Albus used the combined powers of the revival spell 'Ennervate' and a
bucket of iced water to bring Ginny round. She surfaced from the bucket,
dripping wet and gasping.
"Miss Weasley, it is your turn to do the 'I've Never' thing now." Minerva said, passing Ginny a towel. Ginny paused in the middle of drying her face.
"What?" She asked in amazement. Her eyes drifted over Graham, who had been drinking constantly since she had fainted and was now gulping down his 8th pint, and Severus, with his cloth in his mouth and his eyes wide and fearful.
"Do you not remember? We were playing I've Never and you passed out." Ron persisted. Ginny stared.
"What?" She asked again. Remus checked her temperature.
"Don't you remember Graham?" He questioned curiously. Ginny looked round.
"Who?" She wondered. Graham lowered his mug, smiling and waving sarcastically.
"Me, hi, over here, I know I'm small but, hey, you should be able to see me!" He taunted. Ginny remained blank.
"Who's that man waving at me?" She asked, genuinely confuzzled. Graham gave up and went back to drinking.
"Oh, well, minor hitch, let's carry on anyway." Sirius decided, clapping his hands together with anticipation. "I've never worn Superman underwear."
Harry and Dumbledore tipped their glasses and drank. Everyone else stared.
"Y'know, I didn't think they had Superman in the 1700s." Draco managed. Fortunately, Harry had the decency to look embarrassed.
"I had second hand clothes, blame Dudley. They were his." He mumbled. The others ignored him, still staring at Dumbledore, who was remarkably unfazed by the whole experience.
"Headmaster, do you have any explanation as to why you wore those pants?" Minerva hissed, trying to regain the Gryffindor respectability. Dumbledore opened his mouth to reply rationally but the effects of the alcohol were beginning to kick in.
"HOLIDAY!!!" He yelled. Minerva hesitated.
"Yes, we're on holiday. This is the Christmas holiday." She said tonelessly. "Why did you wear Superman stuff?"
"I LIKE CAKE!!!" Dumbledore bellowed in response. Minerva looked skyward in despair.
"Can you please answer the question?" She tried. Dumbledore frowned.
"WHO ARE YOU??" He shouted.
"Yes, I think I'll just stop talking to Professor Dumbledore now." Minerva muttered, burying her face in her hands. Dumbledore raved on.
"WHERE AM I? WHAT'S THAT THING THERE? ARE THOSE MY FEET?" He hollered. Graham groaned, massaging his head trying to relieve the beginnings of his hangover.
"Christ, let's just get him to sleep and continue the game!" He said eventually, picking up an empty box.
"Come on, Albus, into your box."
Graham put the box on Dumbledore's head and, immediately, there was snoring from within.
"Right!" Said Lupin, relieved. "Truth or dare again, methinks. Sirius, truth or dare?"
"Dare, methinks it shall liven up our sad lives."
"Methinks you will regret that." Said Remus, smirking.
"Well, I think you're both idiots and you should shut up so we can continue the game!" snapped Hermione, exasperated.
"I dare you to kiss Snape on the lips." Lupin grinned. Sirius and Severus blanched. Severus had just recovered from his pink bunny syndrome. He had just removed the cloth from his mouth but said, very quickly,
"Can't kiss me, the evil rodent still 'ere."
Before shoving the cloth back in. Lupin's grin widened.
"Accio cloth!" He cast the spell, and the cloth whizzed past him to hit Ron in the back of the head.
Severus froze in fear and Sirius miserably leant forwards and kissed him on the lips, pulling away as though he had been electrocuted. He then washed his mouth and face thoroughly with stagnant rainwater collected some weeks before in an old bowler hat.
Severus was still frozen. Lupin poked him in the side and he made a 'phweeee k'plang' noise. Hermione frowned.
"I'm sure he's not supposed to sound like that!" She said, stating the obvious. "We must have broken him. Does anyone know how we can fix him?"
"YES!" yelled Graham. He jumped up and dropped his empty beer glass, which mildly concussed Harry. "I have just the way..."
*****************************
IMPORTANT A/N! Nothing serious, the story isn't going to stop or anything. I have a sort of challenge. I will dedicate the next chapter to anyone who can tell me what TV Program Dumbledore's ranting is paraphrased from.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With thanks to the following:-
Mooni: Hey, dying of laughter is the best way to go!
