Visions in the Night Sky
Chapter 8: Turning Circles
Their honeymoon successfully accomplished, Severus and Merewen returned to Hogwarts with renewed spirits. The school year rambled on, and to everyone who had known him before he met Merewen, Severus Snape was a changed man. His passion and respect for potions had not diminished, but there seemed to be a new fire in him. Merewen took over teaching the first through third years, giving Severus the leisure to concentrate on the older, more advanced students that he enjoyed. Students that continued with potions after their fifth year were a special group of young people indeed, and Severus was going to make sure that they got the education they deserved.
Spring was melting its way to Hogwarts in March. The longer days and extra sun seemed to energize Merewen most of the time, but lately she had begun to feel downright lethargic. She had been sick, but she wasn't sure what was wrong. It felt as though she had suffered through the world's worst case of the stomach flu. She didn't dare tell Severus that she didn't know what was wrong. He had been very sensitive today. Several students had managed to stoke his fury, and Merewen had been steering clear of him unless she really needed something.
One evening, after a particularly trying day, Severus had shouted at several of his students and demanded that they serve detention for some small infraction of the rules. He was still at his desk when Merewen arrived back from the hospital wing, having conferred with Madam Pomfrey and discovered the reason for her illness. She knocked timidly on Severus' office door.
"Severus?" she asked. "Are you busy?" She poked her head in the door to find him at his desk up to his eyes in paperwork.
"Does it look like I'm busy?" he grumbled. Merewen carefully entered the room and shut the door behind her.
"Would you like me to help you? I could correct some of this for you," she asked.
"I am quite capable of accomplishing this myself if left alone, if you don't mind," he said without looking up at her. Merewen fell silent a moment. She wasn't sure if it was wise to press him, but she needed to talk to him.
"It's late and tomorrow is Saturday. Come to bed and we can finish in the morning," Merewen suggested, walking around the desk to rest her arm across his shoulders.
"I said I didn't want to be disturbed! How many times to do I have to say that!" Severus shouted. Merewen staggered back a bit as he rose from his desk to face her.
"I warned the students not to bother me and they come anyway! I ask that the faculty not disturb me and three of them come with requests for this and that!" Severus roared.
"I'm not the faculty! I'm your wife!" Merewen shouted back.
"I already told you I'm not ready to stop yet!" Severus yelled, slamming his books and throwing them across his desk.
"I had something important to tell you! You don't have to shout at me!" Merewen cried, bracing herself from falling backwards by clutching the side of a shelf.
"Don't back talk me!" he bellowed in reply. Without thinking, he raised his arm and half a second later, Merewen was on the stone floor, one hand covering her face. She stared up at Severus with eyes wide with shock and fear. She tried to cry out but all she managed was a whimper.
Severus suddenly shook his head and looked down at his hands in realization. What had he just done? He couldn't believe he had just struck the woman he loved. He had promised her over and over he would not become his father and tonight he had. She had only come to talk to him and he had treated her terribly. He knew she had been ill. Had Madam Pomfrey discovered something? Could there be something perilously wrong with his newlywed bride? Severus started to shake as he turned to look at Merewen, who was inching away from him. Severus collapsed to his knees and crept toward her. She tried to inch away faster but there was nowhere to go. She was sobbing now, and Severus' look had changed completely. He gathered Merewen into his arms, holding her tighter as she fought him, and apologized over and over, hoping that at least one of these apologies would find her heart. They sat there on the floor and Severus rocked her as he held her, kissing her temple and the top of her head.
"I'm so sorry! Oh God, Merewen, I'm so sorry! I'll never do that again! I'm so sorry! Oh, Merewen I love you so much! Can you ever forgive me? I'm so sorry!" Severus murmured over her sobbing. Slowly, her tears slowed and stopped. The two sat in silence for what seemed like all night before Severus spoke again.
"Darling, you came to tell me something tonight. What was it?" Severus asked. Merewen took a deep, shuddering breath and swallowed before answering him.
"I spoke with Madam Pomfrey today about how sick I've been lately," Merewen replied. "She says there's nothing wrong."
"But what caused you to be so sick?" Severus asked softly, stroking her hair, his eyes wide with concern.
"I'm pregnant."
Severus' heart soared. A baby! Severus was going to be a father! Seconds later, his heart plummeted back to earth. He had hurt Merewen tonight, physically. Could he have hurt the baby? Fear laced his heartbeat as he looked at his wife, glancing at her belly and back again, placing his hand over it.
"We're really…I mean we're going to….we…Oh, Love!" Severus cried, kissing Merewen with all his heart. Merewen accepted his kiss and later, after talking for nearly three hours, she accepted his apology as well. Breathless, Severus snuggled into bed beside Merewen that night, his arms wrapped around her abdomen. She cuddled backwards into his arms and pulled the covers over them, sure now that everything was going to be okay.
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