Disclaimer: I do not own the Newsies. They are owned by Disney. *cries* I
wished I owned the Newsies, hehe. I also don't own any of the other
character's except Blue! Blue is the only thin' in this story that I own,
hehe.
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(A/N) This chapter might be disturbing. It's not very graphic but it involves violence and TONS of swearing. Please be aware of this before you read.
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Well guys, only 1 more chapter left. ONE! Can you believe that? It's kind of sad. My first fic will be completed. Thanks to everyone that has remained faithful in reviewing my fic. It means so much to me. Thanks so much guys. Every one of you are awesome and I love each and every one of you. Thanks for being faithful reviewers!
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Fantasy: LOL! Everyone at first thought they were really getting married but I added that in there for my own fun and because I wanted it to show how much Blink really cared about Blue and that he really did have plans for their future. Just to add to there relationship. Thanks so much for reviewing!
Kane: *cries* I'M SO SORRY KANE! I really love Blink! *slaps self* Stupid, stupid, stupid! You're such an idiot Blue! I tried to add something into every chapter that added up to that and in this chapter; you will see every part of the chapters that I added to add up to this. Thanks for reviewing!
Trigger: Wow, now I know that you read cuz you were talking about the wedding part and you never read that before, hehe. *eats trout* Mmm, kind of good. *slaps Trigger with trout bones* Thanks for reviewing sis!
Zippy: Hey! Give me my Blink back! *yanks Blink away from Zippy* You want Skittery, you can have him, I want Blink! *Blink slaps Blue* BLINK: JERK! Hehe. Thanks for reviewing!
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"Blink!" I heard Blue yelling from a distance. I immediately sat up because I didn't want her to see that I was crying. I wiped my tears as fast as I could, cleared my throat and didn't turn her way.
"Blink!" She was closer now.
"I don't want tah talk tah you Blue."
"Blink please listen tah me."
"There's nothin' dat you need tah say tah me Blue. I think you made your point very clear."
"Blink there is no point!" I finally got up right in her face.
"Then you explain tah me what da hell I saw back there!"
"Blink I did nothin' wrong! It was just a kiss! It's not like I wanted Skittery tah kiss me."
"Just a kiss? Well Blue a kiss explains a thousand words (A/N: That's the title of my 2nd chapter), so there's no need tah explain."
"Blink would you listen tah yourself! It wasn't my fault!"
"Oh then I guess it was my fault dat you kissed Skittery. I'm sorry dat I made you kiss Skittery."
"James Thomas would you just listen tah me!" I knew that whenever she used my real name, she was pissed, but did she expect me to sit and listen like a little boy? I think not.
"Fine, say what you have tah say, but I know dat it's a crock of shit."
"Blink what you saw back there was not planned! Skittery just came up tah me and kissed me. I swear tah you. I'm not makin' dis up. Why on earth would I want tah go and kiss Skittery?"
"You tell me. And what da hell was da whole 'I gave you your chance.' Explain dat one."
"Blink do you know why my friendship with Skittery ended in da first place? Do you? It was because of you! Zippy told me dat Skittery was in love with me so I confronted Skittery about it and he was goin' on about how I should be datin' him, dat we are meant tah be together, dat in da end he will be da one for me and a bunch of shit. I wasn't goin' tah take dat Blink. I cared for you tah much and I was willin' tah give up my friendship with da one person dat I held closest tah me because of you. Well da whole chance thin' was dat I was willin' tah let him be my friend again if he didn't try and pull anythin'. Well what does he do? He pulls me into a corner in an alleyway and tries tah kiss me, and dat's what you saw Blink. There was nothin' goin' on between us."
"You're so full of it Blue. Of course there was somethin' between you guys. You told me da first time we met! I saw it, everyone else saw it. You guys had a connection. For some reason you were just too stupid tah see it but when you did I'm sure you used it tah your advantage."
"What da hell are you talkin' about Blink?"
"You damn well know what I'm talkin' about. You wanted dat kiss just as much as he did. He kissed you and you enjoyed it for a slight second, then you realized what was goin' on and dat's when you pushed away. Dat's da truth isn't it Blue?" She just looked at me with hurt in her eyes. I knew dat it was true because she wouldn't say anything. She couldn't think of anything to say. "Dat's what I thought." I slowly turned away from her and began to walk away.
"Blink wait."
"Why Blue, why? Why did you waste all my time when you really wanted Skittery? All you had tah do was break up with me and you and Skittery could have been together. Why did you have tah go behind my back and cheat on me?"
"Blink I wasn't cheatin'! I never wanted Skittery! I wanted you! I always have and always will. Dis isn't my fault, you have tah understand dat."
"I see what you're doin'. You're just puttin' da blame on Skittery tah cover up for your mistake. You did it tah Spot; it makes perfect sense dat you'll do it now."
"I'm not placin' da blame on anyone Blink! Why are you bein' so stupid about dis? I wasn't cheatin' so you have nothin' tah worry about."
"Nothin' tah worry about? Blue you were kissin' my fuckin' best friend! Da only guy dat treats me normally. How would you like it if you saw me kissin' Zippy in an alleyway?"
"You wouldn't Blink."
"Dat's not da fuckin' point Blue! Da point is what you did was wrong! What are you goin' tah tell Zippy now? Huh? Oh Zippy, I'm so sorry! I was just makin' out with da guy dat you loved since you were little but you can have him because Skittery and I will never be together. I'm sure she is goin' tah buy dat."
"Why are you bein' such an ass hole Blink?"
"I have every right tah be an ass hole Blue! I just saw da one girl dat I loved more than anythin' in dis world kissin' da guy dat I envied since da day I got here! Do you know how dat makes me feel? Do you? No Blue you don't. It hurts more than you can imagine. Well you don't need tah worry about me anymore Blue because we are over! Now you can have Skittery all you want!" I turned to walk away from her.
"Blink, don't do dis! Dis isn't fair!"
"Isn't fair? If anythin' it isn't fair tah me. Blue I gave you fuckin' everythin'! I gave up my life for you! I gave up my family, my life, my dream, my first kiss, even my fuckin' virginity for you Blue! I gave you my heart, and soul, and dat's somethin' dat I can never get back. I will never be da same Blue. My whole life is messed up because of you! What da hell did you ever give up for me? Nothin'! I came here tah live with you Blue because I loved you. You never gave me anythin'. I wasn't your first kiss, you gave your fuckin' virginity tah Spot, and you gave Skittery your heart and don't you dare say dat you didn't, because you can't have a bond like dat without givin' away your heart Blue, you just can't."
"Blink I did so give you my heart! I gave you my heart and soul. Blink I didn't ask you tah fall in love with me! I didn't want you tah live here in da first place! I wanted you tah live da life dat you had! I didn't make you stay here, dat was your choice!"
"I was fuckin' thirteen years old Blue! I didn't know what I was doin'. Da point of da matter is dat I loved you Blue, I really did. Everythin' I ever did in my life was for you. Everythin' about my life was for you. What did you ever do for me?"
Blue was crying now and I couldn't help but cry as well. "Blink I'm sorry." She fell to her knees and cried in her hands.
"I'm sorry too. I hope you live a happy life here in 'Hattan because I'm fuckin' out of here tonight."
"BLINK!" She screamed.
"What! Blue I'm sick of sittin' here yellin' at you for dis. Don't you see dat I'm torn apart inside? I can't sit here and talk tah you about dis any longer! Da more I do da more upset I become." Tears started to fill my eyes.
