PART TWO- HEADLINES
*Yusuke Jack swings on the gate as it opens up for the newsies.*
Yusuke Jack: Whee!
Racetrack Soujiro: I love ya! That was better'n yesterday! *giggles*
Yusuke Jack: You're too kind.
Oscar Togoro: We'll get ya tomorrow, Detective Boy.
*Yusuke Jack rings a little bell and leans against the grate.*
Yusuke Jack: Mistah WEEEEEAAAAAseeeeeeel!
Ominous Voice: I'm coming.
*The Bishonen Newsies gulp in fear. The shutters open, but no one appears.*
Ominous Voice: Eh.wasn't the prop boy supposed to get me a stool to stand on?
*Goku the prop boy dashes in and sets a stool down.*
Ominous voice: Thanks, idiot.
*The speaker is revealed to be.Genkai.*
Yusuke Jack: Tee hee hee.Genkai!!!!
Mush Sano: Hey, wouldn't Misao make a better Weasel?
Misao: *Biiiiida face.*
Just go on with the scene.
Yusuke Jack: Hey, Weasel.
Genkai the Weasel: Told you a million times, numbskull. The name is Wiesel. Mister- Mrs. Miss Wiesel to you. How many?
Yusuke Jack: Don't rush me. I'm perusing the merchandise, Miss Weasel.
*Snicker, snicker, laugh, laugh.*
Yusuke Jack: Hunnert papes.
Genkai the Weasel: Hundred papes for the wise guy.
*Yusuke Jack takes his papers and sits down. Soujiro Racetrack steps up.*
Soujiro Racetrack: Good Morning!!!! Listen, I seem to be short on cash, so could you lend me some money, pretty please? *leans in* I got a hot tip on the upcoming duel. It won't waste your money. *giggles.*
Genkai the Weasel: Sure thing?
Soujiro Racetrack: Oh, yes. Very sure thing. Not like last time.
Genkai the Weasel: Yeah? Well then, a hundred papes.
*Soujiro Racetrack sits down next to Yusuke Jack and opens a paper.*
Soujiro Racetrack: Hey, there was an infant born with two heads. *giggles* It must be from Funbari Hill.
*David Kurama and Yahiko Les step up.*
David Kurama: Twenty papers, please. *gorgeous grin*
Genkai the Weasel: Can it.
*David Kurama counts through his papers and frowns.*
David Kurama: There must be some mistake, ma'am. I paid for twenty, but I only got nineteen.
Genkai the Weasel: You gotta problem with that, pretty boy?
*Yusuke Jack, seeing that David Kurama is in over his head, jumps up and rifles through the stack of papers.*
Yusuke Jack: It's only nineteen, Weasel. Nineteen. But don't worry about it. It's an honest mistake. I mean, Morris here can only count to twenty with his shoes on.
Morris Togoro: *iflookscouldkill.*
Yusuke Jack: Tell ya what. Another fiddy for my friend here.
David Kurama: You do mean fifty, don't you?
Genkai the Weasel: Here ya go. Fifty papes. Now beat it.
*Yusuke Jack lopes off. David Kurama follows, Yahiko Les still trailing behind him.*
David Kurama: I don't want your papers. I don't take charity from anyone, I don't know you, I don't care to, so here are your papes.
*David Kurama pokes Yahiko Les. Yahiko Les glowers. David Kurama reaches for the rose in his hair.*
Yahiko Les: Detective Boy. They called him Detective Boy.
Yusuke Jack: Yeah, that and a whole lot of other things, including Yusuke Jack, which is what my mother calls me. And what do they call you, kid?
Yahiko Les: I'M NOT A KID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But they call me Yahiko Les. And this is my brother David Kurama. He's older. BUT ONLY BY FIVE YEARS!!!!!!!
Yusuke Jack: *counting on his fingers* Eh, so how old are you, kid?
Yahiko Les: I'M NOT A LITTLE KID!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But I'm near eleven.
David Kurama: He's ten.
Yahiko Les: *glowerglareglower*
Yusuke Jack: Eh, that's no good. Pretend to be seven. Younger sells more papes. That's why Koenma Boots here somehow gets the Employee of the Month badge every stinkin' time.
Koenma Boots: *beaming*
Yusuke Jack: But anyway, if we're gonna be partners, we've gotta be the best-
David Kurama: PARTNERS?!?!?!?!
Yusuke Jack: Well, you owe me for all them papes, right?
David Kurama: *nods*
Yusuke: We can sell and split seventy-thirty, and you get the privilege and honor of working with ME for nothing.
David Kurama: *funny little snorting laugh.*
Yusuke Jack: *mimics funny little snorting laugh.*
David Kurama: *looks perturbed.*
Crutchy Yugi: You're getting the chance of a lifetime here, Davey. Ya learn from Yusuke Jack, you learn from the best.
