Joe had woken up feeling run-down. His head felt a little weird but it didn't actually hurt and his energy level was almost nil. Dr. Holden entered his room a little before seven and told Joe it was time for his physical. Feeling too tired to argue, Joe sat up and let the doctor poke and prod all he wanted. Joe thought he saw his dad masquerading as the inspector in the hall but since he couldn't talk to him, he just remained still and let Dr. Holden finish.
After Joe's physical he was put through his morning regime, complete with a breakfast he could not remember, and given more "vitamins". Finally, he was escorted to the psychiatrist's office.
"Hello, Joe," Turner greeted him as he entered and closed the door. Joe gave him a slight nod and took his seat. "I thought we would begin today by talking about your relationship with your father," Turner continued. "Unless you have something specific you wish to discuss?"
"No," Joe mumbled with a small shake of his head.
"You said before that you thought your dad was super," Dr. Turner began. "Can you tell me why?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Joe countered softly. "He's the greatest detective ever," Joe told him. "He's always helping people and he's really smart and observant."
"And it was his power of observation that recognized you needed help?" Turner asked.
"N..no," Joe replied, his forehead breaking into wrinkles as he frowned. 'Why hadn't his dad noticed?' "But once he thought I might need help he took me to the doctor straightaway," Joe added defensively.
"I see," said Dr. Turner, making a notation on his clipboard. "Tell me about the last time you and your dad did something fun together."
"Dad, Frank and I..." began Joe.
"Just you and your father," Turner interrupted him.
Joe remained silent as he thought of the last time only he and his father had done anything together. After a bit, he smiled. "We went to a car race together," Joe said. "Dad came home the night before with two tickets and asked me to go with him," Joe went quiet as he waited to see if Turner would speak. When he never, Joe continued. "We met two of the racers and one of the managers afterwards."
"Your father went to great lengths to assure you enjoyed yourself," Dr. Turner commented. "He must have had some connections to get close after the race."
"Yeah, well, Dad was working on a case and the manager we met up with was his contact," Joe said with a shrug.
"I see," Dr. Turner said and his lips turned down just a fraction as he made another notation. "But your father did choose to take you instead of your brother with the extra ticket he had," he commented.
"Uh-huh," agreed Joe, frowning. His dad had taken him instead of Frank, but had it been because he wanted too or because Joe knew more about cars and his dad had wanted a couple of cars checked out while he kept the drivers and crew busy?
"Do you and your dad do a lot together?" Turner inquired. "That isn't work related or with your brother or mother?"
Joe looked into Turner's eyes, his own filling with pain as he shook his head. "No...no, I guess not," he admitted, remembering when his father had promised to take him fishing only to cancel at the last minute leaving Joe to go with a neighbor who had acted more like a father to him than his own.
"What about your mother?" inquired Dr. Turner. "Are the two of you close?"
"I guess," Joe answered, not really sure of anything at the moment.
"Do you and your mother spend any, pardon the expression, quality time together?" Turner inquired.
"We don't actually go anywhere together but she seems to know when I am feeling down and need to talk," Joe replied. "Sometimes we'll work in the garden together or play cards. But, I guess, most of the time we are together is when I am hurt and she is talking care of me."
"Do you get hurt a lot?"
Joe snorted derisively. "That's putting it mildly. In the past year I have been admitted to the hospital eight times and that's only counting the times I was in for over three days."
"Perhaps you should be more careful," suggested Turner.
"I know," agreed Joe with a scowl. "Frank's always telling me that."
"Your brother?"
Joe nodded. "If it weren't for him I would have died a long time ago," he continued. "He's saved my life many times."
"Do you spend a lot of time with Frank?"
"Oh, yeah," Joe said with a smile. "We do almost everything together. Or we did," he amended. "Lately, he's been spending a lot of time with Callie and Phil."
"And you feel left out?"
"Kind of," confessed Joe. "I know I probably depend on Frank too much but he's always been there. When we were kids he made sure no one picked on me. If I got hurt, he was by my side in seconds. Even now when I end up in the hospital, Frank is the one who stays with me until I wake up."
"But with him spending more time with friends, you feel that he might not always be there for you?" Turner asked.
"No!" Joe denied. "Frank would never let me down."
"I see," Turner replied. "He's the one who recognized that you had lost so much weight?"
"N...no," Joe answered.
"He didn't notice even though you two are so close?" Turner asked in mock disbelief.
"Well, no," Joe said. "But then I pretty much avoided him," he quickly added.
"Why?"
"Because I knew he wouldn't let me exercise or skip meals," Joe answered truthfully.
"Do you think your avoidance of him could have made him realize you don't need him as much as he thought you did and so he has moved on with his own life?" Turner inquired.
"What?" Joe gasped, not wanting to believe what he thought he was hearing. "Are you suggesting I was keeping him from his own life?"
"No, not at all," Turner denied. "You are the one who said he was always there for you until recently when you avoided him and instead of his commanding your attention, he began spending more time with his friends."
Joe sat with his mouth hanging open. He didn't want to admit it, but it was true. He was too much trouble. He had been keeping Frank from living his own life. No wonder Frank hadn't noticed! He had actually been enjoying his time away from Joe. And his mother had better things to do than sit around the hospital watching him. He wasn't a child anymore. And his father! Joe closed his eyes and swallowed. No wonder his dad didn't want to spend any time with him. He must be the biggest disappointment!