"You know Blue I was goin' tah find you tah tell you what my decision was. You want tah know what my decision was. It was tah go back tah school and live out dat dream I had since I was little. But you want tah know da reason behind it? It wasn't me, it was you. Fuckin' you! Everythin' is about you Blue! I was goin' back tah school so I can actually become someone, tah give you a great life, a great house, and a great place for our kids. Yes kids Blue because I actually thought about our future. I wanted tah marry you, I wanted tah have kids with you and I wanted tah grow old with you! When I was thinkin' about all dis, somethin' in my mind was tellin' me what if somethin' bad happens dat you guys won't be together in da future? I thought I was paranoid but I wasn't because it was really tellin' me somethin'. Unlike you Becca I had dreams. I had our future planned out. If you don't believe how much I loved you then go back tah da lodgin' house, and check under my pillow. There you will find a ring dat I have been savin' up for you for four years Becca. It was a ring tah show my love tah you. It wasn't an engagement ring but a ring tah show my love. A promise ring. It was my promise tah you dat I will never hurt you, never cheat on you, and dat I will wait for you until it is our time tah get married. Even if we broke up I would still wait for you because dat was my promise tah you, but it's worthless now. I'm leavin' Becca and I'm never comin' back. I can't be in a place where I'm not wanted and I can't be in a place where da person dat I thought was my one true love, actually has feelings for someone else. So dis is my goodbye Becca. Thanks for takin' four years of my life dat I can never get back. Hope you don't break Skittery's heart da way you did mine." I turned and wasn't comin' back dis time.
"Blink wait! Please! BLINK!" I could hear her crying. God I hated it when she cried. Now I was crying more than I thought possible. I stopped and just stood there listening to her cries and screams. Why must it end like this God? Why would you do this to me? I fell to my knees and I could see the past four years flashing before my eyes. (A/N: These are flashbacks.)
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BANG! I was thrown to the ground. When I looked up, I saw something that took my breath away. There she was. The girl that was about to change my life forever. Her big piercing brown eyes gazed at me. Her long flowing dirty blonde hair tickled the side of my cheek. She smiled showing her white teeth. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Her beauty astounded me and took my breath away. She was lying flat on top of me, almost like something you would see in a dirty movie. You could feel the warmth of her body and strangely, I wanted to stay like that. Slowly I began to hear someone speaking. It was like a voice of an angel.
"Are ya okay?" said the voice.
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"Oh. Well you dropped your books." She bent down, picked up my books and handed them to me. "Here ya go. I'm sorry. I didn't mean tah delay you from buyin' your pape. Have a good day Mr..."
"Little. James Little."
"Well, James Little, sorry again." And with that, she turned and slowly began to walk out of my life.
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"It's Becca Carmady. But everyone calls me Blue Boxer. It's a nickname dat was given tah me by my cousin and some of 'er friends from 'Hattan."
"Well Becca, would ya like me tah call ya by your real name or your nickname?" I asked.
"Either. It doesn't matter. You can call me Blue for short if ya like." She said with a giggle.
"At least you have better nickname den me. Everyone calls me Kid Blink."
"Because of your patch?"
I just had to laugh. "Yes, 'cause of my patch. I use tah get made fun of, but I just don't let it bother me anymore."
"Why would kids make fun of you? I don't see anythin' wrong with it. I mean no one is poifect."
"You have da greatest outlook on life, Blue. It amazes me."
"Yeah well, it's good tah have a great outlook on life."
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"So is he like your boyfriend den?" I asked kind of worried.
"Who Skittery? No of course not. Skittery is more like a brother tah me. I love da guy tah death but I can't ever see myself datin' him. It would just be too weird I think. What about you, any special goil in your life?"
"You're jokin' right? Of course not. I actually nevah was wid a goil before. See I spend too much of my time either wid my family or by myself. Some of my friends at school have a goil and dat's dere entire life, and I don't want dat. I have huge plans for myself and I'm a very determined guy. I don't like things tah get in my way. But den dere are occasions where I'll let dat slide." I said smiling.
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"Heya Blink, um, I have a question for ya. If you're not datin' Blue, can I have her in da near future?" Mush said not realizing how loud he was.
"What da hell Mush!" Skittery said going over to Mush. "Da poor guy just got here and already you're hittin' on his girl. You have a girlfriend Mush, go be with her." Skittery pushed Mush away from Blink.
"I know but I just wanted tah know." Mush said going back to Cards.
"Sorry about him man, he's a bit of a horn dog." Skittery said.
"Dat's ok. I'm not datin' her anyways." I replied.
"Well you should be, she's a great girl." He than turned away.
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"So how did you guys meet?" Tag asked.
"Well I was on my way tah school one day and I accidentally ran into her. We ended up spendin' da whole day together doin' nothin' but talkin'. It was really amazin'. She's such a unique girl. And beautiful. She told me dat she was headin' off tah 'Hattan. Well it suddenly began tah rain and I wasn't about tah let her travel in dat kind of weather. So I convinced her tah spend da night at my house just tah rest up and wade out da storm." I said to Tag. She really was a nice girl.
"Dat was very sweet of you Blink."
"Wow, you actually remembered my name."
"Well you can't forget dat face. So where are you from?" She asked.
"I'm from Jersey City. It's not far from here. I promised Blue dat I would visit her sometime so dat's why I'm here."
"You like her don't you?" Tag asked. Girls were always so good at knowin' when a guy liked them.
"Oh gosh, I don't know." I slowly began to blush.
"Well you know you can always come tah me for advice. Blue really is a great girl and she deserves tah be with someone special. I don't know you dat well but from what I see, you're a really sweet guy. She needs someone special in her life, especially at a time like dis." What was Tag talking about? At a time like this?
"What do you mean at a time like dis?" I asked.
"She didn't tell you?" Tag said.
"No."
"Oh well than maybe I shouldn't have said anythin'. I'm sorry. I just thought she told you. I can't tell you. It's not my job too. I'm sure you'll find out soon enough." Specs finally came back and sat down beside Tag. The three of us continued to talk. Blue was over once again with Skittery. There was just something about Skittery that made me uneasy. Maybe it was because I was jealous but I just sensed that something was going on with them.
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"So tell me about dis Blink guy. Pretty sexy."
"I know he's sexy. Are you considerin' yourself gay?"
"No, I'm just statin' da obvious cuz you won't."
"Well tah be honest with you Skittery, he really is a great guy. You know I talked about you tah him before we even came here."
"Why are you always changin' da subject? Just admit it; Becca Carmady has a crush on eye patch kid."
"Don't call him dat please, and yes, I do have a crush on him. God Skittery, it is wrong dat I wanted tah kiss him da first time I met him. I've wanted tah kiss him for so long but I always feel like it's too soon, you know what I mean? I barely know da guy but I feel like I've known him my whole life, if dat makes sense. Plus I don't know if he even likes me or not."
"Give me a break Blue! Da guy is head over heels for you! Do you ever see da way he acts around you? He like bows down tah you. Why do you think he came all dis way? Do you think it's for nothin'? It's because he has feelings for you. Any guy would do it for you. You're a very beautiful girl, and any guy would be lucky tah have you. So if I was you, I would just go for it. It's never too soon when it comes tah love. You'll know when da time is right, trust me. Just have faith and believe and da time will come. Plus too you're just turnin' into Mush. Your hormones are actin' up and before you know it, you'll be da town whore."
"Skittery!" Blue punched him.
"I'm kiddin' ya Blue. You know I love ya."
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"Since you showed up Blue, things just have seemed so much brighter, happier and I for once actually felt somethin' for a girl. Ever since I laid eyes you on, you have been on my mind day and night. I just couldn't stop thinkin' about you. You're very special tah me Blue and my life isn't goin' tah be da same anymore." I placed my hand on the side of her face, feeling the softness of her skin. "Ever since I showed up here, everyone has been tellin' me dat you're a very special and great girl, and maybe they are right. I'll be such a fool if I left you slip right through my fingers." I started to lean into her. "You know how you said dat your first kiss is very special and should be shared with someone very special, I can't think of a better person than with you. So I'm askin' you on dis beautiful night, if I can have my first kiss with you?"
"You better." She said. I leaned in closer towards her, feeling her breath upon my face. Finally, the moment I was waiting for. My lips had finally met with hers. I pulled her closer. Her hands were now around my neck and mine were running through her hair. We stayed like that for a while, only stopping to take a breath. It was just perfect. The moon light and the bright shining stars. She was right, it was very special. My stomach was filling with butterflies and it seemed like everything around me was disappearing. We finally drew away and just looked at each other.
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"Blue you have completely changed my life. You're such an inspiration. You live on your own and you're doin' fine. I can't rely on my parents all my life. Comin' here was a complete culture shock. I didn't realize how much of my childhood dat I've missed. You and the other Newsies know how tah really live. You guys wake up every mornin', do your job and just live life! You don't waste it away in school like I do."