Bumlets Yoh: THE BEST! *huge smile.* I SAID MY LINE!!! I SAID MY LINE!!!!
Anna: *pats his head.* That's my cute little bishie!!! *kiss kiss*
Snitch Manta: That is so pathetic.
David Kurama: If he's so good, how come he needs me? Is it just my charm and good looks?
Bishie Newsies: *collective ooh*
Yusuke Jack: Listen, I don't need you, pal. But with this kid's puss, and my God-given talent, we could be moving a thousand papes a week. So whaddaya say, Yahiko Les-kun? Ya wanna sell papes with me?
Yahiko Les: YAY FOR -KUN!!!! YES!!!
David Kurama: Hold it. It must be at least fifty-fifty.
Yusuke Jack: *pauses.* Sixty-forty, I forget the whole thing.
*David Kurama looks a tad reluctant, but holds out his hand to shake. Yusuke Jack hocks a loogie in his hand and tries to shake, but David Kurama pulls back.*
Yusuke Jack: 'Smattah?
David Kurama: *twitches* That's DISGUSTING!!! Kaa'san would never allow it.
Specs Naruto: I wish I had a mother. Cry, cry.
Yusuke Jack: Name of the game is volume, Davey. You only took twenty papes. Why?
David Kurama: Bad headline. What is with these people and Sandland?!?!
Yusuke Jack: That's the first thing you gotta learn. Manga doesn't sell papes, hot bishie newsies sell papes. Without newsies, nobody knows nothing.
*Yukina walks by, singing happily to herself.*
Mush Sano: Woo!!! I'm in heaven!!!
Kuwabara Skittery: *droolydrooly.*
Hiei: GAAAAUUGGGHH!!!!!!!
*Hiei takes his cane back from Misao and beats Sano and Kuwa-kun.*
Yukina: *blushes.* Hiei-san, thank you for saving me.
Hiei: Well, I had to. I mean, after all, I am your-
OKAY!!!!!!!!! COMMERCIAL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Raven's Herbal Teas!!! Guaranteed to make even the most hyperactive person depressed and meditative!!!
*Starfire takes a big swig.*
Starfire: I hate life. Life hates me. I have no friends. *shakes fist at the sun.* STOP MOCKING ME!!!
Raven: Take it from me. It will change your whole outlook on life.
RAVEN'S HERBAL TEAS!!! Now in blackberry, blueberry, and kumquat flavors.
*Yusuke Jack swings on the gate as it opens up for the newsies.*
Yusuke Jack: Whee!
Racetrack Soujiro: I love ya! That was better'n yesterday! *giggles*
Yusuke Jack: You're too kind.
Oscar Togoro: We'll get ya tomorrow, Detective Boy.
*Yusuke Jack rings a little bell and leans against the grate.*
Yusuke Jack: Mistah WEEEEEAAAAAseeeeeeel!
Ominous Voice: I'm coming.
*The Bishonen Newsies gulp in fear. The shutters open, but no one appears.*
Ominous Voice: Eh.wasn't the prop boy supposed to get me a stool to stand on?
*Goku the prop boy dashes in and sets a stool down.*
Ominous voice: Thanks, idiot.
*The speaker is revealed to be.Genkai.*
Yusuke Jack: Tee hee hee.Genkai!!!!
Mush Sano: Hey, wouldn't Misao make a better Weasel?
Misao: *Biiiiida face.*
Just go on with the scene.
Yusuke Jack: Hey, Weasel.
Genkai the Weasel: Told you a million times, numbskull. The name is Wiesel. Mister- Mrs. Miss Wiesel to you. How many?
Yusuke Jack: Don't rush me. I'm perusing the merchandise, Miss Weasel.
*Snicker, snicker, laugh, laugh.*
Yusuke Jack: Hunnert papes.
Genkai the Weasel: Hundred papes for the wise guy.
*Yusuke Jack takes his papers and sits down. Soujiro Racetrack steps up.*
Soujiro Racetrack: Good Morning!!!! Listen, I seem to be short on cash, so could you lend me some money, pretty please? *leans in* I got a hot tip on the upcoming duel. It won't waste your money. *giggles.*
Genkai the Weasel: Sure thing?
Soujiro Racetrack: Oh, yes. Very sure thing. Not like last time.
Genkai the Weasel: Yeah? Well then, a hundred papes.
*Soujiro Racetrack sits down next to Yusuke Jack and opens a paper.*
Soujiro Racetrack: Hey, there was an infant born with two heads. *giggles* It must be from Funbari Hill.
*David Kurama and Yahiko Les step up.*
David Kurama: Twenty papers, please. *gorgeous grin*
Genkai the Weasel: Can it.
*David Kurama counts through his papers and frowns.*
David Kurama: There must be some mistake, ma'am. I paid for twenty, but I only got nineteen.
