[A/N: In the episode "The Two Doctors," the Sixth Doctor was partially transformed into an Androgum, a species that
eats anything but its own members. This change also affected the Second Doctor, who left afterwards with one of the
Androgums, Shockeye, in search of a decent meal. Wolsey was the Seventh Doctor's cat in the Virgin _New Adventures_
novels.]

Finishing the Cat

A duet by Shockeye and the Second Doctor

(ttto "Finishing the Hat," from the Sondheim/Lapine musical _Sunday in
the Park with George_)

So, they shrink from us - good.
If they knew then we would only have to share it -
And it's much too nice to share.
Such a luxury is rare,
Well, it's really not _that_ rare,
But it's such delicious fare.
So its virtues we'll declare...

Finishing the cat,
How you have to finish the cat.
How you wipe the drool off your face
With a napkin
While you finish the cat.

Popping `em in pies,
What you feel like, making some pies,
What you feel like sniffing the air
In the kitchen
When
The crust is starting to rise,
And the whole house smells like pies.

And how you're always coming home too late
With the Blue or the Sphynx
Or the Manx or the Coon,
How the knack of knowing what kind of bait
Will entice juicy prey within reach is
Expertise not picked up soon,
Waiting `neath the moon,
Tracking down the cat,
Studying the cat,
Following the scent of the cat,
Making sure that snatching the cat
Isn't spotted,
For the law frowns on that.

Studying a trace,
Making sure it's a feline trace;
`Cause the cooking methods for dogs, or for children
Aren't the same,
And the chef gets all the blame...

And when relaxing after supper's done,
While you're picking your teeth with the claws of the beast;
It's a joy to think of all of the fun
Of the upcoming feast.
There's a part of you always standing by,
Planning on the sly,
Catching the next cat...
Maybe with a rat...
Or a baseball bat...

Look, there goes a cat...
And it's succulent and fat...

Seventh Doctor (offstage): Wolsey?