"No see Blink, dat's where you're wrong! You do not waste your live away in school. Do you see da way us Newsies live? Sure it may seem like we have tons of fun, but we are goin' tah grow up tah be a nobody. Unlike you Blink, you're goin' tah actually grow up tah become someone. You're goin' tah go tah school tah get a good job, and tah be able tah provide for da family dat you're goin' tah have someday. You have so much potential Blink, why are you throwin' it away!"
"Because of you! I like you Blue, you have NO idea. I've been a loner all my life, and really had no one. Dis is da first time I actually had someone, and you mean more tah me then you'll ever know. You actually made me feel human for a change. Blue, I don't know how tah explain it tah you because I can't put words tah how I feel! I just can't."
"I should go." Blue said beginning to walk away.
"Blue please understand what I'm talkin' about."
"Blink I can't! Dis is da lowest thin' you have ever done. You have a wonderful family back home and a great chance at a wonderful future, and you're goin' tah throw dat away all because of a girl. Dat makes no sense, especially me! You don't have da faintest idea of who I am! You know nothin' about me. I'm not da girl dat you think I am, and if you knew, you would have left a long time ago." She turned away.
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"Blink just leave me alone!"
"No Blue because it's not fair tah me!"
"Alright you two, you're comin' with me." Skittery grabbed both of us by the hands. Blue threw her book down on the bed and was literally dragged out by Skittery. Once outside, Blue gave Skittery a piece of her mind.
"Skittery, just forget it. I don't want tah talk about it."
"No Blue, you have too. Both of you GROW UP! For God sakes, don't you see it? You guys need tah woik dis out. You're perfect for each other and you both are afraid tah admit it. Blink you were wrong for not goin' home. You have a family dat I'm sure loves you very much, but I can't blame you for not wantin' tah leave Blue. Blue you were wrong for snappin' off tah Blink about somethin' he doesn't even know about! Give da poor guy a choice Blue. You have a heart in there and I know you do. You have tah tell him. It's not fair tah him dat you keep ignorin' him. Blue I know it's hard, but I can see it in your eyes. You love him and it would break your heart tah see him go." Skittery took both our hands and put them together. "You guys are meant tah be together and if you can't get over somethin' as small and stupid as dis, then you're just crazy. I hate tah see you guys like dis. It hurts me because I know what it feels like tah want somethin' so badly but is afraid tah go for it. You guys want dis but are afraid. So I want both of you tah woik dis out. Talk tah each other! And Blue, tell him!"
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"Long time no see there Blue. Maybe we should get together sometime soon tah check up on things, you know, like maybe you can come visit me and spend da night. We'll have lots of fun."
"Fuck you Spot." Blue said walking past him.
"What's da matter Blue? Are you jealous dat I have a new girl in my life? Because I'll tell you what, she's a lot better than you. She doesn't fight me, if you know what I mean." Spot stepped in front of her. Now he was up in her face.
"Why did you really come here Spot? Did you run out of girls tah fuck, huh? Is dat it? Is dis girl over here your last opinion?" She went to walk away but Spot grabbed her arm.
"Don't you ever talk about my girl like dat because I swear on your fuckin fatha's grave dat you'll be joinin' him in hell."
"Oh no! Did I hit a soft spot? You don't have tah worry, because for da remainder of da time dat you're here, you won't be seein' much of me." She walked over to me. "I'm goin' outside."
"But you still have your night clothes on." I said.
"I don't care; I just can't stay in here." She turned to walk out and I followed her.
"Dat's right; you go join her one eye." That's when Blue ran in, right at Spot. "You fuckin bastard! Don't you ever say dat again!" Spot backed up. That's when Skittery and I grabbed her before she hit Spot.
"Blue, it's not worth it. Remember what I told you." Skittery said still holding on to Blue. "Blink, take her out." I was still holding her as I pushed her outside.
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"Are you goin' tah be okay buddy?" I said wiping Tumbler's tears.
"Yes Brink. Fanks" He said hugging my neck. "I wuv you."
"I love you too Tumbler." He got down and headed towards the door.
"Brink?"
"Yeah Tumbler."
"Don't tell da guys I cried."
"I won't."
"Night!" He said waving. "Hi Bue." Tumbler said waving at Blue.
"Hi Tumbler." Blue said patting Tumbler's head. She looked back at me and crossed her arms. "I wuv you." She said with a smile.
"He's a cute kid." She just smiled.
"You like kids?"
"Yeah, kids are awesome. I wish Tumbler would never grow up. He's great." She walked over to me and wrapped her arms around my neck.
"You seem like you would be a great daddy. I think Tumbler sees you as his daddy."
"Well I must agree, I'm pretty good." I smiled.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Blue?" She looked up at me. "I'm very proud of you. You did somethin' dat I know was hard for you. You're a strong girl and I know dat your fatha would be proud of you."
"Sometimes I just want tah scream and start cryin', just tah fall upon my knees. I wish I could find a way tah lie about a home I'll never see. It's so hard because I really miss him. Every Christmas he used tah just give me dis little piece of wood with drawings on. I know it doesn't sound much but it meant so much tah me. I use tah sit on dis lap while we were outside on da steps and he would rock me back and forth as we watched da sun set. He was great guy and now he's gone."
"Blue, its okay. You're handlin' dis so well. Dis happens tah everyone. Even da best. Even those dat we call heroes have da right tah cry, scream, bleed and dream. You're just like everyone else, searchin' for dat dream. Because your fatha died, it has made you da person dat you are. It has made you so strong. Don't ever be afraid of fall on your knees and cry at times. Everyone has da right too."
"Blink will you teach me tah write?" She asked.
"Of course." I looked around but wasn't able to find anything. Then I remember dat I kept a journal. I grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil. "Here hold dis in your hand like dis." I grabbed her hand and guided it on the paper. "What would you like tah write?"
"Will you help me with da words?" She said looking at me.
"Yes. Here let's start it off like dis." I slowly helped her write the beginning of her poem. "See it's not dat hard." I said whispering into her ear. You could hear the rain outside and all we had was the little candlelight. She turned her head and looked at me. My head was only a few inches from hers, being as I was leaning over her.
"Blink? Thanks so much for bein' here with me. You don't have any idea how much it means tah me." When she said that a crack of thunder could be heard a mile away. She dropped the pencil and put her hands on my face. She slowly began to kiss me. I was not expecting this at all. Her hands slowly moved down my back and she was pulling me towards the floor. Before I knew it, I was lying on top of her, kind of like how it was when we first met accept switched. I felt myself becoming lost in her kiss. As the kiss ended, I looked at the twinkle in her piercing brown eyes. We both looked at each other breathing heavily. "Blink I don't want you to do somethin' your not ready for."
"I'm ready if you're willin' tah let me." She looked up at me with a huge smile. She shook her head yes. I leaned down and started kissing her softly. My stomach started to fill with more butterfly than I could possibly imagine. The moment that every guy wants in now here, the moment that I wanted since the day I laid eyes on Blue. I was about to see what life is like in Mush's world.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Blue is the most amazing person that I have encountered. She consumes my thoughts day in and day out; there is never a moment that passes by that I am not thinking about her in some way. It seemed like a dream. Blue and I kissed more passionately than ever now. Our kisses still soft and sweet. Her hands continued stroking my back with a gentleness that was unnerving. I could feel myself begin to flush with excitement.
After a while I finally pulled away and looked at the excitement in her face. She pulled my head close and whispered, "I love you." I just smiled not knowing what to say. I leaned down and whispered, "You know I love you." The moment we shared was one that I will cherish for the rest of my life. There's no greater feeling in the world than being with the one you love, and I was. It was everything that the guys told me about. How romantic, beautiful, special and exciting it was. It was something I was very proud of. I waited until I was ready and I'm glad I saved it for the one person that I truly wanted to be with.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Oh my God." Blue said covering up her mouth. "Dat came out wrong."
"How was it suppose tah come out?"
"Skittery dis is too much." Skittery grabbed her arm.
"You mean tah tell me you had feelin's for me too?"
