Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the other characters, only
Sandra. J.K Rowling owns them.
************************************************************************
Harry looked at her. She could ask him questions a lot of people would love to ask, but instead she asked only silly questions. His first thought about the most beautiful girl he met, was Fleur Delacour, but she was a veela and was born beautiful.
He looked at Sandra again...only this time he stared at her for long time, he hadn't really noticed how beautiful she was.
"You are the most good-looking girl I ever seen in my life", he answered and blushed. "Er...Who killed your parents?" he asked quickly.
"Thanks for thinking I'm the most beautiful girl you've ever seen. But you haven't met my cousin yet. I killed my parents, Harry, I did."
***********************************************************************
Chapter 3. Explanations
Harry stopped walking and looked frantically at her. "You did what?" he asked, barely audibly. He never imagined that Sandra would kill someone.
What if it was all a lie? Maybe Dumbledore didn't send him Sandra, maybe Voldemort had sent her. He took a tight grip around his wand.
"Well, that's two questions but I guess I owe you an explanation or else you would probably think I'm a psycho.
On my thirteenth birthday my mum arranged a surprise party for me. She had invited all of my friends and the rest of the family. Half of the people were muggles.
My mum was an alcoholic and when she got drunk she usually started to hit me for no reason at all... The party had a wonderful start. Everybody was having a great time.
Mother pretended that she had a great time but I knew she wasn't happy at all..." Sandra looked down at the ground.
When she looked at Harry again, he saw her eyes filled with tears.
"The day before the party she had hit me again. She probably felt guilty about hitting me one day before my birthday so she arranged a party. I can sometimes read people's feelings, conscience and mind. My mum knew I could do that and so did the rest of my family. My mum was definitely feeling guilty...
At the end of the party, when almost all of the children were asleep, except me, the grown-ups started to open bottles of wine and alcohol. I couldn't sleep. I had locked myself in the bathroom.
I could hear all of my mum's thoughts in my head. That was the first time I heard thoughts this way. I kept banging my head against the walls, trying to stop the voices in my mind.
In the meantime, my mum was getting much drunker. I wanted it all to stop but I didn't know how to stop it. So I ran away. I know I shouldn't have done that, because I ran into my mother. She was laughing. I thought my head was going to explode. I was screaming inside. No one paid any attention of me.
I couldn't take it anymore. My mum started screaming so loudly I thought I would be deaf forever, but I enjoyed her scream. The voices were starting to fade away. Everybody had stopped doing whatever they were doing and looked at my mother. I had stopped screaming, but my whole body was shaking. People around us had no idea what to do.
Mum fell on the floor and didn't move. She was dead. I had killed her. All I wanted to do was to stop the voices in my head; I never wanted it to go so far. I don't know how I killed her. I just wanted the voices to stop."
Harry saw Sandra's face; it was all full of tears. She turned her back on Harry and continued.
"My dad had died in a car accident when I was four. He went out so he could by me a toy but he never came back. So I couldn't live with him after my mum died. None of my relatives wanted to take me into their homes, who would want a mind-reader in their home?
So the Ministry of Magic in Sweden had me adopted by this old woman named Anita. She is a psychiatrist and a witch. I live with her now; it's been almost three years now. Since the accident at the party, Anita's been training me so I can now control my power." Sandra faced Harry again.
"What can you do with your power?" Harry asked, he had loosened his grip around his wand.
"I can read minds. I can move things with my will and heal people. But I never use this power anymore, only the healing power, that's how I healed your sight. Now Harry, you can not tell anybody what I just have told you. Only you, Dumbledore and Anita know. And the rest of my family."
"I promise", Harry said as he put a comforting hand on Sandra's shoulder. He had completely forgotten about how she had healed his sight. "I guess it is your turn to ask me something", he said then.
"Yes it is. When is your birthday?"
"On the 31st of July", Harry said and wondered why she didn't ask him serious questions.
"Ask something then."
"Why are you asking me so stupid questions while I am asking you serious ones?"
"I don't know. I just don't feel like asking you very personal things. But I will...soon", Sandra said with a bright smile.
Harry eyed her closely. She wasn't what he had expected her to be at all. She had lost her parents too, he was not alone!
"So... I guess I wasn't what you expected me to be", Sandra said, as she had read his thoughts.
"Did you just read my thoughts?" Harry asked quickly.
"Read your thoughts? No, I told you I never use my power. So, Harry, tell me more about your friends."
