Chapter 5: Various Issues Are Explored Further

Author's Note: I have only provided an alternative to Series 3,25 and 4,1 so far; obviously not everything in Series 4 has to happen, in my version of events.

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When they reached the apartment, Monica and Rachel realised that the others were in Chandler and Joey's, from which sounds of loud laughter, including Phoebe's, were coming. It seemed as if a lively foosball game was in progress. They looked at each other.

"I'm pooped," said Rachel. "Too much emotion of all kinds. Let's turn in."

Monica nodded. "Good idea." Quite quickly they prepared for bed and gave each other a brief goodnight hug before retiring. Each recognised that the other had been very supportive and shown real commitment to the other's happiness at a moment of high emotional strain, and loved the other for it.

But Monica found that it was not easy to get to sleep. Her mind kept running over the scenes with Chandler. She cringed mentally as she realised that she had behaved a bit stupidly, to put it mildly. Everything she had done seemed to have alienated Chandler, rather than interested him in her. And then her mind jumped to the conversation between Phoebe and Rachel that she had overheard in the cab. Was it really possible that Chandler and Joey had a hidden gay attraction to each other? It was hard to believe, given their general behaviour. And yet, Carol had seemed for many years to be perfectly satisfied with Ross physically as well as emotionally. People could change. Perhaps it only needed the right stimulus. If that were the case, maybe she should try to suppress her feelings about Chandler. She decided that she ought to talk to Phoebe about it, for despite all her weird beliefs Phoebe seemed very wise in matters of the emotions. Resolving to do that, she drifted off.

The following morning Monica woke feeling refreshed, and threw herself into preparing breakfast with more than her usual energy. She could not help thinking about how she was going to face Chandler, and what she would say to him, but she felt that she could handle it better this morning.

As it happened, Phoebe was first to appear, just as Rachel emerged from her bedroom in her robe, yawning.

"Well, who said she was feeling like she was energised for work today?" said Phoebe to her teasingly, cocking her head on one side.

Rachel grinned. "I'm all ready for it, really. I just need to come awake a bit more. I was dreaming when the alarm went."

"Nice dream?" asked Monica lightly.

Rachel seemed to flush a little. "Um, well, sort of."

"Was it a sexy dream, then?" asked Phoebe.

Rachel's flush deepened. "Um, yeah, but it got interrupted because of the alarm, and that's all I'm gonna say." She walked across to the bathroom and shut the door firmly.

"H'm, I wonder who she was dreaming about," said Phoebe reflectively. "So, did you and she come to some understanding about Chandler?"

"You spotted it too?" queried Monica rather ruefully.

"It was beginng to become a bit obvious," said Phoebe. "So?"

"Rachel said she'd … stand aside," said Monica slowly, "which was good of her, wasn't it, Pheebs?"

Phoebe nodded. "I hate to say it," she said in a low voice, glancing at the bathroom, from which sounds of rather off-key song were now emerging, "but Ross picking Bonnie over her has been good for her. It's making her grow up. And as for Chandler, well, I think maybe you've had a sort of hidden crush on him for a while, but it's been hard to disentangle from your feelings of close friendship."

"Yeah," said Monica. She fidgeted about for a moment, arranging items on the table, then looked up at Phoebe and said, "Do you really think Chandler and Joey have hidden gay feelings for each other?"

"Let's get this straight," said Phoebe. "I think Joey could very well have them like subconsciously for Chandler. Look at how jealous he acted over Janice in the past. But as for Chandler's feelings about Joey, I just don't know. Half the time it's like he's just an elder brother trying to keep his dumb younger brother out of trouble, though he doesn't try very hard to wise him up, and sometimes he plays jokes on him. Then again, he often worries about hurting his feelings. But I don't get the same feeling of emotional attachment. But – oh man, this is difficult – look at that time when Joey moved out. Chandler was not happy."

"Nor was Joey," said Monica. "But … could they ever admit they had feelings for each other?"

Phoebe looked thoughtful for a long moment; then she shook her head. "For Chandler, ideas about being gay are all mixed up with his screwed-up feelings about his father. It would take something very strong to overcome that. As for Joey … can you imagine how his mom and dad would react, let alone his grandmothers? If you can't, let me tell you, if he ever thinks about this, he surely can imagine it! Again, it'd need like a really strong push to get him past that. I guess they'll be best buds until one gets married, and then likely they'll drift apart slowly."

