Hey Everyone!!!!!!

Whew! All this posting of stories is hard work indeed.

Okay, I promised you guys (at least the ones who read "The Day the

Scouts Just Couldn't Handle: One Episode of Stars That Will Never Air

In the US *or* Japan") that I would do more funny funny stories to

mix in with the semi-funny/stories that have a plot. Well, here ya

go! I plan to make it an actual series, but I don't know if it's going

to have 2 or 20 parts.

Please Please Please Please Please tell me what you think!!!!

I love hearing from people...

KThai123@home.com

For those of you who care, despite the title, this particular chapter

does not feature the GW boys, but they will enter soon. Unless Saturn

Kills everyone before that can happen. (Te. He.)

Again I hope you guys like.

On with the story.

The Queen has Spoken.

So it is written, so it shall be.

~*~

When the Sailor Senshi Meet the Gundam Wing Boys

and

Everything Goes Frightfully Wrong



Part 1: Getting to the Scene of the Crime

Serena Usagi Tsukino was in one of her most favorite places:

her bed. She was dreaming of her most favorite things: shopping,

eating, and Darien Mamoru Chiba, her current boyfriend and fiance, when

something caused her to wake up. But, being woken up before noon on a

Saturday morning, she didn't yet have enough brainpower to figure out

what it was.

Serena sat up on her elbows. She saw the pink haired girl

appropriately named Chibi Chibi curled up on her side, clutching to

Serena's clothes, and Luna, her black Lunarian cat, sleeping entwined

in her legs, with her claws currently embedded in Serena's calves, and

she was making strange noises as if she were having a bad dream.

Wait.

Claws in calves.

...........

"AHHHHHHHH!" screamed Serena as, miracle of miracles, she

became fully awake at 9:00 a.m. on a Saturday morning. She sprung out

of bed with an agility that would have surprised her friends, causing

both Luna and Chibi Chibi to be catapulted into the air. Chibi Chibi

pulled an umbrella out of god knows where, leisurely opened it, and

floated safely to the ground, while Luna smashed into a nearby wall.

Serena's mother burst into the room to see what was wrong.

"Mommy, look," said Serena pitifully indicating the perfect

half-moon grouping of claw marks. Tears filled her eyes, and her lower

lip trembled.

"Three, two," counted Luna quietly as she slid down the wall to

end up in a heap on the ground. "One."

"WAHHHHHHHHHHH!" cried Serena as a flood of tears began to flow

from her eyes. Miraculously, the room did not get flooded, but

Serena's mom did get drenched while she bandaged up her daughter. When

it was all done, Serena looked down at her neatly bandaged calves, and

turned her crying off with that magical switch, (which no one to date

had been able to locate). She smiled brilliantly at her mother.

"Thanks Mom!" she said.

Her mother nodded and walked out of the room. It was very

lucky that she could read lips because being in such close contact with

Serena while she wailed had caused her to temporarily lose her hearing.

When the door was securely shut, Serena turned angry eyes to

the newly wall-smashed cat. "Luna, I can't believe you did that!" she

exclaimed.

Luna smiled dazedly at Serena. "Muffins, munchies, and mice

make all the world seem so nice!" she babbled, her little kitty eyes

beady and unfocused.

Serena just rolled her eyes at the fallen cat. "Get up already

Luna. Jeez, even your whiskers are crooked," commented Serena.

Luna shook her head and got shakily to her feet. She glared

back at Serena. "Well they wouldn't be if you hadn't launched me into

the air!" she said indignantly.

Serena just stuck her nose high in the air. "Well, Chibi Chibi

was launched into the air and she's not talking about muffins, munchies,

and mice."

The fur on Luna's back began to rise. "Well I'm sorry but I'm

not *special* enough that I can pull magical umbrellas out of my arse!"

Chibi Chibi put a finger on her chin and blinked. "Chibi Chibi,

magical arse, Chibi Chibi?" she asked, cocking her head just a little

to the side. Chibi Chibi was a little girl about a foot tall with

bright pink hair wrapped in twin buns in the shape of hearts with little

spirals coming out, and bright blue eyes that took up almost her entire

face.

Serena put her hands over the smaller girl's ears. "See what

you did Luna! Teaching her bad words. You should be ashamed of

yourself! And besides, it's ass, not arse."

"First of all you are not the one to be teaching grammar, and

second, at least I'm not teaching her bad habits, which is *all* you

seem to do."

"Ingrate!" screamed Serena.

"Cream puff!" shot back Luna.