"OK. Well, I met Ron Weasley on the train to Hogwarts and we became friends right away. He isn't rich, but he wishes that he was. At least he has a family who cares about him, unlike me. I would gladly share all of my gold with the Weasleys', but I know they'd never allow me to. They don't know much about muggles since they're pureblood.
My other friend, Hermione Granger, she comes from a muggle family. She is the first witch in her family, but she is the best at our school. Even though she's muggleborn, she beats everybody in her classes. I wouldn't be surprised if she is reading right now."
Harry then noticed how much he missed Ron and Hermione. He felt a little bad about not writing them as much as usual. "So how about you. Who are your friends?" Harry asked Sandra.
"My friends. Well I don't have any friends. After the accident at the party I forbade myself to get close to anyone. So when I go to school everyday, everyone stay out of my way. They notice that something is wrong with me."
"I want to be your friend, if you allow me to", Harry said softly. "We'd better go home now."
"Do you really want to be my friend?"
"Yes, I would. So, a minute ago, you said that you go to school everyday. Does that mean that you return home everyday?"
"Yeah, I live in a magical area. Well actually, I live in a very little village which has a magical school in the neighborhood. The school is only two minutes from home so it's not far. And the school isn't as big as Hogwarts."
"Oh, I didn't know such schools existed."
"You don't know much then."
"So I guess we should stop this little game we're playing. But first I want you to promise me something. If you want to be my friend, can you promise me that you will not hurt me?"
"Why on earth are you asking me a question like that? Of course I will never hurt you. Friends don't do that."
"Let's just say that if we get close friends, very close, and you hurt me I will become evil. Very evil."
"How evil?" Harry asked slowly.
"Evil enough to kill you", Sandra answered with a sigh. "And can easily misunderstand things. That's why I need you to promise. Your promise will mean a lot to me."
"Sure, I promise I will never hurt you", Harry said after considering a while. Sandra seemed so innocent and vulnerable. Right at that moment he felt like he would do anything for her. He felt sorry for her.
She had lost both of her parents, just like him. She felt guilty about their death, just like him. They had a lot in common. And Harry felt for sure that they had more in common then they thought.
When Sandra and Harry got home, the Dursleys' didn't even ask where they had been and Harry was glad they didn't. Dudley was already asleep since he was supposed to wake up early in the morning the next day.
Harry fell asleep while thinking about Sandra. She was strange, in a weird way, but he liked her to be strange.
He had been so busy with his own problems that he forgot that other people also had problems. He never wrote long letters to his friends and he felt bad about it. But he wasn't in the mood to answer all of the questions they were asking him.
They didn't mention Sirius at all, but Harry knew that they were thinking about it. This summer, he didn't feel like to go over to the Weasleys'. He decided to write a letter, but he fell asleep, with Sandra in his mind, before he had a chance to.
~^~Dream~^~
He looked around. It was dark and cold. He couldn't see a thing. "Hello", he said. "Is anybody here?" he said a little louder.
Nobody answered. It was quite. Why couldn't he see anything? Why was it all dark? Maybe he was blind...? He felt all alone.
He didn't like it. He didn't like the darkness, but suddenly, it started to get brighter. Soon Harry could see where he was. He was standing on a rock. He had a weird feeling.
He felt that if he would go of the rock he would stop existing. But why was he on a rock? He tried to look around, but he couldn't see anything. It was like if he was in a middle of nowhere.
Suddenly, the scar on his forehead burst into pain. He screamed.
~^End of Dream~^~
Harry opens his eyes. But he can't see. It's dark. But then he sees a face. It's a face of a beautiful girl. Harry thinks she looks like an angel. She is wearing a white nightdress and looks breathtakingly beautiful. He can't see her very clearly, but he feels safe with her sin somehow...
"Harry? Are you alright?" the angel asks. Harry smiles stupidly.
"Are you an angel?" he asks.
"Oh my god. You are hurt pretty badly, Harry. I am not an angel. I am Sandra. Sandra Karlstedt. Don't you remember? Do you have amnesia?"
"Sand...oh, yeah, right. I remember now. What are you doing in my room?" Harry mumbled.
"Well it's hard to fall asleep when you're screaming at top of your lungs. What happened? Did you have a nightmare?"
"Yeah, sort of", Harry said slowly while thinking of his dream. What did the dream mean?
"What do you mean with 'sort of'?"
"Well, I don't know if I should call it a nightmare. Sandra, could you please turn the light on?" Harry said.
"What are you talking about Harry? The light is already on. Are you sure you're alright?"
"Yes I am FINE! Except that I can hardly see anything", Harry said. "Can you please heal my sight like you did before?"
