It's scary how the simplest things render me breathless. A whiff of
cologne. . . a song on the radio. . . small things like that let me escape
the routine f my life. Something will trigger a thought of him
and I'm lost. . .floating through the day surviving on only the necessary
brain cells because the rest are conjuring up these schemes to see him just
a few minutes sooner.
It's frustrating, though. I swore to myself and to him that I could handle this thing. . .this potential for a relationship. And I can. . . except for those small things that whisk me through time to my adolescent self.
It was one meeting. One conversation. One hug. One searing glance and one destroyed marriage. I knew better. He knew better. We didn't care. I never thought I was a self-absorbed person, but when Logan stopped to talk to me, I knew that I'd do whatever it took to keep him in my life.
Nothing else mattered.
Not Bobby, not our dreams of a child and a house. Nothing. It was me and him and the world faded behind us. Sabertooth himself could have been stalking toward me and I wouldn't have noticed.
When Logan stopped in front of me and asked how I was, it was over. One simple question and one nervous, fumbling conversation after, Bobby didn't exist. I knew after Logan gave me his new number and told me that he'd be around, that I was in trouble. I knew as he opened his arms for a hug and waited until I was safely in my car that Rogue was gone. Rogue existed to keep Marie safe and was no longer needed. Rogue didn't exist to Logan. He knew only Marie, only wanted to know Marie. He was the first person to see past Rogue. He was the first person to even attempt to see Marie.
It's amazing how easy it is to trick people. It's almost sad, you show them what they want to see and they are happy. As long as you stay within their preconceived boundaries, they're happy. As long as you don't make them question their beliefs or themselves, it's fine.
Bobby never saw it coming. Maybe he didn't want to or maybe he really was the dummy that everyone thought he was. Either way, he was blindsided when she left. The Rogue he knew wouldn't disappear in the middle of the night with a man she hadn't seen in five years.
Then again, he only knew the Rogue.
It's frustrating, though. I swore to myself and to him that I could handle this thing. . .this potential for a relationship. And I can. . . except for those small things that whisk me through time to my adolescent self.
It was one meeting. One conversation. One hug. One searing glance and one destroyed marriage. I knew better. He knew better. We didn't care. I never thought I was a self-absorbed person, but when Logan stopped to talk to me, I knew that I'd do whatever it took to keep him in my life.
Nothing else mattered.
Not Bobby, not our dreams of a child and a house. Nothing. It was me and him and the world faded behind us. Sabertooth himself could have been stalking toward me and I wouldn't have noticed.
When Logan stopped in front of me and asked how I was, it was over. One simple question and one nervous, fumbling conversation after, Bobby didn't exist. I knew after Logan gave me his new number and told me that he'd be around, that I was in trouble. I knew as he opened his arms for a hug and waited until I was safely in my car that Rogue was gone. Rogue existed to keep Marie safe and was no longer needed. Rogue didn't exist to Logan. He knew only Marie, only wanted to know Marie. He was the first person to see past Rogue. He was the first person to even attempt to see Marie.
It's amazing how easy it is to trick people. It's almost sad, you show them what they want to see and they are happy. As long as you stay within their preconceived boundaries, they're happy. As long as you don't make them question their beliefs or themselves, it's fine.
Bobby never saw it coming. Maybe he didn't want to or maybe he really was the dummy that everyone thought he was. Either way, he was blindsided when she left. The Rogue he knew wouldn't disappear in the middle of the night with a man she hadn't seen in five years.
Then again, he only knew the Rogue.