"Yes Skittery." She went back to the pavement and her head fell into her hands. "I did have feelings for you. I was actually goin' tah do somethin' about them. I really, really liked you. Dat trip dat I met Blink, if I didn't meet him, I was goin' tah come tah 'Hattan and tell you how I felt, but I met Blink and everythin' dat I had planned came crashin' down. But I'm glad I did meet him, maybe it was fate, maybe it was suppose tah happen, I don't know. All I know is dat my feelings for him are very strong and they aren't goin' tah go away just because of a little crush I had in da past."
"But Blue, don't you think it would make more sense for you tah be with da one dat really knows you. I like Blink and he's a great guy, but he doesn't know anythin' about you. Sure he has been here for a while but he still doesn't know jack. Does he know dat you're scared of bein' alone; does he know dat your dream as a little girl was tah be a performer at Medda's? Does he know dat your favorite color is blue? Does he know dat your birthday is December 16 and your favorite season is summer? Does he know dat you hum without knowin' it and you bite your nails when you're nervous, or your eye twitches when you lie? Does he know any of dat?"
"No Skittery he doesn't but what does dat have tah do with anythin'? Who cares if he doesn't know what I'm afraid of, or what my favorite things are? Dat means nothin' Skittery. Like you told me, da only thin' dat matters is what's in your heart, and in my heart I feel dat Blink is da one. Blink will never hurt me. I'm doin' what my heart is tellin' me, and dat's tah be with Blink, not you."
"Do as you want tah Blue, but no matter what, I'm goin' tah always love you. I will wait for you until da day dat you realize dat we are meant tah be together. I will wait until da end of dis earth if I have too, but I'm doin' what my heart is tellin' me too, and dat's tah wait, because I know you Blue and I know dat you will eventually get tired of Blink and you'll find out who you really are suppose tah be with. I don't care dat you aren't goin' tah be waitin' for me, but I'll be waitin' for you Blue."
"Skittery you have tah move on! I don't want tah be with you! I love Blink and dat's it. I'm sorry. You're my best friend and will always be my best friend. We aren't meant tah be lovers, we are meant tah be best friends, and dat's all I'll ever let us be."
"You won't ever give me a chance?" Skittery looked like he was about to cry.
"Skittery there will never be a chance because Blink and I will be together forever."
"Fine." Skittery's head fell and he turned away and headed towards Central Park.
"Skittery!" He turned around and Blue could see tears in his eyes. "I'm sorry."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Skittery, dat's enough. We can't do dis anymore!" That voice sounded so familiar. Was it Zippy? No, it was too high for Zippy. Where have I heard that voice before?
"What are you talkin' about? Dis is da way it's suppose tah be." Skittery was saying.
"Skittery I can't do dis! I gave you your chance but it's done now. I can't do dis!" She gave him a chance? Why does this all sound so familiar? I continued to watch to see if I could get a glimpse of this girl. I saw Skittery go and kiss her. About a few seconds later the girl pushed Skittery away and finally came out from behind him. My jaw dropped almost down to the ground. My eyes felt like they popped out of my head. I feel like someone just knocked the wind out of me. This isn't happening. It can't be true! I felt my legs and arms turn into jelly. It was almost as if someone just reached in and pulled my heart out. I felt like I was dying, and I wish I did. This hurt me more than seeing my sister with Spot. This was the worst pain ever. My worst nightmare had come true. The thing that I suspected all along was true. There was something going on. All those thoughts in my head weren't just random thoughts, they were true. Standing in the alleyway was Skittery and Blue.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(A/N: Blink's flashback are done now.) Why didn't I see it before? I kept asking myself. It was so obvious. It was right in front of my face this whole time. I felt a hand on my shoulder.
"Blink?" Blue said crying.
"Get your fuckin' hands off me Blue!" I said swatting her hand away from me. I was crying harder now than before. "You bitch! Maybe Spot was right. You're nothin' but a whore Blue. You always were. You don't know how tah love because you don't know what love is! You never loved anyone."
"Blink how can you say dat?"
"Because it's true. You never loved me. You can't love someone if you don't know what love is. You know what, you deserved everythin' you got in life! You're nothin' but a fuckin' bitch!" I was out of control now. I raised my hand and slapped her. I couldn't stop myself. I was punching and kicking her.
"Blink stop it!" I ignored her cries and continued. Finally I stopped and looked down at her. Her face was bleeding and her arms were bruised. What the fuck was that all about? I never saw a side of me like that before. I hurt the one girl that I said I would never hurt. (A/N: Flashback.)
"You have my word dat I will never hurt you, no matter what happens. I will never do anythin' tah you like Spot did." (A/N: Okay flashbacks are done.) My God! I broke my promise. I promised her that I would never hurt her and I did. I just stared down at her. She wouldn't even look up at me now. I covered my mouth and just cried.
"My God Blue I'm so sorry! I didn't mean tah hurt you. I don't know what came over me." She was shaking.
"I've got tah go." I turned and ran back to the lodging house. She didn't even scream for me to stop now. What the hell had gotten into me? Why did I act like that? She brainwashed me. Everything about me was consumed with her. It had driven me to insanity.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Back at the lodging house everyone was doing there own thing. I stormed in the lodging house and ran over to my stuff. I started throwing everything into my bag.
"Blink, are you okay?" I heard Racetrack say. I didn't stop what I was doing. I just continued.
"Dude have you been cryin'?" Jack said following Race. I threw my bag on my back and ran out of the lodging house.
"Blink!" I heard all the guys yell. As I ran out of the door I ran right into Kane.
"James where are you goin'?" Kane asked.
"I'm goin' home Kane. But I need tah do somethin' first. I'll see you when I get home." I just continued to walk.
"James have you been cryin'?" I heard her yell. I just ran as fast as I could to Central Park to say goodbye to Blue. As I approached I saw Skittery hugging Blue, and kissing her on the forehead.
"What da fuck in goin' on here?" I said under my breath. I ran over to Skittery and Blue. I dropped my bag and pushed Skittery over. I started punching him and hitting him. (A/N: I know you guys are probably wondering why isn't anyone stopping them if they are in a public place like Central Park? Well I don't know, just got with it.)
"Blink stop it!" Blue ran up and tried to get me off Skittery. I just pushed her back. "Stop it!" Skittery finally got away and was just staring at me.
"What da fuck is your problem man?" Skittery asked.
"Dat's my fuckin' girl and you're all over her!" I said charging towards Skittery again.
"Blink stop it! Now!" She ran in front of me. "Skittery was just tryin' tah make me feel better."
"Dis is just proves what I was sayin' Blue, you are a whore."
"Don't ever call her dat you fuckin' bastard!"
"It's true Skittery, she just brainwashed you like everyone else. She wants both of us but can't make up her mind. So who do you want Blue? You can't have both. Here is your chance, which guy do you want?" Skittery and I both just looked at Blue.
"I don't know." She said crying.
"Dat's what I thought." I said going over to my bag. "Well I can solve your problem right now." I pulled a gun out of my bag.
"Blink what da fuck are you doin'?" She asked eyeing the gun.
"I'm makin' your decision easier for ya Blue. We will end dis problem here and now. Which guy do you want Blue? You can't love us both. If you say Skittery, then I'll blow my brains out and you can have Skittery, or you can have me and I'll kill Skittery." He aimed the gun at Skittery.
"Blink stop it! I don't know okay!"
"Come on Blue, who do you want?"
She was crying now. "Skittery." I just looked over at her. Was she serious?
"I want Skittery Blink. I want him alive! I love dat boy tah death but my love for him isn't da love dat I have for you! I want you too Blink but my want for you is different. I want Skittery alive but dat's it. He's my best friend but you're da one I love Blink. I want my future with you! I want my kids with you! I don't want any of dat with Skittery. I just want da friendship dat we share."
"So you want me huh? Is dat what you sayin'?" She stood up now continuing to cry.
"Yes. I always did."
"Fine then, but one of us has tah go. It was good knowin' you Skittery." I pulled the clutch back and aimed at Skittery.