Lupin's Girl aka Fan: Hunt me down? You don't know where I live, do you? *shifty eyes* I succumbed to the pink bunnies loooong ago.
No Comment: okies, I'll do that.
Me: review? Y'mean update?
Artemis Snape: Methinks that will be good for the next chapter *grins at the methinks*
Crookykanks: No worries, I can't spell proper when I'm sober! All the good long words? That's the power of spellcheck!
TheSilverLady: To read is to obey!
Misao: Well, I hope your stomach doesn't explode! Y'know, the paperwork I'd get for that is too much!
Sky: What sort of ball were you thinking of? *narrows eyes* don't tell me, I don't want to know. ;)
Dragongurl: You know the weird thing? I haven't bribed ANY of my reivewers... how strange... they do it of their own accord...
Jinx: Erm... I have candy? *is hopeful*
Embyr Black: To hell with it, if the dares are so bad I'll just boost the rating or let the peasants suffer! *deranged look* muahahaha! About the Voldiefarts thing, ah, sure, maybe I'll do that in one of the next chapters.
Elven Warrior: I like to make people laugh, it's very fun.
Dragon Faere: I used to have that habit until the clock fell off the wall and hit me on the head.
Dragoneye: weeeeelll, at the end of chapters I run out of inspiration, then I wander round a bit, get more inspiration, and write another chapter.
Le Pamplemousse: I think I will do the grapefruit thing, or sommat. Thanks for the suggestions! :D
Ckat44: evil is as evil does (little Lockhart spoof there, sorry)
Vampie: specially for you, I fixed Sev! He says 'buggeroff, go die yourself'. I don't know why, was it something you said? I'd advise against inhaling your retainer, I had one once and it was hard to swallow!
Saria Black-Fred Weasley's Girl: You should stay on the pills a bit longer. Sirius and Snape kissed, good enough? There will be some gay action (why else is Graham there?)
Aubyn Lin: I'm continuing!
Lady Nassah: *huggles* I LOVE you! You go do whatever you like, you make me laugh too. By just putting in reviews that I make you laugh... hang on, that's backwards...
PhoenixPadfoot89: You know, if you had any sanity you wouldn't want to know.
Baby Anne: Yes, Graham N DOES show in the US! SCORE for us! Yeah, I videoed the Orlando Bloom one, I think it's in the video library under my bed somewhere. Like hell I know ^^;
Linwe Amandil: Your review really made me laugh, ya know! Thanks for that.
PhoenixGirl1234567: pointless is my life. My life is pointless. Well, actually, I have to entertain you lot before you rush at me with axes *cowers*
Sunshine*Girl-Hermione: It would be a LND (Late Night Drama) like ER or something. Return of the Killer Dares. Hmm...
Feenamon16: I'm underage, but it hasn't stopped meee! *flys away*
Kalorna Enera: Please don't drown... I have enough paperwork already, and I'll be in a crisis if you sue...
Turis: I'm rather attached to my head and I want to keep it that way ^^;
Sugarcoatedcandy: thankess :) Yes, I think I might be able to fit that in somewhere.... *is thoughtful*
Corey: I am a stupid bitch that has the power to make stuff happen *snaps fnigers and Quirrell's bouncy ball comes past, closely follwed by Quirrell* see?
Sammy-Jo: I'M SORRY! I just run out of inspiration and post the chapter and then suddenly get more! It must be my evil side!
KitK@t: Tell you what, I'll do that.
Heat Wave on Ice: Thankees
CoMiCQueeN217: yeah, it's a pub game for getting pissed quick.
Nina: I don't really like writing 'go kiss your crush' it gets borin after a while. I prefer writing things that are a)fun to write and b) interesting to think up
Draccy: Interesting suggestion, I'll definitely think about that one...
Miss Melanie: That is a truth for her next chapter!
Sweetchick23: I like both, I'll write both alternately.
Becki: I wouldn't recommend it, the hangovers are quite phenomenal!
Fire Star: I'm trying!
Mykerinos: Well, I guess I have motivation. If I don't throw out the chapters quick then you lot will all come at me with sharpened bookmarks or something
Ckat44: *raises eyebrows* is it the killer mice you associate with?
Potter123: Thank you so much.