They went on like that for some time until they finally heard

a very incessant beeping.

"Do you hear that?" asked Luna in her curiously strong British

accent.

"Yeah, but where is it coming from?" asked Serena. Their fight

forgotten, they searched the room from top to bottom. Chibi Chibi

obligingly threw clothes and objects around as if she was helping,

actually breaking some in the process, but at least she did it

"cutely". Though the trio combed the room, their efforts were all to

no avail. Every time they thought they were close to the beeping, it

mysteriously relocated itself.

"That's it, I give up!" exclaimed Serena. They had been

searching for a total of five minutes. Serena rolled her azure eyes

and shook her head. "Oh well, I suppose if we don't find it then we

weren't meant to find it," she said and yawned. Just then Chibi Chibi

randomly ran over to her, jumped into her lap, and fell fast asleep.

That was when Serena noticed the beeping had gotten significantly

louder. She looked down, and her eyes got very wide. "Uh, Luna, I

think I found my communicator," she said hesitantly.

Luna jumped up from the catnap she had just taken, instantly

awake. "Well then, where is it?" she asked.

With a bemused face she pointed to the sleeping figure of Chibi

Chibi.

"Let's search her then," said Luna.

"But she's sleeping!" exclaimed Serena.

"Oh for heaven's sake," said Luna as she rolled her eyes. "I

know you don't want to answer the damn thing, but stop giving stupid

excuses. Just pick her up and search her clothes. It's not as if it's

that small. We should find it fairly fast."

Ten minutes later they had searched Chibi Chibi all over with

nothing to show for it. To make matters worse Chibi Chibi was still

beeping that continuous, annoying, beep, beep, beep, though Chibi Chibi

herself didn't seem to be bothered by it in the least.

"Wait a minute," said Serena. In a rare moment of insight, the

elder girl picked up the small pink haired girl and held her up to her

ear. Serena listened for only a moment, and then her eyes got even

rounder, and her mouth made a perfect O.

"What is it, Serena?" asked Luna, a sinking feeling in her

little feline tummy.

"My communicator isn't *on* her, it's *in* her," said Serena.

"Oh, bloody hell," said Luna in her crisp, upper crust British

accent. Somehow, it was the perfect thing to say at the moment.

The next thirty minutes of Serena and Chibi Chibi's life were

just too horrible to describe, so I won't. Let's just say that it

involved a little coaxing, a lot of laxatives, and a shit load (if

you'll pardon the pun) of disinfectants.

After what seemed like a lifetime later, the communicator was

recovered, and Chibi Chibi was, for the most part, back to her old

self. She sure wouldn't be eating anymore electronic devices of

Serena's, at least for a little while.

As Serena pressed the appropriate button Sailor Mars' face came

into view.

"Sweet Goddess Serena, were the HELL have you been? I know you

like to sleep in but I would have thought the communicator would have

woken you up faster. We're in some damn trouble down here!" cried

Mars. Cuts ran up and down her face, her hair was a mess, and it

looked like her suit was torn.

"I'm sorry Mars, but I had some trouble getting to my

communicator," said Serena sheepishly.

"Well where the HELL was it?" asked Mars.

"Uh, Chibi Chibi swallowed it," said Serena.

Mars just rolled her eyes, shook her head, and her picture

wavered as she shoved the communicator into someone else's hand. "Here.

I just can't handle her anymore," Mars' voice trailed off. A second

later Mercury's head popped into view. She looked even worse than Mars

with multiple cuts on her face and the skin around her right eye puffy

and purple, but curiously already healing.

"Please just get here soon Serena. We really need your help,"

she Mercury, her voice tired.

"Where are you?" asked Serena.

"About two blocks from the arcade. You should be able to spot

us once you get there," said Mercury.

"I'll be there right away!" said Serena. She ran down the

stairs so quickly she knocked her brother over in the process her long

blond pigtails flying after her.

"Where are you going Serena?" called her mom.

"To save the day!" cried Serena. She winced as Luna swiped her

already sore calves. Serena's mom just stared after her daughter with

sad eyes.

"Such a waste of such good speed. She refuses to even try out

for track," she said.

Chibi Chibi had meanwhile just gone out the door after Serena,

following easily with her magical umbrella, floating high above the

populous, navigating the airways with the skill of long borne practice.

Or just pure dumb luck.

Far below her Luna scowled as she ran. It still wasn't her

fault that fault that she couldn't pull magical umbrella's out of her

arse.

~EnD ChApTeR~