"Why would they do that?" said Monica, rather surprised.

Phoebe regarded her a little sadly. "Lots of men don't like it when their wives have their own friends that the husbands don't know, or don't like if they do know. It's not so often said that it works the other way too. Lots of women don't like their men having their own friends and going off on their own, either; it's like they want to keep them under their eye, they don't trust them absolutely. So pairs of close male friends are likely to drift apart when one gets married. And anyway, if you're not with each other constantly, friendships can go cool, even the closest." Now her expression was definitely melancholy. "Look at me and Leslie. But then, we broke up, and after the little bitch did it to me twice, I don't think of her as a friend any more."

"Oh Pheebs!" said Monica, full of sympathy. "Does it still hurt?"

Phoebe sighed, then suddenly she grinned. "Only when I laugh. Now we'd better get onto some less interesting topic before the guys show up."

At that point Rachel emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her hair.

"You seem to be having a good old gossip," she said. "Anything I'm allowed to hear?"

"It was mainly more of what we were talking about in the cab yesterday," said Phoebe. "Which would possibly have a bearing on anyone's getting involved with Chandler."

Rachel nodded, her face suddenly serious. "I don't myself think Chandler is gay in any meaningful sense," she said. "But, anyway, I'm standing by what I said yesterday, Mon, just in case you thought it was the drink talking." She smiled at her. "I'm gonna try to be a good girl, from here on in. Now I must get dressed." She hurried to her bedroom.

The other two looked after her affectionately. Then the door opened and Chandler and Joey came in. Joey was his usual smiling self; Chandler had a slightly withdrawn look, and greeted them with a wary "Hello girls!"

"Hi Chandler!" said Phoebe. "Got over having your ass whupped at foosball?"

Chandler grinned a little. "I'm used to it," he said. "I'll bet even Rachel could beat me if she tried."

"I thought you were worried about the violation of the players' human rights, Pheebs," said Monica teasingly.

"But, see, they like playing, they're totally into it," said Phoebe. "That's what I hadn't appreciated before. And it sure is fun beating Chandler."

"Yeah," said Monica reminiscently. "But we oughtn't to rub it in too much. I mean, we all suck at something."

"Why, what do you think you suck at, Mon?" said Joey through a mouthful of cereal.

"Personal relationships," said Monica seriously. "If the guys don't screw 'em up, I screw 'em up." She looked directly at Chandler. "On a related topic, sorry I put pressure on you last night." She tried to make it sound light and non-pressuring.

Chandler did not hold her gaze. Looking uncomfortable, he stared at the table. "That's okay," he muttered. It quickly became clear that he wasn't going to say any more. Before the silence could get too uncomfortable, Monica sat down and applied herself to her breakfast, refusing to be downhearted. She knew it was going to be a long haul to get back on really easy terms with Chandler.

This did not make it any easier to see his display of pleasure when Rachel arrived looking neat in one of her work outfits, but she had to hand it to Rachel. While perfectly pleasant to Chandler, she behaved as if things were the way they had always been, before they had kissed, rather passionately, last night. Anyone could see that this was frustrating Chandler. But then Ross arrived, seeming very cheerful despite the fact that he did not appear to have had enough sleep. After greeting everyone, he produced an enormous yawn, then a moment later a second, after which he looked around with an apologetic grin.

"Bonnie and I are together again," he said, "as I guess you may know. We, um, celebrated this rather."

"Well, at least we were all out of earshot," said Chandler rather acidly.

Ross looked rueful. "Yeah, she is kinda loud, isn't she? But, you know, that makes me feel good, to know I please her so." Then he looked at Rachel somewhat guiltily. "Sorry, Rach, I shouldn't really be talking like this."

"That's okay," said Rachel, with rather more conviction than Chandler had shown earlier. "I'm happy for you, Ross, honestly."

"I owe you one, for being so straight with Bonnie," he said seriously. "Um, there are some nice unattached guys in the Museum …"

Rachel burst out laughing. "Thanks, Ross, but one dinosaur geek is enough."