"Are you telling me that you can't see a thing?"
"Well I can see a little bit. But it is misty."
"Oh, well I don't understand why you can't see a thing, but I'll try to heal your eyes." Sandra did like the last time.
Harry tried to see what she did, but soon his sight became worse. Now, he couldn't see a thing. It was all dark. Just like in his dream. "S-Sandra? My sight is getting worse. What are you doing?"
"I am trying to heal your sight. Well...I am done now. Can you see now?"
"No. Everything is black. I thought you said that you could heal?"
"I can. But I don't understand why it isn't working right now."
"So are you saying I will have to be blind for...how many days?"
"I don't know. I guess your sight will come sooner or later. We'll just have to wait and see..."
Harry thought about it. Somehow it seemed that his dream and his blindness were connected, but how?
Why couldn't he see anything? And how long would he stay blind? "Sandra...I need to tell you something", he said after a while. He had decided to tell Sandra about his dream.
"What?" Sandra asked and Harry could feel that she sat down on his bed.
"You know that dream I had. Well, you see, in this dream I was standing on a rock. And at first everything was dark then it started to get brighter, but I still couldn't see anything. It was just as if I was in the middle of nowhere. And then, my scar started to hurt, so I screamed."
"Well, it seems as if you're confused and suppressing something. That explains that you were in the middle of nowhere. You feel like you can't talk to anybody that you are all alone, that explains the rock and the loneliness you felt. Am I correct?" Sandra said quickly.
"I guess if you live with a psychiatrist you learn a lot", Harry said.
"So do you mean that what I said was correct?" Sandra asked softly.
"Yes, you were. Nobody knows how I feel", Harry said in a whisper. He didn't really know why he opened up for Sandra. "I don't want to talk about it, though."
"That's alright. You can talk about it when you are ready. I am not going to put any pressure on you."
"Thanks."
"I'd better go now", Sandra said, but she was still sitting on his bed. Harry could feel her bending down over him and he could feel her soft lips against his. He liked it, her lips tasted like strawberry.
Sandra pulled away and Harry heard how she walked towards the door and walked out of his room.
Fifteen minutes later she came back and kneeled down by his bed. She looked at him. "Harry", she whispered. "You are not alone. I know exactly how you feel. We're in the same boat." It was too bad that Harry couldn't hear her he was already asleep.
************************************************************************
Harry looked at her. She could ask him questions a lot of people would love to ask, but instead she asked only silly questions. His first thought about the most beautiful girl he met, was Fleur Delacour, but she was a veela and was born beautiful.
He looked at Sandra again...only this time he stared at her for long time, he hadn't really noticed how beautiful she was.
"You are the most good-looking girl I ever seen in my life", he answered and blushed. "Er...Who killed your parents?" he asked quickly.
"Thanks for thinking I'm the most beautiful girl you've ever seen. But you haven't met my cousin yet. I killed my parents, Harry, I did."
***********************************************************************
Chapter 3. Explanations
Harry stopped walking and looked frantically at her. "You did what?" he asked, barely audibly. He never imagined that Sandra would kill someone.
What if it was all a lie? Maybe Dumbledore didn't send him Sandra, maybe Voldemort had sent her. He took a tight grip around his wand.
"Well, that's two questions but I guess I owe you an explanation or else you would probably think I'm a psycho.
On my thirteenth birthday my mum arranged a surprise party for me. She had invited all of my friends and the rest of the family. Half of the people were muggles.
My mum was an alcoholic and when she got drunk she usually started to hit me for no reason at all... The party had a wonderful start. Everybody was having a great time.
Mother pretended that she had a great time but I knew she wasn't happy at all..." Sandra looked down at the ground.
When she looked at Harry again, he saw her eyes filled with tears.
"The day before the party she had hit me again. She probably felt guilty about hitting me one day before my birthday so she arranged a party. I can sometimes read people's feelings, conscience and mind. My mum knew I could do that and so did the rest of my family. My mum was definitely feeling guilty...
At the end of the party, when almost all of the children were asleep, except me, the grown-ups started to open bottles of wine and alcohol. I couldn't sleep. I had locked myself in the bathroom.
I could hear all of my mum's thoughts in my head. That was the first time I heard thoughts this way. I kept banging my head against the walls, trying to stop the voices in my mind.
In the meantime, my mum was getting much drunker. I wanted it all to stop but I didn't know how to stop it. So I ran away. I know I shouldn't have done that, because I ran into my mother. She was laughing. I thought my head was going to explode. I was screaming inside. No one paid any attention of me.