WOW! SO MANY! Thank you to all the reviewers listed above and anyone I missed, sorry about that if I did!
"Miss Weasley, it is your turn to do the 'I've Never' thing now." Minerva said, passing Ginny a towel. Ginny paused in the middle of drying her face.
"What?" She asked in amazement. Her eyes drifted over Graham, who had been drinking constantly since she had fainted and was now gulping down his 8th pint, and Severus, with his cloth in his mouth and his eyes wide and fearful.
"Do you not remember? We were playing I've Never and you passed out." Ron persisted. Ginny stared.
"What?" She asked again. Remus checked her temperature.
"Don't you remember Graham?" He questioned curiously. Ginny looked round.
"Who?" She wondered. Graham lowered his mug, smiling and waving sarcastically.
"Me, hi, over here, I know I'm small but, hey, you should be able to see me!" He taunted. Ginny remained blank.
"Who's that man waving at me?" She asked, genuinely confuzzled. Graham gave up and went back to drinking.
"Oh, well, minor hitch, let's carry on anyway." Sirius decided, clapping his hands together with anticipation. "I've never worn Superman underwear."
Harry and Dumbledore tipped their glasses and drank. Everyone else stared.
"Y'know, I didn't think they had Superman in the 1700s." Draco managed. Fortunately, Harry had the decency to look embarrassed.
"I had second hand clothes, blame Dudley. They were his." He mumbled. The others ignored him, still staring at Dumbledore, who was remarkably unfazed by the whole experience.
"Headmaster, do you have any explanation as to why you wore those pants?" Minerva hissed, trying to regain the Gryffindor respectability. Dumbledore opened his mouth to reply rationally but the effects of the alcohol were beginning to kick in.
"HOLIDAY!!!" He yelled. Minerva hesitated.
"Yes, we're on holiday. This is the Christmas holiday." She said tonelessly. "Why did you wear Superman stuff?"
"I LIKE CAKE!!!" Dumbledore bellowed in response. Minerva looked skyward in despair.
"Can you please answer the question?" She tried. Dumbledore frowned.
"WHO ARE YOU??" He shouted.
"Yes, I think I'll just stop talking to Professor Dumbledore now." Minerva muttered, burying her face in her hands. Dumbledore raved on.
"WHERE AM I? WHAT'S THAT THING THERE? ARE THOSE MY FEET?" He hollered. Graham groaned, massaging his head trying to relieve the beginnings of his hangover.
"Christ, let's just get him to sleep and continue the game!" He said eventually, picking up an empty box.
"Come on, Albus, into your box."
Graham put the box on Dumbledore's head and, immediately, there was snoring from within.
"Right!" Said Lupin, relieved. "Truth or dare again, methinks. Sirius, truth or dare?"
"Dare, methinks it shall liven up our sad lives."
"Methinks you will regret that." Said Remus, smirking.
"Well, I think you're both idiots and you should shut up so we can continue the game!" snapped Hermione, exasperated.
"I dare you to kiss Snape on the lips." Lupin grinned. Sirius and Severus blanched. Severus had just recovered from his pink bunny syndrome. He had just removed the cloth from his mouth but said, very quickly,
"Can't kiss me, the evil rodent still 'ere."
Before shoving the cloth back in. Lupin's grin widened.
"Accio cloth!" He cast the spell, and the cloth whizzed past him to hit Ron in the back of the head.
Severus froze in fear and Sirius miserably leant forwards and kissed him on the lips, pulling away as though he had been electrocuted. He then washed his mouth and face thoroughly with stagnant rainwater collected some weeks before in an old bowler hat.
Severus was still frozen. Lupin poked him in the side and he made a 'phweeee k'plang' noise. Hermione frowned.
"I'm sure he's not supposed to sound like that!" She said, stating the obvious. "We must have broken him. Does anyone know how we can fix him?"
"YES!" yelled Graham. He jumped up and dropped his empty beer glass, which mildly concussed Harry. "I have just the way..."
*****************************
IMPORTANT A/N! Nothing serious, the story isn't going to stop or anything. I have a sort of challenge. I will dedicate the next chapter to anyone who can tell me what TV Program Dumbledore's ranting is paraphrased from.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With thanks to the following:-
Mooni: Hey, dying of laughter is the best way to go!
