Hypocrites Always Fall in Love

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this (except most of the plot, and the characters you don't recognize). It all belongs to the amazing J.K. Rowling.

Here's another chapter…Sorry it took so long. But I will (just to let you know) be taking a little break from this story I think…just for a little while. I should (at least) have more chapters for you by mid-June, if not before. Thanks for the reviews, and I hope you enjoy this chapter.

-Kait

Chapter 14- Broom Closets and Trick Doors

"Are you ready?"

It was Sunday evening and Lily and James were sitting with Remus and Sirius in the common room. Catalina and Lexy had already settled on going to bed, mainly for Lexy's comment on needing "beauty rest." The others huddled around the fire in their respective armchairs trying to look busy with work and keep warm. Lily had taken to wrapping herself up in a blanket while the other three managed to appear like they were working studiously on school work and essays. Three scratching quills was almost enough to drive Lily mad...but she sustained her composure by re-evaluating their plan of the night for the hundredth time.

"What?" Lily mumbled dazed from her thoughts and glanced over at Sirius, who had addressed her, "Oh, yes...Of course."

"This is a monumental event of some sort," James said, marveling in late hour and the perfect plan they had concocted. "Our first practical joke at Hogwarts… Who would have thought?"

"We've been whispering and planning for the past day," Remus grinned, "Oh no, I never thought I would see it happen."

There were a few laughs and smiles exchanged, but they soon went back to sitting and writing in silence.

Would it work? Lily had been wondering that for the past day. She was not exactly an expert on ghosts and what they were susceptible to. And how did they know that Peeves wouldn't retaliate? And that the way he got them back would be worse, much worse than eggs...

But as long as they kept quiet and Peeves never realized who they were...Perhaps he would never find out and then they would get off. Somehow, it did not seem likely...

Still, it seemed fairly just to say that Lily deserved to play a little joke on Peeves. After what he had done to her bag, it just seemed only fair.

She glanced down at her watch briefly to see how much time had passed. They couldn't be out too late for this since they did, after all, have classes in the morning.

"It's twelve!" She hissed to the others as she threw the blanket off herself and onto the chair.

James stretched a bit and yawned while Sirius, next to him, mumbled, "Well, it's about time."

"You have got to learn patience," James said with a smirk and tossed his parchment and quill in the corner, "Besides, this will be fun."

Remus placed his own books carefully under his armchair so no one would spot them. "You are one to talk about patience, James," he said in a hushed tone as he knelt down, "This morning you were on about how long it takes Sirius to take a shower."

"Well, a person should not be in the bathroom for more than twenty minutes. Nothing will ever justify that."

"Just wait James. In two years you'll be the one taking forever I bet," Sirius said defiantly and went towards the door, where Lily happened to be standing and motioning for them to start moving. In this century.

"Come'on," she whispered in a whiny voice, "Argue later about rubbish, let's get Peeves now."

As she ushered the unnaturally silenced boys out of the Common Room, she found herself murmuring her thoughts aloud.

"Now to go and find Peeves..."

----------------------------

To Lily's amazement, locating Peeves in the vacant corridors wasn't the hard part of the plan...They found him quite easily, actually. He could be heard crackling and playing jokes on the enchanted suits of armor, who in turn were attempting to swat him away. The only problem was that they could never quite reach him, as his being a ghost gave him the advantage of flying right through things.

"So what do we do now?" Lily asked in a whisper once the four of them had stopped and perched behind a staircase.

James looked at her in bewilderment. "I thought you had that under control."

A number of quiet groans and mumblings were to be heard through the hall. They didn't realize exactly how loud until Peeves stopped reeking havoc on the armor to float just a few inches away from them to see what the noise was all about.

"Have we got some ickle firsties hiding up the staircase, just waiting for me? I suppose we shall see...Here firstie, firstie...Here kids...," he whispered with an evil grin illuminating the corridor as he practically crept up the staircase.