I couldn't take it anymore. My mum started screaming so loudly I thought I would be deaf forever, but I enjoyed her scream. The voices were starting to fade away. Everybody had stopped doing whatever they were doing and looked at my mother. I had stopped screaming, but my whole body was shaking. People around us had no idea what to do.
Mum fell on the floor and didn't move. She was dead. I had killed her. All I wanted to do was to stop the voices in my head; I never wanted it to go so far. I don't know how I killed her. I just wanted the voices to stop."
Harry saw Sandra's face; it was all full of tears. She turned her back on Harry and continued.
"My dad had died in a car accident when I was four. He went out so he could by me a toy but he never came back. So I couldn't live with him after my mum died. None of my relatives wanted to take me into their homes, who would want a mind-reader in their home?
So the Ministry of Magic in Sweden had me adopted by this old woman named Anita. She is a psychiatrist and a witch. I live with her now; it's been almost three years now. Since the accident at the party, Anita's been training me so I can now control my power." Sandra faced Harry again.
"What can you do with your power?" Harry asked, he had loosened his grip around his wand.
"I can read minds. I can move things with my will and heal people. But I never use this power anymore, only the healing power, that's how I healed your sight. Now Harry, you can not tell anybody what I just have told you. Only you, Dumbledore and Anita know. And the rest of my family."
"I promise", Harry said as he put a comforting hand on Sandra's shoulder. He had completely forgotten about how she had healed his sight. "I guess it is your turn to ask me something", he said then.
"Yes it is. When is your birthday?"
"On the 31st of July", Harry said and wondered why she didn't ask him serious questions.
"Ask something then."
"Why are you asking me so stupid questions while I am asking you serious ones?"
"I don't know. I just don't feel like asking you very personal things. But I will...soon", Sandra said with a bright smile.
Harry eyed her closely. She wasn't what he had expected her to be at all. She had lost her parents too, he was not alone!
"So... I guess I wasn't what you expected me to be", Sandra said, as she had read his thoughts.
"Did you just read my thoughts?" Harry asked quickly.
"Read your thoughts? No, I told you I never use my power. So, Harry, tell me more about your friends."
"OK. Well, I met Ron Weasley on the train to Hogwarts and we became friends right away. He isn't rich, but he wishes that he was. At least he has a family who cares about him, unlike me. I would gladly share all of my gold with the Weasleys', but I know they'd never allow me to. They don't know much about muggles since they're pureblood.
My other friend, Hermione Granger, she comes from a muggle family. She is the first witch in her family, but she is the best at our school. Even though she's muggleborn, she beats everybody in her classes. I wouldn't be surprised if she is reading right now."
Harry then noticed how much he missed Ron and Hermione. He felt a little bad about not writing them as much as usual. "So how about you. Who are your friends?" Harry asked Sandra.
"My friends. Well I don't have any friends. After the accident at the party I forbade myself to get close to anyone. So when I go to school everyday, everyone stay out of my way. They notice that something is wrong with me."
"I want to be your friend, if you allow me to", Harry said softly. "We'd better go home now."
"Do you really want to be my friend?"
"Yes, I would. So, a minute ago, you said that you go to school everyday. Does that mean that you return home everyday?"
"Yeah, I live in a magical area. Well actually, I live in a very little village which has a magical school in the neighborhood. The school is only two minutes from home so it's not far. And the school isn't as big as Hogwarts."
"Oh, I didn't know such schools existed."
"You don't know much then."
"So I guess we should stop this little game we're playing. But first I want you to promise me something. If you want to be my friend, can you promise me that you will not hurt me?"
"Why on earth are you asking me a question like that? Of course I will never hurt you. Friends don't do that."
"Let's just say that if we get close friends, very close, and you hurt me I will become evil. Very evil."
"How evil?" Harry asked slowly.
"Evil enough to kill you", Sandra answered with a sigh. "And can easily misunderstand things. That's why I need you to promise. Your promise will mean a lot to me."
"Sure, I promise I will never hurt you", Harry said after considering a while. Sandra seemed so innocent and vulnerable. Right at that moment he felt like he would do anything for her. He felt sorry for her.
She had lost both of her parents, just like him. She felt guilty about their death, just like him. They had a lot in common. And Harry felt for sure that they had more in common then they thought.
When Sandra and Harry got home, the Dursleys' didn't even ask where they had been and Harry was glad they didn't. Dudley was already asleep since he was supposed to wake up early in the morning the next day.
Harry fell asleep while thinking about Sandra. She was strange, in a weird way, but he liked her to be strange.
