Disclaimer: I give all credit to J.K Rowling, I own nothing and the plot is the only thing remotely close to being mine! Maybe not even, I also want to give credit to all other authors whose stories I've had a chance to read! Enjoy!
The songs on the end are from Switchfoot: Spirit and 24 and Hoobastank: The Reason. Do take time to listen to these songs is you haven't heard of it, trust me, you will love it.
The ReasonIt was stupid, as he thought of it now. Very stupid, in fact. It started as game, but he didn't think twice that as any game, one would have to lose. Though he thought again, that, as a Malfoy, you were not predisposed to think that you will lose, ever. Draco Malfoy, moved from his place from his desk to his four-poster bed. Most of his roommates were still at dinner; he decided to skip it tonight for he needed to be alone. Although being alone was probably not the best thing for him right now, he just didn't want to be in the company of his house mates and in the plain vision of a certain person, for she has never failed to read his moods, and this time will be no exception. He scolded himself at the thought. He was trying to forget about it…her and for some odd and very annoying reason, his thoughts keeps coming back to her. He hated the fact that she had a certain power over him, he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was, Gods he tried, but to delve in it more, only unnerved him more. To have any power, any power at all over a Malfoy was unthinkable. Ha laid himself down on his bed fully thinking about what he was trying hard not think of. He laughed at that and shook his head.
'Sod it' he thought.
The events that had happened earlier that week kept on repeating in his head, every time, nastier than the one before. He put his hands over his face and fought very hard not to scream.
'Was this really happening?' he asked quietly.
His Father would definitely have something to say, that is, if he knew. Draco Malfoy, heir to the Malfoy name, and future Death Eater was locked up in his room alone, and thinking of one, Virginia Weasley.
***
"Have it your bloody way, see if I care!" Ginny shouted, an angry red rising to her already flushed face.
" Who do you think you are Weasley? Do you think that I care about who you muck about on your spare time? And that you have any rule over my life!" he retorted stepping a bit closer to the defiant Ginny. Predictable, he thought, Ginny, belonging to the all mighty and noble house of Gryffindor, stood her ground when all others probably would've cowered.
Draco wanted her to argue more, retort, anything he can take. Even if their voices got lost in the process he'd endure it. This was the first time in a week that shed even looked at him let alone spoken, and he wanted to make it last just a bit longer, even if they were yelling at the top of their lungs and even if the subject steered at a subject he would rather have not steered to. It was still something.
Seconds passed and Draco hoped that his longing for Ginny to speak, yell, throw something at him was not apparent. For what seemed like hours Ginny took a deep breath and finally spoke to Draco with a tone that had no trace of feeling in it whatsoever, a feeling laced with surrender.
"I'm sorry that you feel that way. I can't change how you feel, that's for you to do, you decide where your loyalties lie. I can't keep doing this, you proved that it wasn't worth it." She said, her voice cracking just a bit towards the end.
"Goodbye." She said in almost a whisper, and with that, Ginny took one last look at the boy in front of her, nodded and left the empty classroom and a speechless Draco behind.
Draco could've fallen, the way she had said that alone was ten times worse as if she was yelling at him. She had not uttered his name, not even his last name and the last bit that had a finality to it that had left an empty feeling in the pit of his stomach. He looked at his surroundings and made his way to the door.
He replayed what she had said in his head over and over again, as to think that it made a difference however many times he thought it.
'Wasn't worth it' he muttered unthinkingly as he made his way to the dungeons, not thinking of where he was going, seven years of practice behind him, his feet just taking him there habitually.
'Did she think it was?' he thought.
***
Draco woke with a start. He had fallen asleep, robes and all. He squinted at his watch that pointed to half passed 6. Feeling not at all hungry, which was not unusual for he was used to skipping meals when he was troubled he made his way down to the common room for Crabbe and Goyle's snore was getting louder threateningly. Once down there he lit the fire that was now extinguished and sat at the chair directly in front of it. He had dreamed about it again. Third time this week he thought glumly. Once again, he buried his face in his hands, unable to control the direction of thoughts his head was taking. He has to face this, one way or another; he couldn't keep running away from the subject. He was a Malfoy, he never ran at anything, he thought indignantly. The thing that got him most though was the unnerving feeling that he had a reason to face this head on and that alone scared him. He shouldn't care, he shouldn't bother, she was a Weasley for Merlin's sake, filthy mudblood loving fool of a girl who didn't have a cent to her name. But whatever she was, the fortunate set of events that led her to him changed everything.
