Chapter 8
Home is where your best friend is
A/N: because the last chapter was so pointless I have decided that I'll give you another chapter at the same time, just because I feel like being nice and I've been drinking way too much red cordial. Anyway, enough of that. Onto the story.
Friday 0214
She was standing at the window of Harm's apartment, looking out at he snow. She heard footsteps behind her and a moment later a pair of warm arms slid around her waist, pulling her into a comforting embrace.
"Sarah" He breathed, making her shiver delicately at the use of her first name. She felt the hands move from her waist to her arms, where they gently turned her around to face him.
"Sarah, you have no idea how much I love you."
"I love you, Harm."
He pulled her closer to him and bent down slightly, capturing her lips in a passionate kiss. Her arms snaked around his neck and she deepened the kiss, her lips silently begging for more, the heat surging through her. His hands made their way up and under her shirt, moving carefully over the smooth skin of her back, making her gasp at the sensations he caused her. She fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, pushing it down off his shoulders. His hands moved around to the front then wandered higher, eliciting a low moan from her. The two of them began to move in the direction of Harm's bedroom. As they neared it, her foot caught on the corner of the chair and she tripped and fell...
*THUD*
Friday 0214
Room 178
A hotel in DC
Sarah Mackenzie fell onto the hard (but thankfully carpeted) floor of her hotel room. She bit back the stream of curses that immediately came to mind, the majority of which had been picked up from some particularly foul mouthed marines she had been at boot camp with, and were most definitely not suitable to be uttering around Ali, regardless of whether she was asleep or not. After getting herself a drink of water, Mac climbed into bed and tried to go back to sleep. Unfortunately for her, every time she shut her eyes all she could seem to see was Harm. She tried everything including counting sheep, however even the non-existent sheep were against her and within minutes all the sheep in her mind were either baaing 'Ha-a-arm' or had turned into tomcats for her to count. Had it been some other time then she may have found the tricks her mind was playing on her quite amusing, as no doubt Harm would too, but she was tired and wanted to go back to sleep. She sighed. It was going to be a long night.
Damn him
Friday 0736
Room 178
A hotel in DC
Mac lay awake staring up at the ceiling, as she had been doing for the last six minutes and twelve seconds. She wondered vaguely why she was staring at it, because it was boring as hell -- plain white with not a single pattern to occupy her wandering eyes. Suddenly deciding that she was bored, she drew her eyes away from the ceiling and looked instead at her peacefully sleeping daughter. She reached out and stroked Ali's hair absent-mindedly, marvelling at how incredible her daughter was. It never ceased to amaze her, even after almost three years, that she had actually created such a beautiful thing.
In her minds eye she suddenly pictured herself holding another child, a son, who had piercingly green eyes. Awfully familiar green eyes, with no doubt as to exactly whose eyes they were. Thinking about Harm and children at the same time conjured up fond memories of her watching him with little AJ. Mac had marveled at how natural Harm had been at taking care of AJ. The most memorable occasion that came to mind, however, was the day of AJ's birth. She could still remember standing outside the JAG headquarters and making their deal, all those years ago. She realised with a jolt that AJ was actually not quite five years old yet...although his fifth birthday was just around the corner. If Harm was to bring up the subject then she felt that she might actually be tempted to still take him up on the deal.
