Pippin and the Tostido from Camelot-
Once upon an autumn afternoon, Pippin was taking a lovely stroll with his friend Merry on a secluded path. As they walked along the leave-strewn path, something very touching thing hit Pippin: Merry's hand. And it didn't hit in any old place, oh no. It spanked him hard on the butt. At first, Pippin thought he might try and pretend it never happened, until Merry repeated his gesture in a firmer fashion. Pippin screamed, "Get off me, you pervy molester!" and Merry stood in shock and disbelief. 'But you are the finest hobbit in all of Camelot, Pippin. Let me stroke your elbows, please." At that precise moment, Elrond leapt up out of the shrubbery sporting some Gucci pumps and a coordinating Prada handbag. "Hey guys, you like my new 'rags'?" Elrond asked in a high-pitched voice with an extreme lisp and a feminine touch. Pippin ran for it. Merry started making out with Elrond.
ABOUT THREE HOURS LATER
When Pippin had finally scaled almost three-fourths of Camelot, he ran across a familiar face: Legolas. "Hey Cupid, can you give me a lift on that there pony?" "Cupid?" Legolas asked, apparently offended. "Whatever fairy dust, just let me ride with you because now Merry and Elrond are on my trail trying to press me into tight quarters and stroke my sexiness." They rode off into the night.
BACK IN THE SECLUDED PATH...
...Elrond and Merry were still making love. Contrary to popular belief, they hadn't moved an inch towards Pippin in the last three hours.
ON THE PONY
While riding on Legolas' horse Pixie, Pippin was having regrets about leaving Merry. What if he really did have an inner passion for Merry? Wait this was all wrong. It was Elrond that he had admired for so long. Yes, at night Pippin dreamt of stroking Elrond's eyebrows. Oh those fine hairy caterpillars. "Wait, let me get down," Pippin screamed. Pippin sprinted back to where Elrond and Merry were getting freaky. "NOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO!" Pippin sprinted towards the two snoggers, and tripped. "Damn." Using a Tostido that Pippin pulled from his ocular cavity he quickly leapt atop Merry and began to beat upon Merry's head until Merry's head resembled a squished watermelon.
"Elrond, I love you." Elrond stared at Pippin dumbstruck. "You bastard. You got blood all over my Prada bag." He ran off to trim his eyebrows.
"NoOoOoOoOoOoOoO." Faramir pulled up in his Chevy with Gollum in the front seat sporting the possessed lampshade atop his head.
"Hey Pippin, lets get dirty." And they did.
The End.
Once upon an autumn afternoon, Pippin was taking a lovely stroll with his friend Merry on a secluded path. As they walked along the leave-strewn path, something very touching thing hit Pippin: Merry's hand. And it didn't hit in any old place, oh no. It spanked him hard on the butt. At first, Pippin thought he might try and pretend it never happened, until Merry repeated his gesture in a firmer fashion. Pippin screamed, "Get off me, you pervy molester!" and Merry stood in shock and disbelief. 'But you are the finest hobbit in all of Camelot, Pippin. Let me stroke your elbows, please." At that precise moment, Elrond leapt up out of the shrubbery sporting some Gucci pumps and a coordinating Prada handbag. "Hey guys, you like my new 'rags'?" Elrond asked in a high-pitched voice with an extreme lisp and a feminine touch. Pippin ran for it. Merry started making out with Elrond.
ABOUT THREE HOURS LATER
When Pippin had finally scaled almost three-fourths of Camelot, he ran across a familiar face: Legolas. "Hey Cupid, can you give me a lift on that there pony?" "Cupid?" Legolas asked, apparently offended. "Whatever fairy dust, just let me ride with you because now Merry and Elrond are on my trail trying to press me into tight quarters and stroke my sexiness." They rode off into the night.
BACK IN THE SECLUDED PATH...
...Elrond and Merry were still making love. Contrary to popular belief, they hadn't moved an inch towards Pippin in the last three hours.
ON THE PONY
While riding on Legolas' horse Pixie, Pippin was having regrets about leaving Merry. What if he really did have an inner passion for Merry? Wait this was all wrong. It was Elrond that he had admired for so long. Yes, at night Pippin dreamt of stroking Elrond's eyebrows. Oh those fine hairy caterpillars. "Wait, let me get down," Pippin screamed. Pippin sprinted back to where Elrond and Merry were getting freaky. "NOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO!" Pippin sprinted towards the two snoggers, and tripped. "Damn." Using a Tostido that Pippin pulled from his ocular cavity he quickly leapt atop Merry and began to beat upon Merry's head until Merry's head resembled a squished watermelon.
"Elrond, I love you." Elrond stared at Pippin dumbstruck. "You bastard. You got blood all over my Prada bag." He ran off to trim his eyebrows.
"NoOoOoOoOoOoOoO." Faramir pulled up in his Chevy with Gollum in the front seat sporting the possessed lampshade atop his head.
"Hey Pippin, lets get dirty." And they did.
The End.