Remus quickly spoke up in the silence. "There," he said hoarsely and pointed behind them, almost making the others jump out of their skin, "Into that broom closet over there until Peeve's suspicions wear off."

The group quickly followed Remus into the closet as quietly as humanly possible. Lily was pushed in first, followed by the pusher (Sirius), then James and finally Remus. The door closed with a thud.

"Let's hope he didn't hear that," Lily whispered as Remus put his ear to door to listen more closely.

"James! You're on my leg," Sirius whined, "Get off!"

"I would, if Remus would move off my foot," he shot back, glaring into the darkness in a direction that he guessed Remus to be.

Remus slid away from the door and up off of James only to land on someone else.

"Remus...," Lily hissed in pain and bit her lip to control herself from yelling in anguish.

"Sorry," he mumbled and moved into the corner while batting away musty cobwebs.

The four were silenced for a few moments as they got themselves situated and moved to their respective corners so no one was sitting on any part of anyone else.

"So what do we do now?" Lily asked as Remus pressed his ear against the door again.

"Nothing, I'd say," James murmured, and said a spell to light his wand so they could see.

Remus smiled at him in agreement. "That's exactly right. We should probably wait a few minutes before going back out there."

Sirius looked a bit confused by this and made no effort to hide this. "Here's my question. Once we get out there, how are we going to distract Peeves so we can do this thing?"

The other three shared a quizzical glance as they went deep into thought. A moment or two passed by before Lily spoke up.

"I think I read about something that might help us," she whispered and looked around, "In Hogwarts: A History."
"You actually read that?" Sirius said incredulously, his eyes as big as saucers.

"Hey," James hoarsely whispered in her defense, "I've read it too!"

Remus and Sirius simply gave him this look of huge disbelief. James was just lucky the closet was nearly pitch-black, that way no one noticed him blushing furiously.

"Er...well, my mom... made me," he finished lamely.

"Right."

"Whatever you say, mate," Sirius grinned, holding back a laugh but failing miserably.

"Let's just go," James grumbled. "Nox."

He pushed open the door in anxiousness. He just wanted to get out of there, he didn't care if there was anyone outside or not.

Fortunately, there was no one in the hallway or on the staircase. No one spotted them.

"Hey, wait," Lily said, scrambling out of the closet after the others, "You didn't hear my plan."

"Whatever it is," James said casting a glance at her, "I'm sure it's brilliant. Just lead us to where ever your plan starts."

She proceeded in giving him a very odd look and smoothed out her pajamas. "Alright, but it's hard to find the room."

"What room?" he asked. Remus and Sirius appeared to be just as perplexed as he and stopped in their tracks.

"The room we need," she replied, waving her hands vaguely. "It only appears when you need it too."

"Well that's convenient, eh?" Sirius said with a grin.

Remus threw up his hands. "We could be left searching for hours."

Lily smiled and started down a corridor. "And I'm bad with directions. But this would suck all the fun out of it."

The boys followed her in curiosity and so that they wouldn't get lost.

"Well that's reassuring," Remus muttered to James.

"I think she's gone crazy," Sirius murmured, glancing around at the torch lights the knights of armor seemed to be holding. And very life-like, too.

"What other choice do we have?" James said with a grin and sped up to keep up with her.

The Gryffindor first years crept along the corridors in silence after that. Sirius was easily assigned the task of trailing behind so that he could make sure no one saw them or managed to follow them around (He was the most alert at that hour).

Lily looked around nervously as she led the group quickly around the school. They narrowly escaped McGonagall at one point, when it seemed like she was where ever then turned. Luckily, Sirius spotted her before she spotted them and James had enough sense to grab Lily by the wrist and guide her to gap behind the statue of Gergory the Smarmy and the stone wall.

"Where are you going to go then?" She hissed as he frantically looked for another hiding place.

He moved around in helplessness and finally stopped in front of Lily and the statue.

"Move over," James whispered, his voice hoarse. "Quick!"