But he will not get into that now. There was more pressing matters, like his feelings and his well-being. He let out a groan of frustration that the Weaslette had caused in him. He berated himself that she had his heart on her sleeve and didn't even know it.
'But everything is gone, now' he thought sadly and felt the weight on his shoulder get a little heavier. He stared into the fire for what seems like ages and finally decided to make his way to the Great Hall before the crowds of people showed up before going to Hogsmead.
He decided to face what he was stalling to face and came up with a final decision. He would put Ginny Weasley out of his head for good, he didn't need her, he didn't need her smile to comfort him anymore. He would not care if he, Draco, hurt her, she deserves it; he told himself more of an oath to himself rather than the truth.
He made to stand up but just then his eagle owl Link had swooped down the entryway made for owls in the dungeons holding a piece of parchment that unmistakably bore the Malfoy crest. Draco gave his eagle owl an appreciative stroke on his head and the owl flew away. This was odd, receiving a letter from undoubtedly his father so early in the morning on a weekend.
He tore open the letter and as Draco assumed, it was the familiar scrawl of his father.
It was short and it read
Draco,
I am pleased to tell you that the Dark Lord has requested to see you my son. I have made arrangements to have you removed out of that school. As you have finished your required NEWTS there is no reason for you to stay there any longer, as the term is almost finished. I could think of better things for you to be doing with your time. I know you will not fail me. Wait for my instructions and be ready.
Lucius Malfoy
Draco stood unmoving on the spot. He read the letter over again, the dawning comprehension that he was leaving Hogwarts should make him happy, but he knew that if he was, it was all for the wrong reasons. He crumpled the letter in his fist and broke out of his stupor. He didn't know what he felt, but whatever it was, the time has come, there will be no turning back after this, he had decided where his loyalty was… is. He had to do what was expected of him, ties or no ties.
Going back to the train of thought he decided on before he received the letter, the usual Draco Malfoy sneer and air of pride that he was know for took on its usual stand, he left the dungeons, thinking that leaving would be less painful if he did.
There was not a soul he passed in his way to the great hall. He was still in a kind of trance about what just happened and tried not to think of what will happen. He was so deep in thought that he did not hear the very light footsteps of one Virginia Weasley.
***
They were face to face once again. Gods she was beautiful, the torches were still alit and it illuminated her face in an almost ethereal manner. She too had stopped on her tracks no doubt to go to the Great Hall as well. They were about 15 feet apart, her face blank, he only wished that his didn't betray him. His mind was going through the last 30 minutes thinking that this might be the last time he would see her, or the last consenting time they would see each other. Should he say something, a goodbye, a hello?
Ginny, who was looking at him unblinkingly finally broke the gaze, and she started walking passed towards him to the Great Hall, he, Draco, taken aback by this, defiantly sneered at her and made to go the opposite way all plans to go get breakfast dashed, but as he passed her, the weirdest sensation took over and the rush of everything that's been going on and its gravity sank in. Malfoy or no Malfoy, he had to do it and before he could stop himself…
"Ginny" he said almost pleading, not turning around yet. He heard her footsteps cease and he knew that she had stopped.
"Ginny…I…" he began and faced her.
"Life is not what I thought it was, there are reasons to admit that I'm wrong." He started
"I'm
not a perfect person, there's many things I wish I didn't do,
but I continue learning, I never meant to do those things to you,
and so I have to say before I go, that I just want you to know.
I've found a reason for me, to want to change who I used to be, and the reason
is you.
I'm sorry that I hurt you, it's something I must live with everyday,
and all the pain I put you through, I wish that I could take it all away,
and be the one who catches all your tears.
I've found a reason to show,
a side of me you didn't know,
I found all that I want, all that I longed for in you
But wasted time is when I'm far from you. I just wanted you to know that. Goodbye Ginny."
Draco finished and he didn't know if he wanted her to say anything or not. He didn't wait to find out, that took all he had and everything he stood for, everything he was to take a back seat, he was in pain, and he didn't know from what. He took one last look at her face as to preserve it one last time in his memory and with out another word started back to the dungeons, this time, leaving Ginny the one that was left looking after the boy.