Lupin's Girl aka Fan: Hunt me down? You don't know where I live, do you? *shifty eyes* I succumbed to the pink bunnies loooong ago.
No Comment: okies, I'll do that.
Me: review? Y'mean update?
Artemis Snape: Methinks that will be good for the next chapter *grins at the methinks*
Crookykanks: No worries, I can't spell proper when I'm sober! All the good long words? That's the power of spellcheck!
TheSilverLady: To read is to obey!
Misao: Well, I hope your stomach doesn't explode! Y'know, the paperwork I'd get for that is too much!
Sky: What sort of ball were you thinking of? *narrows eyes* don't tell me, I don't want to know. ;)
Dragongurl: You know the weird thing? I haven't bribed ANY of my reivewers... how strange... they do it of their own accord...
Jinx: Erm... I have candy? *is hopeful*
Embyr Black: To hell with it, if the dares are so bad I'll just boost the rating or let the peasants suffer! *deranged look* muahahaha! About the Voldiefarts thing, ah, sure, maybe I'll do that in one of the next chapters.
Elven Warrior: I like to make people laugh, it's very fun.
Dragon Faere: I used to have that habit until the clock fell off the wall and hit me on the head.
Dragoneye: weeeeelll, at the end of chapters I run out of inspiration, then I wander round a bit, get more inspiration, and write another chapter.
Le Pamplemousse: I think I will do the grapefruit thing, or sommat. Thanks for the suggestions! :D
Ckat44: evil is as evil does (little Lockhart spoof there, sorry)
Vampie: specially for you, I fixed Sev! He says 'buggeroff, go die yourself'. I don't know why, was it something you said? I'd advise against inhaling your retainer, I had one once and it was hard to swallow!
Saria Black-Fred Weasley's Girl: You should stay on the pills a bit longer. Sirius and Snape kissed, good enough? There will be some gay action (why else is Graham there?)
Aubyn Lin: I'm continuing!
Lady Nassah: *huggles* I LOVE you! You go do whatever you like, you make me laugh too. By just putting in reviews that I make you laugh... hang on, that's backwards...
PhoenixPadfoot89: You know, if you had any sanity you wouldn't want to know.
Baby Anne: Yes, Graham N DOES show in the US! SCORE for us! Yeah, I videoed the Orlando Bloom one, I think it's in the video library under my bed somewhere. Like hell I know ^^;
Linwe Amandil: Your review really made me laugh, ya know! Thanks for that.
PhoenixGirl1234567: pointless is my life. My life is pointless. Well, actually, I have to entertain you lot before you rush at me with axes *cowers*
Sunshine*Girl-Hermione: It would be a LND (Late Night Drama) like ER or something. Return of the Killer Dares. Hmm...
Feenamon16: I'm underage, but it hasn't stopped meee! *flys away*
Kalorna Enera: Please don't drown... I have enough paperwork already, and I'll be in a crisis if you sue...
Turis: I'm rather attached to my head and I want to keep it that way ^^;
Sugarcoatedcandy: thankess :) Yes, I think I might be able to fit that in somewhere.... *is thoughtful*
Corey: I am a stupid bitch that has the power to make stuff happen *snaps fnigers and Quirrell's bouncy ball comes past, closely follwed by Quirrell* see?
Sammy-Jo: I'M SORRY! I just run out of inspiration and post the chapter and then suddenly get more! It must be my evil side!
KitK@t: Tell you what, I'll do that.
Heat Wave on Ice: Thankees
CoMiCQueeN217: yeah, it's a pub game for getting pissed quick.
Nina: I don't really like writing 'go kiss your crush' it gets borin after a while. I prefer writing things that are a)fun to write and b) interesting to think up
Draccy: Interesting suggestion, I'll definitely think about that one...
Miss Melanie: That is a truth for her next chapter!
Sweetchick23: I like both, I'll write both alternately.
Becki: I wouldn't recommend it, the hangovers are quite phenomenal!
Fire Star: I'm trying!
Mykerinos: Well, I guess I have motivation. If I don't throw out the chapters quick then you lot will all come at me with sharpened bookmarks or something
Ckat44: *raises eyebrows* is it the killer mice you associate with?
Potter123: Thank you so much.
WOW! SO MANY! Thank you to all the reviewers listed above and anyone I missed, sorry about that if I did!