Lily didn't even have time to protest, as James squeezed his way behind the statue. She just moved over and tried to make as much room as she could.

"Lower your head for a bit," James mumbled as he watched McGonagall walking closer to them.

Lily's heart was pounding…She had never really done anything like this before. Back at her muggle school, she never pulled anything or played jokes on anyone. So she was terrified. Incredibly terrified…she had never felt so exposed. If Professor McGonagall managed to see them, what would happen? How much trouble could they get into? Lily was sure that whatever happened, it wouldn't be good.

She did what James told her as McGonagall quickly approached.

And she could have sworn that Professor McGonagall looked right at them as she went about putting out most of the lights. Or looked right at the statue, rather…

But she continued to stroll down the corridor…like she had only seen the statue and had not noticed them at all. It was unnerving for Lily.

After a few moments passed, James carefully lifted his head up and craned his neck over the statue's shoulders to make sure it was okay to move.

"Clear," he whispered and stealthily squeezed himself from out behind Gergory the Smarmy.

Unfortunately, his landing wasn't as polished as he thought it was going to be. He ended up tripping off the base of the statue and almost hitting the floor painfully before he managed to catch himself.

"Well that was quite graceful," Lily giggled while stepping down from the statue's base.

"Bet you can't trip like that," James shot back, trying to challenge her as he gained control of his wobbly ankles.

"I can only imagine that you will have your revenge some day," she said slyly and glanced around, "Where did Sirius and Remus run off to?"

James looked around with her as he brushed off his pajamas in case of any dirt or dust. Lily examined the area around another statue and still could not find them. She was beginning to feel anxious…What if McGonagall had caught them? And then if she had, when they rat out Lily and James? Highly unlikely…but still…

"I'm going to check for them on the next floor, okay?" He whispered to Lily as he started for the staircase.

"James," she called in a hushed voice as he began to slink his way up the stairs, "Be careful!"

He just nodded mutely and continued up. As he disappeared to the corridor on the next floor, Lily occupied her time with attempting to find the boys in this hallway. She searched a few vacant classrooms and happened to be in one when she heard a noise from the stairs.

"Lily," she heard a hoarse mumble as she started for the doorway. "Lily…," It called again from the dark corridor.

Suddenly Lily noticed just how little torchlight actually lit up the hallway…And as she stuck her head out of the door frame cautiously, she felt complied to lock the door right then and there.

…But there was something in their voice, something she seemed to know…felt a connection to…

She quickly snuck out of the empty classroom and stood near the staircase she had watched James walk up just a mere fifteen seconds earlier.

"James?" She whispered. Her voice was barely audible; since she could not be completely sure it was him she was talking to.

"Lily?"

Hmmm. So it was James…

She began to walk in the direction of his voice. She felt blind as she cautiously took steps forward and silently cursed Professor McGonagall for extinguishing the hall lights. Then, of course, she took it back because you can't go wishing rotten things on a teacher…even if they don't know it.

"Yeah?"

He was getting closer…She could almost see him now.

"I found the other two," James said with a quick laugh. "Sirius seemed to knock right into a door he claimed was a wall when he saw it."

Lily could see the funny smirk on his face at the tip of the stairs.

"That was no wall!" She exclaimed, just as James put a finger to his lips to quiet her, "That was the Room of Requirement!"

"Oh, so it pops out of nowhere, eh?"

Lily gave him a quizzical look. "Not exactly... Like I said before, it only 'pops out of nowhere' when you need a place to hide and things like that."

"Well that's pretty cool," he commented and started to go up the staircase.

"Yeah," Lily murmured sarcastically, "It's amazing, the sort of knowledge you can learn from a book."

He stopped quietly in his tracks and turned around to grin devilishly at her. "That is, if you ever got the urge to pick up such rubbish and actually read it."

-------------------

Remus was looking quite harassed when James and Lily reached him and Sirius. Apparently, he had underestimated Sirius's stupidity, as he put it. Though he was fairly happy that Sirius "stumbled" upon the Room of Requirement, he wasn't very happy when his companion knocked over a case of Filbusters fireworks and water balloons thus causing the state of the room to be disastrous.