He had been so busy with his own problems that he forgot that other people also had problems. He never wrote long letters to his friends and he felt bad about it. But he wasn't in the mood to answer all of the questions they were asking him.
They didn't mention Sirius at all, but Harry knew that they were thinking about it. This summer, he didn't feel like to go over to the Weasleys'. He decided to write a letter, but he fell asleep, with Sandra in his mind, before he had a chance to.
~^~Dream~^~
He looked around. It was dark and cold. He couldn't see a thing. "Hello", he said. "Is anybody here?" he said a little louder.
Nobody answered. It was quite. Why couldn't he see anything? Why was it all dark? Maybe he was blind...? He felt all alone.
He didn't like it. He didn't like the darkness, but suddenly, it started to get brighter. Soon Harry could see where he was. He was standing on a rock. He had a weird feeling.
He felt that if he would go of the rock he would stop existing. But why was he on a rock? He tried to look around, but he couldn't see anything. It was like if he was in a middle of nowhere.
Suddenly, the scar on his forehead burst into pain. He screamed.
~^End of Dream~^~
Harry opens his eyes. But he can't see. It's dark. But then he sees a face. It's a face of a beautiful girl. Harry thinks she looks like an angel. She is wearing a white nightdress and looks breathtakingly beautiful. He can't see her very clearly, but he feels safe with her sin somehow...
"Harry? Are you alright?" the angel asks. Harry smiles stupidly.
"Are you an angel?" he asks.
"Oh my god. You are hurt pretty badly, Harry. I am not an angel. I am Sandra. Sandra Karlstedt. Don't you remember? Do you have amnesia?"
"Sand...oh, yeah, right. I remember now. What are you doing in my room?" Harry mumbled.
"Well it's hard to fall asleep when you're screaming at top of your lungs. What happened? Did you have a nightmare?"
"Yeah, sort of", Harry said slowly while thinking of his dream. What did the dream mean?
"What do you mean with 'sort of'?"
"Well, I don't know if I should call it a nightmare. Sandra, could you please turn the light on?" Harry said.
"What are you talking about Harry? The light is already on. Are you sure you're alright?"
"Yes I am FINE! Except that I can hardly see anything", Harry said. "Can you please heal my sight like you did before?"
"Are you telling me that you can't see a thing?"
"Well I can see a little bit. But it is misty."
"Oh, well I don't understand why you can't see a thing, but I'll try to heal your eyes." Sandra did like the last time.
Harry tried to see what she did, but soon his sight became worse. Now, he couldn't see a thing. It was all dark. Just like in his dream. "S-Sandra? My sight is getting worse. What are you doing?"
"I am trying to heal your sight. Well...I am done now. Can you see now?"
"No. Everything is black. I thought you said that you could heal?"
"I can. But I don't understand why it isn't working right now."
"So are you saying I will have to be blind for...how many days?"
"I don't know. I guess your sight will come sooner or later. We'll just have to wait and see..."
Harry thought about it. Somehow it seemed that his dream and his blindness were connected, but how?
Why couldn't he see anything? And how long would he stay blind? "Sandra...I need to tell you something", he said after a while. He had decided to tell Sandra about his dream.
"What?" Sandra asked and Harry could feel that she sat down on his bed.
"You know that dream I had. Well, you see, in this dream I was standing on a rock. And at first everything was dark then it started to get brighter, but I still couldn't see anything. It was just as if I was in the middle of nowhere. And then, my scar started to hurt, so I screamed."
"Well, it seems as if you're confused and suppressing something. That explains that you were in the middle of nowhere. You feel like you can't talk to anybody that you are all alone, that explains the rock and the loneliness you felt. Am I correct?" Sandra said quickly.
"I guess if you live with a psychiatrist you learn a lot", Harry said.
"So do you mean that what I said was correct?" Sandra asked softly.
"Yes, you were. Nobody knows how I feel", Harry said in a whisper. He didn't really know why he opened up for Sandra. "I don't want to talk about it, though."
"That's alright. You can talk about it when you are ready. I am not going to put any pressure on you."
"Thanks."
"I'd better go now", Sandra said, but she was still sitting on his bed. Harry could feel her bending down over him and he could feel her soft lips against his. He liked it, her lips tasted like strawberry.
Sandra pulled away and Harry heard how she walked towards the door and walked out of his room.
Fifteen minutes later she came back and kneeled down by his bed. She looked at him. "Harry", she whispered. "You are not alone. I know exactly how you feel. We're in the same boat." It was too bad that Harry couldn't hear her he was already asleep.