She knew that to some, her even considering something like that would seem disgraceful given the circumstances of her private life, however the last day or so had made her realise a few things. The first was that she really wasn't awfully upset about the prospect of divorcing Rob -- she was more hurt by the fact that he had never really trusted her. The second thing that she realised, and that scared her, was that being back in DC and once again single (or close enough) she was falling for Harm all over again, and she knew it. She had been sure that she was over him, but last night's dream, among other things, had made it painfully clear that she was most certainly not over him. She sighed. Maybe this time she would actually give it a try. After all, she had nothing to lose.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Over the next few weeks the divorce papers were finalised and signed and now all Mac had to do was wait for it to be processed. She and Ali had moved into heir new apartment in Mac's old apartment building and they loved it. Mac was loving being back at JAG and Ali was fitting right in at her new daycare centre, with little AJ taking care of her as though he were her big brother. Mac and Harm were getting along wonderfully and in general, everything was running smoothly. That is, until about 6 weeks after Mac had left, when Rob called. Called to say that he was sorry and had realised what a jerk he had been and that he wanted Mac to come back. It had all been too much for Mac, who had been in her office when the phone had rung, breaking her train of thought on the Henderson case. Rob had then proceeded to beg her to cancel the divorce and return 'home'. The thing was, Mac felt for the first time in years she actually was home. To a lot of people, home was where their loved ones were, or where they grew up, but to Mac, home was where her best friend was.
"Please Sarah, I'm begging you. Come home."
"I already am home, Rob. DC is home to me. I've already made up my mind. I'm not coming back to you." She stated firmly, finding it more and more difficult to say no. Damn him! Why did he have to seem so sweet all of a sudden?
"But Sarah, I love you. I know I've made mistakes and screwed up, but I have realised what an idiot I've been and I just want you back. Please, baby, I...."
It was the tender endearment that almost broke her resolve. "Stop it!" she interrupted. It was just so hard not to give in. The man on the other end of the phone was suddenly once again the man she had originally married. The kind, sweet, sensitive Rob.
"Just leave me alone, Rob. I'm staying here and that's final. Please don't call me again, especially not at work."
She slammed down the phone and buried her head in her hands, fighting back the tears that were creating a burning sensation behind her eyelids. She knew rationally that she shouldn't listen to Rob, that she should just keep on moving forwards, for her own good and Ali's. Another part of her, however, argued that she should give Rob a second chance, that maybe he really was sorry and willing to change.
Overwhelmed with conflicting emotions and with no idea what to do, she shoved back her chair and walked across the bullpen, still fighting back the tears, to Harm's office.
"Hey sailor. Got a minute for a friend?" she asked quietly, standing in the doorway, her voice catching, making him look up, immediately concerned.
" I'll always have a minute for a friend, and for my best friend, a lifetime." He told her seriously. "What's wrong?" he asked, pulling her in and closing the door and the blinds.
His kindness, on top of her uncertainties about Rob, was just too much for her to handle and the tears she had fought so hard to keep at bay leaked out of her eyes. Harm said nothing but silently held out his arms. Sobbing, she allowed herself to be drawn into his comforting embrace, her face buried in his shoulder while he stroked her hair. When she had calmed down a bit he spoke.
"What's up, Sarah." Harm asked gently, genuinely concerned for Mac. There were only a very small amount of times he had seen her cry, the last of which had been after she had left Rob. Somehow this was different, he thought. He could tell that she wasn't crying because she was hurt or upset or mad. No, she looked more like a lost little girl, crying because she didn't know what to do. He reached up to her face and wiped her tears away with his thumbs, relishing the feel of her soft skin beneath his. Any excuse to touch her.... not that he would wish this upon her.
"What is it, Mac. I'm your best friend. You can tell me." She looked up at him and gave him a watery smile.
"Yeah, you are my best friend. Thanks for that."
Harm smiled and guided her over to a chair in his office and sat her down and knelt in front of her, so that his eyes were level with hers. He looked so kind, so caring, that soon Mac was relating the whole tale to him, the words tumbling out of her mouth. She told him of how scared she was, how she felt guilty over leaving Rob , how part of her felt that she ought to give Rob another chance and how she was scared that she could be unintentionally hurting Ali. Harm sat down next to her and wrapped his arms around her, gently reassuring her.
Half an hour later, when she left, Harm pulled her in for one last reassuring hug and placed a light kiss on the top of her head.
"You'll be fine, ninja girl. I know you will."
A/N: So......do you like it? Like where its going. I promise that in the next few chapters there will be some Mac/Harm shippiness.... amid some good old angst, of course.