Behind The Mask Chapter 13 Bitterness
I did go to sleep in a dark green chair in the not so warm common room. I was too tired to comprehend anything, like the fact that there was a load of emotions that were bottled up inside, and were held in by the mask that left me sometime during the night. To be precise when I kissed Potter. The next day when I went to get my cloths, I found they were already folded nicely in a pile. * Harry * I thought. That name was foreign even to my mind, but oh so sweet. I conjured up a bag and put my things in it, neatly and slowly. I walked out of the room, and into another, it was an empty office lounge. I sat in one of the chairs after putting my cloths in a dusty dresser, and shutting the door. I let everything seep in. Painful things of my past that happened long before Hogwarts, and just resent pains came to mind.
I heard every word my dad yelled, the feel of his hand and cane when I was bad. Every dark spell...How he taught me how to burry my feelings. All the bad things I did to people weather it was words from me, or one of my 'thugs' fists'. Or what I did yesterday...and before. There were a lot of other things that were pushing to get out, and it all did, in tears. I started sobbing, I cried hard, for a long time. I normally don't cry, I normally wouldn't cry but I did. I cried tell I couldn't which seemed to be a long time. (This is where he's telling the story.) I'm just sitting reminiscing, thinking about all the relationships I went through this year. None of those people even came close to mattering then, maybe not even now, there was only one person who did who always has...and he feels a million miles away.
And it's completely my fault. Damn life really sucks. I could try to make up with him, but I'm a wreck. Besides he's better without me, I'm not better without him, but he is without me. I'd hurt him, hurt him more then I already have...I think...I don't know. I ran a hand through my messy hair. I was hungry, tired, and I really needed a shower. I wasn't going to sit around and feel sorry for myself all day, so I showered, changed, and I decided to go to Hogsmade later today to get some food. For now I decided to lie down and get some sleep. My mind was restless so I fell into wishful thinking dreams, of things of how they could be. Strangely enough some of it felt real.
I felt a hand on the side of my face, so gentle and warm, and small in size. My eyes opened, and I saw Harry in front of me smiling. "Hey, love you fell asleep in the chair again, work must be really taking its toll." Harry was older looking like in his early twenties, but he still had messy black hair, green eyes pale skin, and slim. He was still beautiful. "Huh?" I said still groggy. He laughed and pressed his forehead against mine. "Did you hear anything I just said?" "Yes, but I don't think I comprehended it. I'm so tired." I mumbled. I felt one of his hands on my knee the other on my face as he smiled. "I told you not to get extra hours." He said giving me the 'I told you so' look along with what he said. "Since when have I backed down from anything? Even if it means I'm so tired I could sleep standing." I asked with a slight smirk. "Never." He sat on my lap facing me. "But lately you have been...on account of tiredness." He hinted, with a seductive smile. "Have I?" I whispered, my hands rested on his hips.
"Yes." Harry panted, and I arched my hips upward, while I pulled him closer causing friction. He moaned quietly, as I let out a small groan. He closed the space between us, and I felt his sweet warm lips on mine. I smiled in the soft kiss. "My angel...my Harry." I whispered. "I love you Draco Malfoy, and don't you ever forget it." He whispered. "I wouldn't for the world, I love you too." I whispered. Then all the sudden a knife appeared in Harry's hand and he stabbed me in the heart. And I woke up. "I deserved that." I whispered, the thing was I felt his hands and the kiss. Not the weight or the warmth in my lap. Or the friction...Oh what a dirty mind I have. I looked at my watch and I realized it was almost time to go to Hogsmade. I fixed my hair, and went to join the mass of students going to Hogsmade for one reason or another. I saw Potter in the crowd the one who killed the old me for good. But what about the new me? I love him so much. I was stupid not to see sooner.
~Fin
I know it wasn't exactly them but it did get a little hotter no? LOL! He did say he was leaving the room...maybe something will happen at Hogsmade * wink *. Please read and review. ^_^ And stay toned.
