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'Everything changes but beauty remains'
A Moment like This – Kelly Clarkson
Marissa Cooper straightened the maths paper and tried to focus. Trigonometry always made her frustrated. She had never understood it. She let out a sigh and leaned back on her chair surveying the library on Harbour. The normal studious few were in the library as were others. Marianne was one. Who would think that she of all people would come to the library? The girl's mind worked like Summer's. They could have passed for sisters. She waved a quick hello and Marianne went back to studying leaving Marissa bewildered. She was actually studying? Yawning she checked her cell for messages and looked around once more. Boring. Who would have thought Marissa Cooper would be stuck in the library on a Friday afternoon? Things had changed.
Hearing some movement she turned and saw Ryan enter. Marianne looked up also and smiled at Ryan who smiled back. Marissa froze. What the hell? How did she know him? Ryan walked to a table and dropped his books. The sound made more people look up. Ryan caught Marissa's eye as he sat down. She smiled uncertainly at him. He forced a smile back and pulled out his trig homework. Pulling out his pen he glanced at Marissa who was chewing on her lip looking obviously confused and frustrated. Ryan looked away as he remembered the 'study' dates they had spent together. They had always ended up doing something other studying. Marissa hated maths. He remembered how he used to watch her when she used to bite her lip when she didn't understand a problem Or when something was wrong. A cell phone ring jerked him out of his thoughts.
Marissa fumbled with that phone trying to ignore the glares that were sent her way for disturbing the silence. She walked outside and answered the phone.
"Hello?"
"Coop? Where are you?"
"Summer? I'm at the library. Why?"
"The library? What for?"
"For studying Sum. I have a ton of homework"
"Whatever. Ok listen we have to go shopping"
"No Summer we don't. I really have to get this stuff done"
"What? Coop what's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong Summer. I just have to do this."
Summer was silent. When did Marissa ever give up the chance to go shopping? Since she broke up with Ryan. Summer waved away her thoughts.
"Coop? If you wanna talk I'm here kay?"
"Yeah of course. Have fun"
She hung up before Summer could say anything. What was wrong with her? Marissa leaned over the railing inhaling the ocean air trying to clear her mind. Ever since she had broken up with Ryan she had thrown herself into her schoolwork. She hardly ever went out with Summer anymore. To say that her father was worried about her would be the understatement of the century. He had tried to take her out so many times but Marissa had shrugged off the suggestion saying she had homework.
Life was so worthless. What was the point of doing anything when things were just going to get worse? Furiously wiping away a tear she turned her head to catch the breeze that tossed her hair across her face. Ryan had been her strength. She had given up so much for him and like everyone he had also abandoned her. She honestly didn't know why she was surprised. She should have known it was too good to be true. It had been her fault too. If only they could start over. She could show Ryan that she was secure in her life. That was the thing that scared her the most. Because she knew she wasn't secure at all. And without Ryan she didn't know how she was going to be.
Not even bothering to stop the stream of tears flowing down her face Marissa hurried back and picked up her books and virtually sprinted out of the library. Starting the car she drove home and was relieved to find it empty. Dumping her stuff at the bottom of the stairs Marissa collapsed on her bed where for the first time after her split up she broke down. Her body shook with sobs. Great wracking sobs that felt that they would break her.
Not for the first time on her life Marissa Cooper felt completely and utterly alone.
I wonder how I ever made it through a day
How did I settle for a world in shades of grey?
When you go in circles all the scenery looks the same
And you don't know why
Then I looked into your eyes and the world stretched out in front of me
And I realised
I never lived before your love
I never felt before your touch
I never needed anyone to make me feel alive
But then again
I wasn't really living
I never lived
Before your love
I wanted more than just an ordinary life
All of my dreams seemed like castles in the sky
I stand before you when my heart is in your hands
And I don't know how
I survived without your kiss
Cause you've given me a reason to exist
I never lived before your love
I never felt before your touch
I never needed anyone to make me feel alive
But then again
I wasn't really living
I never lived
Before your love
I never lived before your love
And I don't know why
Why the sun decides to shine
But you've breathed your love into me just in time
I never lived before your love
I never felt before your touch
I never needed anyone to make me feel alive
But then again
I wasn't really living
I never lived
I never lived before your love
Ryan watched as Marissa ran out of the library. What happened? He started to rise but as she rushed past him he sat back down. He felt like he was drowning in guilt. Was she crying because of him? He picked up his books and walked out of the library. He was almost out when he heard footsteps behind him.
"RYAN!" He turned around and saw Marianne running to catch up with him.
"Uh hey"
He didn't know her very well but had talked to her a few times. She was friends with Summer and Marissa but that's all he pretty juch knew about her.
"Hi," Marianne smiled, "Where are you going?"
Ryan glanced at his car.
"Uh I was gonna go home."
Marianne was quiet for a while.
"Don't go after her Ryan"
Ryan sent her a confused look. What?
Marianne shook her head. "I mean it. She doesn't need you to see her like she was. If you still care for her then don't ok?"
Ryan didn't answer.
"Ryan. I mean it."
Ryan looked up. "Yeah. Alright."
"Promise?"
Ryan nodded and turned to go.
Marianne smiled once more.
"Thanks Ryan. Have a good weekend"
"Yeah you too"
He walked back to the car and threw his stuff in the passenger seat.
Marianne's words kept repeating themselves in his head.
She doesn't need you to see her like she was. If you still care for her then don't.
He started the car and rested his hands on the wheel. He didn't know what to think. He had broken up with Marissa for a reason but he didn't know that it would have this kind of effect on her. Ryan reversed out of the car park and drove to the beach. He really needed to think. About everything.