"Blink no!" I heard Blue yell. That was the last thing dat I heard before I pulled the trigger. BANG! The gun had gone off. With my arms outstretched I just stood there. I couldn't believe my eyes! I just shot the gun. Why the hell did I do that? I started to tremble as I looked down at the ground. Laying on the ground, soaked in blood was Blue.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(A/N) This chapter might be disturbing. It's not very graphic but it involves violence and TONS of swearing. Please be aware of this before you read.
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Well guys, only 1 more chapter left. ONE! Can you believe that? It's kind of sad. My first fic will be completed. Thanks to everyone that has remained faithful in reviewing my fic. It means so much to me. Thanks so much guys. Every one of you are awesome and I love each and every one of you. Thanks for being faithful reviewers!
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Fantasy: LOL! Everyone at first thought they were really getting married but I added that in there for my own fun and because I wanted it to show how much Blink really cared about Blue and that he really did have plans for their future. Just to add to there relationship. Thanks so much for reviewing!
Kane: *cries* I'M SO SORRY KANE! I really love Blink! *slaps self* Stupid, stupid, stupid! You're such an idiot Blue! I tried to add something into every chapter that added up to that and in this chapter; you will see every part of the chapters that I added to add up to this. Thanks for reviewing!
Trigger: Wow, now I know that you read cuz you were talking about the wedding part and you never read that before, hehe. *eats trout* Mmm, kind of good. *slaps Trigger with trout bones* Thanks for reviewing sis!
Zippy: Hey! Give me my Blink back! *yanks Blink away from Zippy* You want Skittery, you can have him, I want Blink! *Blink slaps Blue* BLINK: JERK! Hehe. Thanks for reviewing!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Blink!" I heard Blue yelling from a distance. I immediately sat up because I didn't want her to see that I was crying. I wiped my tears as fast as I could, cleared my throat and didn't turn her way.
"Blink!" She was closer now.
"I don't want tah talk tah you Blue."
"Blink please listen tah me."
"There's nothin' dat you need tah say tah me Blue. I think you made your point very clear."
"Blink there is no point!" I finally got up right in her face.
"Then you explain tah me what da hell I saw back there!"
"Blink I did nothin' wrong! It was just a kiss! It's not like I wanted Skittery tah kiss me."
"Just a kiss? Well Blue a kiss explains a thousand words (A/N: That's the title of my 2nd chapter), so there's no need tah explain."
"Blink would you listen tah yourself! It wasn't my fault!"
"Oh then I guess it was my fault dat you kissed Skittery. I'm sorry dat I made you kiss Skittery."
"James Thomas would you just listen tah me!" I knew that whenever she used my real name, she was pissed, but did she expect me to sit and listen like a little boy? I think not.
"Fine, say what you have tah say, but I know dat it's a crock of shit."
"Blink what you saw back there was not planned! Skittery just came up tah me and kissed me. I swear tah you. I'm not makin' dis up. Why on earth would I want tah go and kiss Skittery?"
"You tell me. And what da hell was da whole 'I gave you your chance.' Explain dat one."
"Blink do you know why my friendship with Skittery ended in da first place? Do you? It was because of you! Zippy told me dat Skittery was in love with me so I confronted Skittery about it and he was goin' on about how I should be datin' him, dat we are meant tah be together, dat in da end he will be da one for me and a bunch of shit. I wasn't goin' tah take dat Blink. I cared for you tah much and I was willin' tah give up my friendship with da one person dat I held closest tah me because of you. Well da whole chance thin' was dat I was willin' tah let him be my friend again if he didn't try and pull anythin'. Well what does he do? He pulls me into a corner in an alleyway and tries tah kiss me, and dat's what you saw Blink. There was nothin' goin' on between us."
"You're so full of it Blue. Of course there was somethin' between you guys. You told me da first time we met! I saw it, everyone else saw it. You guys had a connection. For some reason you were just too stupid tah see it but when you did I'm sure you used it tah your advantage."
"What da hell are you talkin' about Blink?"
"You damn well know what I'm talkin' about. You wanted dat kiss just as much as he did. He kissed you and you enjoyed it for a slight second, then you realized what was goin' on and dat's when you pushed away. Dat's da truth isn't it Blue?" She just looked at me with hurt in her eyes. I knew dat it was true because she wouldn't say anything. She couldn't think of anything to say. "Dat's what I thought." I slowly turned away from her and began to walk away.
"Blink wait."
"Why Blue, why? Why did you waste all my time when you really wanted Skittery? All you had tah do was break up with me and you and Skittery could have been together. Why did you have tah go behind my back and cheat on me?"
"Blink I wasn't cheatin'! I never wanted Skittery! I wanted you! I always have and always will. Dis isn't my fault, you have tah understand dat."
"I see what you're doin'. You're just puttin' da blame on Skittery tah cover up for your mistake. You did it tah Spot; it makes perfect sense dat you'll do it now."
"I'm not placin' da blame on anyone Blink! Why are you bein' so stupid about dis? I wasn't cheatin' so you have nothin' tah worry about."
"Nothin' tah worry about? Blue you were kissin' my fuckin' best friend! Da only guy dat treats me normally. How would you like it if you saw me kissin' Zippy in an alleyway?"
"You wouldn't Blink."
"Dat's not da fuckin' point Blue! Da point is what you did was wrong! What are you goin' tah tell Zippy now? Huh? Oh Zippy, I'm so sorry! I was just makin' out with da guy dat you loved since you were little but you can have him because Skittery and I will never be together. I'm sure she is goin' tah buy dat."
"Why are you bein' such an ass hole Blink?"
"I have every right tah be an ass hole Blue! I just saw da one girl dat I loved more than anythin' in dis world kissin' da guy dat I envied since da day I got here! Do you know how dat makes me feel? Do you? No Blue you don't. It hurts more than you can imagine. Well you don't need tah worry about me anymore Blue because we are over! Now you can have Skittery all you want!" I turned to walk away from her.
"Blink, don't do dis! Dis isn't fair!"
"Isn't fair? If anythin' it isn't fair tah me. Blue I gave you fuckin' everythin'! I gave up my life for you! I gave up my family, my life, my dream, my first kiss, even my fuckin' virginity for you Blue! I gave you my heart, and soul, and dat's somethin' dat I can never get back. I will never be da same Blue. My whole life is messed up because of you! What da hell did you ever give up for me? Nothin'! I came here tah live with you Blue because I loved you. You never gave me anythin'. I wasn't your first kiss, you gave your fuckin' virginity tah Spot, and you gave Skittery your heart and don't you dare say dat you didn't, because you can't have a bond like dat without givin' away your heart Blue, you just can't."
"Blink I did so give you my heart! I gave you my heart and soul. Blink I didn't ask you tah fall in love with me! I didn't want you tah live here in da first place! I wanted you tah live da life dat you had! I didn't make you stay here, dat was your choice!"
"I was fuckin' thirteen years old Blue! I didn't know what I was doin'. Da point of da matter is dat I loved you Blue, I really did. Everythin' I ever did in my life was for you. Everythin' about my life was for you. What did you ever do for me?"
Blue was crying now and I couldn't help but cry as well. "Blink I'm sorry." She fell to her knees and cried in her hands.
"I'm sorry too. I hope you live a happy life here in 'Hattan because I'm fuckin' out of here tonight."
"BLINK!" She screamed.
"What! Blue I'm sick of sittin' here yellin' at you for dis. Don't you see dat I'm torn apart inside? I can't sit here and talk tah you about dis any longer! Da more I do da more upset I become." Tears started to fill my eyes.
"You know Blue I was goin' tah find you tah tell you what my decision was. You want tah know what my decision was. It was tah go back tah school and live out dat dream I had since I was little. But you want tah know da reason behind it? It wasn't me, it was you. Fuckin' you! Everythin' is about you Blue! I was goin' back tah school so I can actually become someone, tah give you a great life, a great house, and a great place for our kids. Yes kids Blue because I actually thought about our future. I wanted tah marry you, I wanted tah have kids with you and I wanted tah grow old with you! When I was thinkin' about all dis, somethin' in my mind was tellin' me what if somethin' bad happens dat you guys won't be together in da future? I thought I was paranoid but I wasn't because it was really tellin' me somethin'. Unlike you Becca I had dreams. I had our future planned out. If you don't believe how much I loved you then go back tah da lodgin' house, and check under my pillow. There you will find a ring dat I have been savin' up for you for four years Becca. It was a ring tah show my love tah you. It wasn't an engagement ring but a ring tah show my love. A promise ring. It was my promise tah you dat I will never hurt you, never cheat on you, and dat I will wait for you until it is our time tah get married. Even if we broke up I would still wait for you because dat was my promise tah you, but it's worthless now. I'm leavin' Becca and I'm never comin' back. I can't be in a place where I'm not wanted and I can't be in a place where da person dat I thought was my one true love, actually has feelings for someone else. So dis is my goodbye Becca. Thanks for takin' four years of my life dat I can never get back. Hope you don't break Skittery's heart da way you did mine." I turned and wasn't comin' back dis time.