"They're not all dinosaur specialists," he began, looking somewhat offended, but then he stopped and his face took on a sly look. "Well, I understand you have a secret admirer – or maybe he's not so secret any more?"

Chandler sat up straight, flushing, but before he could say anything Rachel giggled. "And where might you have heard that from?" she said coquettishly. "Has Bonnie been telling tales?"

"Um, well, yeah, that was my source," Ross admitted. "Who would have thought, all that time you were working in Central Perk …" He snickered.

"I did sometimes wonder," Rachel said. "But it was only last night that he came right out and asked me for a date. But you know, Ross, it's not all that funny. I had to tell him no, and you could see it hit him hard, though I tried to let him down nicely."

"I'll say," Phoebe commented. "That was some kiss you gave him."

"You kissed Gunther?" Ross said, suddenly looking and sounding mad.

"We all did," said Rachel, looking at him steadily, "just as we all kissed Joey and Chandler.

We had had a little too much to drink, to be honest. And why you should care, Ross Geller, is more than I know!" she finished in a rather sharp tone of voice. Then she jumped to her feet. "If I don't start heading for Bloomingdales soon, I'll be so late and Joanna will kill me," she said. "See you guys later."

She was gone before Ross, who had looked rather taken aback, spoke again.

"You all did some kissing?" he said in a rather accusing tone, looking around them, and especially sternly at Monica.

"Yeah," said Phoebe. "It was just for fun, once each, and I agree with Rachel: why should you care? You were doing a lot more than kissing yesterday evening, by what you say."

"The Reverend Geller will be preaching shortly on the topic 'Do as I say, don't do as I do, especially if you're my ex-girlfriend or sister'," remarked Chandler satirically.

"Yeah, you really have got to control your tendency to behave like you had a right to say who Rachel should kiss," said Monica rather belligerently, "let alone me."

"That ought to be 'let alone I'," said Ross in his most pedantic manner, getting to his feet. "I'm only trying to look out for you both."

"What possible harm could kissing Gunther or Chandler or Joey do us, you fossil-loving pedant?" Monica stormed. "For Heaven's sake recognise that we're all grown up and can look after ourselves."

"Getting drunk and going around kissing people doesn't suggest it," Ross riposted as he made for the door.

Jumping up, Monica yelled after him,"You kissed Rachel when you were sober." But, perhaps finally recognising that he was on shaky ground, Ross made no reply.

"Sometimes Ross is really a pain in the ass," growled Monica as she sat down again.

"Yeah, and unlike some of us he doesn't even have the excuse of not having a woman in his life," said Chandler. For a moment he and Monica exchanged a look of complete sympathy.

Joey snickered. "Maybe he's jumpy because he's going short of sleep."

"That never seems to bother you," said Phoebe, winking at him.

Joey produced a lazy grin. "I can catch up in naps during the day. I don't suppose Ross has that option."

"Lazybones!" said Phoebe fondly, tousling his hair. "Well, I guess I should be on my way too. I do have some employment."

"You remind me that I do," said Chandler in a mournful tone. He got to his feet with a worldweary air. "See you guys in Central Perk at lunchtime maybe, or if not, then this evening."

He gave Monica a brief grin before departing, which cheered her considerably because it suggested that he had forgiven her.

"Good old Ross!" said Phoebe, who noticed this. "He does a great job of uniting the rest of us in being pissed off at him."

"Yeah, but he doesn't realise he's doing it, so he doesn't deserve any credit," said Monica. "Well, I'd better start another job search."

"Good luck," cried Phoebe as she left. "See you later."

Left alone, Monica cleared away and washed the dishes in a reflective mood. The break at the beach house had been fun, but here they were, bickering with each other again. She wholly sympathised with Rachel on this one: how could Ross conceivably imagine that he had a right to get mad if she kissed Gunther? She sighed as she realised that he would have to be faced soon. She hoped he would not be too sad.

She was putting away dishes when the phone rang. Curious to know who it might be at this hour of the morning, she picked up and gave her name.

"Monica," said a familiar voice, slightly indistinct. "Are you still interested in being head chef in my restaurant? This isn't a bribe to get you back. I just think, after interviewing others, that you might be perfect for the job."

"Pete!" she cried. "How are you?"

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How about that for a cliffhanger?