Disclaimer: I now claim ownership of both Monty Python and Star Trek, and I will not relinquish it until the former owners bring up the legal records that prove I
don't own it! Either that, or until they sue me. Or just yell at me. Or simply talk to me about it. It all works.
Tavia - yeah, it kind've is basically the movie with the names switched about. I'll work on that, though. And I didn't realize that this was all that risky… But risks are
our business. When man first looked to the stars - Oh, yeah. Must continue with the review-responce-thingy.
IIShameekaII - Not quite, but those migratory coconuts will work one day. Does anybody know Dr. Frankenstein's number? And I fully intend to continue writing
this. Couldn't let the reviews stop, could I?
Master Kenobi - Don't like Star Trek?! BLASPHEMOUS! Oh well. Everyone loves Monty Python, though. Right? Oh, and can I have those said two cents? Not
your thoughts, the actual money? Please? I'm broke...
If you recall, we left Kirk and Patsy riding past the dead-cart, it's master, and aguy just putting an old man on the cart. They surmised that he was a Captain because
he didn't have shit all over him. They were, coincidentally, correct.
So we now rejoin Kirk as he comes up behind a person wheeling a cart towards a nearby Starship. Why the Starship is on the ground is anyone's guess.
"Old woman!" Kirk called to her.
"I'm a man." She, er, he, said back.
"No, you're a woman."
"And why is that?"
"Because I said you are!" Kirk said. "Now who lives in that Starship?"
"I'm not old. I'm 37."
"That doesn't matter." Kirk said.
The man, or woman, or whatever, grumbled at this. "Nobody lives there." He, or she, then proceeded to explain a system of government that sounds
strangely like a democracy.
Kirk frowned.
"Uh, that sounds, uh, nice. I'll just be on my way."
"Well, wait here a minute." Said the man. Or woman.
"Yes?" Kirk asked.
"Who are you?"
"I am Kirk, Captain of the Enterprise"
"Captain?"
"Yes."
"How'd you become that?"
"The lady of the lake, handed me the sword Excalibur, therefore proclaiming me to be King."
"Hmm? Oh, sorry. Wrong script." Kirk apologized, and continued on his way.
The old man-lady-thing-that-really-isn't-that-old looked strangely at Kirk's back for a few moments, then continued on his/her way towards the Starship.
Spock pondered something. What he was pondering we may never know, and it being Spock, we probably wouldn't understand. Suffice to say, he was
pondering something when Kirk and Patsy did their little fake-horse-riding-manuever to get to him. Why they did this, we'll never know, and again, we probably
wouldn't understand. Unless, naturally, they were doing this for no reason other then that they did it in the movie, and this would simply make the whole story
funnier, so I'm telling them to do it since I'm the author and all. Well, one of theauthors. You see -
"Excuse me! It's bad enough being forced to ride around like this, looking like idiots, but then having you ignore us is adding insult to injury! Now, get on
with the story or I'll quit! And it better be fun, or I'll quit anyways!" Kirk said. He looked rather upset and annoyed as he did it, too, for whatever reason. Personally
I think it may have something to do with -
"A-herm."
Oh, right. The story. Kirk was cut off from reaching Spock by a group of mechanics chanting technobabble, and then smacking themselves in the head with
a wrench. Why they did this, we may, again, never know.
But I'll continue before Kirk gets upset again. When the mechanics cleared, Kirk and Ensign Patsy were again cut off by a group of villagers rambling
nonsense about this girl they found being some sort of android and asking Spock if they could toss her into the - Well, someplace that a normal human being
wouldn't like to go into.
Kirk saw her and stared into her eyes. He was going to ask her out, if she weren't an android. If she were...
"Oh, I can't wait. The suspence is killing me!" Patsy said.
Bwah. I'll let it kill you, too, unless you review. Actually, I'm gonna start working on the next chapter directly after this. And I know it's short.
don't own it! Either that, or until they sue me. Or just yell at me. Or simply talk to me about it. It all works.
Tavia - yeah, it kind've is basically the movie with the names switched about. I'll work on that, though. And I didn't realize that this was all that risky… But risks are
our business. When man first looked to the stars - Oh, yeah. Must continue with the review-responce-thingy.
IIShameekaII - Not quite, but those migratory coconuts will work one day. Does anybody know Dr. Frankenstein's number? And I fully intend to continue writing
this. Couldn't let the reviews stop, could I?
Master Kenobi - Don't like Star Trek?! BLASPHEMOUS! Oh well. Everyone loves Monty Python, though. Right? Oh, and can I have those said two cents? Not
your thoughts, the actual money? Please? I'm broke...
If you recall, we left Kirk and Patsy riding past the dead-cart, it's master, and aguy just putting an old man on the cart. They surmised that he was a Captain because
he didn't have shit all over him. They were, coincidentally, correct.
So we now rejoin Kirk as he comes up behind a person wheeling a cart towards a nearby Starship. Why the Starship is on the ground is anyone's guess.
"Old woman!" Kirk called to her.
"I'm a man." She, er, he, said back.
"No, you're a woman."
"And why is that?"
"Because I said you are!" Kirk said. "Now who lives in that Starship?"
"I'm not old. I'm 37."
"That doesn't matter." Kirk said.
The man, or woman, or whatever, grumbled at this. "Nobody lives there." He, or she, then proceeded to explain a system of government that sounds
strangely like a democracy.
Kirk frowned.
"Uh, that sounds, uh, nice. I'll just be on my way."
"Well, wait here a minute." Said the man. Or woman.
"Yes?" Kirk asked.
"Who are you?"
"I am Kirk, Captain of the Enterprise"
"Captain?"
"Yes."
"How'd you become that?"
"The lady of the lake, handed me the sword Excalibur, therefore proclaiming me to be King."
"Hmm? Oh, sorry. Wrong script." Kirk apologized, and continued on his way.
The old man-lady-thing-that-really-isn't-that-old looked strangely at Kirk's back for a few moments, then continued on his/her way towards the Starship.
Spock pondered something. What he was pondering we may never know, and it being Spock, we probably wouldn't understand. Suffice to say, he was
pondering something when Kirk and Patsy did their little fake-horse-riding-manuever to get to him. Why they did this, we'll never know, and again, we probably
wouldn't understand. Unless, naturally, they were doing this for no reason other then that they did it in the movie, and this would simply make the whole story
funnier, so I'm telling them to do it since I'm the author and all. Well, one of theauthors. You see -
"Excuse me! It's bad enough being forced to ride around like this, looking like idiots, but then having you ignore us is adding insult to injury! Now, get on
with the story or I'll quit! And it better be fun, or I'll quit anyways!" Kirk said. He looked rather upset and annoyed as he did it, too, for whatever reason. Personally
I think it may have something to do with -
"A-herm."
Oh, right. The story. Kirk was cut off from reaching Spock by a group of mechanics chanting technobabble, and then smacking themselves in the head with
a wrench. Why they did this, we may, again, never know.
But I'll continue before Kirk gets upset again. When the mechanics cleared, Kirk and Ensign Patsy were again cut off by a group of villagers rambling
nonsense about this girl they found being some sort of android and asking Spock if they could toss her into the - Well, someplace that a normal human being
wouldn't like to go into.
Kirk saw her and stared into her eyes. He was going to ask her out, if she weren't an android. If she were...
"Oh, I can't wait. The suspence is killing me!" Patsy said.
Bwah. I'll let it kill you, too, unless you review. Actually, I'm gonna start working on the next chapter directly after this. And I know it's short.