* * * * *
Samantha watched from a distance as Sydney argued with her father. She wasn't sure how closely she should follow Sydney, but Samantha figured that she should let Sydney have some space. She found a clear spot on the wall and leaned against it, waiting for Sydney to give her something to do, or someplace to go. Unsure of what else to do Samantha looked around the busy room. Everywhere people were running around like chickens with their heads cut off. Phones were busily ringing, and there was a line behind almost every single printer. "So this is how the CIA operates. Chaos." She observed to herself. Samantha watched the spectacle with a small smile.
She found Sydney's courage to stand up to father like that, screaming at him amazing. She hadn't known Sydney or Vaughn for very long, but there was something that she could tell with in an instant of meeting them. They loved each other more deeply than she could ever comprehend. The way that Vaughn seemed to smile the minute Sydney walked into a room. And Sydney was no different. She too was the same way. Samantha watched Sydney as she battled with her father (which according to a few stories she had heard was not an easy man to battle with) because she loved Vaughn.
She felt a small tap on her shoulder, and turned hoping to see Vaughn or Weiss. She was just as worried about them as Sydney was. Instead she found a taller man, standing in a lab coat. "Excuse me, are you Samantha Daily?" Shyly, Samantha nodded. "I am Dr. Morgan. Could you come with me?"
"But Sydney," Samantha protested.
"Agent Bristow asked that you be immediately taken to the hospital wing."
"Why would she do that?" Samantha asked, following Dr. Morgan, and leaving the busy room, and going down the silent hallway.
"Not Sydney. Jack."
Samantha was slightly surprised at the fact that Jack had ordered her to the hospital wing. Dr. Morgan showed Samantha to a bed. He pulled a chart. "We got your chart sent over from Hillside hospital." He said, glancing over it. "And it looks like they were doing a pretty good job."
"Sure." Samantha grumbled.
"Looks like they didn't give you a morning dose of your Wellbutrin."
"Wait, is that the stuff that makes me go to sleep, or the anti-depressants?"
"Those are the anti-depressants."
Samantha thought for a moment. "Alright."
"We should be around in an hour or so with the sleeping pills."
"No!" Samantha said, quickly scrambling out of bed. "You can't make me go to sleep."
"Ms. Daily. According to your short psyche profile, you haven't slept in weeks." Samantha had nothing that would prove the doctor wrong. It was true; she hadn't slept since the shooting. And no one could really blame her for not doing so.
"Sydney signed something last night, the nurses couldn't give me anything to make me go to sleep."
"I'm afraid that Agent Bristow doesn't have that kind of power here anymore."
"Please! You can't let me go to sleep!" Samantha begged.
Dr. Morgan laughed. "Of course not now. We have to examine you first. Let's see your throat. Does that hurt?"
Samantha opened her mouth willingly, and let the doctor take a look at it. "Like someone took a saw and scrapped it up and down the sides."
He gave a laugh. "That's understandable. Let me go get your Wellbutrin, and then we'll continue. I'll also grab something that will make your throat heal faster."
Samantha nodded, and was suddenly feeling alone again. It seemed to be the theme of the month. Leave Samantha. First it was her friends, then her 'parents', then her Aunt Irina, and then Sydney. And now, even though she had no attachment to the doctor, the doctor left her. Samantha pulled her knees close to her chest and found a spot on the wall. She didn't even move when the door opened.
Dr. Barnett saw Samantha huddled on her bed. She carefully approached her, and sat down in the chair. "Samantha?" She gently said.
"Yeah?" Samantha said, still staring at her spot on the wall.
"My name is Dr. Barnett. I'm here to help you sleep."
"I don't want to."
"And why is that?"
Samantha said nothing. Dr. Barnett had read the short profile that the Hillside Hospital had sent over, and let Samantha just sit there. Samantha barely moved. The room had a deafening silence to it, as the two sat in silence. Dr. Barnett didn't want to push the fragile girl to talk, and Samantha had nothing to say. "Do you know what its like to feel your best friend's blood on your back, and because you know that their blood is your fault, that feeling won't go away? No matter how hard you scrub, or no matter how many times you burn the same shirt over and over again?"
Dr. Barnett knew she had to tell the truth. "I honestly can't say I have."
Samantha turned her head ever so slightly. The first move she had made in over 10 minutes. "Then there's no way you can help me. Besides, I don't need to talk to a shrink. I don't want to. I don't want to go to sleep. I don't want to go to that place."
"I'm afraid I don't follow."
"Do you realize that every time I close my eyes, I'm there? I'm sitting in my desk getting ready for the biggest test I will ever take my senior year. I'm sitting next to Cher, who's complaining about not reading King Lear. I'm huddled in the masses. I'm hearing the gun hit Mr. Steven. I can still hear the sound he made as he fell to the ground. I feel the warmth of Caitlin's shattered brains hit my face. I feel the burning of Cher's blood as it stains my shirt, my skin, and my soul. I smell the burnt flesh of where the bullet sped past Josh's arms so quickly that it burned the skin. Every time I close my eyes, I am there. That's why I can't go to sleep ever."
Dr. Barnett closed her notebook. "I think we're getting someplace. I think Sydney is outside the door waiting for you." She said, before standing up.
"Can you write the order to make sure I don't sleep?" Samantha asked.
"I'm sorry Samantha, I don't have that kind of power either. I'll see you tomorrow." Dr. Barnett said before leaving.
* * * * *