He had to be patient, Billy tired to explain that to Jason who was getting cabin fever.



-Things have to remain as they are. Luc may be a vegetable but he did have friends. They will be looking for me and most of all Sonny.-

-Just make sure they're all safe including you.-



Carly was waiting to strike when she got off the elevator good thing Johnny was there.



-She's out for blood. Nice hair.-

-Thanks.-

-How you doin'-

-Good, better when he's dead.-

-Got ya.-



Courtney sat on the couch. Carly paced.



-Well look what the cat dragged in.-

-Where's your husband?-

-He's not here.-

-So you decided to ambush me?-

-That son of a bitch in the hospital no thanks to you.-

-All thanks to me I put him there.-

-Did you?- Carly scoffed.

-Yes.-

-You did or Sonny's men under your watchful eye?-

-I'm not in the mood. How you doing Court?-



She said walking around Carly trying to calm her raging emotions.



-Fine.- She smiled.

-I'm not done.- Carly growled.



Billy let go just as Sonny was walking in.



-What do you want Carly!?! What the fuck did I do to you for you hate me so much!?! [Carly opened her mouth] Shut up! I'm not perfect I never pretended to be. I didn't come here after Jason, I didn't even know who he was. All ever wanted was not to me, or her because we both seem to hate ourselves. Hate what we are, what we became, but you just push and push. You hate Elizabeth because she had the balls to tell you where to stick it! You hate me cause we're just alike trash trying not to be.



I know what you did, who you are, so tell me why do you get the second chance and I don't. Why did Elizabeth kill herself after you and everyone else got done tossing her aside. [Carly and Courtney gasped] My life maybe fucked up but I'm not as weak as she was. Here I am in your face the day after the fucker broke into my place beat and raped me. [Courtney got up and grabbed her she pulled away. Stepping up to Carly.] You where never better then me, then or now, so leave me the fuck alone!!!!-



By the time she was done Sonny had pulled her into his arms holding her while she cried. Carly swallowed pale, as Sonny scowled at her. Courtney ran her hand over Billy's back as her brother rock the crying women. But Billy had two years of tears to shed maybe more. When she finally stopped she looked at Sonny, he smiled.



-You held me once.- He told her.

-Thanks.-

-I'd say you needed that.-

-I didn't think I had any tears in me, she'd cried so much.-

-I can't believe she killed herself.-

-Yeah. She was in a lot of pain.-

-What about you?-

-I just purged all over you $5000 suite. I think I'll be okay.-

-By the way I like your haircut.-



Billy couldn't help it she started laughing.



-By the way a couple of Luc's friend are in town. I'll deal with them until I find out what they want.-

-Okay by me. You finished laughing?-

-Yeah sorry its just life little turns. Where did Carly go?-

-She needed air. She thought you where lying until I told her I took you to the hospital. Are you hungry?-



Billy smiled.



-Yeah. I hear you're a great cook.-



Sonny smiled. He sat amused for all propose Billy was a pig, she ate like one and enjoyed everything about the meal.



-Your good. You should cook in my club.-



Sonny looked at her in horror.



-Carly would kill me.-

-So, it'd be so worth one night.-

-I know I keep asking but are you all right.-



Billy smiled sadly.



-Yeah. I don't wanna go to head srinker, might put me away.-

-Doubt it they say you've been through trauma. Tagert just says your surviving.-

-Surviving, I like that better. God Sonny you don't know how many time he's held me down. Fighting back got him off, I didn't fight this time it wasn't as fun for him. I guess that's when it went from pimp and whore to rapist and victim.-



Sonny looked at her.



-Its always rape, if you say no Billy.-

-Tell that to an addict in need of fix, who struggles but doesn't say no.-



Sonny took that in to.



