Episode 10: Relinquishing Old Feelings (Part 1)

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Note: I based this chapter on my buddy, Aimee =) I LOVE YOU!!

"Well I guess all that's left is this box from the living room."

Marron: Trunks entered the room with a medium sized box. I was lying on my bed as Trunks sat down on the bed beside me putting the box on the floor in front of him and opened it up

"4:12, not bad the room is nice but I'm so tired now."

"Well when you go to bed at 5 and wake up at 9 having only 4 hours of sleep, I glad you haven't fallen asleep on me yet."

I shook my head and smiled "What's in there?" I asked trying to look as I laid there.

"Um…" Trunks pulled out a small pink familiar looking bear and shows it to me

"What's this?"

When I saw what it was I took it from him and hugged it...noticingly enough, it still smelt like him. The scent hit my nose and reminded me of the night he gave it to me. "Aww, so that's where Goten put it. Trunks if you don't remember what this is then I might as well throw it away."

I held the bear by its ear hanging it over the trash. It was a bear Trunks gave to me when we were going out on our first date; 3 years ago, about 6 months before I left for college, I was his girlfriend for almost 3 weeks. Yes I said girlfriend. It was so long ago, but it lasted only so little

"That's what I thought you did with it. Why'd you keep it?"

"I always keep at least one thing from all my ex-boyfriends and well since this was the ONLY thing you ever gave me, I had to keep it."

I held it back in my arms, then he took it from me and looked at it like something was wrong with it

"I really hope you don't think I wanted to give this to you. Goten made me do it."

I stole it back from him

"I know that. You've told me that when you gave it to me, and every time you saw it. Geez, you can't even ACT like you wanted to give it to me."

"Well it's stupid. You think I'm actually going to give a stupid bear to you."

"Yes, I know you wouldn't and that is why I wanted to stop going out with you." I said in a playful voice

"Why? Because I won't give you a bear without someone forcing me?"

"No forget it. It's the past, can't change anything about it now."

"Why won't you tell me?"

"Because it's something that I've learned to let go now. Besides it was over 3 years ago Trunks." I told him as I gave him a smile just to let it go.

"So what 3 years or 30 years, I'd still want to know why you wanted to stop being my girlfriend over a bear."

"It's not about the bear really, it's really just about you."

"So then why don't you tell me."

"It's the past. It won't change anything. You broke up with me and that's that."

"No, tell me... Why did YOU want to break up with me, but let me break up with you first? Please?"

I was reluctant to tell him, I mean why should it matter anyways? "Ok, I'll tell you....from the first day we started going out I wanted to break up with you because you never showed affection toward me, I guess being Vegeta's son I should have known that, but I had faith in you that you would." I let out a small chuckle, "You know you don't only own your father's blood but you also have the caring and loving personality of your mother too...and I believed you'd change everyday I saw you."

We continued speaking in playful voices

"Well, that's why I broke up with you, it was weird. I didn't think you liked me like that so when you asked me out I was surprised. So it was awkward for me to think of you in that kind of way back then. I felt weird and uncomfortable around you as a boyfriend."

"Why?"

"I just wasn't all that comfortable doing boyfriend things around you. I still saw you as this little girl without a nose that Goten and I used to play with."

"Well it's not like you had any girlfriends before me."

"Yes, I have."

"No Trunks, I mean as in more than a one date thing that Goten sets you up with. I mean like making it last, like you and I. For almost 3 weeks I was your girlfriend. An ACTUAL girlfriend. But as we were going out I felt like I was the only one doing all the things any other girlfriend would do, while YOU didn't initiate any kind of affection to show I was your girlfriend. You acted like I was still only a friend."

"No I did, that time we all went to the beach and watched the sunset with Goten and that one girl he was with."

"That was THE ONLY time, which was one of the highlights in our relationship."

"Yeah, see I did show affection then."

"But the next day you played it off as if it never happened. I remember talking to you about it. You promised me that night, you would change, but you didn't. For once in my life a guy put me in the worst mood ever, that whole day I didn't want to speak to you or anyone! I couldn't concentrate on school that day, if someone asked I didn't want to say anything. I even cried that night, and I never cried about any boyfriend before. I just had so much faith in you that it just backfired."

I could feel Trunks continuing to listen carefully as he watched me talk looking at the bear instead of at him. For once in my life I told him how I felt, letting everything out…

"I didn't want to call you, talk to you, or be anywhere around you for the rest of the week, but later that night I realized how ridiculous I was being because I knew you wouldn't change, that's when I called you and told you how I felt that day. The next day I ignored you because of it, then you actually apologized and promised to be a better boyfriend. Again I believed you, and you DID do better for THAT DAY, the next day I knew it could go one of 2 ways, you either do become an actual boyfriend, or you stay the same as before. And so the next day you stayed the same as before, I was mad trust me, but not as much as before, because I saw it coming this time. A while after that, you broke up with me."

It was silent for a while...I don't think he's ever seen me open up to him like this before...letting my feeling out about something so long ago... but I knew he heard EVERY word of it because he was speechless... It didn't matter to me, it was something I learned to let go years ago, but letting him know...it was like FINALLY you know how I feel or felt. Just then he looked at me with guilt in his eyes...

 "I'm sorry"

I shook my head and continued petting the bear, the past was the past, he can't change that now "Whatever."

He pulled me up from where I was lying by my arms and hugged me "No really, I'm sorry. I didn't know you really felt that way. I'm sorry. I really am."

I continued holding what was left of that relationship, the bear, making no hugging response back. I guess I had that much faith in believing you'd make a really good boyfriend if you were more compassionate, Oh well… "It's ok, it's the past now, we can't change it. What happened happened. I've learned from it and I'm over it now, trust me."

He let me go as I laid back down on the bed "So what else is in there?"

"Photo albums and books I guess." He pulled out a green photo album and began to open it when I placed my hand on the cover and shut it.

"Um, don't look at that one."

"Why not?"

"Just…it's just I don't want you to ok" I said in a serious tone. I tried pulling it away until he placed his hand on mine

"What could be in here that would be so bad? It's not like it's your diary because that's smaller." He said trying to cheer me up

"There's just something in it I don't want you to see ok" I forcefully pulled it away from him and threw it to the wall, falling on the floor. "It's a stupid photo album anyways."  

I glared at the album for a second then turned my attention back to Trunks with a normal look as if nothing happened "So what else is in there?"

"Why don't you want me to look at it?"

I let out a big sigh as I sat up next to Trunks with my head down and my hands clamped together. I looked at Trunks; his eyes were piercing through me with his eyebrows crunched down as he looked at me I knew he was full of concern and wanted to know. I couldn't stand looking at his piercing blue eyes anymore as I turned my head looking at the ground then moving my eyes as I stared at the green photo album that laid by the wall. It's time, I have to tell him, I can't keep this going any longer. Now is the best time. Goten said when the time is right tell him. It's the perfect time to bring this up. I hate this. I hate me. I hate HIM. As I looked at the photo album next to the wall. All these emotions began haunting me again, I didn't want to rehash these feelings again, but I could feel it taking over my mind! I shut my eyes; trying to hold the tears that were about to fall, turning my head away hoping Trunks wouldn't see.