Genkai the Weasel: You gotta problem with that, pretty boy?
*Yusuke Jack, seeing that David Kurama is in over his head, jumps up and rifles through the stack of papers.*
Yusuke Jack: It's only nineteen, Weasel. Nineteen. But don't worry about it. It's an honest mistake. I mean, Morris here can only count to twenty with his shoes on.
Morris Togoro: *iflookscouldkill.*
Yusuke Jack: Tell ya what. Another fiddy for my friend here.
David Kurama: You do mean fifty, don't you?
Genkai the Weasel: Here ya go. Fifty papes. Now beat it.
*Yusuke Jack lopes off. David Kurama follows, Yahiko Les still trailing behind him.*
David Kurama: I don't want your papers. I don't take charity from anyone, I don't know you, I don't care to, so here are your papes.
*David Kurama pokes Yahiko Les. Yahiko Les glowers. David Kurama reaches for the rose in his hair.*
Yahiko Les: Detective Boy. They called him Detective Boy.
Yusuke Jack: Yeah, that and a whole lot of other things, including Yusuke Jack, which is what my mother calls me. And what do they call you, kid?
Yahiko Les: I'M NOT A KID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But they call me Yahiko Les. And this is my brother David Kurama. He's older. BUT ONLY BY FIVE YEARS!!!!!!!
Yusuke Jack: *counting on his fingers* Eh, so how old are you, kid?
Yahiko Les: I'M NOT A LITTLE KID!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But I'm near eleven.
David Kurama: He's ten.
Yahiko Les: *glowerglareglower*
Yusuke Jack: Eh, that's no good. Pretend to be seven. Younger sells more papes. That's why Koenma Boots here somehow gets the Employee of the Month badge every stinkin' time.
Koenma Boots: *beaming*
Yusuke Jack: But anyway, if we're gonna be partners, we've gotta be the best-
David Kurama: PARTNERS?!?!?!?!
Yusuke Jack: Well, you owe me for all them papes, right?
David Kurama: *nods*
Yusuke: We can sell and split seventy-thirty, and you get the privilege and honor of working with ME for nothing.
David Kurama: *funny little snorting laugh.*
Yusuke Jack: *mimics funny little snorting laugh.*
David Kurama: *looks perturbed.*
Crutchy Yugi: You're getting the chance of a lifetime here, Davey. Ya learn from Yusuke Jack, you learn from the best.
Bumlets Yoh: THE BEST! *huge smile.* I SAID MY LINE!!! I SAID MY LINE!!!!
Anna: *pats his head.* That's my cute little bishie!!! *kiss kiss*
Snitch Manta: That is so pathetic.
David Kurama: If he's so good, how come he needs me? Is it just my charm and good looks?
Bishie Newsies: *collective ooh*
Yusuke Jack: Listen, I don't need you, pal. But with this kid's puss, and my God-given talent, we could be moving a thousand papes a week. So whaddaya say, Yahiko Les-kun? Ya wanna sell papes with me?
Yahiko Les: YAY FOR -KUN!!!! YES!!!
David Kurama: Hold it. It must be at least fifty-fifty.
Yusuke Jack: *pauses.* Sixty-forty, I forget the whole thing.
*David Kurama looks a tad reluctant, but holds out his hand to shake. Yusuke Jack hocks a loogie in his hand and tries to shake, but David Kurama pulls back.*
Yusuke Jack: 'Smattah?
David Kurama: *twitches* That's DISGUSTING!!! Kaa'san would never allow it.
Specs Naruto: I wish I had a mother. Cry, cry.
Yusuke Jack: Name of the game is volume, Davey. You only took twenty papes. Why?
David Kurama: Bad headline. What is with these people and Sandland?!?!
Yusuke Jack: That's the first thing you gotta learn. Manga doesn't sell papes, hot bishie newsies sell papes. Without newsies, nobody knows nothing.
*Yukina walks by, singing happily to herself.*
Mush Sano: Woo!!! I'm in heaven!!!
Kuwabara Skittery: *droolydrooly.*
Hiei: GAAAAUUGGGHH!!!!!!!
*Hiei takes his cane back from Misao and beats Sano and Kuwa-kun.*
Yukina: *blushes.* Hiei-san, thank you for saving me.
Hiei: Well, I had to. I mean, after all, I am your-
OKAY!!!!!!!!! COMMERCIAL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Raven's Herbal Teas!!! Guaranteed to make even the most hyperactive person depressed and meditative!!!
*Starfire takes a big swig.*
Starfire: I hate life. Life hates me. I have no friends. *shakes fist at the sun.* STOP MOCKING ME!!!
Raven: Take it from me. It will change your whole outlook on life.
RAVEN'S HERBAL TEAS!!! Now in blackberry, blueberry, and kumquat flavors.