Before Your Love – Kelly Clarkson
'Everything changes but beauty remains'
A Moment like This – Kelly Clarkson
Marissa Cooper straightened the maths paper and tried to focus. Trigonometry always made her frustrated. She had never understood it. She let out a sigh and leaned back on her chair surveying the library on Harbour. The normal studious few were in the library as were others. Marianne was one. Who would think that she of all people would come to the library? The girl's mind worked like Summer's. They could have passed for sisters. She waved a quick hello and Marianne went back to studying leaving Marissa bewildered. She was actually studying? Yawning she checked her cell for messages and looked around once more. Boring. Who would have thought Marissa Cooper would be stuck in the library on a Friday afternoon? Things had changed.
Hearing some movement she turned and saw Ryan enter. Marianne looked up also and smiled at Ryan who smiled back. Marissa froze. What the hell? How did she know him? Ryan walked to a table and dropped his books. The sound made more people look up. Ryan caught Marissa's eye as he sat down. She smiled uncertainly at him. He forced a smile back and pulled out his trig homework. Pulling out his pen he glanced at Marissa who was chewing on her lip looking obviously confused and frustrated. Ryan looked away as he remembered the 'study' dates they had spent together. They had always ended up doing something other studying. Marissa hated maths. He remembered how he used to watch her when she used to bite her lip when she didn't understand a problem Or when something was wrong. A cell phone ring jerked him out of his thoughts.
Marissa fumbled with that phone trying to ignore the glares that were sent her way for disturbing the silence. She walked outside and answered the phone.
"Hello?"
"Coop? Where are you?"
"Summer? I'm at the library. Why?"
"The library? What for?"
"For studying Sum. I have a ton of homework"
"Whatever. Ok listen we have to go shopping"
"No Summer we don't. I really have to get this stuff done"
"What? Coop what's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong Summer. I just have to do this."
Summer was silent. When did Marissa ever give up the chance to go shopping? Since she broke up with Ryan. Summer waved away her thoughts.
"Coop? If you wanna talk I'm here kay?"
"Yeah of course. Have fun"
She hung up before Summer could say anything. What was wrong with her? Marissa leaned over the railing inhaling the ocean air trying to clear her mind. Ever since she had broken up with Ryan she had thrown herself into her schoolwork. She hardly ever went out with Summer anymore. To say that her father was worried about her would be the understatement of the century. He had tried to take her out so many times but Marissa had shrugged off the suggestion saying she had homework.
Life was so worthless. What was the point of doing anything when things were just going to get worse? Furiously wiping away a tear she turned her head to catch the breeze that tossed her hair across her face. Ryan had been her strength. She had given up so much for him and like everyone he had also abandoned her. She honestly didn't know why she was surprised. She should have known it was too good to be true. It had been her fault too. If only they could start over. She could show Ryan that she was secure in her life. That was the thing that scared her the most. Because she knew she wasn't secure at all. And without Ryan she didn't know how she was going to be.
Not even bothering to stop the stream of tears flowing down her face Marissa hurried back and picked up her books and virtually sprinted out of the library. Starting the car she drove home and was relieved to find it empty. Dumping her stuff at the bottom of the stairs Marissa collapsed on her bed where for the first time after her split up she broke down. Her body shook with sobs. Great wracking sobs that felt that they would break her.
Not for the first time on her life Marissa Cooper felt completely and utterly alone.
I wonder how I ever made it through a day
How did I settle for a world in shades of grey?
When you go in circles all the scenery looks the same
And you don't know why
Then I looked into your eyes and the world stretched out in front of me
And I realised
I never lived before your love
I never felt before your touch
I never needed anyone to make me feel alive
But then again
I wasn't really living
I never lived
Before your love
I wanted more than just an ordinary life
All of my dreams seemed like castles in the sky
I stand before you when my heart is in your hands
And I don't know how
I survived without your kiss
Cause you've given me a reason to exist
I never lived before your love
I never felt before your touch
I never needed anyone to make me feel alive
But then again
I wasn't really living
I never lived
Before your love
I never lived before your love
And I don't know why
Why the sun decides to shine
But you've breathed your love into me just in time
I never lived before your love
I never felt before your touch
I never needed anyone to make me feel alive
But then again
I wasn't really living
I never lived
I never lived before your love
Ryan watched as Marissa ran out of the library. What happened? He started to rise but as she rushed past him he sat back down. He felt like he was drowning in guilt. Was she crying because of him? He picked up his books and walked out of the library. He was almost out when he heard footsteps behind him.
"RYAN!" He turned around and saw Marianne running to catch up with him.
"Uh hey"
He didn't know her very well but had talked to her a few times. She was friends with Summer and Marissa but that's all he pretty juch knew about her.
"Hi," Marianne smiled, "Where are you going?"
Ryan glanced at his car.
"Uh I was gonna go home."
Marianne was quiet for a while.
"Don't go after her Ryan"
Ryan sent her a confused look. What?
Marianne shook her head. "I mean it. She doesn't need you to see her like she was. If you still care for her then don't ok?"
Ryan didn't answer.
"Ryan. I mean it."
Ryan looked up. "Yeah. Alright."
"Promise?"
Ryan nodded and turned to go.
Marianne smiled once more.
"Thanks Ryan. Have a good weekend"
"Yeah you too"
He walked back to the car and threw his stuff in the passenger seat.
Marianne's words kept repeating themselves in his head.
She doesn't need you to see her like she was. If you still care for her then don't.
He started the car and rested his hands on the wheel. He didn't know what to think. He had broken up with Marissa for a reason but he didn't know that it would have this kind of effect on her. Ryan reversed out of the car park and drove to the beach. He really needed to think. About everything.
Before Your Love – Kelly Clarkson