-Its still rape. You're not the bottom of the barrel or the scum of the earth. You're a woman no matter what profession you chose. I can't imagine what it was like for Elizabeth, but she came out of it stronger then she was before.-

-Not strong enough.-

-She wasn't raped twice. She fell in love and was played for a fool and still loving the bastard after everything he did, didn't help.-

-Hmm.-

-I didn't help either. I know she hated the blood that was spilled before she knew what Ric was. I also know she was afraid, I was so focused on the baby I didn't think about that.-

-Why would you she wasn't family. She was her own responsibility and she did what she thought she had to. I can't tell you all her feelings I was high at the time once clean all gone but I can tell they're what drove me to drugs like I woke up with someone else demons. Do you understand?-

-Yeah. No offence but Liz was special.-

-None taken.



Billy's sighed.



-I'm new today.-

-What does that mean?-

-It means yesterday I was an amnesiatic hooker, stripper, felon, and club owner. Today I'm amnesiatic hooker, stripper, felon, club owner, enforcer, and rape victim.-



Sonny studied her. Courtney came in.



-God did you eat all that food?-

-Yeah, he's really good cook.-

-How you doing, I thought you and Sonny would get along better alone. You know the big brother thing.-

-That's what he was doing.-

-Oh he's enjoying it. Being the only child not four years ago and then not.-



Sonny smiled smugly. Billy smiled back.



-And on to the real world. Lexy's called me seven times today must be record. I better go before she has a...-

-Panic attack?-

-Yeap. Thank you both.-



Billy left the building feeling better then she did when left rehab for the first time. She head over to Alexis, only to be stopped by Targert.



-How are you?-

-Better I had a break down three hours ago, due for another in an hour.-



Tagert smiled.



-You maybe to tough for your own sanity.-

-Is that a nice way of saying I'm crazy? Or is that what I should be telling the judge?-

-Neither. You tell the judge the truth. I'll back you up on that and use Alexis, Baldwin's an ass, she knows how to deal with that.-

-Cool. Thanks Marcus.-



Alexis swing the door opened and pulled her into a bear hug.



-God are you okay?-

-Yeah.-

-Sonny called told me about Carly and your breakdown.-

-Gee thanks.-

-So what? You deserve it after everything you've been through.-

-Yeah well. I don't know Lexy I feel like I a gave away something a secret about myself.-

-It's called vulnerable.-

-I know what its called Lexy I don't fucking like it.-

-Why fucking not! I broke down called Sonny all kind of nasty things. But I had a right to break down I had a right to be weak and so do you!-

-Elizabeth--

-Is dead, your not her Billy you can't change what she did and you can't let what she did change you.-



Billy took it in. Then sighed.



-I have to go.-

-Billy your not her.-

-I know. That's why I'm still here. Lexy I may say Elizabeth was weak but everybody has a breaking point. But how many do you get before you can't break anymore. I am starting to know how she was feeling before she died. Maybe cause I'm her in body and spirit or maybe cause I've had one break too many. I don't know, I want to fight Lexy, kick some ass take some names, its now and forever in my nature to fight when I hit that point, but someday it will be one hit to many.-



Jason was never one to sit quite but Billy had told him to. Jason was never one to let some else fight his battles for him but Billy told him to. So Jason sat and waited and Billy finally came.



-So?-

-Sorry I had a bump in the road but I'm back on track.-

-What kind of bump Billy?-

-Nothing to worry about.-

-Nothing to worry about drove Elizabeth over the edge.-

-That's true, but I'm not her.-

-Fine. So with Luc in the hospital am I cleared to go out.-

-I don't really see the advantage of that. Luc was a minor problem you and Sonny got bigger ones.-

-Alcazar.-

-Yeah plus Luc introduced him to his lost Vegas friends and they could be a problem.-

-So?-

-You don't have to stay hear but the shadows are a good thing. For now I'll keep my job as your replacement. It will throw Alcazar off and piss off Luc's buddies.-

-Fine by me. About last night.-

-Nothing to talk about story of us.-



[tbc]



AN: So my girl cracked and bounced we all do it. But is she going to be the bigger women and let Jason go? I sure as hell wouldn't you tell me. The Author.