"Blink wait! Please! BLINK!" I could hear her crying. God I hated it when she cried. Now I was crying more than I thought possible. I stopped and just stood there listening to her cries and screams. Why must it end like this God? Why would you do this to me? I fell to my knees and I could see the past four years flashing before my eyes. (A/N: These are flashbacks.)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
BANG! I was thrown to the ground. When I looked up, I saw something that took my breath away. There she was. The girl that was about to change my life forever. Her big piercing brown eyes gazed at me. Her long flowing dirty blonde hair tickled the side of my cheek. She smiled showing her white teeth. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Her beauty astounded me and took my breath away. She was lying flat on top of me, almost like something you would see in a dirty movie. You could feel the warmth of her body and strangely, I wanted to stay like that. Slowly I began to hear someone speaking. It was like a voice of an angel.
"Are ya okay?" said the voice.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Oh. Well you dropped your books." She bent down, picked up my books and handed them to me. "Here ya go. I'm sorry. I didn't mean tah delay you from buyin' your pape. Have a good day Mr..."
"Little. James Little."
"Well, James Little, sorry again." And with that, she turned and slowly began to walk out of my life.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"It's Becca Carmady. But everyone calls me Blue Boxer. It's a nickname dat was given tah me by my cousin and some of 'er friends from 'Hattan."
"Well Becca, would ya like me tah call ya by your real name or your nickname?" I asked.
"Either. It doesn't matter. You can call me Blue for short if ya like." She said with a giggle.
"At least you have better nickname den me. Everyone calls me Kid Blink."
"Because of your patch?"
I just had to laugh. "Yes, 'cause of my patch. I use tah get made fun of, but I just don't let it bother me anymore."
"Why would kids make fun of you? I don't see anythin' wrong with it. I mean no one is poifect."
"You have da greatest outlook on life, Blue. It amazes me."
"Yeah well, it's good tah have a great outlook on life."
~*~*~*~*~*~
"So is he like your boyfriend den?" I asked kind of worried.
"Who Skittery? No of course not. Skittery is more like a brother tah me. I love da guy tah death but I can't ever see myself datin' him. It would just be too weird I think. What about you, any special goil in your life?"
"You're jokin' right? Of course not. I actually nevah was wid a goil before. See I spend too much of my time either wid my family or by myself. Some of my friends at school have a goil and dat's dere entire life, and I don't want dat. I have huge plans for myself and I'm a very determined guy. I don't like things tah get in my way. But den dere are occasions where I'll let dat slide." I said smiling.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Heya Blink, um, I have a question for ya. If you're not datin' Blue, can I have her in da near future?" Mush said not realizing how loud he was.
"What da hell Mush!" Skittery said going over to Mush. "Da poor guy just got here and already you're hittin' on his girl. You have a girlfriend Mush, go be with her." Skittery pushed Mush away from Blink.
"I know but I just wanted tah know." Mush said going back to Cards.
"Sorry about him man, he's a bit of a horn dog." Skittery said.
"Dat's ok. I'm not datin' her anyways." I replied.
"Well you should be, she's a great girl." He than turned away.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"So how did you guys meet?" Tag asked.
"Well I was on my way tah school one day and I accidentally ran into her. We ended up spendin' da whole day together doin' nothin' but talkin'. It was really amazin'. She's such a unique girl. And beautiful. She told me dat she was headin' off tah 'Hattan. Well it suddenly began tah rain and I wasn't about tah let her travel in dat kind of weather. So I convinced her tah spend da night at my house just tah rest up and wade out da storm." I said to Tag. She really was a nice girl.
"Dat was very sweet of you Blink."
"Wow, you actually remembered my name."
"Well you can't forget dat face. So where are you from?" She asked.
"I'm from Jersey City. It's not far from here. I promised Blue dat I would visit her sometime so dat's why I'm here."
"You like her don't you?" Tag asked. Girls were always so good at knowin' when a guy liked them.
"Oh gosh, I don't know." I slowly began to blush.
"Well you know you can always come tah me for advice. Blue really is a great girl and she deserves tah be with someone special. I don't know you dat well but from what I see, you're a really sweet guy. She needs someone special in her life, especially at a time like dis." What was Tag talking about? At a time like this?
"What do you mean at a time like dis?" I asked.
"She didn't tell you?" Tag said.
"No."
"Oh well than maybe I shouldn't have said anythin'. I'm sorry. I just thought she told you. I can't tell you. It's not my job too. I'm sure you'll find out soon enough." Specs finally came back and sat down beside Tag. The three of us continued to talk. Blue was over once again with Skittery. There was just something about Skittery that made me uneasy. Maybe it was because I was jealous but I just sensed that something was going on with them.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"So tell me about dis Blink guy. Pretty sexy."
"I know he's sexy. Are you considerin' yourself gay?"
"No, I'm just statin' da obvious cuz you won't."
"Well tah be honest with you Skittery, he really is a great guy. You know I talked about you tah him before we even came here."
"Why are you always changin' da subject? Just admit it; Becca Carmady has a crush on eye patch kid."
"Don't call him dat please, and yes, I do have a crush on him. God Skittery, it is wrong dat I wanted tah kiss him da first time I met him. I've wanted tah kiss him for so long but I always feel like it's too soon, you know what I mean? I barely know da guy but I feel like I've known him my whole life, if dat makes sense. Plus I don't know if he even likes me or not."
"Give me a break Blue! Da guy is head over heels for you! Do you ever see da way he acts around you? He like bows down tah you. Why do you think he came all dis way? Do you think it's for nothin'? It's because he has feelings for you. Any guy would do it for you. You're a very beautiful girl, and any guy would be lucky tah have you. So if I was you, I would just go for it. It's never too soon when it comes tah love. You'll know when da time is right, trust me. Just have faith and believe and da time will come. Plus too you're just turnin' into Mush. Your hormones are actin' up and before you know it, you'll be da town whore."
"Skittery!" Blue punched him.
"I'm kiddin' ya Blue. You know I love ya."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Since you showed up Blue, things just have seemed so much brighter, happier and I for once actually felt somethin' for a girl. Ever since I laid eyes you on, you have been on my mind day and night. I just couldn't stop thinkin' about you. You're very special tah me Blue and my life isn't goin' tah be da same anymore." I placed my hand on the side of her face, feeling the softness of her skin. "Ever since I showed up here, everyone has been tellin' me dat you're a very special and great girl, and maybe they are right. I'll be such a fool if I left you slip right through my fingers." I started to lean into her. "You know how you said dat your first kiss is very special and should be shared with someone very special, I can't think of a better person than with you. So I'm askin' you on dis beautiful night, if I can have my first kiss with you?"
"You better." She said. I leaned in closer towards her, feeling her breath upon my face. Finally, the moment I was waiting for. My lips had finally met with hers. I pulled her closer. Her hands were now around my neck and mine were running through her hair. We stayed like that for a while, only stopping to take a breath. It was just perfect. The moon light and the bright shining stars. She was right, it was very special. My stomach was filling with butterflies and it seemed like everything around me was disappearing. We finally drew away and just looked at each other.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Blue you have completely changed my life. You're such an inspiration. You live on your own and you're doin' fine. I can't rely on my parents all my life. Comin' here was a complete culture shock. I didn't realize how much of my childhood dat I've missed. You and the other Newsies know how tah really live. You guys wake up every mornin', do your job and just live life! You don't waste it away in school like I do."
