why would he ask me about Draco? No one knows, it can't be that! It has to be something else. No one knows I have found my mate. They can't! I have gone to too much trouble to make sure that no one finds out. He is too young; he was just a child when we met. Also he is a Malfoy and Lucius' son. He could never love a dark creature especially not one as old as me. He wouldn't even know what it means to mate with a werewolf. Gods, why did Harry ask about him?' "Why do you ask?"
"Well, I told you about our friendship? We can't let anyone know, lest it get back to Dumbledore. I thought maybe we could come down here sometimes to talk."
Remus let out a relieved sigh, "Sure, Harry. That would be fine. You can come here whenever you need. Draco isn't really that bad." 'I just hope I can resist the temptation. Draco doesn't need someone like me. He deserves better.'
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*Draco POV*
I hope Harry gets here soon. I really need to know if Remus hates me. Wait, do I really want to know? I don't think I can handle it if he does. Gods, how can I be so pathetic! I'm a Malfoy! I don't need anyone. Well, ok so that's a lie! I need 'him'! I love a man who can never love me. He's a werewolf. The only way he would want me was if I was his mate, and if I was he would have already claimed me. Sure I know all about werewolves. When you fall in love with one when you're only thirteen, you tend to learn everything you can.
I know that they can have relationships with anyone, but they only mate with one person. That person is their rightful mate. Only then do they mate and claim someone. They can find this person by smell and some innate sense that only a werewolf can really understand. The thing is, both the wolf and human parts have to agree on the mate, or the bond won't work properly and the werewolf can go insane. So, yeah, I know I have no chance with him. I just really need for him to not hate me. Only in my deepest heart do I have other thoughts. Secret and scary thoughts. Hopeful and desperate thoughts. Please let him love me.
TBC
This chapter is dedicated to b.m. aka Darth Kätzchen on the HarryxLucius ML, because of angsty!Draco. Next chapter.Harry and Draco talk If you want the lemon email me!
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Thanks to my reviewers: Eowyn6 and Lenora,
Hope you all keep tuning in. I love you all!