WARNING: Huge Honkin' ton of Angst. Suicidal references.
Spoilers for Lost City I & II, Heroes I & II, Death Knell and Stargate: The Movie
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The battle was over, and all was silent. Anubis was gone, probably. Jack had just saved the world, again.
Daniel Jackson walked the halls of the SGC aimlessly. First, he found his way to Jacks office. Jack wasn't there, although he never really was.
More often than not he was in the Control room. Of course, Jack wasn't there now either. Neither was General Hammond, for that matter.
The infirmary. All of SG-1, but especially Jack, seemed to spend too much time in there. Jack wasn't there, though. Janet Frasier was gone as well. Daniel felt the pangs of sadness at this. Maybe they might get Jack back, but Janet was gone.
The only other place you ever found Jack was Sam's Lab.
When he walked in, he noticed that she wasn't there. That was strange. He hadn't seen her on any of his previous wanderings, either. Hmmm... where was she?
Picking up the phone, he dialed the Guardhouse. "Hi, is Major Carter on base?"
"Yes sir, she is, but I saw her headed off into the woods about five minutes ago."
"Um, OK, thanks." He hung up. She hadn't taken this whole thing very well. Maybe he should go check on her. Making up his mind, he walked to the elevator.
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She walked slowly. There wasn't a point in rushing. She felt oddly at peace. For once, nothing was going through her mind.
*Wow, Carter. YOU not thinking!? Impossible.*
She would have laughed at his voice inside her head, but she was emotionally drained, and laughing would have been too much work. She continued on.
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Daniel found her by the cliff. The one he often found Jack by in those early days, before the first mission to Abydos. He would stand there, toes over the edge, eyes closed, swaying in the wind, as if daring it to blow him over the edge. Daniel had always marveled at how he could do that without falling. He could barely close his eyes on level ground without losing his balance. It must have been all those years of jump training in the Special Forces. He would stand there for hours, staring at nothing.
He would stand exactly how Sam was standing now. Toes over the edge, arms folded, eyes closed.
When Jack had done it, Daniel hadn't understood it for what it was. Now, having felt the pain of the past few years, he did. He felt a tight knot in his stomach.
"Sam?" Relieved that she didn't jump just to escape him, he watched as she turned around.
And he gasped. It was her eyes. He had seen that look before. Once. When he asked Jack, on that first mission to Abydos, if he had a family, anyone who cared about him.
"Sam?"
She just stared at him. Or stared through him.
"Sam, please come here." She actually complied. Taking her in his arms, he held her tight.
They stayed like that for eternity, before she spoke. "Why can't it just stop?"
"Why can't what stop?"
"Everyone leaving me. Janets gone. Dad's gone. Now the Colonel is..." She choked on her words.
"He's not gone, Sam. We'll get him back."
"You sure?"
Daniel smiled reassuringly. "Of course."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Don't hate me, please! I like Sam, but it just had to be written.
XXXXXXXXXXX
The battle was over, and all was silent. Anubis was gone, probably. Jack had just saved the world, again.
Daniel Jackson walked the halls of the SGC aimlessly. First, he found his way to Jacks office. Jack wasn't there, although he never really was.
More often than not he was in the Control room. Of course, Jack wasn't there now either. Neither was General Hammond, for that matter.
The infirmary. All of SG-1, but especially Jack, seemed to spend too much time in there. Jack wasn't there, though. Janet Frasier was gone as well. Daniel felt the pangs of sadness at this. Maybe they might get Jack back, but Janet was gone.
The only other place you ever found Jack was Sam's Lab.
When he walked in, he noticed that she wasn't there. That was strange. He hadn't seen her on any of his previous wanderings, either. Hmmm... where was she?
Picking up the phone, he dialed the Guardhouse. "Hi, is Major Carter on base?"
"Yes sir, she is, but I saw her headed off into the woods about five minutes ago."
"Um, OK, thanks." He hung up. She hadn't taken this whole thing very well. Maybe he should go check on her. Making up his mind, he walked to the elevator.
XXXXXXXXX
She walked slowly. There wasn't a point in rushing. She felt oddly at peace. For once, nothing was going through her mind.
*Wow, Carter. YOU not thinking!? Impossible.*
She would have laughed at his voice inside her head, but she was emotionally drained, and laughing would have been too much work. She continued on.
XXXXXXXXX
Daniel found her by the cliff. The one he often found Jack by in those early days, before the first mission to Abydos. He would stand there, toes over the edge, eyes closed, swaying in the wind, as if daring it to blow him over the edge. Daniel had always marveled at how he could do that without falling. He could barely close his eyes on level ground without losing his balance. It must have been all those years of jump training in the Special Forces. He would stand there for hours, staring at nothing.
He would stand exactly how Sam was standing now. Toes over the edge, arms folded, eyes closed.
When Jack had done it, Daniel hadn't understood it for what it was. Now, having felt the pain of the past few years, he did. He felt a tight knot in his stomach.
"Sam?" Relieved that she didn't jump just to escape him, he watched as she turned around.
And he gasped. It was her eyes. He had seen that look before. Once. When he asked Jack, on that first mission to Abydos, if he had a family, anyone who cared about him.
"Sam?"
She just stared at him. Or stared through him.
"Sam, please come here." She actually complied. Taking her in his arms, he held her tight.
They stayed like that for eternity, before she spoke. "Why can't it just stop?"
"Why can't what stop?"
"Everyone leaving me. Janets gone. Dad's gone. Now the Colonel is..." She choked on her words.
"He's not gone, Sam. We'll get him back."
"You sure?"
Daniel smiled reassuringly. "Of course."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Don't hate me, please! I like Sam, but it just had to be written.