A tear slipped down Joe's face. Why hadn't he seen it before? How could he have been so thoughtless? So selfish? His family would be better off without him.
After Joe's physical he was put through his morning regime, complete with a breakfast he could not remember, and given more "vitamins". Finally, he was escorted to the psychiatrist's office.
"Hello, Joe," Turner greeted him as he entered and closed the door. Joe gave him a slight nod and took his seat. "I thought we would begin today by talking about your relationship with your father," Turner continued. "Unless you have something specific you wish to discuss?"
"No," Joe mumbled with a small shake of his head.
"You said before that you thought your dad was super," Dr. Turner began. "Can you tell me why?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Joe countered softly. "He's the greatest detective ever," Joe told him. "He's always helping people and he's really smart and observant."
"And it was his power of observation that recognized you needed help?" Turner asked.
"N..no," Joe replied, his forehead breaking into wrinkles as he frowned. 'Why hadn't his dad noticed?' "But once he thought I might need help he took me to the doctor straightaway," Joe added defensively.
"I see," said Dr. Turner, making a notation on his clipboard. "Tell me about the last time you and your dad did something fun together."
"Dad, Frank and I..." began Joe.
"Just you and your father," Turner interrupted him.
Joe remained silent as he thought of the last time only he and his father had done anything together. After a bit, he smiled. "We went to a car race together," Joe said. "Dad came home the night before with two tickets and asked me to go with him," Joe went quiet as he waited to see if Turner would speak. When he never, Joe continued. "We met two of the racers and one of the managers afterwards."
"Your father went to great lengths to assure you enjoyed yourself," Dr. Turner commented. "He must have had some connections to get close after the race."
"Yeah, well, Dad was working on a case and the manager we met up with was his contact," Joe said with a shrug.
"I see," Dr. Turner said and his lips turned down just a fraction as he made another notation. "But your father did choose to take you instead of your brother with the extra ticket he had," he commented.
"Uh-huh," agreed Joe, frowning. His dad had taken him instead of Frank, but had it been because he wanted too or because Joe knew more about cars and his dad had wanted a couple of cars checked out while he kept the drivers and crew busy?
"Do you and your dad do a lot together?" Turner inquired. "That isn't work related or with your brother or mother?"
Joe looked into Turner's eyes, his own filling with pain as he shook his head. "No...no, I guess not," he admitted, remembering when his father had promised to take him fishing only to cancel at the last minute leaving Joe to go with a neighbor who had acted more like a father to him than his own.
"What about your mother?" inquired Dr. Turner. "Are the two of you close?"
"I guess," Joe answered, not really sure of anything at the moment.
"Do you and your mother spend any, pardon the expression, quality time together?" Turner inquired.
"We don't actually go anywhere together but she seems to know when I am feeling down and need to talk," Joe replied. "Sometimes we'll work in the garden together or play cards. But, I guess, most of the time we are together is when I am hurt and she is talking care of me."
"Do you get hurt a lot?"
Joe snorted derisively. "That's putting it mildly. In the past year I have been admitted to the hospital eight times and that's only counting the times I was in for over three days."
"Perhaps you should be more careful," suggested Turner.
"I know," agreed Joe with a scowl. "Frank's always telling me that."
"Your brother?"
Joe nodded. "If it weren't for him I would have died a long time ago," he continued. "He's saved my life many times."
"Do you spend a lot of time with Frank?"
"Oh, yeah," Joe said with a smile. "We do almost everything together. Or we did," he amended. "Lately, he's been spending a lot of time with Callie and Phil."
"And you feel left out?"
"Kind of," confessed Joe. "I know I probably depend on Frank too much but he's always been there. When we were kids he made sure no one picked on me. If I got hurt, he was by my side in seconds. Even now when I end up in the hospital, Frank is the one who stays with me until I wake up."
"But with him spending more time with friends, you feel that he might not always be there for you?" Turner asked.
"No!" Joe denied. "Frank would never let me down."
"I see," Turner replied. "He's the one who recognized that you had lost so much weight?"
"N...no," Joe answered.
"He didn't notice even though you two are so close?" Turner asked in mock disbelief.
"Well, no," Joe said. "But then I pretty much avoided him," he quickly added.
"Why?"
"Because I knew he wouldn't let me exercise or skip meals," Joe answered truthfully.
"Do you think your avoidance of him could have made him realize you don't need him as much as he thought you did and so he has moved on with his own life?" Turner inquired.
"What?" Joe gasped, not wanting to believe what he thought he was hearing. "Are you suggesting I was keeping him from his own life?"
"No, not at all," Turner denied. "You are the one who said he was always there for you until recently when you avoided him and instead of his commanding your attention, he began spending more time with his friends."
Joe sat with his mouth hanging open. He didn't want to admit it, but it was true. He was too much trouble. He had been keeping Frank from living his own life. No wonder Frank hadn't noticed! He had actually been enjoying his time away from Joe. And his mother had better things to do than sit around the hospital watching him. He wasn't a child anymore. And his father! Joe closed his eyes and swallowed. No wonder his dad didn't want to spend any time with him. He must be the biggest disappointment!
A tear slipped down Joe's face. Why hadn't he seen it before? How could he have been so thoughtless? So selfish? His family would be better off without him.