"No see Blink, dat's where you're wrong! You do not waste your live away in school. Do you see da way us Newsies live? Sure it may seem like we have tons of fun, but we are goin' tah grow up tah be a nobody. Unlike you Blink, you're goin' tah actually grow up tah become someone. You're goin' tah go tah school tah get a good job, and tah be able tah provide for da family dat you're goin' tah have someday. You have so much potential Blink, why are you throwin' it away!"
"Because of you! I like you Blue, you have NO idea. I've been a loner all my life, and really had no one. Dis is da first time I actually had someone, and you mean more tah me then you'll ever know. You actually made me feel human for a change. Blue, I don't know how tah explain it tah you because I can't put words tah how I feel! I just can't."
"I should go." Blue said beginning to walk away.
"Blue please understand what I'm talkin' about."
"Blink I can't! Dis is da lowest thin' you have ever done. You have a wonderful family back home and a great chance at a wonderful future, and you're goin' tah throw dat away all because of a girl. Dat makes no sense, especially me! You don't have da faintest idea of who I am! You know nothin' about me. I'm not da girl dat you think I am, and if you knew, you would have left a long time ago." She turned away.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Blink just leave me alone!"
"No Blue because it's not fair tah me!"
"Alright you two, you're comin' with me." Skittery grabbed both of us by the hands. Blue threw her book down on the bed and was literally dragged out by Skittery. Once outside, Blue gave Skittery a piece of her mind.
"Skittery, just forget it. I don't want tah talk about it."
"No Blue, you have too. Both of you GROW UP! For God sakes, don't you see it? You guys need tah woik dis out. You're perfect for each other and you both are afraid tah admit it. Blink you were wrong for not goin' home. You have a family dat I'm sure loves you very much, but I can't blame you for not wantin' tah leave Blue. Blue you were wrong for snappin' off tah Blink about somethin' he doesn't even know about! Give da poor guy a choice Blue. You have a heart in there and I know you do. You have tah tell him. It's not fair tah him dat you keep ignorin' him. Blue I know it's hard, but I can see it in your eyes. You love him and it would break your heart tah see him go." Skittery took both our hands and put them together. "You guys are meant tah be together and if you can't get over somethin' as small and stupid as dis, then you're just crazy. I hate tah see you guys like dis. It hurts me because I know what it feels like tah want somethin' so badly but is afraid tah go for it. You guys want dis but are afraid. So I want both of you tah woik dis out. Talk tah each other! And Blue, tell him!"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Long time no see there Blue. Maybe we should get together sometime soon tah check up on things, you know, like maybe you can come visit me and spend da night. We'll have lots of fun."
"Fuck you Spot." Blue said walking past him.
"What's da matter Blue? Are you jealous dat I have a new girl in my life? Because I'll tell you what, she's a lot better than you. She doesn't fight me, if you know what I mean." Spot stepped in front of her. Now he was up in her face.
"Why did you really come here Spot? Did you run out of girls tah fuck, huh? Is dat it? Is dis girl over here your last opinion?" She went to walk away but Spot grabbed her arm.
"Don't you ever talk about my girl like dat because I swear on your fuckin fatha's grave dat you'll be joinin' him in hell."
"Oh no! Did I hit a soft spot? You don't have tah worry, because for da remainder of da time dat you're here, you won't be seein' much of me." She walked over to me. "I'm goin' outside."
"But you still have your night clothes on." I said.
"I don't care; I just can't stay in here." She turned to walk out and I followed her.
"Dat's right; you go join her one eye." That's when Blue ran in, right at Spot. "You fuckin bastard! Don't you ever say dat again!" Spot backed up. That's when Skittery and I grabbed her before she hit Spot.
"Blue, it's not worth it. Remember what I told you." Skittery said still holding on to Blue. "Blink, take her out." I was still holding her as I pushed her outside.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Are you goin' tah be okay buddy?" I said wiping Tumbler's tears.
"Yes Brink. Fanks" He said hugging my neck. "I wuv you."
"I love you too Tumbler." He got down and headed towards the door.
"Brink?"
"Yeah Tumbler."
"Don't tell da guys I cried."
"I won't."
"Night!" He said waving. "Hi Bue." Tumbler said waving at Blue.
"Hi Tumbler." Blue said patting Tumbler's head. She looked back at me and crossed her arms. "I wuv you." She said with a smile.
"He's a cute kid." She just smiled.
"You like kids?"
"Yeah, kids are awesome. I wish Tumbler would never grow up. He's great." She walked over to me and wrapped her arms around my neck.
"You seem like you would be a great daddy. I think Tumbler sees you as his daddy."
"Well I must agree, I'm pretty good." I smiled.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Blue?" She looked up at me. "I'm very proud of you. You did somethin' dat I know was hard for you. You're a strong girl and I know dat your fatha would be proud of you."
"Sometimes I just want tah scream and start cryin', just tah fall upon my knees. I wish I could find a way tah lie about a home I'll never see. It's so hard because I really miss him. Every Christmas he used tah just give me dis little piece of wood with drawings on. I know it doesn't sound much but it meant so much tah me. I use tah sit on dis lap while we were outside on da steps and he would rock me back and forth as we watched da sun set. He was great guy and now he's gone."
"Blue, its okay. You're handlin' dis so well. Dis happens tah everyone. Even da best. Even those dat we call heroes have da right tah cry, scream, bleed and dream. You're just like everyone else, searchin' for dat dream. Because your fatha died, it has made you da person dat you are. It has made you so strong. Don't ever be afraid of fall on your knees and cry at times. Everyone has da right too."
"Blink will you teach me tah write?" She asked.
"Of course." I looked around but wasn't able to find anything. Then I remember dat I kept a journal. I grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil. "Here hold dis in your hand like dis." I grabbed her hand and guided it on the paper. "What would you like tah write?"
"Will you help me with da words?" She said looking at me.
"Yes. Here let's start it off like dis." I slowly helped her write the beginning of her poem. "See it's not dat hard." I said whispering into her ear. You could hear the rain outside and all we had was the little candlelight. She turned her head and looked at me. My head was only a few inches from hers, being as I was leaning over her.
"Blink? Thanks so much for bein' here with me. You don't have any idea how much it means tah me." When she said that a crack of thunder could be heard a mile away. She dropped the pencil and put her hands on my face. She slowly began to kiss me. I was not expecting this at all. Her hands slowly moved down my back and she was pulling me towards the floor. Before I knew it, I was lying on top of her, kind of like how it was when we first met accept switched. I felt myself becoming lost in her kiss. As the kiss ended, I looked at the twinkle in her piercing brown eyes. We both looked at each other breathing heavily. "Blink I don't want you to do somethin' your not ready for."
"I'm ready if you're willin' tah let me." She looked up at me with a huge smile. She shook her head yes. I leaned down and started kissing her softly. My stomach started to fill with more butterfly than I could possibly imagine. The moment that every guy wants in now here, the moment that I wanted since the day I laid eyes on Blue. I was about to see what life is like in Mush's world.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Blue is the most amazing person that I have encountered. She consumes my thoughts day in and day out; there is never a moment that passes by that I am not thinking about her in some way. It seemed like a dream. Blue and I kissed more passionately than ever now. Our kisses still soft and sweet. Her hands continued stroking my back with a gentleness that was unnerving. I could feel myself begin to flush with excitement.
After a while I finally pulled away and looked at the excitement in her face. She pulled my head close and whispered, "I love you." I just smiled not knowing what to say. I leaned down and whispered, "You know I love you." The moment we shared was one that I will cherish for the rest of my life. There's no greater feeling in the world than being with the one you love, and I was. It was everything that the guys told me about. How romantic, beautiful, special and exciting it was. It was something I was very proud of. I waited until I was ready and I'm glad I saved it for the one person that I truly wanted to be with.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Oh my God." Blue said covering up her mouth. "Dat came out wrong."
"How was it suppose tah come out?"
"Skittery dis is too much." Skittery grabbed her arm.
"You mean tah tell me you had feelin's for me too?"