I did go to sleep in a dark green chair in the not so warm common room. I was too tired to comprehend anything, like the fact that there was a load of emotions that were bottled up inside, and were held in by the mask that left me sometime during the night. To be precise when I kissed Potter. The next day when I went to get my cloths, I found they were already folded nicely in a pile. * Harry * I thought. That name was foreign even to my mind, but oh so sweet. I conjured up a bag and put my things in it, neatly and slowly. I walked out of the room, and into another, it was an empty office lounge. I sat in one of the chairs after putting my cloths in a dusty dresser, and shutting the door. I let everything seep in. Painful things of my past that happened long before Hogwarts, and just resent pains came to mind.
I heard every word my dad yelled, the feel of his hand and cane when I was bad. Every dark spell...How he taught me how to burry my feelings. All the bad things I did to people weather it was words from me, or one of my 'thugs' fists'. Or what I did yesterday...and before. There were a lot of other things that were pushing to get out, and it all did, in tears. I started sobbing, I cried hard, for a long time. I normally don't cry, I normally wouldn't cry but I did. I cried tell I couldn't which seemed to be a long time. (This is where he's telling the story.) I'm just sitting reminiscing, thinking about all the relationships I went through this year. None of those people even came close to mattering then, maybe not even now, there was only one person who did who always has...and he feels a million miles away.
And it's completely my fault. Damn life really sucks. I could try to make up with him, but I'm a wreck. Besides he's better without me, I'm not better without him, but he is without me. I'd hurt him, hurt him more then I already have...I think...I don't know. I ran a hand through my messy hair. I was hungry, tired, and I really needed a shower. I wasn't going to sit around and feel sorry for myself all day, so I showered, changed, and I decided to go to Hogsmade later today to get some food. For now I decided to lie down and get some sleep. My mind was restless so I fell into wishful thinking dreams, of things of how they could be. Strangely enough some of it felt real.
I felt a hand on the side of my face, so gentle and warm, and small in size. My eyes opened, and I saw Harry in front of me smiling. "Hey, love you fell asleep in the chair again, work must be really taking its toll." Harry was older looking like in his early twenties, but he still had messy black hair, green eyes pale skin, and slim. He was still beautiful. "Huh?" I said still groggy. He laughed and pressed his forehead against mine. "Did you hear anything I just said?" "Yes, but I don't think I comprehended it. I'm so tired." I mumbled. I felt one of his hands on my knee the other on my face as he smiled. "I told you not to get extra hours." He said giving me the 'I told you so' look along with what he said. "Since when have I backed down from anything? Even if it means I'm so tired I could sleep standing." I asked with a slight smirk. "Never." He sat on my lap facing me. "But lately you have been...on account of tiredness." He hinted, with a seductive smile. "Have I?" I whispered, my hands rested on his hips.
"Yes." Harry panted, and I arched my hips upward, while I pulled him closer causing friction. He moaned quietly, as I let out a small groan. He closed the space between us, and I felt his sweet warm lips on mine. I smiled in the soft kiss. "My angel...my Harry." I whispered. "I love you Draco Malfoy, and don't you ever forget it." He whispered. "I wouldn't for the world, I love you too." I whispered. Then all the sudden a knife appeared in Harry's hand and he stabbed me in the heart. And I woke up. "I deserved that." I whispered, the thing was I felt his hands and the kiss. Not the weight or the warmth in my lap. Or the friction...Oh what a dirty mind I have. I looked at my watch and I realized it was almost time to go to Hogsmade. I fixed my hair, and went to join the mass of students going to Hogsmade for one reason or another. I saw Potter in the crowd the one who killed the old me for good. But what about the new me? I love him so much. I was stupid not to see sooner.
~Fin
I know it wasn't exactly them but it did get a little hotter no? LOL! He did say he was leaving the room...maybe something will happen at Hogsmade * wink *. Please read and review. ^_^ And stay toned.