"At least that's what we were going to do to the room anyway," Lily responded with a shrug upon seeing the room and watching Remus almost tear all of his mousy brown hair out.

"I suppose," Remus mumbled and closed the door behind the two of them, "But what if someone heard the noise?"

"I doubt it," she replied lightly, "Especially if they haven't come by now."

"Right, of course…," Remus said, regaining his normal calm and collective personality.

Sirius and James, however, got down to business while the other two tried to strategize. They inspected all of the shelved joke devices carefully as to make sure there were no malfunctions. They had to make a mess of this room and the hall around it and it was not going to be easy.

Once they had finished and their companions had planned every last detail, the four Gryffindors quickly got to work. James and Remus took to throwing Filbusters No Heat Fireworks ("completely safe, even for your house-elf") and Ever-bashing Boomerangs before ducking out of the room. Lily assigned herself to toss water balloons down the corridor and splatter water in the most inconvenient places. The other three made sure Sirius got the job of setting of dungbombs through out the corridor and in the room.

"So now how to do get Peeves here?" Remus questioned, holding his nose.

"I know," Sirius chimed in happily, "HEY PEEVES! FIRST YEARS IN THE ROOM OF REQUIREMENT!"

The others gasped in horror. Each had a terrible look on their face, like they wanted to clobber him.

Lily stood in awe herself. She could not believe Sirius had just yelled that for the whole school to know.

"Oh and that's not going to attract any attention!" She exclaimed, in spite of herself.

"You lot," James said hoarsely and with a tone of anxiousness, "(Once you're done arguing) might want to HIDE."

Everyone scrambled around the room, scattering what was left in their hands. But out of nowhere appeared a silvery cloak on one of the vacant armchairs…

"Here…," James hissed and grabbed the cloak on the chair he had just spotted, "Under this!"

"What…?" was Remus's candid reply while Lily also chimed in.

"Yeah…What in bloody hell is that thing?"

James looked around furiously, before responding quickly back. "Just trust me, okay?"

The other two exchanged fast glances as Sirius followed James under the cloak. Remus and Lily reluctantly followed when they began to hear faint footsteps…and suddenly…they weren't visible anymore.

"Wicked!" Sirius said happily and went on grinning.

His companions gave him very "uplifting" glares to tell him to hush up. From then on they stood silently, huddled together, quite simply waiting for the footsteps to draw closer.

But before they did, Peeves entered the room and looked about it with what seemed to be a mischievous, yet honored look.

"Not my work…but not bad all the same…Now come out, come out kiddies!"

Alright, Lily thought, This is good…Peeves is here. The only problem is we weren't supposed to be here while he got caught! What a mess!

If only she could have the chance to kill Sirius right there on the spot…

Unfortunately, there was no time for that. Professor McGonagall had crossed the threshold to the room and saw Peeves standing (or floating, rather) around the disarray of fireworks and water balloons. It was quite the horrifying sight.

"You see, Professor," a voice came from the shadows outside the doorway, "I told you those four were planning on ruining the school property!"

Lidia Rottingham's face was revealed as she stepped forth through the door and into the candlelit room. Her face not only conveyed her snooty appearance but also the shock that replaced a smile to see no one but Peeves at the scene of the crime.

"PEEVES!" McGonagall barked, "You have some explaining to do to Dumbledore when I get done with you!"

"Professor," Peeves crackled, his smile broken, "You are mistaken."

"I most certainly am not," she replied angrily, shaking her finger, "You'll be coming along with me. And you…," she went on, turning to see Lidia still looking shell-shocked, "The fact that you knew about this leads me to believe you had a part in it."

"But Professor," she exclaimed, the smile completely gone from her face, "I had nothing to do with this. I just overheard people talking about it."

Lily and Remus smiled silently with the others as they realized that they might actually be off the hook…