"Yes Skittery." She went back to the pavement and her head fell into her hands. "I did have feelings for you. I was actually goin' tah do somethin' about them. I really, really liked you. Dat trip dat I met Blink, if I didn't meet him, I was goin' tah come tah 'Hattan and tell you how I felt, but I met Blink and everythin' dat I had planned came crashin' down. But I'm glad I did meet him, maybe it was fate, maybe it was suppose tah happen, I don't know. All I know is dat my feelings for him are very strong and they aren't goin' tah go away just because of a little crush I had in da past."
"But Blue, don't you think it would make more sense for you tah be with da one dat really knows you. I like Blink and he's a great guy, but he doesn't know anythin' about you. Sure he has been here for a while but he still doesn't know jack. Does he know dat you're scared of bein' alone; does he know dat your dream as a little girl was tah be a performer at Medda's? Does he know dat your favorite color is blue? Does he know dat your birthday is December 16 and your favorite season is summer? Does he know dat you hum without knowin' it and you bite your nails when you're nervous, or your eye twitches when you lie? Does he know any of dat?"
"No Skittery he doesn't but what does dat have tah do with anythin'? Who cares if he doesn't know what I'm afraid of, or what my favorite things are? Dat means nothin' Skittery. Like you told me, da only thin' dat matters is what's in your heart, and in my heart I feel dat Blink is da one. Blink will never hurt me. I'm doin' what my heart is tellin' me, and dat's tah be with Blink, not you."
"Do as you want tah Blue, but no matter what, I'm goin' tah always love you. I will wait for you until da day dat you realize dat we are meant tah be together. I will wait until da end of dis earth if I have too, but I'm doin' what my heart is tellin' me too, and dat's tah wait, because I know you Blue and I know dat you will eventually get tired of Blink and you'll find out who you really are suppose tah be with. I don't care dat you aren't goin' tah be waitin' for me, but I'll be waitin' for you Blue."
"Skittery you have tah move on! I don't want tah be with you! I love Blink and dat's it. I'm sorry. You're my best friend and will always be my best friend. We aren't meant tah be lovers, we are meant tah be best friends, and dat's all I'll ever let us be."
"You won't ever give me a chance?" Skittery looked like he was about to cry.
"Skittery there will never be a chance because Blink and I will be together forever."
"Fine." Skittery's head fell and he turned away and headed towards Central Park.
"Skittery!" He turned around and Blue could see tears in his eyes. "I'm sorry."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Skittery, dat's enough. We can't do dis anymore!" That voice sounded so familiar. Was it Zippy? No, it was too high for Zippy. Where have I heard that voice before?
"What are you talkin' about? Dis is da way it's suppose tah be." Skittery was saying.
"Skittery I can't do dis! I gave you your chance but it's done now. I can't do dis!" She gave him a chance? Why does this all sound so familiar? I continued to watch to see if I could get a glimpse of this girl. I saw Skittery go and kiss her. About a few seconds later the girl pushed Skittery away and finally came out from behind him. My jaw dropped almost down to the ground. My eyes felt like they popped out of my head. I feel like someone just knocked the wind out of me. This isn't happening. It can't be true! I felt my legs and arms turn into jelly. It was almost as if someone just reached in and pulled my heart out. I felt like I was dying, and I wish I did. This hurt me more than seeing my sister with Spot. This was the worst pain ever. My worst nightmare had come true. The thing that I suspected all along was true. There was something going on. All those thoughts in my head weren't just random thoughts, they were true. Standing in the alleyway was Skittery and Blue.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(A/N: Blink's flashback are done now.) Why didn't I see it before? I kept asking myself. It was so obvious. It was right in front of my face this whole time. I felt a hand on my shoulder.
"Blink?" Blue said crying.
"Get your fuckin' hands off me Blue!" I said swatting her hand away from me. I was crying harder now than before. "You bitch! Maybe Spot was right. You're nothin' but a whore Blue. You always were. You don't know how tah love because you don't know what love is! You never loved anyone."
"Blink how can you say dat?"
"Because it's true. You never loved me. You can't love someone if you don't know what love is. You know what, you deserved everythin' you got in life! You're nothin' but a fuckin' bitch!" I was out of control now. I raised my hand and slapped her. I couldn't stop myself. I was punching and kicking her.
"Blink stop it!" I ignored her cries and continued. Finally I stopped and looked down at her. Her face was bleeding and her arms were bruised. What the fuck was that all about? I never saw a side of me like that before. I hurt the one girl that I said I would never hurt. (A/N: Flashback.)
"You have my word dat I will never hurt you, no matter what happens. I will never do anythin' tah you like Spot did." (A/N: Okay flashbacks are done.) My God! I broke my promise. I promised her that I would never hurt her and I did. I just stared down at her. She wouldn't even look up at me now. I covered my mouth and just cried.
"My God Blue I'm so sorry! I didn't mean tah hurt you. I don't know what came over me." She was shaking.
"I've got tah go." I turned and ran back to the lodging house. She didn't even scream for me to stop now. What the hell had gotten into me? Why did I act like that? She brainwashed me. Everything about me was consumed with her. It had driven me to insanity.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Back at the lodging house everyone was doing there own thing. I stormed in the lodging house and ran over to my stuff. I started throwing everything into my bag.
"Blink, are you okay?" I heard Racetrack say. I didn't stop what I was doing. I just continued.
"Dude have you been cryin'?" Jack said following Race. I threw my bag on my back and ran out of the lodging house.
"Blink!" I heard all the guys yell. As I ran out of the door I ran right into Kane.
"James where are you goin'?" Kane asked.
"I'm goin' home Kane. But I need tah do somethin' first. I'll see you when I get home." I just continued to walk.
"James have you been cryin'?" I heard her yell. I just ran as fast as I could to Central Park to say goodbye to Blue. As I approached I saw Skittery hugging Blue, and kissing her on the forehead.
"What da fuck in goin' on here?" I said under my breath. I ran over to Skittery and Blue. I dropped my bag and pushed Skittery over. I started punching him and hitting him. (A/N: I know you guys are probably wondering why isn't anyone stopping them if they are in a public place like Central Park? Well I don't know, just got with it.)
"Blink stop it!" Blue ran up and tried to get me off Skittery. I just pushed her back. "Stop it!" Skittery finally got away and was just staring at me.
"What da fuck is your problem man?" Skittery asked.
"Dat's my fuckin' girl and you're all over her!" I said charging towards Skittery again.
"Blink stop it! Now!" She ran in front of me. "Skittery was just tryin' tah make me feel better."
"Dis is just proves what I was sayin' Blue, you are a whore."
"Don't ever call her dat you fuckin' bastard!"
"It's true Skittery, she just brainwashed you like everyone else. She wants both of us but can't make up her mind. So who do you want Blue? You can't have both. Here is your chance, which guy do you want?" Skittery and I both just looked at Blue.
"I don't know." She said crying.
"Dat's what I thought." I said going over to my bag. "Well I can solve your problem right now." I pulled a gun out of my bag.
"Blink what da fuck are you doin'?" She asked eyeing the gun.
"I'm makin' your decision easier for ya Blue. We will end dis problem here and now. Which guy do you want Blue? You can't love us both. If you say Skittery, then I'll blow my brains out and you can have Skittery, or you can have me and I'll kill Skittery." He aimed the gun at Skittery.
"Blink stop it! I don't know okay!"
"Come on Blue, who do you want?"
She was crying now. "Skittery." I just looked over at her. Was she serious?
"I want Skittery Blink. I want him alive! I love dat boy tah death but my love for him isn't da love dat I have for you! I want you too Blink but my want for you is different. I want Skittery alive but dat's it. He's my best friend but you're da one I love Blink. I want my future with you! I want my kids with you! I don't want any of dat with Skittery. I just want da friendship dat we share."
"So you want me huh? Is dat what you sayin'?" She stood up now continuing to cry.
"Yes. I always did."
"Fine then, but one of us has tah go. It was good knowin' you Skittery." I pulled the clutch back and aimed at Skittery.
"Blink no!" I heard Blue yell. That was the last thing dat I heard before I pulled the trigger. BANG! The gun had gone off. With my arms outstretched I just stood there. I couldn't believe my eyes! I just shot the gun. Why the hell did I do that? I started to tremble as I looked down at the ground. Laying on the ground, soaked in blood was Blue.